Now, readers, it’s not much of a secret that anyone who’s still supporting the SNP in the hopes that they’ll deliver Scottish independence is – and let’s put this as gently and kindly as possible – a bit thick.
From a membership high of 125,000 in the run-up to the 2021 Holyrood election, fully 60% have now wised up and left, and the 40% still left paying annual subscriptions to a party that’s stolen their money TWICE and spent it on pepper pots are pretty much by definition the dumbest of dum-dums.
But it looks like even they’re just about beginning to get it now.
Five more years and they might have just about woken up.
Great news, everyone – Scottish Labour has finally worked out how to talk to the people of Scotland. This video featuring the party’s MP Melanie Ward just appeared on the Scotland Office’s LinkedIn page, and it explains the complexities of the interlinked Scottish and UK economies in terms that the UK government hopes all of you awful thick Jocko plebs might be able to understand. Enjoy.
And tomorrow morning, do remember to eat your cereal, won’t you?
Not done with celebrating defeat in an imaginary UDI yesterday, The National has gone with another big polling-based front cover today, and the party’s woke young stormtrooper drones are beside themselves with malignant glee.
The National runs headlines like this quite often.
The sort-of newspaper doesn’t actually have a sports section – it just publishes The Herald’s – but if it did you have to wonder what it would look like.
You’ve had a few pretty gruelling pieces to get through in the last week or so, readers, so here’s something a little more light-hearted.
It’s from an episode of Broadcasting Scotland on 27 November 2020, a month after we confirmed our big story about the SNP accounts and the missing fundraiser money. In it, snug-toed SNP MP Pete Wishart opines that there really is nothing to worry about, and we should all just put our trust in the party.
We’ll leave you to judge whose opinion stood the test of time.
The image below is a graph illustrating how many seats each party won in last week’s supposedly “proportional” Scottish Parliament election, compared to how many they would have won if the electoral system had been actually proportional.
The SNP and Greens are now over-represented by 37% and 50% respectively, while the Unionist parties are all under-represented compared to their vote share by (left to right) 26%, 19%, 20% and 23%.
The Additional Member System has failed very badly at its job, from either perspective. “Pro-indy” parties have 73 seats (57%) rather than the 52 seats that their 40.8% vote share should have earned, while Unionist parties have 56 seats (or 43%) when they should have 69 for their 56% of the vote.
(The other 4% of the vote was scattered among 24 other parties or independents, with 1.8% going to identifiably pro-independence candidates, increasing the total “pro-indy” vote to 42.6%, fully 10 points short of current polling for independence itself.)
It is, therefore, a little bit of a stretch – to put it mildly – to present the refusal of the UK government to grant a second independence referendum on the basis of the results as an outrage against “democracy”. Indeed, if any outrage against democracy has taken place, it happened last Thursday.
Specifically, of the Single Most Toe-Curlingly, Face-Palmingly Cretinous Thing Said In The 2026 Holyrood Election Campaign, And Possibly Any Election Ever, Prize.
We mean, wow. We could easily write a 1000-word article purely on the top 10 things that are fatuously, obviously idiotic about those three short sentences, and so could you. So imagine how embarrassed the poor Daily Record must be today.
Because the truth is that we should all be quietly sending BBC Scotland bouquets in appreciation for doing the independence movement a favour for once.
The Sunday National’s front page today elicited a sigh of “So what?” from most.
We’ve already GOT a “pro-indy” majority at Holyrood and have done for the last 10 years, for all it’s been worth. But to be fair there was a paragraph in the article that at least raised a quizzical eyebrow.
Alf Baird on A Long Hard Think: “Perhaps you should engage a little more with Scotland’s actual very lengthy history of conflict with our ‘procurer’, before and…” Sep 13, 11:29
Captain Caveman on A Long Hard Think: ““I’m questioning the fit between Scotland’s constitutional position and the postcolonial contexts described by Fanon, Memmi, Said, and other theorists.…” Sep 13, 11:00
Northcode on A Long Hard Think: “A personal reflection, a confession if you will, prompted by recent discussions about Scotland’s constitutional status. I supported Alf Baird’s…” Sep 13, 10:41
TURABDIN on A Long Hard Think: “@ SPARTAN & HATEY, Whatever the ethics of buying into political parties or doing deals à la trump with countries…” Sep 13, 10:09
Captain Caveman on A Long Hard Think: ““… but as long as we are ruled by Totalitarian Internationalist Communists we are stuffed, regardless of whether we become…” Sep 13, 10:01
Hatey McHateface on A Long Hard Think: “Whataboutery. But no need to fall out. I’ll STFU for £5k. Bank of England notes will do at a pinch.…” Sep 13, 09:33
BLMac on A Long Hard Think: “Is there no legal way to make the police do their duty? Some sort of injunction or such like?” Sep 13, 09:32
Spartan 117 on A Long Hard Think: “Scotland might indeed be “hoaching” with natural resources however the key thing Communists fail to understand is someone has to…” Sep 13, 09:28
Hatey McHateface on A Long Hard Think: “Some people try to bribe us with their money. Some politicians try to bribe us with our own money. I’m…” Sep 13, 09:27
Hatey McHateface on A Long Hard Think: “Potential FM material. Unless … Perhaps too white, white white.” Sep 13, 09:14
Spartan 117 on A Long Hard Think: “Not that I’m that interested, but the hysterical outpouring of seethe and permatantrum from the usual Communists over Reform’s donations…” Sep 13, 09:12
Hatey Mchateface on A Long Hard Think: “An interesting article on why leccy prices are going to continue to rise for the foreseeable future: https://www.theguardian.com/business/ng-interactive/2026/sep/13/mapped-150bn-megaproject-aims-to-protect-britain-from-energy-shocks Strap in,…” Sep 13, 09:10
TURABDIN on A Long Hard Think: “FOR SALE: ENGLAND…. a BARGAIN @ 72 million. includes also dependencies.” Sep 13, 08:59
Spartan 117 on A Long Hard Think: “Remember Cap’n Blackadder, pants on the head, pencils up the nose and reply to everything with “wibble”. There’s a good…” Sep 13, 08:54
Hatey McHateface on A Long Hard Think: “They’ll certainly fight you off. Interesting and educational to see you harbour the “traditional” Scottish Indy sentiment of cheering on…” Sep 13, 07:53
Hatey McHateface on A Long Hard Think: “Bob says: “Prick 1 and Prick 2” What a tired, pathetic, sterile approach to discourse. The “go to” policy of…” Sep 13, 07:35
twathater on A Long Hard Think: “You would also have noted Willie that the Donald also brought up the situation regarding the Argentinian claims for the…” Sep 13, 03:26
Mark Beggan on A Long Hard Think: “Aye and Mad Dog starting to bark. Statements being issued. Sinn Fein on the ropes. something already brewing then Trump…” Sep 13, 00:02
Confused on A Long Hard Think: “trump says “up the ‘ra” tom harris says andy burnham needs to send him a message – special branch as…” Sep 12, 23:46
sam on A Long Hard Think: “Maybe if I ask Rev Stu he might remove Beggan’s threat of my rape as well? Or Beggan might ask.” Sep 12, 22:06
sam on A Long Hard Think: “I see the Rev has deleted Beggan’s abusive threat of rape to Marie.” Sep 12, 22:02
Insider on A Long Hard Think: “James says: “it is truly astonishing how ‘someone’ can occupy so much physical space while contributing absolutely nothing of intellectual…” Sep 12, 21:24
robertkknight on A Long Hard Think: “Prick 1 and Prick 2 tag-teaming. What a novel approach to discourse. BTL contaminated by the usual suspects.” Sep 12, 20:54
Mark Beggan on A Long Hard Think: “Interesting. There’s a village on the east coast of Scotland where the buildings all have unique red roof tiles that…” Sep 12, 19:52
Hatey McHateface on A Long Hard Think: ““Why would they come to Scotland” Because their ancestors came from Scotland. “such a shithole as you constantly try to…” Sep 12, 19:21
Hatey McHateface on A Long Hard Think: “Near ten hours for that one, twathater. Please tell us it took you nine and a half hours to clean…” Sep 12, 18:59
Dan on A Long Hard Think: “Why would they come to Scotland if it is such a shithole as you constantly try to point out. Why…” Sep 12, 18:55
James on A Long Hard Think: “Young Lochinvar is adept at educating Scots regarding their own history, much of which has been airbrushed out of existence…” Sep 12, 18:53
