We’ve got a shock result for the inaugural winner of this exciting new award, readers. Remarkably it’s NOT David Torrance – who wrote an arch review of a chapter of a book about Donald Trump that didn’t actually exist. Good effort, Davey, but no cigar.
No, the first ever Wings Absolute Fanny Of The Week is… Anas Sarwar!
In common with half of Scottish Labour, Sarwar has been raging at Paisley MP Mhairi Black for her “silence” over the closure of a 16-bed children’s ward in the town, which has been replaced by an entire new state-of-the-art 256-bed children’s hospital 10 minutes down the road, right next to the sparkly new Southern General.
But only Sarwar did it by enclosing a picture of the local paper’s front-page splash on the story. In which there was one teeny-weeny slight problem for him.
Remarkably, the notoriously unreliable and yet somehow omnipresent Scottish political commentator and reality-disputer David “Davey” Torrance was still digging last night in the wake of this story from three days ago.
Previous episodes in the series are here. If you’ve got a story like this to tell, or you know anyone who does, Phantom Power want to hear from you – drop them a line.
Late last night in the House Of Commons saw one of the most significant votes in the history of UK constitutional politics. A group of Scottish Tory MPs voted to oppose an amendment which would have protected the central building block of Scottish (and Welsh) devolution – the principle that any powers not explicitly reserved are devolved – from the UK government’s attempted huge power grab under the cover of Brexit.
Last night they could have fixed it by supporting the amendment (backed by every other Scottish MP right across party lines), which would have tipped the arithmetic and ensured its success. Instead they betrayed every voter in Scotland – including their own – by waving the bill through unamended and passing the buck to the unelected House Of Lords, which has no representatives from Scotland’s most popular party.
This morning, BBC Scotland led on the fact that it snowed a bit in Scotland in January.
It also saw the return of ubiquitous Scottish politics scribe David Torrance from a trip to San Francisco, the details of which he shared at stultifying length with the unfortunate readers of The Scottish Review.
Or at least, what he SAID were the details of where he SAID he’d been.
We’ve commented quite a few times in recent months about the Scottish media’s habit of running statistical stories rendered meaningless by the absence of any context.
The reasons for this aren’t necessarily sinister – sometimes journalists are just lazy or the full stats are hard to establish because like-for-like figures aren’t published – but usually it’s just a way to get an SNP BAD story out of isolated numbers which, if the full picture was presented, would render that impossible.
The above story from STV News today contains no furious rentaquotes from Labour or the Tories (at least not yet), so we should place it in the former category. Nevertheless, we do feel it’s our duty in a general sense to provide readers with the information that the Scottish media can’t be bothered to, so let’s do that.
An alert reader this weekend linked us to a 1963 speech by the famed American civil rights and racial equality campaigner Malcolm X.
We’d never heard of it before, which is probably to our shame, but as we read it we were overcome by an inexplicable sense of incredible familiarity.
We present it to you below for your interest, without further comment or editing, but we’ve included a few pictures just to break up the block of text.
Ruth Davidson appeared on Good Morning Scotland today as part of their series of interviews with what they call “the leaders of the larger parties in Scotland”, which for some reason is also including the Lib Dems and Greens.
You can listen to the piece – which showcased the usual evasive, time-killing waffle technique Davidson employs as standard, noticeably uncomfortable only when Gary Robertson pressed her on welfare-cuts suicides – for yourself if you want, but in our Panelbase poll last month we discovered a difference between Davidson and Nicola Sturgeon we thought was quite interesting, so we’re going to talk about that instead.
Angus on A Matter Of Declinature: “Police refusing to investigate a massive known crime in a civilised state can be because of one of the following…” Jul 16, 04:03
Cynicus on A Matter Of Declinature: “I know what “qwerty” means, and I know what “captured” means. But the phrase “qwerty captured “ baffles me. AND…” Jul 16, 01:22
Cynicus on The Invisible Rabbit: “Amen to that. Don’t stay away too long again, Breeks.” Jul 16, 01:08
Young Lochinvar on The Invisible Rabbit: “HMcH Errrrrrrr.. That’s a No. Please accept my explanation that it no way infers respect or conviviality! PS: anyways remember…” Jul 16, 00:11
Hatey McHateface on Blue In The Face: “Scottish voters were denied their right to an Independent Scotland because not enough Scottish voters turned out to vote for…” Jul 16, 00:01
Young Lochinvar on A Matter Of Declinature: “DB Qwerty = (top line of a keyboard) is a kind of shorthand for LGBTQIgodknows what else gobbledegook gibberish freakery..…” Jul 15, 23:55
Hatey McHateface on The Invisible Rabbit: “Well, Breeks, I note you’re still of the opinion that former colonies should roll over and accept forced re-colonisation by…” Jul 15, 23:38
Hatey McHateface on The Invisible Rabbit: “Aw, YL. I’m touched to discover you’re thinking of me. I guess there’s absolutely no point in asking you to…” Jul 15, 23:30
James on The Invisible Rabbit: “Long time no see, Breeks. Best to you.” Jul 15, 23:26
Graf Midgehunter on A Matter Of Declinature: “Viagra. Take two and be a world champ” Jul 15, 23:20
Skip_NC on A Matter Of Declinature: “The assorted has-beens and never-will-bes on the BBC are blaming Tuchel and it’s not just because he went defensive very…” Jul 15, 23:18
robertkknight on A Matter Of Declinature: “Either that, or the supine media have been served DSMA-Notices and are avoiding mentioning the elephant in the room in…” Jul 15, 23:10
Captain Caveman on A Matter Of Declinature: “No one is blaming the manager, although his subs were crap. We scored a great goal with 30 minutes to…” Jul 15, 22:56
Young Lochinvar on A Matter Of Declinature: “Viagra.. For when you can’t make it past a semi.. PS; Its just a game 🙂” Jul 15, 22:43
Andy Wiltshire on A Matter Of Declinature: “Great stuff – you can almost imagine the rising panic as they read it. Squeaky bum time!” Jul 15, 22:36
Confused on A Matter Of Declinature: “INGLUND have “HEARTS-ED IT” LAVVERLY JABBLY – now let’s play : BLAME THE MANAGER ‘es a bit forun innee ……” Jul 15, 22:25
Andrew scott on A Matter Of Declinature: “YAH BEAUTY Btw how come that horror who “works” for Aberdeen uni is still in a job after HIS terrible(now…” Jul 15, 21:53
Oneliner on A Matter Of Declinature: “Indeed. Prior to his resignation, Healy was the last Defence Secretary to call out the SNP as being ‘a threat…” Jul 15, 21:13
robertkknight on A Matter Of Declinature: “The more they (Police Scotland/COPFS) squirm the more it smacks of someone in Thames House playing the National Security card…” Jul 15, 20:36
Carol Neill on A Matter Of Declinature: “Dug wi a bone , wish we had more of you” Jul 15, 20:13
Aidan on A Matter Of Declinature: “@RevStu – has anyone initiated the victims right to review with respect to the original complaint? I’ve no doubt that…” Jul 15, 19:51
diabloandco on A Matter Of Declinature: “Young Lochinvar, sorry you lost me with your comment , can you explain – I know being old restricts my…” Jul 15, 19:33
Mark Beggan on A Matter Of Declinature: “Qwertys days are numbered. Just like that mentally unstable transvestite who calls himself Confused.” Jul 15, 19:22
100%Yes on The Invisible Rabbit: “We should protest outside Holyrood or Bute house demanding Swinney is removed from office and investigated.” Jul 15, 18:56
100%Yes on The Invisible Rabbit: “We shout protest outside Holyrood or Bute house demanding Swinney is removed from office and investigated.” Jul 15, 18:56
100%Yes on The Invisible Rabbit: “I have been arguing since 2015 on here about the SNP and Sturgeon true commitment to Independence being Nil. Its…” Jul 15, 18:25
Young Lochinvar on A Matter Of Declinature: “Talking of lawyers letters I see JK Rowling has made qwerty captured Amnesty back down after putting out a qwerty…” Jul 15, 18:12
Jeannie McCrimmon on A Matter Of Declinature: “Under your instructions. That ? was a wee emoji.” Jul 15, 18:08