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Archive for the ‘wtf’


Burning down the house 138

Posted on February 04, 2021 by

In a surprise development, we made Pete Wishart happy today.

And not just him.

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Beyond comedy 272

Posted on February 04, 2021 by

At a certain point you just have to laugh, even though it’s not really funny.

The submission being referred to is NOT the one Alex Salmond sent to the Holyrood committee this week, but the one he sent to the separate Hamilton inquiry almost a month ago, which had been cleared by his lawyers and was published in full by both Wings and The Spectator and read by tens, if not hundreds, of thousands of people.

(For reasons we’re not allowed to tell you, the Wings version has been totally redacted and the Spectator’s has had one paragraph removed but is still mostly intact.)

Because the Fabiani inquiry won’t be publishing the document, that means Salmond isn’t allowed to discuss it when he gives oral evidence, and the inquiry isn’t permitted to consider any of its contents, just as with Geoff Aberdein’s submission.

(There’s very little Salmond actually WILL now be allowed to talk about if he appears before the committee. He might just about be able to confirm his name before the Lord Advocate has him arrested and charged with whatever the opposite of perjury is.)

In other words, the exact people who are supposed to be getting to the bottom of what happened are the only people in Scotland who have to pretend they haven’t read the evidence of the primary witness. (While also not being allowed to see the evidence of the other most important witness, or almost anything else.)

You really would struggle to make this stuff up, readers.

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SNP In Arsonophobia Shame 228

Posted on February 02, 2021 by

Readers, we swear to you we are not making this up. What you’re about to read are genuine extracts from the SNP’s official new (probably illegal) Equalities Mechanism explanatory note, detailing what does and doesn’t count as a disability when it comes to jumping the queue for a regional list nomination.

And straight away it’s a real punch in the gut for firestarters, muggers, rapists, flashers and, in most cases, hay-fever sufferers. THIS BIGOTRY WILL NOT STAND.

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A criminal state 184

Posted on February 01, 2021 by

Evidently the SNP didn’t think they looked bad enough already today.

Or more likely, they just wanted to try to bury all of their skeletons at once in a single giant avalanche of crookedness. But either way, enough is enough. Criminals accused of perjury don’t get to decide if they’ll answer for their lies or not.

The Fabiani committee has the power to compel witnesses to attend. They must now use that power without further delay, or they must call on the police to arrest the SNP’s chief executive immediately and drag him into an interview room by his ears if need be with a solicitor in attendance. (Doubtless also paid for by SNP members.)

Scotland is not GoodFellas. Nobody is above the law. Stop this damn rot now.

The Final Curtain 76

Posted on January 10, 2021 by

Sorry, America 99

Posted on January 06, 2021 by

So here’s how long it took for Scottish transactivists to make the scenes in Washington DC tonight all about (1) them, and (2) me:

These people be crazy.

Deadpan Of The Year 2021 92

Posted on January 05, 2021 by

We know that the 5th of January is unusually early to be giving out annual awards, but this is going to be pretty much impossible to beat, so God bless the P&J for giving us all a chuckle in these dark times.

Let’s just quickly check on that “expert”.

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All Vegetarians Are Nazis 196

Posted on December 30, 2020 by

Because 2020 is the maddest year in history, Ruth Davidson opened her contribution to Holyrood’s debate on the Brexit deal today with a lengthy quote from this website.

Because hey, why NOT, right?

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Mr Peter Murrell: a correction 174

Posted on December 14, 2020 by

On 8 December this site ran an article about the Chief Executive Officer of the Scottish National Party, Peter Murrell. It has recently been drawn to our attention that the piece contained a serious inaccuracy, which we would like to remedy.

Because as it turns out, Peter Murrell IS a liar.

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The Whining Of The Bams 51

Posted on December 06, 2020 by

These people are deranged. That is all

(Pictured: Guy Ingerson, yesterday.)

The team player 258

Posted on December 02, 2020 by

If you don’t have the time to read Alyn Smith’s astonishing response to the SNP NEC election results in today’s National, we’ve edited it down to 10 seconds for you.

If you’re in no rush, read on.

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The Worst People In Scotland 124

Posted on November 27, 2020 by

In case anyone was looking for a list:

One’s just turned up.

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    • Iain More on The Marshalling Plan: “I cant stop laughing at events, my ribs are cracking due to laughing so much. I cant get over how…Feb 5, 04:04
    • Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on The Marshalling Plan: “« Thit a shúil ar bharr tí in aice leis an gcairéal. Cosúil le splanc tintrí osclaíodh na fuinneoga ann,…Feb 5, 00:34
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