We don’t know how long our Twitter account will survive for this time. But even if it does, there are some threads which Twitter hides from its Search function, for reasons unknown. Try it yourself – search Twitter for any phrases from the text below. You won’t find them. (Also, some of you don’t use Twitter, so hey, new content for you!)
A handful of those threads mean something to me, so I’m going to preserve them here, unedited, for posterity, just in case. This one is from 24 November 2019. The tweet it references at the start is from a now-banned account so I don’t remember it exactly, but it was something about lesbians being thrown off a Pride march.
[NB as it’s from Twitter, it’s a little bit swearier than you’ll be used to here.]
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I’m going to talk for a bit about why I care so much about this issue, because I know some of you are sick of it.
I’m opposed to the idea of self-ID on every possible level. It’s against science, it’s against reason, against tolerance, against women. But those are all intellectual, dispassionate judgements. They’re not the reason I feel so deeply about it.
(We haven’t had any contact from Twitter about it, people just noticed the account was live again last night and told us about it, so we don’t know what the reason was.)
It’s still quite a shocking read even half a decade down the line.
We’ve only actually had 93 posts on trans issues in those five years, or an average of about one every three weeks. We know it feels like more. And we know that some of you thought we’d gone mad when we started warning about it.
But hopefully some of you have realised just what’s at stake, and even if you don’t care about that, how much it might cost the cause of independence. We really hope we can stop talking about it soon, if only so we don’t keep getting banned from Twitter.
In May 2016, this site published one of the most unfortunately prescient articles in its history. It didn’t actually use the words “woke” or “cancelled”, which weren’t yet in common parlance, but its purpose was very much to warn of the puritan, censorious, hyper-intolerant and catastrophically destructive culture they came to embody.
At the time Nicola Sturgeon had only been First Minister for a year and a half and there were few signs that she was that movement’s commander – or, those inclined to a more charitable outlook than us might posit, its prisoner. It would be two more years before she detonated the bomb that really shattered the unity of the Yes movement when she attempted to fit up Alex Salmond over fake allegations of sexual assaults.
But last night and this morning I was struck by an unexpected pang of pity for the fanatical, fundamentalist Twitler Youth rainbow stormtroopers who make up Sturgeon’s ideological frontline. Sympathy for the little devils, you might say.
And since it’s a somewhat rare feeling, it seemed worth a little exploration.
Facebook is essentially unsearchable (which in itself is a pretty good reason not to trust anyone who does the majority of their work on it), and even when we went to the Believe In Scotland page and scrolled down and down and down and down for an eternity, it was impossible to find.
But eventually we had a brainwave and searched the site’s pictures for the one used in the Express and found the post. He really said it. And it needs some examination.
The National must have been enormously proud when it successfully fought off all the other newspapers to secure this stunning exclusive today.
We must admit, when we had a good look in the “Pete Wishart Victories” section of our extensive archives we drew a blank. So we were excited to read on and find out.
Word reaches us, readers, that Nicola Sturgeon was “furious” when she joined the most recent meeting of the SNP’s Westminster group by Skype. Her rage was driven by the suggestion that the party should trigger a Holyrood election to act as a de facto independence referendum, a policy we’re reliably told is supported by a number of MPs who are too scared of being browbeaten by Sturgeon in front of their colleagues to actually speak out in favour of it.
(We won’t mention their names at this point.)
Our source mentioned to us that they seemed to remember an interview in which the First Minister had revealed a possible reason for her extreme antipathy to the idea – one for the BBC’s extensive and rather good three-part documentary “Yes/No – Inside The Indyref”, which was broadcast in August 2019 and never seen again.
It’s not available on iPlayer or YouTube, but fortunately we happened to still have the show recorded on our Sky+ box, so we went to check, and lo and behold our source’s recollection was correct. Apologies for the slightly wonky quality of this video, as we had to record it off the TV screen.
You can’t move on social media today without tripping over effusive tweets from SNP MPs and MSPs singing the praises of departed Westminster leader Ian Blackford and admiring all his achievements in the position over the last five years, although weirdly nobody has actually listed any of them.
Or possibly the other way round, we’re not sure. All we know is that we’re always surging upwards and forwards but somehow never actually getting anywhere.
If anyone knows when “this process” will have ended and we’ll get our choice – or indeed what she achieved for Scotland in the Brexit negotiations – do let us know.
100%Yes on Nicola’s Summer Reading List: “Nicola in the Kitchen with Husband and guest making cups of coffee, she really knows her way around the kitchen.…” May 30, 22:25
sarah on Off-topic: “Chortling at that, TC!” May 30, 22:24
robertkknight on Nicola’s Summer Reading List: “D’Izzie… Your attempts to promote Independence via the morally, politically and financially bankrupt SNP will no doubt be welcomed by…” May 30, 22:02
sarah on Nicola’s Summer Reading List: “Izzie has mentioned that arthritis in her hands makes typing difficult. And if her IT system has predictive text then…” May 30, 22:01
Alf Baird on Nicola’s Summer Reading List: ““so many of the other writers” What writers? Aside from Doun-Hauden, I don’t see any other books explaining the colonial…” May 30, 21:34
Hatey McHateface on Nicola’s Summer Reading List: “Careful, Izzie! Some of the public do care about spelling. More specifically, they conclude that somebody who doesn’t respect them…” May 30, 21:11
Hatey McHateface on Nicola’s Summer Reading List: “As a writer of “colonially permitted literature”, Alf, why do you think you have been granted permission to publish, when…” May 30, 21:01
Izzie on Nicola’s Summer Reading List: “Meanwhile we who care abiut Scittish Independence are leafleting and canvassing to win bith by-elections. The public dont care about…” May 30, 20:52
Alf Baird on Nicola’s Summer Reading List: ““Crime novels are boring, tedious shit” What passes for Scots ‘literature’ today seems to be smothered by crime books from…” May 30, 20:38
Hatey McHateface on Marvola The Memory Woman: ““disturbed wee brain” Please, Twat H. Disturbed big brain. Get yer basic facts right.” May 30, 20:27
Hatey McHateface on Marvola The Memory Woman: “I would have sworn I only pressed “Submit Comment” once. And it can’t be the DT’s, not this early in…” May 30, 20:17
Red on Nicola’s Summer Reading List: “They keep pretending Nickla can write, when she can hardly speak in joined up paragraphs that make sense. The SNP…” May 30, 20:06
Hatey McHateface on Marvola The Memory Woman: “For that comment, Spartan 117, we intend to cram you into a barrel of boiling tar. Then we’ll set fire…” May 30, 20:05
Tinto Chiel on Off-topic: “@sarah: ah, I see my original has been “passed”. I think it was the reference to JB wot done it.…” May 30, 20:01
Hatey McHateface on Marvola The Memory Woman: ““She has no breeding” Coming from you, Geri, that comment rates A++.” May 30, 19:56
Hatey McHateface on Marvola The Memory Woman: ““She has no breeding” From you, Geri, that comment rates A++.” May 30, 19:56
Hatey McHateface on Nicola’s Summer Reading List: “Quite right. Fit dae they cants ken aboot being colonised? Here’s a thought. If you ken how tae use “schadenfreude”…” May 30, 19:48
ScotsCanuck on Nicola’s Summer Reading List: “In the immortal words of Dick Emery “oh!! … you are awefull, but I like you” (gave my age away…” May 30, 19:41
Hatey McHateface on Nicola’s Summer Reading List: “Strong, the memories of the rejection slips, in this one.” May 30, 19:37
Hatey McHateface on Nicola’s Summer Reading List: “Appeal to the masses. Join forces with Ronald Macdonald.” May 30, 19:35
Onlooker on Nicola’s Summer Reading List: “Not interested in the prurient schadenfreude mockery of anti-Scottish English middle class maggots.” May 30, 19:28
Onlooker on Nicola’s Summer Reading List: “Crime novels are boring, tedious shit. Seems like most of the writers in Scotland fart them out on a regular…” May 30, 19:26
sarah on Off-topic: “You know how to enjoy yourself, TC! Talking of dying laughing, Peter and myself were crying with laughter the other…” May 30, 19:20