It’s nearly over, readers. Just one more week of this to endure.
The most miserable Holyrood election campaign of all time will end next Thursday with an election which will deliver Scotland’s most miserable devolved government of all time. Only the exact form, colour and shape of the misery remains to be determined.
So as the SNP promise through forked tongues to cut the cost of living with a pledge they know full well they have no chance of being able to actually implement, while using the powers they DO have to INCREASE the cost of everything that makes life WORTH living, let’s look at exactly what flavour of dog vomit we can expect to be choking down along with our state-approved organic broccoli and fat-free gruel for the next half-decade.
If events in Edinburgh today are anything to go by – when a march and rally announced with great fanfare seven months ago, backed by both the “independence” parties in the Scottish Parliament and featuring the First Minister as main speaker, attracted perhaps 1,500 people at the most to Calton Hill on a bright and sunny day – the independence movement faces an imminent final apocalypse.
So here’s how to prepare yourself for when the SNP win a landslide with 35%, Keir Starmer says “So what?” and then a deathly silence descends for another five years.
Even Kelly Given and Iona Fyfe didn’t show up for this one. That’s how bad it is.
As the six-year fight for justice for Alex Salmond continues, we thought you might like to see this clip from this morning’s Mike Graham Show, interviewing Paul McManus, the businessman and drummer in Glasgow rock band Gun who’s stepped up to fund the Salmond family’s case against the Scottish Government despite disagreeing with much of what Alex stood for politically.
This clip was broadcast on ITV News Wales this week.
It’s a staggeringly obvious mess for a whole raft of reasons – a number of completely spurious, illogical and unsupported claims are accepted as facts without any sort of challenge or balancing voice (which has been standard practice on ITV News for a while now across almost any contentious political topic) – but it led us to somewhere magnitudes of crazier still.
The first and most important thing to note about yesterday’s judgment in the Sandie Peggie tribunal is that it’s a very big victory. The tribunal found that Sandie Peggie was gravely and heinously harassed by her employer through no fault of her own, and she’ll be entitled to substantial compensation as a result.
It also ruled, repeatedly and unequivocally, that Dr “Beth” Upton (who’s referred to in the judgment as “the second respondent”) is a man.
The motion completely ignored both the findings of the Cass Review and the Supreme Court judgment in For Women Scotland, but not a single MSP spoke in opposition to it. (Jenni Minto, the Minister For Public Health And Women’s Health, actually broke down in tears at the end because she wasn’t managing to get children’s futures permanently destroyed with sufficient urgency, mainly because the UK Parliament took legislation out of Holyrood’s hands to protect them.)
It’s really very hard to overstate what mendacious, duplicitous shite this is.
It did its job, though. As expected, the SNP conference comprehensively voted down the rebel amendments to Swinney’s motion on independence “strategy” and backed his grand plan of winning a majority, begging Keir Starmer for a second referendum – just like Nicola Sturgeon and Humza Yousaf had done before him with Theresa May, Boris Johnson, Liz Truss and Rishi Sunak – and then scuttling obediently away with his tail between his legs when Starmer told him to get lost.
It’d be quite hard to find an image that more completely summed up the wretched state of the SNP in 2025 than this one. Look at that tiny handful of miserable faces, sitting dejectedly around a near-empty function room. It’s so bleak Mike Leigh could make an entire movie out of it.
And we know what you’re thinking – that we sat through some internet livestream to find the most pitiful-looking freezeframe imaginable to show them in a bad light. But nope. Kevin Stewart MSP posted this cheery snapshot of his own free will on Twitter on Sunday morning, presumably in the hope of boosting party morale in some way.
Hatey McHateface on It just takes a beat: “The root causes, as they are of so many things, is unmanaged globalisation, which brings with it uncontrollable immigration, de-industrialisation,…” Jul 12, 09:27
Captain Caveman on It just takes a beat: “Sore head and happy heart. Semi finals is better than I thought England would do. 🙂 Bring on the Argentinians!” Jul 12, 09:18
Hatey McHateface on It just takes a beat: “So quiet here this morning. Almost as if the faithful all stayed up late to watch the England game!” Jul 12, 09:01
Ian Smith on It just takes a beat: “If someone had donated to the ring fenced fund at the same time as buying bitcoin or Nvidia shares, could…” Jul 11, 23:58
Hatey McHateface on It just takes a beat: “Good post, Northy. Don’t take yourself off to Alpha Centauri just yet.” Jul 11, 21:18
Hatey McHateface on It just takes a beat: “It’s worth observing that the regular moon howlers don’t think so. You’ll never hear a peep of criticism aimed at…” Jul 11, 21:10
Bilbo on It just takes a beat: “Demonstrations in a number of deprived areas in Glasgow this week. MSM says it involves men who committed alleged sex…” Jul 11, 20:42
Alf Baird on It just takes a beat: ““Not even liberation.scot can fill the gap if the SNP disappears.” Lorncal, I suspect most of Liberation Scotland’s 20,000 members…” Jul 11, 20:17
Confused on It just takes a beat: “widdecombe? – I think farage done it. He was round at her house, telling gas chamber jokes, having a rare…” Jul 11, 19:54
James Barr Gardner on It just takes a beat: “You’ve hit the nail on the head with your comment, some of these cultists have threatened violence against those who…” Jul 11, 18:38
Lorncal on It just takes a beat: “Alf: you illustrate my point well. I agree that a massive civic political movement for independence would be preferred, perhaps,…” Jul 11, 17:43
twathater on It just takes a beat: “Stuart Campbell would certainly have earned that ACCOLADE ,yet there are still moronic snp apologists and sycophants over t’Internet ACCUSING…” Jul 11, 17:00
Alf Baird on It just takes a beat: “The point both you and Andy, and the Rev and others miss, Lorncal, is that we do not need another…” Jul 11, 15:50
Young Lochinvar on It just takes a beat: “Rev Further to your interview with Martin Geisler is there any sign of John Swinney having taken up residence in…” Jul 11, 15:43
Lorncal on It just takes a beat: “Andy: I agree with the Rev’s logic and your comment, but, again, what is going to replace the SNP? The…” Jul 11, 14:35
Luigi on It just takes a beat: “The second photo of Honest John is hilarious. He looks like the tin man in the Wizard of Oz.” Jul 11, 13:29
robertkknight on It just takes a beat: “Today’s The National front page… SNP OFFER TO REFUND ‘INDYREF’ DONATIONS Concession despite ‘no evidence of fraud ‘ finding Whose…” Jul 11, 13:23
TURABDIN on It just takes a beat: “more on same meme. WE GOT RHYTHM…..or you’s the bass. https://theconversation.com/racial-stereotypes-of-african-footballers-persist-a-world-cup-is-a-good-time-to-talk-about-them-286673” Jul 11, 13:04
TURABDIN on It just takes a beat: “TALKING ABOUT «MONEY» QUOTE they dream of «corporate monarchies ruled by ceo kings» https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cly8eqyj8e2o representative national government is necessary, democratic…” Jul 11, 12:40
James Barr Gardner on The Only Notes That Really Count: “If you paid by bank transfer and your address and bank details have not changed then the SNP should be…” Jul 11, 12:07
shug on It just takes a beat: “When the civil case approaches the only deal you should consider is Name the Alphabeties Lady Dorian out Swinney and…” Jul 11, 11:31
Knuckle_Heid on It just takes a beat: “Wow, look at all those press articles! And not one of them would be there if WoS hadn’t doggedly pursued…” Jul 11, 10:25
Bilbo on It just takes a beat: “Politicians get photographed in positions under lighting where when photographed, they appear to have a halo above them. When John…” Jul 11, 08:54
Northcode on It just takes a beat: “I would, if I had the means, chase down the ragged, walking dead corpse of the SNP and at last…” Jul 11, 07:34
Captain Caveman on The Only Notes That Really Count: “🙂 He’s a 60kg working lines Rottweiler male (our 7th of this magnificent breed). However, his aggression dial is turned…” Jul 11, 07:32
twathater on It just takes a beat: “That pathetic response from polis Scotland only serves to show just how ill served The Scottish public is with the…” Jul 11, 03:14
Frazerio on It just takes a beat: “The simplest way of putting it is: There is a cover up going on. Simple question. The big question. Why?…” Jul 11, 02:53
James Barr Gardner on The Only Notes That Really Count: “Wee Peem gas offered to repay, meantime he is in the gaol.” Jul 10, 22:45