Yeah, we know we said we weren’t going to say anything else about the COVID-19 crisis, but sometimes there’s just too much stupid going around to stay silent.
A disturbing number of people appear to have interpreted the undoubted seriousness of the pandemic to mean that nobody is ever allowed to be even slightly happy for the briefest of moments until it’s all over.
As a result, while half the country is full of people just trying to cope as best they can while acting sensibly and responsibly within both the letter and spirit of the emergency restrictions, the other half has elected itself officers of the Lockdown Gestapo, pointing fingers and shrieking at anyone deemed not to be miserable enough.
It will come as little surprise to any observer of the Scottish media for the last decade that the trial of Alex Salmond is to continue indefinitely after the actual court case that cleared him of all charges.
With very occasional honourable exceptions, including some from rather unexpected sources, the Scottish press has been – even by its own spectacularly low standards – an absolute sewer for the past week. Wings has taken the decision not to link to any of the most disgusting articles, even as archives, because frankly in the current stressful situation none of us needs any extra poison in our headspace.
Scotland’s political journalists have been unable to contain their seething fury at being robbed of the head on a pike that they were all expecting and salivating about like Pavlov’s dogs. But scumbags are gonna scumbag, and that’s not news. What’s far more alarming is something in today’s papers that they didn’t write.
This article is the only thing Wings is going to say about the COVID-19 crisis, because (a) we’re on holiday, (b) it has very little to do with Scottish politics, and (c) we’re not virologists and have no expertise to offer.
But in so far as we have some sort of reach and to some extent people listen to us, and we don’t want any of you to die, here’s a small plea for all our sakes.
Today a mostly-female jury drawn from the most Unionist city in Scotland and directed by a female judge delivered the only verdict it was credibly possible to reach on the (total absence of) evidence before it: that Alex Salmond was not guilty of any crime.
After two weeks hearing an assortment of lurid allegations from former friends and colleagues hidden behind cloaks of public anonymity, the jury – having been advised by the prosecuting counsel that they were the sole arbiters of fact – decided that there was no truth to them.
Since the two most serious charges, in particular, were both matters of the accuser’s word against that of the accused, and the two parties gave completely irreconcilable accounts of the facts (rather than competing interpretations of agreed events), it can only be the case that one side was lying absolutely, and the jury decided that it was the anonymous accusers who were doing so.
It remains to see whether there will be a legal reckoning for those lies. But more than one sort of reckoning will surely follow from these events.
Aidan on The Nobodies: “Now that the approach to the UN has failed and been rejected, does that mean therefore that there is no…” Jul 28, 11:55
Captain Caveman on The Nobodies: “You’re trying to tell me things that are painfully obvious (and in keeping with what I myself have been saying…” Jul 28, 11:48
Captain Caveman on The Nobodies: ““Burnham Bounce” “Labour +1%” If that’s a “bounce”, Sam, I’ve got a bridge to sell you. 😀 Well within statistical…” Jul 28, 11:32
Alf Baird on The Nobodies: ““save for the moribund issue of the constitution” Its clear as day (except to colonialists it seems) that Swinney does…” Jul 28, 11:24
sam on The Nobodies: “While Scottish Labour elects another useless leader, there is a Burnham bounce for now. “Voting intention, 26-27 July 2026: Ref…” Jul 28, 11:11
Captain Caveman on The Nobodies: “Totally agree, Mincehead, red and blue rosettes both. Mind, I think most would agree that incomers hailing from Eastern Europe…” Jul 28, 10:42
Minceheid on The Nobodies: “Captain Caveman says: 28 July, 2026 at 10:02 am The product of years of counter-reality, supremely naïve, black-is-white doublethink politics…” Jul 28, 10:34
Captain Caveman on The Nobodies: “I admit nothing of the sort, Alf. As Stu notes in his piece (assume you read it, emphasis added): ‘……” Jul 28, 10:33
Alf Baird on The Nobodies: ““comparing the SNP to Labour is akin to looking at two near identical turds” So you finally admit that the…” Jul 28, 10:14
Captain Caveman on The Nobodies: “The product of years of counter-reality, supremely naïve, black-is-white doublethink politics of the Left forced down our collective throats has…” Jul 28, 10:02
Hatey McHateface on The Nobodies: “Hmmm. Yet I keep reading reports that across Europe, support for what the MSM likes to call the “far right”…” Jul 28, 09:41
James Che on The Nobodies: “Small in- fights To distract and hide behind from the bigger picture of collapsing GB, Every diversion has been used…” Jul 28, 09:32
James Che on The Nobodies: “The political union of blue labour and red tories , right being left and left being the end game, To…” Jul 28, 09:20
Hatey McHateface on The Nobodies: “You’re right, sam. Must be my time of the month.” Jul 28, 09:06
Captain Caveman on The Nobodies: “The conclusion to be drawn, I think, is just how utterly spent, moribund and bereft the political Left is. As…” Jul 28, 09:06
James Che on Ain’t it funny how things change?: “Covid lockdowns and yet allowing migration access to continue with limited health intervention under Covid Tories management, Labour, the tool…” Jul 28, 08:57
sam on The Nobodies: ““Hatey McHateface says: 27 July, 2026 at 8:03 pm I think any politician who could fix period poverty will find…” Jul 28, 08:42
Hatey McHateface on The Nobodies: “A man with the courage of his convictions then. Respect. After all, if the Treaty of Union does not exist,…” Jul 28, 08:19
twathater on Ain’t it funny how things change?: “Unfortunately when governments and politicians IGNORE the wishes and concerns of the electorate and continue to treat voters with contempt…” Jul 28, 02:42
Young Lochinvar on Ain’t it funny how things change?: “AI Dun @ 7.04 And why does that statement seem to sit so very very comfortably with you, site pearl…” Jul 28, 01:26
Graf Midgehunter on The Nobodies: “You will never need an excuse to show a photo of Monica Bellucci..! And anyway, it’ll help cleanse the site…” Jul 28, 00:30
Oneliner on The Nobodies: “I think that his brother adopted the same attitude to VAT” Jul 28, 00:27
Ex President Xiden on The Nobodies: “I remember Sarwar when asked to comment on his hypocrisy of fronting a party advocating the abolishment of private education…” Jul 27, 23:06
Young Lochinvar on The Nobodies: “Well said Dan.” Jul 27, 22:32
willie on The Nobodies: “The X link is to a parody of the US police detective Lieutenant Columbo investigating Nicola Sturgeon. Peppered with real…” Jul 27, 21:47
Spartan 117 on The Nobodies: ““Scottish” Labour are irrelevant and will remain so forever more.” Jul 27, 21:24
100%Yes on The Nobodies: “Its a pity when the Redcoats went to their country’s they didn’t have an option. Lets all turn a blind…” Jul 27, 20:24
Hatey McHateface on The Nobodies: “Calm down. It’s just DEI. It won’t personally affect you. Be much more concerned by the DEI appointments in your…” Jul 27, 20:20
Hatey McHateface on The Nobodies: “Somebody defo told somebody to piss off.” Jul 27, 20:16
