Ladies and gentlemen, meet the new World Speed-Reading Champion:
Almost 1200 words in 15 seconds is mighty impressive going in anyone’s book. (Either that or it’s REALLY slow for a 12-word tweet.) But we wondered if there might be any other reason why Mrs Angus Robertson wouldn’t want people reading that article.
We’ve just been out for our evening constitutional in the relatively cool night air (Bath sweltered at an oppressive 30C today and Bear Patrol was pretty gruelling), and we thought readers might be interested in what we saw.
The city has observed lockdown with great diligence, as we’ve previously documented, and to be honest we’re not sufficiently familiar with the latest rules to say it wasn’t still doing so tonight. But a nearby park, around 9.30pm, was a disconcerting scene.
The ramifications for Scottish politics of the failed stitch-up of Alex Salmond over false allegations of sexual abuse have hardly begun to be felt. The Parliamentary inquiry into the affair, which formally began yesterday and is due to start interviewing people in August, looks set to be swamped in material – or at least, whatever material hasn’t been quietly and conveniently disposed of already – and nobody knows how long it’ll take to reach any sort of conclusion.
It seems a safe bet that the SNP leadership will be praying it doesn’t do so before the 2021 Holyrood election, for all sorts of reasons – not least that it appears beyond any credible doubt that Nicola Sturgeon lied to Parliament about the investigation.
But while Salmond was found innocent on every charge, he continues to be attacked from behind a shield of anonymity by the accusers that the mainly-female jury declined to believe, supported and co-ordinated by organisations funded almost entirely by the Scottish Government and with very close personal links to it.
So when we were putting out our latest Panelbase poll, we thought we’d find out what the people of Scotland thought about it.
Now, as we noted earlier this month, that might just be down to people getting weary of false dawns. But it might also indicate that a measure of realism is belatedly beginning to dawn on the Yes movement about the lack of connection between nice poll numbers and actually securing another referendum.
We had a little mini-poll out with Panelbase this week, readers. Given that the SNP are currently still insisting that they need ANOTHER mandate at the ballot box to secure a second independence referendum (by our count that would be the tenth), we thought we’d see how many people believed this cunning plan would work.
The results, we suspect, will not amaze you.
Scottish voters, it turns out, aren’t completely stupid.
We’re pretty sure they used the same “separating rival groups” phrasing at Tianenmen Square too, but we’d have to go and check. Meanwhile, here’s what really happened.
Northcode on Pick Your Poison: “What really, really, really pisses me off more than anything else in all of God’s creation is stupidity, followed closely…” May 8, 14:12
lothianlad on Pick Your Poison: “Anyone know roughly when the full results will be known?” May 8, 14:07
Northcode on Pick Your Poison: ““I didn’t Northcode…” What a fucking idiot!” May 8, 14:07
Geri on Pick Your Poison: “Aye, yer right, Sven. They’d only turn up, eat all the doughnuts & then declare everything was just fine &…” May 8, 13:52
Aidan on Pick Your Poison: “I didn’t Northcode – because I didn’t want to start with a predetermined answer and spend ages manipulating the computer…” May 8, 13:45
sarah on Pick Your Poison: “There’s no understanding folk. Shetland has gone SNP. Groan.” May 8, 13:28
factchecker on Pick Your Poison: “robertkknight – Good (and quite unusual) to see some rational and constructive analysis here. The vital requirement then becomes a…” May 8, 13:28
TURABDIN on Pick Your Poison: “PLEASE DO NOT DISDAIN «AI», the algorithm is a reflexion of its creator..RIRO. the Brits need to AI their voting…” May 8, 13:16
Northcode on Pick Your Poison: “You mean you didn’t? What a fucking idiot” May 8, 13:14
Geri on Pick Your Poison: “I’ll bet it cited a Yoon source for that bullshit. It’s full of contradiction. One minute we’re Scotland that helped…” May 8, 13:12
Sven on Pick Your Poison: “Geri @ 12.41. At the risk of(yet again) being called a tinfoil hat wearing conspiracy theorist, Ger, (I have been…” May 8, 13:10
Aidan on Pick Your Poison: “Or you just asked it a series of prompts or presented a set of scenarios until it gave you broadly…” May 8, 13:03
Northcode on Pick Your Poison: “Unlike you, AI Dan, my AI’s logic chip wasn’t programmed by devotees of English imperialism. And that being so, is…” May 8, 12:49
Geri on Pick Your Poison: “The rig is in: BBC reported earlier that they’re not allowed to film the count Glenrothes: “As we’ve been reporting,…” May 8, 12:41
Aidan on Pick Your Poison: “Whereas I asked it the straight up overarching question about Scotland’s role and we got: “Scotland played a disproportionately large…” May 8, 12:32
Northcode on Pick Your Poison: “Here’s some more from the AI that I made cry with my impeccable logic: Where this leaves your original argument…” May 8, 12:27
Mark Beggan on Pick Your Poison: “You are now arguing with yourself to prove yourself right.” May 8, 12:19
Confused on Pick Your Poison: “Right, seriously WTF was the need for the delay in the count? That stinks. Then, no exit poll? Now, they…” May 8, 12:17
robertkknight on Pick Your Poison: “Disagree. If you’ve a Scottish tax code then you should be able to vote in all local and national elections…” May 8, 12:17
Northcode on Pick Your Poison: “I’ve been arguing with an Artificial Intelligence. Ultimately, I said, “You say Scotland was both a partner in it [the…” May 8, 12:07
TURABDIN on Pick Your Poison: “SHORT CHANGE….what Scotland has had since 1603,,,,the date a king of Scots became king of England….all the rest is anglosaxon…” May 8, 12:00
Tenruh on Pick Your Poison: “Angus Robertson may have lost his seat but is on the list also, what chance has he of getting in…” May 8, 11:58
John. H. on Pick Your Poison: “The whole system needs to be changed. Scottish born people only should be allowed to vote in Scottish elections.it’s the…” May 8, 11:53
Alf Baird on Pick Your Poison: “Chances are later today there will be another what Peter Bell terms ‘nomimally’ pro-independence majority comprising SNP and Greens, plus…” May 8, 11:52
Geri on Pick Your Poison: “English students should be banned from voting in Scotland. Period. They get two votes I believe. One here & another…” May 8, 11:32
Northcode on Pick Your Poison: “Us Scots (Picts actually) are the most friendliest, most egalitarian, most sharing and caring fowk in the whole of this…” May 8, 11:23
Socrates MacSporran on Pick Your Poison: “Watching the BBC Shortbread election programme. Strange to see Bernard Ponsonby on BBC. He already has the line of the…” May 8, 11:17
Young Lochinvar on Pick Your Poison: “AI Dun and Fat Slag Wilma Flintstone “Love is in the air every sighting every sound”.. The dirty weekend you…” May 8, 11:14
Dan on Pick Your Poison: “Aye TH, there is undoubtably a feeling of “a them and us vibe” with many of the big name “Indy”…” May 8, 11:13