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A different kind of beat 105

Posted on November 22, 2018 by

So this was in the Times football section today:

And you find yourself thinking, “Well gee, why might THAT be, Alex?”

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Britain really is this stupid 136

Posted on November 21, 2018 by

And we’re sure these guys are at least partly to blame.

The dust of the sawdust 269

Posted on November 20, 2018 by

We’re so far beyond mere “scraping the barrel” now.

Unhappy with polls based on asking the simple and clear question “Should Scotland be an independent country?”, and which have been stubbornly refusing to show any movement against independence, our dear old pals at Scotland In Union recently commissioned one of their own seeking to muddy the waters.

Their brainwave was to try to confuse respondents by tangling up the usual indyref responses (firmly and consistently set in people’s minds over the last seven years as “Yes” and “No”) with the responses associated with the EU referendum (“Remain” and “Leave”), in the hope that Scots – who of course are heavily in favour of Remain – would be fooled and/or brainwashed into saying something different.

And it very very slightly worked, right up to the point where it fell apart.

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The staunch defenders 281

Posted on November 19, 2018 by

If we were to write an article every time Murdo Fraser said something moronic, we’d have to rename this site Wings Over Murdo Fraser, and drink an awful lot of Red Bull to be able to cover it all.

Stuff like this, for example, is almost too easy.

43% (actually 45.3% excluding Don’t Knows) is considerably more than Murdo Fraser has ever achieved in an election, either himself or as part of a party. His average over the seven elections he’s contested and lost since 1999 is just 30.1%, and until a blip in 2016 it had been falling lower and lower each time, as people have watched how he performed as an MSP and got less and less keen on the idea.

That’s still actually slightly more than the 28.6% his party secured in Scotland at the last election, though, in what was nevertheless generally regarded as an unusually impressive performance. Two years earlier they gathered just 14.9% of the votes cast.

Yet neither Fraser nor the Tories disappear for a generation every time Scotland tells them to go and get stuffed. Fraser keeps trousering an MSP’s fat salary despite two decades of unbroken and unequivocal personal rejection from the electorate, even as he demands that the independence movement gives up after losing ONE vote.

But in his defence, his leader’s not setting him much of an example.

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Waiting for the penny to drop 96

Posted on November 19, 2018 by

This is the best one of these we’ve ever seen.

Nobody tell him, now. Imagine the moment when he spots it for himself.

The armchair terrorists 456

Posted on November 17, 2018 by

This is the editorial in today’s Scottish edition of The Times:

It seems to be an increasingly popular viewpoint in the country’s media.

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Unionist Blackjack 106

Posted on November 17, 2018 by

The threatened member 136

Posted on November 16, 2018 by

Ah, remember these simpler times, readers?

Thank goodness for etc etc.

Theresa May’s Crack Team 242

Posted on November 14, 2018 by

…is what they’re calling Jack and James now, we hear.

Draw your own conclusions about the word “crack” there.

Serving the nations 188

Posted on November 14, 2018 by

Ever aware of its need to deliver informed enlightenment to the populace, the state broadcaster has recently put up a “BBC Brexit Jargon Buster” page on its website. We’re not sure it was meant to be quite this candid.

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The whistleblower 432

Posted on November 12, 2018 by

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When they think we’re not listening 405

Posted on November 11, 2018 by

This piece ran in the Telegraph – a newspaper with no Scottish edition and almost no Scottish sales – on Friday. Click to enlarge.

Our favourite line is:

“Think of what the UK would be like without the vast wealth generated by the 44bn barrels of oil pumped from British territory over the last 40 years.”

(Curiously, this is a rather different line to the one Critchlow took during the indyref, when he was the Telegraph’s full-time business news editor penning a string of articles about how bankrupt an independent Scotland would be despite possessing an asset that’s now apparently big enough to prop up an economy 12 times Scotland’s size.)

It’s worth keeping in mind whenever Unionists tell us (a) how volatile and worthless and used-up oil is, (b) how much Scotland depends on the kind benevolence of the UK to survive, and (c) why we can’t have another referendum until years after Brexit.

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    • Rev. Stuart Campbell on The Slowest Dawning: “That IS peculiar.Aug 28, 18:59
    • Mark Beggan on The Slowest Dawning: “Brilliantly put Rev. It’s the Woke Jihad.Aug 28, 18:42
    • Captain Caveman on Spot The Problem: “Well, I’m sure we’re all devastated, Fatso. (“LOL” – definitely at you pal).Aug 28, 18:35
    • 100%Yes on The Slowest Dawning: “Just in at The National, “SNP Westminster leader U-turns after opening door to indyref deal with Nigel Farage” I have…Aug 28, 18:17
    • Karen on The Slowest Dawning: “What jumped out at me was “15. [Making the case] … over time, well ahead of any future referendum campaign”.…Aug 28, 18:16
    • 100%Yes on The Slowest Dawning: “The National doesn’t make good reading for people wanting Independence or the SNP membership. It states “SNP members’ fury as…Aug 28, 18:14
    • James on The Slowest Dawning: “Or just don’t bother. Would suit most.Aug 28, 18:13
    • James on The Slowest Dawning: “LOL.Aug 28, 18:12
    • 100%Yes on The Slowest Dawning: “Certain people actually believe ATLS is the party you should now vote for, NAW they ain’t. They have been actively…Aug 28, 18:09
    • James on Spot The Problem: “LOL. [at you, not with you].Aug 28, 18:09
    • viscount ennui on The Slowest Dawning: “SNP supporters v Christians “So do you actually believe that an angel impregnated Mary to produce JC?” “Well, obviously no.…Aug 28, 18:03
    • 100%Yes on The Slowest Dawning: “The National doesn’t make good reading for people wanting Independence or the SNP membership. It states “SNP members’ fury as…Aug 28, 18:00
    • Spartan 117 on The Slowest Dawning: “Worse than that, Honest John and his cronies want to offshore and outsource democracy to the undemocratic EU and turn…Aug 28, 17:53
    • agentx on The Slowest Dawning: “I’ll wait for James Che’s in depth analysis and Alf’s quotes before passing judgement!Aug 28, 17:46
    • Spartan 117 on The Slowest Dawning: “Last time round, I found the argument put forward for independence inadequate and lacking in key details, just as the…Aug 28, 17:46
    • Aidan on Spot The Problem: “It’s all true CC, but it’s alright James can put a tin foil hat on his oversized head to protect…Aug 28, 17:45
    • 100%Yes on The Slowest Dawning: “What attracted my attention was the elephant in the room “59. abolish The Scotland Office”. What ever the UK PM…Aug 28, 17:38
    • GeoffC on The Slowest Dawning: “They’ve missed out support for Gaza, a favourite topic of The National.Aug 28, 17:33
    • James on The Slowest Dawning: “LOL.Aug 28, 17:29
    • Gav on The Slowest Dawning: “The Wee Blue Book is the gold standard in getting reliable, fully-sourced information out there in a format that supports…Aug 28, 17:23
    • ScottieDog on The Slowest Dawning: “When in difficulty, there’s always the civilian branch – Believe In Scotland to get the (non-jingling) collection tins goingAug 28, 17:15
    • Willie on The Slowest Dawning: “Absolutely yes, bang on Fheargas. The SNP exists now purely to stymie independence. That’s is exactly what its handlers in…Aug 28, 17:13
    • Willie on The Slowest Dawning: “Absolutely yes, bang on Fheargas. The SNP exists now purely to stymie independence. That’s is exactly what its handlers in…Aug 28, 17:05
    • robertkknight on The Slowest Dawning: “None so blind as SNP members who will not see. Apart of course from the gender Woo-Woo and Wokerati carpetbaggers,…Aug 28, 16:49
    • Jim Thomson on The Slowest Dawning: “Right at the top of your post you point out that anyone disagreeing with the general direction of the party…Aug 28, 16:28
    • Captain Caveman on Spot The Problem: “Well, we all know you haven’t, Fatty. Unless you call a park bench “air conditioned”.Aug 28, 16:26
    • Ian Smith on The Slowest Dawning: “Will conference discuss the big thing that happened a few months back, or show any interest in who was responsible…Aug 28, 16:25
    • Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on The Slowest Dawning: “The SNP is not a failure. I have no doubt the SNP is fully achieving what it’s dark handlers wish…Aug 28, 16:23
    • James on Spot The Problem: “Ah; Pricks 2 & 3, right on cue as booked. Got air con in there, girls?Aug 28, 15:45
    • Captain Caveman on Spot The Problem: “I think you’re forgetting the undoubted malign influence of 5G phone masts and flu vaccines, Aidan, not to mention “Humphrey…Aug 28, 15:31
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