Look, we know. But there’s no news. Check out the state of it.
“KEYBOARD PLAYER ALLEGEDLY GOT FAT-SHAMED AT SOME UNSPECIFIED POINT IN TIME BY FOURTH-DIVISION BAND WHO LAST HAD A TOP 40 SINGLE IN 2006“ and “CYCLIST GOES TO TOILET”. Front pages.
(The keyboard player now works for SNP pie-disposal unit Anne McLaughlin, ironically, which seems to be the closest relationship the story has with current affairs. But hey, kudos to the Record for beating all the other papers to that “exclusive”.)
We remain alert. If anything remotely worthwhile happens, we’ll be on it.
The reality-TV let’s say “personality” Kelly Given – who Wings readers previously met on a trip to New York for Tartan Week with a raft of SNP let’s say “celebrities” a couple of months ago – has been off on another nice holiday.
Last night she told both the viewers of BBC Scotland’s “Seven Days” that she’d just spent three weeks on an island in Greece, where apparently she was quite shocked to discover that the Mediterranean nation was hot in July.
As far as we’re aware, LGBT Youth Scotland remains under police investigation for the suspected grooming and sexual exploitation of children. It’s impossible to imagine any other sort of organisation that could still expect to enjoy the patronage of a First Minister under such circumstances – especially when there were obvious other places he could be reasonably expected to show his face – but that’s how the SNP’s priorities roll in 2023 and there’s no getting away from it.
For any question to do with independence, folks, Humza Yousaf is not the answer.
Wings readers are of course the last people in the country who need any reminding of what a ditch-slithering creature Scottish Labour activist Duncan Hothersall is. And in truth by his standards these tweets are only about averagely despicable.
At least, we assume there was a sizeable current being passed through it, as little else could explain the visibly uncomfortable half-hour experienced by hapless Stonewall chair Iain Anderson with Beth Rigby last night, or the seemingly random changes every few seconds in his facial expressions, body language and accent.
(Just about the only constant, other than his sweating top lip, was the deeply irritating modern phenomenon of stupid people starting every sentence with the word “So…”.)
If you’re a connoisseur of vacuous, nervous awkwardness you’re in for a real treat. If you want to see a human being actually answering any questions with even the tiniest shred of coherence, pertinence or honesty, maybe give it a miss.
Even not-very-alert readers will have noticed that we’re taking a little summer holiday in the complete absence of any political events. Rest assured that we’re using the time to patrol Bath diligently for bears. But we couldn’t help noticing this on Twitter today.
Someone tweeted it to show that as late as summer 2020 the SNP was still soliciting money for what it called its “ring fenced Independence Referendum Campaign Fund”.
And the rest of it doesn’t pull many punches either. Let’s hope it’s just the first crack in the dam. The opportunity for the others in the party to find their courage is fast ebbing away, and history will be unmerciful if they don’t seize it.
Just for a change, let’s have a Friday-night competition!
Sharp-eyed readers will have noticed that former First Minister Alex Salmond is staging a show in the Spiegeltent at the Edinburgh Fringe next month, from 4-13 August.
You may even have seen a bit of online criticism from certain po-faced pseudonats about the fact that Salmond is sharing a platform with – gasp! – a Yoon, in the shape of the “last of the traditional Tories”, David Davis MP.
It is our solemn duty to inform readers that deranged, shovel-handed Scottish Greens member and known associate of rapists and paedophiles Scott “Heather” Herbert has taken the hump at a Wings article from yesterday in which he was satirically featured.
He filed a malicious false copyright claim with YouTube which resulted in a silent video clip from the article showcasing his comically gigantic man-hands being scheduled for deletion, despite Herbert owning no copyright in the video (it’s the property of TalkTV, who have raised no objections to it) and having no legal standing to file any complaint.
But YouTube’s abysmal automated structures operate on the basis that all complaints are intrinsically valid, and allow absolutely no way for Wings to appeal this decision.
Spartan 117 on Faces In Sand: “I doubt anybody in the M25 omniclusterfuckpermashambles-on-Thames is paying any attention to the UN capers (all of which is just…” Oct 26, 13:41
Spartan 117 on Faces In Sand: “Pished, hysterical, incoherent rambling as per.” Oct 26, 13:31
Captain Caveman on Faces In Sand: “Yes, the “useful idiot” argument (from a Unionist POV) isn’t lost on me. 🙂 However, it is bloody tedious, isn’t…” Oct 26, 13:25
Aidan on Faces In Sand: “I think Confused is having a tougher time as an adult. I would guess passing the days drinking very strong,…” Oct 26, 13:24
Aidan on Faces In Sand: “It has a practical purpose in driving the cause of independence down a dead end and diverting time and resources,…” Oct 26, 13:18
Captain Caveman on Faces In Sand: “I’m guessing you had a tough time at school, Confused, and were no stranger to the “bogwash”.” Oct 26, 12:40
Confused on Faces In Sand: “getting into the english at the UN is useful, and enjoyable, because it “hits them where they live” – they…” Oct 26, 12:17
Confused on Faces In Sand: ““Rewilding” is another con job – what it means is : GET ORFF MOI LAND – and whenever an ANGLO…” Oct 26, 12:14
Lorncal on Faces In Sand: “Northcode: although contemporary international law would back us up in most areas, the Treaty will almost certainly come into play…” Oct 26, 11:30
Spartan 117 on Faces In Sand: “Alf, but the UK *does* exist, legally, politically and physically, not just within its territory but it is internationally recognised.…” Oct 26, 10:55
Northcode on Faces In Sand: “I understand the frustration — democratic systems are imperfect everywhere. But my point was simply that, unlike in 1707, Scots…” Oct 26, 10:24
Captain Caveman on Faces In Sand: “Hey, it’s almost as though this “ancient guff” that happened over 300 years ago is of no pragmatic consequence in…” Oct 26, 10:14
Captain Caveman on Faces In Sand: “So it’s a case of “Schrödinger’s Union” then, eh Alf? 😀” Oct 26, 10:08
Willie on Faces In Sand: “Morning Northcode, ” In 1707, ordinary people weren’t given a choice. Across Europe, citizens had no democratic say in major…” Oct 26, 10:02
Marie on Faces In Sand: “You forgot Palestine and Arthur James Balfour, 1st Earl of Balfour, born in East Lothian.” Oct 26, 09:53
Alf Baird on Faces In Sand: “You can’t end something that never existed in the first place, Northcode.” Oct 26, 09:18
Northcode on Faces In Sand: “The confusion begins with the name. “Treaty of Union” suggests an equal partnership, but the institutional reality created in 1707…” Oct 26, 08:59
Northcode on Faces In Sand: “Hatey — that’s a very clear way of putting it. The distinction between wanting to end the Union and pretending…” Oct 26, 08:53
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: ““the White House will be adorned by a downright moron” Haha, Scotland leads the world! We’ve already had a string…” Oct 26, 08:29
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: ““That there was colonialism of Northern Ireland was an idea widely considered by many groups and individuals” That it was…” Oct 26, 08:11
TURABDIN on Faces In Sand: “«As democracy is perfected, the office of the president represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people.…” Oct 26, 08:04
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: ““those such as yersel who maintain that a UK ‘union’ exists when it becomes ever more evident that it does…” Oct 26, 08:04
Willie on Faces In Sand: “The repeated euphemism of the word ” the Troubles ‘ is a masterpiece of spin to mask the reality of…” Oct 26, 08:00
Alf Baird on Faces In Sand: ““..dismantle a political and economic union that he claims doesn’t exist” The problem surely lies with those such as yersel…” Oct 25, 22:36
sarah on Faces In Sand: “Dan, thanks for the info on trees. I brought the chestnut tree up from Kent as a sprout 25 years…” Oct 25, 21:56
Lorncal on Faces In Sand: “I absolutely agree, Northcode, that we need to make a powerful case for independence across the board, but, after an…” Oct 25, 20:52
Dan on Faces In Sand: “@ Sarah They are not my Hazel or Sweet Chestnut trees. They are just planted locally along a roadside. I’m…” Oct 25, 20:31
sam on Faces In Sand: “That there was colonialism of Northern Ireland was an idea widely considered by many groups and individuals during what is…” Oct 25, 20:12
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: “Wheesht, Xaracen! Dinna tell the Picts we Scots stole most of the country from. Got to say, it does seem…” Oct 25, 19:44
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: “My benchmark 30 seconds of internet research reveals the budget of BBC Scotland TV to be £42 million PA. The…” Oct 25, 19:36
