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Friends Without Benefits 71

Posted on May 28, 2026 by

We’ll be honest with you, readers, if we were in a situation where a lawyer was issuing statements for us, this isn’t what we’d want to hear.

“If my client had been charged, she’d be in prison right now” is a worrying distance short of a vote of confidence in your client’s innocence.

But the statement Aamer Anwar put out for Nicola Sturgeon last night – her FOURTH in 48 hours, despite saying on Monday morning that she’d be making no further comment on the Peter Murrell case – had rather more wrong with it than even that.

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All The Dirt From My Eyes 105

Posted on May 27, 2026 by

So, having made a statement on Monday morning which asserted that she wouldn’t make any further statements, then making another statement on Monday afternoon, Nicola Sturgeon and her solicitor issued a third statement in 36 hours last night.

And while we acknowledge that this is a very high bar to clear, it contained one of the most troubling and blatant lies she’s ever told.

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No Money Back, No Guarantee 150

Posted on May 26, 2026 by

Peter Murrell wasn’t even locked up in his cell at Saughton (we hope it’s the same one as Craig Murray’s) when the chump-suckering resumed.

And as the Nicola Sturgeon Loyal, led by her most faithful of lieutenants, set out to try to take control of the post-conviction narrative, let’s take a look at just what a boatload of bare-faced bullshit the above is.

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Only An Excuse 183

Posted on May 21, 2026 by

Despite what you or we might think, in the eyes of the Scottish Football Association this ISN’T a pitch invasion. This is simply what a football match in progress looks like.

Because according to the absolutely extraordinary statement they’ve released this evening, that was game time. The clock was still running, nothing was being added to account for the fact that there were thousands of thugs rampaging across the field, and the game was still happening in that moment, until it was ended four seconds later.

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Steadying The Ship 78

Posted on May 15, 2026 by

Looks like this, apparently.

The Broken Rainbow 158

Posted on May 13, 2026 by

The image below is a graph illustrating how many seats each party won in last week’s supposedly “proportional” Scottish Parliament election, compared to how many they would have won if the electoral system had been actually proportional.

The SNP and Greens are now over-represented by 37% and 50% respectively, while the Unionist parties are all under-represented compared to their vote share by (left to right) 26%, 19%, 20% and 23%.

The Additional Member System has failed very badly at its job, from either perspective. “Pro-indy” parties have 73 seats (57%) rather than the 52 seats that their 40.8% vote share should have earned, while Unionist parties have 56 seats (or 43%) when they should have 69 for their 56% of the vote.

(The other 4% of the vote was scattered among 24 other parties or independents, with 1.8% going to identifiably pro-independence candidates, increasing the total “pro-indy” vote to 42.6%, fully 10 points short of current polling for independence itself.)

It is, therefore, a little bit of a stretch – to put it mildly – to present the refusal of the UK government to grant a second independence referendum on the basis of the results as an outrage against “democracy”. Indeed, if any outrage against democracy has taken place, it happened last Thursday.

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And Nothing Happened Forever 353

Posted on May 09, 2026 by

Well, we told you so. We told you in March (and indeed long before then) that the 2026 Holyrood election was a giant waste of time and money that would deliver exactly the same useless Parliament we already had, and so it proved.

The SNP ended up giving half-a-dozen seats to the Greens, Labour donated a handful to the Lib Dems, the Tories split into two parties with 29 seats instead of a single party with 31 and that’s about it. The SNP, Greens and Lib Dems stayed first, fourth and last, while the right-wing split let Labour creep from 3rd to joint 2nd despite losing seats.

A pro-indy tally of 72 became a pro-indy tally of 73, big whoop, and almost every SNP list vote elected Unionists instead, just as we told you for almost a year it would do.

We also told you that the only place there was even a chance of an SNP list seat was in the Highland region, where they did indeed sneak one at the very death of play, only because they’d somehow pulled off the incredible feat of losing Kate Forbes’ old seat of Skye, Lochaber and Badenoch on a huge 21% swing, despite having started with a 15,000 majority in a seat where only 39,000 people voted.

So there we are.

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Pick Your Poison 208

Posted on May 07, 2026 by

At the end of last year we noted the unusual and persistent levels of divergence in Scottish political polling. As polls have become much more frequent during the election campaign, nothing about that has changed. The final polls, published yesterday, are so far apart from each other that they tell us basically zip.

Analysing this mess is meaningless, so we’ll just give you some highlights.

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The value bet 68

Posted on May 06, 2026 by

To pass the time on (praise be to Baby Jeebus) the last day of the Holyrood election campaign, we thought we’d do a catch-up summary of all the seat projections we could find from last month and this month. Here it is.

Now, as it happens we think the potential seat ranges are significantly wider. There are so many factors of uncertainty that while there’s no credible doubt who’s going to be the biggest party, we reckon SNP seats could potentially be anywhere from about 47 to 68 (most likely the upper part of that range), with corresponding ramifications below.

But there’s one potentially interesting thing in that bottom half.

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Anas Sarwar is a winner 32

Posted on May 06, 2026 by

Specifically, of the Single Most Toe-Curlingly, Face-Palmingly Cretinous Thing Said In The 2026 Holyrood Election Campaign, And Possibly Any Election Ever, Prize.

We mean, wow. We could easily write a 1000-word article purely on the top 10 things that are fatuously, obviously idiotic about those three short sentences, and so could you. So imagine how embarrassed the poor Daily Record must be today.

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Binfire Of The Vanities 181

Posted on May 04, 2026 by

For a nation that prides itself on hating the Tories, this is very odd.

And if you don’t see how, let us illustrate.

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Seven Days Too Long 315

Posted on April 30, 2026 by

It’s nearly over, readers. Just one more week of this to endure.

The most miserable Holyrood election campaign of all time will end next Thursday with an election which will deliver Scotland’s most miserable devolved government of all time. Only the exact form, colour and shape of the misery remains to be determined.

So as the SNP promise through forked tongues to cut the cost of living with a pledge they know full well they have no chance of being able to actually implement, while using the powers they DO have to INCREASE the cost of everything that makes life WORTH living, let’s look at exactly what flavour of dog vomit we can expect to be choking down along with our state-approved organic broccoli and fat-free gruel for the next half-decade.

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    • Ex President Xiden on Marvola The Memory Woman: “I think it’s most appropriate that Nicola is currently on a tour of story telling festivals.May 29, 18:54
    • agentx on Marvola The Memory Woman: ““Nicola Sturgeon has said she wishes she had not kept Peter Murrell on as SNP chief executive when she became…May 29, 18:35
    • agentx on Marvola The Memory Woman: “Starmer will be PM “in the next few weeks”. If Burnham is elected at the by election nothing will happen…May 29, 18:30
    • Young Lochinvar on Marvola The Memory Woman: “Duty rumour doing the rounds is that all the gear sneaky Pete “acquired” with others money will not be returned…May 29, 18:17
    • Hatey McHateface on Marvola The Memory Woman: “Call that news, x? I’ll tell you what would be news. If The National could accurately predict who the PM…May 29, 18:07
    • Hatey McHateface on Marvola The Memory Woman: “Might be “resting” somewhere. I’ve heard that does happen.May 29, 18:01
    • Hatey McHateface on Marvola The Memory Woman: ““The term ‘scot-free’ has bugger aw tae dae wi the Scots” Well now. Let’s just wait until the partan-faced lady…May 29, 17:57
    • GM on Marvola The Memory Woman: “Agree 100% We need all the facts out there. Court the only place it can be done. Graeme White’s comments…May 29, 17:49
    • J Robertson on Marvola The Memory Woman: “He probably “bought” and wrapped his own Xmas and birthday pressiesMay 29, 17:44
    • Stephen on Marvola The Memory Woman: “100% and Scotland would have been a much better place if he had not resigned on September 19th 2014May 29, 17:35
    • Stephen on Marvola The Memory Woman: “The problem Nicola still does not recognise is that when you tell a lie you then have to tell 10…May 29, 17:32
    • Luigi on Marvola The Memory Woman: “Can the then SNP leadership be sued for negligence for failing to protect donations? There must be some way for…May 29, 17:28
    • GM on Marvola The Memory Woman: “What’s he got to be in a huff aboot? This is the finest of times to get the videos out…May 29, 17:18
    • agentx on Marvola The Memory Woman: ““JOHN Swinney will request a Section 30 order from the Prime Minister when they meet in “the next few weeks”…May 29, 17:17
    • Luigi on Marvola The Memory Woman: “Implausible DeniabilityMay 29, 16:54
    • Gerry Parker on Marvola The Memory Woman: “Nor all your tears wash out a single word of it.May 29, 16:35
    • Rev. Stuart Campbell on Marvola The Memory Woman: “No, he’s basically just in a huff.May 29, 16:13
    • gm on Marvola The Memory Woman: “That usually means someone has complianed about the content of his videos.May 29, 16:06
    • Jontoscot21 on All The Dirt From My Eyes: “Amer Ambulance chases more dodgy, high profile clients than a pack of dugs after a van. This week he is…May 29, 15:59
    • lothianlad on Marvola The Memory Woman: “See the dodgy pop man is keeping very quiet about his pals in the corrupt SNPMay 29, 15:32
    • Marie Clark on Off-topic: “Goodness Tinto that’s a real blast from the past. I mind when I was a wee girl, one Hogmany on…May 29, 15:27
    • BLMac on Marvola The Memory Woman: “If the money stolen was the property of the SNP, what happened to the £700,000 Independence Fund which wasn’t the…May 29, 15:20
    • Northcode on Marvola The Memory Woman: ““Ye foregoat tae plug Alf’s book!” Doun-Hauden: The Socio-Political Determinants of Scottish Independence (Kindle Edition – £4:99) by ALfred Baird…May 29, 15:11
    • Young Lochinvar on Marvola The Memory Woman: “The thing is, when she turned her chair to face the wall, did her lawyer do the same as well…May 29, 15:07
    • Mark Beggan on Marvola The Memory Woman: “Shut up and eat your porridge.May 29, 14:58
    • Hatey McHateface on Marvola The Memory Woman: “I’m interested to know if an SNP credit card is as multi-functional as the one Mr McColl borrows to slash…May 29, 14:33
    • lothianlad on Marvola The Memory Woman: “How The SNP betrayed ScotlandMay 29, 14:26
    • lothianlad on Marvola The Memory Woman: “Drunk on the illusion of power that comes from the posioned challice. Im also tempted to say…. Poor Nicola!May 29, 14:17
    • lothianlad on Friends Without Benefits: “Keep scrutinising Stu! im sure they are sweating like prince Andrew now.May 29, 14:11
    • Hatey McHateface on Marvola The Memory Woman: “Didn’t you say “phew” too, Northy? There’s several orders of magnitude more difficulty to selling the Scottish voters practical, workable,…May 29, 13:51
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