Actual Scottish politics news continues to be thinner on the ground than the crowds at a Donald Trump inauguration, so we sympathise once more with the gentle souls of the Scottish press as they endeavour to fill empty pages without doing anything more journalistically strenuous than slightly rewording a Labour or Tory press release.
Fortunately for us, of course, we’ve always got their dismal efforts to talk about.
I’ve always found that argument a bizarre one, firstly because it takes no account of people’s emotional attachments to either the UK or Scotland, and secondly because as this site has repeatedly pointed out Scotland is both a producer and consumer of hydrocarbon fuels, so low or high prices are neither an unalloyed good or an unalloyed bad thing for her citizens.
What is incontestable is that the revenue from 45 years of North Sea production has not been well managed by the United Kingdom in comparison to the other states who have benefited from this bounty.
So far so uncontentious.
Outside of constitutional questions, party politics in Scotland revolves around health, education and jobs, with every party more or less in favour of all three. But what if there was an existential threat not just to this trinity but to our entire way of life? Where would that fit in to our politics?
Judge Dredd: Origins was published in 2007, although in fact the basic story of how Bad Bob Booth became the last President of the USA and what he did next was established right back at the 1970s beginnings of Dredd’s parent comic 2000AD.
We actually have a theory that it’s all the Lib Dems’ fault.
Alert readers may recall as far back as July of last year, when we highlighted an odd thing that Scottish Labour branch manager Kezia Dugdale had started saying.
Regardless of the fact that it was total hooey, Dugdale repeated it every chance she got, and the inevitable Scottish-media consequences have duly followed.
You very rarely get useful stats about online newspaper readership, so we were quite intrigued by this snippet on tonight’s BBC2 Scotland documentary “Paper Thistle”, about the 200th anniversary of The Scotsman.
We don’t know what the numbers are or how brief the period was, but Wings’ average traffic is higher now than it was in 2014, while we suspect The Scotsman is moving in the opposite direction. For a single-issue website to be anywhere even in the same ballpark as a two-centuries-old broadsheet news brand with scores of full-time writers and production staff and a daily newsstand presence is a remarkable thing indeed.
We might start doing classifieds and sport just to see what happens.
It’s a well-known fact, of course, that 87% of all statistics are made up. But as this site regularly observes, if you’re the Scottish opposition and media there’s no need to invent fake ones when you can twist the real ones to present an image completely at odds with the reality.
The Sunday Times today has some fine examples of the craft of massaging figures for the purposes of deception. It carries two separate scare stories on the NHS, both of them using figures which aren’t based on any sort of news, but on opposition spin on existing stats. One comes from the Tories, under a dramatic headline:
The banner is pulling a classic trick – the £685m figure is actually the total sum spent in a decade, not the single year that most people would assume (since there’s no good reason to measure spending in decades, so headlines usually don’t do it). But remarkably it’s just about the most honest thing in the paper’s health coverage today.
While normally the Unionist media deploys the ever-reliable blunt sledgehammer in its tireless war against Scotland controlling its own affairs, it’s also occasionally capable of more subtlety, slipping in a sneaky stiletto of a lie in passing. Take this piece from today’s Mail On Sunday:
The thing is, that’s not how currency reserves work.
As we’ve always understood it, readers, the definition of “news” is supposed to be “a new thing which has happened that people didn’t previously know about”.
Evidently the rules have changed since we were young cub reporters.
We’ve never been all that convinced by the political strategy of parties angrily pointing out their rivals have supposedly broken their manifesto promises once in government. After all, since by definition the complaining party was very probably opposed to the policies in question, shouldn’t they be delighted if they haven’t been enacted?
It’s even weirder if the opposition was the REASON the policies didn’t get enacted. It’s incredibly bizarre to vote something down (as the Unionist parties did repeatedly to the SNP minority administration of 2007-11 when it brought its manifesto pledges forward), and then huff at the governing party for the fact that you outvoted them.
But today the Scottish Tories have found an intriguing new twist on the wheeze.
Insider on The Love Of Big Brother: “Indeed Jonathan ! I was astonished to see the prices supermarkets in England were charging for whisky last Christmas……A litre…” Oct 3, 22:56
Andy Wiltshire on The Love Of Big Brother: “They’ve long been trying, but it never seems to work.” Oct 3, 22:27
factchecker on The Love Of Big Brother: “At last – a professorial post based on fact. Please keep it up.” Oct 3, 21:54
factchecker on In The Eyes Of The Law: “Excellent post. Has a basis in fact. Please keep it up.” Oct 3, 21:44
Hatey McHateface on The Love Of Big Brother: ““Decolonization of course permits a liberated people to more fully develop” “The colonial status quo is never an option to…” Oct 3, 20:28
Alf Baird on The Love Of Big Brother: ““the post colonial boys never come up with any policies” What they do say is that “what they do with…” Oct 3, 20:11
McDuff on The Love Of Big Brother: “It seems to me that the SNP is determined to make its self unelectable.” Oct 3, 20:11
Hatey McHateface on The Love Of Big Brother: ““A colonised people are by implication subject to foreign ideology so long as they remain colonised” There you go, Alf,…” Oct 3, 19:43
Hatey McHateface on The Love Of Big Brother: “The UK illegal tobacco market is estimated at £5 billion to £6 billion PA. With the discrepancies shown above between…” Oct 3, 19:36
Alf Baird on The Love Of Big Brother: ““I don’t agree that this constitutes “foreign ideology”” A colonized people are by implication subject to foreign ideology so long…” Oct 3, 19:12
Captain Caveman on The Love Of Big Brother: “Yes, trademark lefty delight, schadenfreude and faux moral superiority, wielding puritanical, joy-sapping, virtue signalling woke “progressive” policies as though they…” Oct 3, 18:41
Spartan 117 on The Love Of Big Brother: ““There will be no curiosity, no enjoyment of the process of life. All competing pleasures will be destroyed. But always—…” Oct 3, 18:22
Northcode on The Love Of Big Brother: “I think it’s worth setting out what the Scottish Government’s proposed supermarket rules actually aim to achieve. Supermarkets have strong…” Oct 3, 18:21
Spartan 117 on The Love Of Big Brother: “More proof we are ruled by Authoritarian Communists, as if any further was needed.” Oct 3, 18:18
Captain Caveman on The Love Of Big Brother: “*righting any wrongs, even. (Duh)” Oct 3, 18:04
Captain Caveman on The Love Of Big Brother: “@GM I don’t agree that this constitutes “foreign ideology” – the likes of the SNP have wholeheartedly made it their…” Oct 3, 17:54
gm on The Love Of Big Brother: “Holyrood is a colonial administrative device. I agree with that. it is hardly surprising that they steal their wages and…” Oct 3, 17:29
Northcode on In The Eyes Of The Law: “In case it wasn’t clear in my last post, a judicial review can only look at whether the decision-making process…” Oct 3, 17:15
Captain Caveman on The Love Of Big Brother: “There really is no end to your grievance chimpery, is there? I mean, it couldn’t possibly be that the SNP…” Oct 3, 17:06
Alf Baird on The Love Of Big Brother: ““Holyrood, is not a place where policy is developed, debated and legislated on in response to public demand for reasons…” Oct 3, 16:35
Jonathan Offal on The Love Of Big Brother: “It’s worth noting that the “Alcohol tax” isn’t a tax. None of the money goes to the public, to alcohol…” Oct 3, 15:48
GM on The Love Of Big Brother: “There will be an element of that nae doot For example, there is plenty evidence that some in Holyrood and…” Oct 3, 15:44
Bill Cowan on The Love Of Big Brother: “The thing is, with the minimum price on alcohol and the massive discrepancies in price between England and Scotland, it…” Oct 3, 15:39
dearieme on The Love Of Big Brother: ““Utterly fascist in nature”: I don’t think so – I don’t remember allegations that Benito was a nutritionist nut. But…” Oct 3, 15:31
Patsy Millar on The Love Of Big Brother: “I think our government is now treating ‘1984’ as an instructional document!” Oct 3, 14:51
willie on The Love Of Big Brother: “Nutzlose Esser and Lebensunwertes Leben. The next policies for this utterly fascist government. Tried before, will be tried again!” Oct 3, 14:39
willie on The Love Of Big Brother: “Utterly fascist in nature and it begs the absolute question as to what right, and by what authority these scum…” Oct 3, 14:35
Alf Baird on The Love Of Big Brother: “You can buy 3 ferries for the price of 1, but such practices are banned in SNP la la land:…” Oct 3, 14:20
Captain Caveman on The Love Of Big Brother: “I don’t really buy that line of argument. Matters of personal efficiency, effectiveness, productivity and usefulness all seem like very…” Oct 3, 14:19
100%Yes on The Love Of Big Brother: “The SNP has no ideas and because of this we are suffering.” Oct 3, 14:17