In a post last month we referenced a ZX Spectrum computer game from 1984 called “Worse Things Happen At Sea”. Today as we watched the First Minister on the Andrew Marr Show, we were put in mind of another nautical-disaster-themed one from a great deal nearer to the end of the Speccy’s life.
Newspaper sales figures in Scotland now come out in a patchy and unco-ordinated sort of way, with different frequencies and at different times of year, so we thought it’d be worth collecting them together for easy reference.
The numbers below are the most recent figures for each title that we know of – for papers classed as “national” that means November last year, and for those counted as “regional” (which includes the Scotsman and Herald titles) it’s this month.
Figures have all been rounded to the nearest 100, and increase/decrease stats refer in all cases to the corresponding sales for one year previously.
It’s been a fair few months since we last documented the Daily Record’s increasingly panicky attempts to save its own hide over its infamous eve-of-referendum “Vow”.
In its growing desperation, the paper bizarrely turns today to First Minister Nicola Sturgeon, demanding that SHE should be the one to fulfil a promise that the Record made specifically in order to thwart Sturgeon’s lifelong goal of independence.
There’s an extraordinary article in the Daily Record today. Here’s a bit of it:
Alert readers might feel that a few lines have gone missing somewhere between paragraphs four and five. And the fact that they have has nothing to do with dead football clubs, and everything to do with the dying Scottish media.
We don’t follow many Unionists on social media, because you end up wasting your day arguing pointlessly with a lot of people who are never going to change their minds and getting in a bad mood. But we’re told they were all very excited about an article in yesterday’s Daily Record.
Penned by the paper’s political editor Davie Clegg, it’s a long diatribe about how the fall in oil revenues has created a black hole which now means Scotland is – stand by for a surprise! – too wee and too poor to be independent.
So far so meh – it’s not like it’s the first time we’ve heard that record played, after all. But as you can see from the image above, there’s also quite an interesting challenge printed in giant capitals at the foot of the page. We’re not in the Scottish Government, but it’s a rainy Saturday so we thought we might have a go.
The newspaper is a fantastic concept. A cheap, accessible product, it’s a brilliant way of keeping yourself broadly abreast of current affairs. You turn a page and are presented with a diverse selection of interesting stories, often on subjects you’d never have thought to go and seek out in the self-refining echo chamber of the internet.
(Theoretically links on websites serve the same purpose, but dodging “sponsored” advertorial, gutter-level clickbait, pop-ups, autoplay video and pages that judder and leap around so much while loading all this rubbish that you’re about 50/50 to have an epileptic fit before you can read the story, has made clicking on one into a game of Russian Roulette fewer and fewer people are willing to take a chance on.)
This site has never believed that the ongoing steep decline in newspaper sales is a fundamental problem with the format. Rather, the truth is that people stop buying papers because they’re full of garbage.
All five of the opinion pollsters who regularly poll on Scottish politics (Panelbase, YouGov, TNS, Ipsos Mori and Survation) have now published surveys in the past two weeks asking the independence question. So it seems reasonable to expect there’ll be no more polls before the anniversary of the referendum on Friday.
Given the conventional wisdom that the economy, underpinned by that pesky volatile oil, was the main reason not enough Scots could be persuaded to take the leap into self-government, readers might expect that the dramatic collapse in the oil price since last year (when we checked today it was trading at just over $47 a barrel, less than half the $97 it was at the start of September 2014) would only have cemented voters’ feeling that they made the right decision.
You might not think it, readers, but even after all this time we’re still capable of a certain degree of innocent, naive trust in Scottish journalism.
When Nicola Sturgeon didn’t just issue a boilerplate condemnation at FMQs yesterday after ludicrously overblown allegations of Twitter “trolling” by an SNP candidate, but went on the counter-attack over Labour’s grotesquely abusive Ian Smart, we foolishly thought that might make both sides of the story newsworthy.
And then we opened the papers.
We don’t expect the media to be impartial. But let there today officially be an end to even the slightest pretence that it’s at least fair, professional and honest.
agentx on Seven Days Too Long: “Unlike a lot of people on here I have never voted SNP and never will do.” May 4, 12:07
Cynicus on Seven Days Too Long: ““Hope some folk read this so that they can see ‘both votes SNP’ are utterly wasteful. “ ========== Like the…” May 4, 11:42
Dan on Seven Days Too Long: “@ Geri Johnny-come-lately Aidan’s is just the latest of a long series of agitators to rock up btl. He’s no…” May 4, 10:30
Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “Well Scots withdrew them from Westminster. This will be SNPs first real test at Holyrood. The last Holyrood election was…” May 4, 10:12
Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “See AI Dan, this is why yer thick as shit. GERS figures are based on CURRENT spending habits of being…” May 4, 09:44
James Che on Seven Days Too Long: “It would not take many Scottish elections to reduce and eventual delete Colonialism , faster than the mandates given to…” May 4, 09:18
James Che on Seven Days Too Long: “Scotland simply removes the Colonial political parties from Scotland wether they are english registered and at the same time remove…” May 4, 09:02
diabloandco on Seven Days Too Long: “1. ote Counting: Each party’s total votes are counted. 2. Initial Quotient: For the first seat, each party’s quotient is…” May 4, 08:57
James Che on Seven Days Too Long: “The Farage Fear Factors, What about the batshit crazy green goblins,” May 4, 08:51
James Che on Seven Days Too Long: “Curious to see how how the vote count for SNP could hold a majority successful outcome if people in Scotland…” May 4, 08:46
Aidan on Seven Days Too Long: “Feel free Geri, to post a link to the high quality and detailed analysis which shows that an independent Scotland…” May 4, 08:01
Aidan on Seven Days Too Long: “What a pleasure it is to wake up to yet another rabies-induced psychotic rant from Geri. Quite frankly how her/it…” May 4, 07:53
Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “Who is saying we’ll be billions in debt after independence? What do we owe? Zero. Who do we owe it…” May 4, 02:39
Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “Just a suggestion but I wonder if AtLS has ever reached out to Phantom Power to work together? They used…” May 4, 00:50
Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “To lock out other independent parties. Sturgeon boasted herself, live on telly, she’d rather work with yoons than with Alex…” May 3, 22:35
Mark Beggan on Seven Days Too Long: “The Farage Fear Factor, Trump Derangement Syndrome. The Tit Whisperer, Dirty Filthy Labour and Queers for Terrorists. Yes indeed. The…” May 3, 22:12
sarah on Seven Days Too Long: “2016 SNP list vote gained NIL seats. 2021 SNP list vote [over 1 million of them] gained 2 seats. If…” May 3, 21:58
Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “They’re as thick as shit. No wonder the Eppy class shafts them. Dumb doff capping serfs only have the attention…” May 3, 20:53
Iain More on Seven Days Too Long: “Get a life yah toxic wee Sassanach Troll” May 3, 20:04
Aidan on Seven Days Too Long: “No Insider is right Alf, James Cheyne has lost the plot” May 3, 19:34
Mark Beggan on Seven Days Too Long: “These people that told you this are they still in your head?” May 3, 19:31
Mark Beggan on Seven Days Too Long: “When you are right and everyone else is wrong usually means a mental breakdown. How’s the sex change going?” May 3, 19:19
Iain More on Seven Days Too Long: “It is a waste of time asking for a Section 30. Scotland isn’t going to get one whatever. The Yoons…” May 3, 19:05
James Che on Seven Days Too Long: “I have always liked the unionist on here as they are so helpful in making my post entertaining when they…” May 3, 18:57
Mark Beggan on Seven Days Too Long: “Raising a glass of fine malt single whiskey to Graham Linehan. A soldier in the war against evil.” May 3, 18:54
James Che on Seven Days Too Long: “As I mentioned these records of the non- union with Scotland can be researched and checked out, The dummies are…” May 3, 18:50
twathater on Seven Days Too Long: “Unfortunately for you James Che makes more sense with her contributions than you ever did with your constant support for…” May 3, 18:06