I went to “Dunkirk” at the cinema today. If you want to know what it’s like, just watch this trailer 40 times in a row and save yourself the £12.
It’s a poor movie, disjointed and aimless and curiously lacking in tension or narrative given the real-life subject matter. (It’s remarkably short on dialogue, which is lucky because you can barely make out any of what little script or story there is from behind the endlessly howling one-note airhorn of the soundtrack. It’s a bit like someone filmed an IKEA assembly manual in live action during a Formula 1 race.)
But I couldn’t help thinking that part of the reason it was so unengaging was because it felt akin to watching a boxing match between two fighters you don’t like. If Mike Tyson took on Tyson Fury, would you cheer for the rapist or the anti-Semitic homophobe?
Deep in the summer news desert, the papers today are struggling for material again. The Sunday Herald has a shock-horror front-page exposé about some photos from an Orange Lodge party that turn out to be from 2010 and 2013, while the Scottish Mail On Sunday reaches all the way back to 1940 to fill a couple of pages.
We were intrigued to hear Labour activist Duncan Hothersall tell radio listeners this morning that his party’s opposition to independence was rooted in “Labour values”, and most specifically by his assertion that “nationalism and socialism are opposites”.
So we thought we’d take a look back at our last Panelbase opinion poll, which we conducted in February, and see what the values of Unionists were.
We haven’t said much about the huge furore whipped up by the Guardian in recent days around spurious allegations of racism/online abuse by supporters of Scottish independence, made first by Sadiq Khan and then by a deranged “Better Together” activist who also thinks all vegans are racist (or something).
Partly that’s because we covered the initial speech by Khan and the fallout from it pretty extensively, and partly because we didn’t want to feed the Guardian’s clickbait.
However, when the activist who was allegedly “hounded off Twitter” in fear for her life – fear caused by supposed comments that nobody has actually seen – miraculously recovered her bravery less than a week later (coincidentally just in time for the launch of her book), we thought it was probably time someone started keeping some records.
The votes for “God Save The Queen” being driven by Tories, English-born residents and supporters of a particular football club probably won’t come as the biggest shock in the world to anyone.
(Alert viewers will of course have noticed that due to MI5 INTERFERENCE in the poll, there were actually two votes for Hoots Mon, which have been suspiciously rounded down to one. We are conducting an investigation, by which we mean brutal purge.)
Judge Dredd: Origins was published in 2007, although in fact the basic story of how Bad Bob Booth became the last President of the USA and what he did next was established right back at the 1970s beginnings of Dredd’s parent comic 2000AD.
We actually have a theory that it’s all the Lib Dems’ fault.
Lynne on Friends Without Benefits: “‘Co-operating fully = ‘No comment’ ‘No further comment’ = Can’t stop talking about it. Stuart didn’t have long to wait…” May 28, 21:45
Alf Baird on Friends Without Benefits: “” for 400 million quid you could probably have jist bought and given everyone on the islands a personal jet…” May 28, 21:37
Mark Beggan on Friends Without Benefits: “With friends like these who needs enemies.” May 28, 21:37
Spartan 117 on Friends Without Benefits: “I’m utterly appalled at the apparent whataboutery and double standards shown by what could only be described as brainwashed fanatics…” May 28, 21:32
Tinto Chiel on Off-topic: “@Marie: sparrows, you say? www.youtube.com/watch?v=HivJ4EosWS8” May 28, 21:31
Bilbo on Friends Without Benefits: “Odd occasion of channel flicking today, think it was BBC Scotland news, clip from Holyrood where one of the young…” May 28, 21:05
Dan on Friends Without Benefits: “Hmm, so no actual specifics with regard to a Plan B then. Top tip. “Fighting for Scotland” would be more…” May 28, 20:46
Onlooker on Friends Without Benefits: “Maybe Ambulance Chaser Anwar just noticed Sturgeon is WHITE! and decided to do her dirty. He’s not a big fan…” May 28, 20:46
J Galt on Friends Without Benefits: “Alf is it true that Cammell Laird/Peel Ports have a representative on the board of CMAL?” May 28, 20:45
Onlooker on Friends Without Benefits: “Alongside Sturgeon’s newest bitter misandrist rant, I am also almost enjoying seeing SNP cultists online saying “It’s not that much…” May 28, 20:39
Bilbo on Friends Without Benefits: “Just to make a point about the tweet talking about how Scottish media isn’t holding Nicola Sturgeon or the SNP…” May 28, 20:26
Geri on Friends Without Benefits: “Rachael Hamilton, not the sharpest tool in the box, asks: “Who needs a £3,775 camera?” AN ONLY FREAK! THAT’S WHO!…” May 28, 20:22
Bilbo on Friends Without Benefits: “Unless the rumours are true that it was a lavender wedding where not only they shared separate beds but also…” May 28, 20:20
Douglas on Friends Without Benefits: “That Sturgeon forbade scrutiny of accounts can have only one reason, media should be hammering her about this; that they…” May 28, 20:18
Aidan on Friends Without Benefits: “I don’t know if you’ve heard about this programme called “the news”, but if you turn it on you’ll see…” May 28, 20:16
AdamH on Friends Without Benefits: “All this talk about did she know about the purchases is missing far more important points 1) in 2020 people…” May 28, 20:13
Bilbo on Friends Without Benefits: “This kind of media feeding frenzy usually gets tiresome as the same information gets repeated article after article. However, with…” May 28, 20:00
Onlooker on Friends Without Benefits: “Kelly ‘Fangirl’ Given wrote a glowing endorsement of Sturgeon in The National, positioning herself as being very knowledgeable about the…” May 28, 19:53
Izzie on Friends Without Benefits: “@Dan 6.57 Plan B is as always keep on working for the Cause. Like when we lost in 2014. Like…” May 28, 19:52
Rob on Friends Without Benefits: “Essentially her position is A big did it and ran away. Where her ignorance becomes gross incompetence, always assuming she…” May 28, 19:46
Bilbo on Friends Without Benefits: “Lets join in with Izzie. Wheest for Indy, for the next 5 years, 50 years and 500 years.” May 28, 19:42
Spartan 117 on Friends Without Benefits: “An interesting take, Confused. Wee Nicola Knew. As per your ex-neighbour.” May 28, 19:30
Elmac on All The Dirt From My Eyes: “Spot on Colin. The theft of £667,000 from individual SNP members and members of the public has not been addressed.…” May 28, 19:08
Elmac on All The Dirt From My Eyes: “Spot on Colin. The theft of £667,000 from individual SNP members and members of the public has not been addressed.…” May 28, 19:07
Dan on Friends Without Benefits: “@ Izzie But that really isn’t news though is it. Pretty much everyone knew that would be the case. But…” May 28, 18:57
Young Lochinvar on Friends Without Benefits: “I Good luck “empress” wandering about wearing no clothes..” May 28, 18:54
Confused on Friends Without Benefits: “I wasn’t going to post on this again, since it’s all been said already and everyone not a Sturgeon-fangirl knows…” May 28, 18:52
Andrea on Friends Without Benefits: “So, that’s how Scotland qualified for the world cup. All that extra practice explains a lot!” May 28, 18:50
Izzie on Friends Without Benefits: “The ‘room’ really dont care .Sorry but its a nin story. What about Westminster saying No thwarting the will of…” May 28, 18:37
Young Lochinvar on Friends Without Benefits: “I Is that was passes for humour this week amongst the party faithful? Pathetic. Total blind failure to read the…” May 28, 18:23
