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The Great British Elephant 276

Posted on February 05, 2015 by

One of the most interesting things about the recent Ashcroft polls is the flurry of articles they’ve provoked in the media, as London-based political commentators try to outdo each other in displaying their complete ignorance of Scottish politics.

It’s eerily reminiscent of the sudden surge of activity when the gaps in referendum polls reached margin-of-error levels, and metropolitan journalists suddenly realised that Scotland was taking the referendum far more seriously than they were.

topsy

Two of the most revealing have been in the Spectator, with James Forsyth saying the Unionist collaborations in the No campaign “marked a recognition that Great Britain is far bigger, and far more important, than party politics”, and Fraser Nelson becoming Scottish Labour’s most unlikely cheerleader, saying “Finally, a confession. I’d like the Tories to win the next election, but not as much as I want Jim Murphy to do well”.

But amid all the outpourings of grief and befuddlement, it’s startling how little analysis there really is into why the UK is in the situation it currently is. And it’s odd because the answer isn’t the least bit complicated.

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The new line 84

Posted on February 05, 2015 by

The letter below is extraordinary, readers. See if it fits with what you remember.

asimplefact

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The forgetful ones 188

Posted on February 05, 2015 by

Only a few diehards in the press are still clinging this morning to the Labour fiction we exposed yesterday, namely the flat-out empirical falsehood that “the biggest party gets to form a government” in the event of a hung Parliament.

hunglie

The Daily Record’s hapless political editor Torcuil Crichton desperately fought against the proven facts on Good Morning Scotland as an incredulous Iain Macwhirter looked on, and a few of the party’s more unhinged supporters battle on on social media, but after some diligent battering away with evidence it looks like we’ve finally managed to get the message through to most of a reluctant media.

But why was it ever in doubt?

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A thousand miles of stupid 233

Posted on February 04, 2015 by

Even we can’t quite believe this one, readers.

Good grief, where do we even start?

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Those who would rule us 345

Posted on February 02, 2015 by

There’s currently a fake “petition” on the Labour website.

faketition

Ostensibly it’s gathering signatures representing opposition to the bedroom tax, but in fact its only purpose is to harvest email addresses so that Labour can then bombard unwitting recipients with dodgy, untruthful solicitations for cash. (What would actually be the point of a petition about the bedroom tax at this stage?)

That’s not the terrible thing about it, though.

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The Super-Duper Mega Vow Deluxe Plus 126

Posted on February 02, 2015 by

We’ve already said all we’ve got to say on this one.

The lost art of keeping a secret weapon 272

Posted on January 31, 2015 by

Kate Devlin of the Herald has been a political journalist as long as we can remember.

secretweapon1

So it’s quite surprising that she’s apparently never heard of Gordon Brown before.

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An unsettling development 110

Posted on January 30, 2015 by

Since we’ve been talking about mad letters from Scottish Labour MPs today, we’re sharing this one with you too. We’ve been trying to make sense of it all evening.

darlingletter

We haven’t made any progress. It’s not just a simple accidental transposition of words, because if you switch “increased” and “decreased” around it’s still gibberish – why would the threat have decreased because of proliferation? If anyone can explain it, do drop us a line.

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A couple of hours off 170

Posted on January 30, 2015 by

Because there’s really no satire we can add to this magnificent zoomery:

mccann

So we might as well pop out to the shops for a bit.

Hubris and nemesis 138

Posted on January 30, 2015 by

With a knife-edge general election just 90-odd days away, we must confess ourselves surprised at the sudden rash of candour/indiscipline (depending on how generously you want to frame it) that’s broken out in Scottish Labour.

labfirst

It started soon after the referendum, when Edinburgh Labour chairman Trevor Davies felt confident enough, with the vote won, to announce on an officially-backed Labour website that his primary loyalty was to his party rather than to the people of Scotland, under the startlingly blunt headline “Labour first, Scottish second”.

But any notion that the comments represented nothing more than a vainglorious and momentary slip from a loose cannon were soon dispelled.

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Gathering speed 271

Posted on January 29, 2015 by

Ed Miliband, who is apparently the leader of the Labour Party, is in Scotland today to make some promises about his lifelong commitment to “Home Rule”, a policy which his MSPs were flatly denying ever mentioning earlier this month.

edhome

We’re sure he’ll be as good as his word.

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Know what you’re voting for 381

Posted on January 28, 2015 by

There’s been much discussion in the press lately about Jim Murphy’s plan to change the elusive Scottish Labour “constitution”, a document almost nobody has ever seen and which most people didn’t know even existed until a few weeks ago.

murphygrumpy

Naturally we were curious to have a wee look, so when we stumbled across a page on the Electoral Commission website which said it held copies of party constitutions and provided them on request, we thought we’d take a shot on the off-chance. We weren’t at all surprised by the reply:

“the Commission does not hold a constitution for the Scottish Labour Party per se, since they are not separately registered with us. The Labour Party is registered for GB as a whole.”

But then an alert reader asked the EC a smarter question.

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    • Saffron Robe on The Shortest Day: “My central point is that the Union was illegitimate at its inception, and the passing of time does not alter…Sep 5, 03:15
    • twathater on Anything But That: “Another link to educate people to the damage progressives do https://markacollett.substack.com/p/strangled-and-raped-by-an-ethiopian?utm_source=post-email-title&publication_id=4738145&post_id=214132287&utm_campaign=email-post-title&isFreemail=true&r=nd6hf&triedRedirect=true&utm_medium=emailSep 5, 02:46
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    • Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: “Burnham gave him a wee piece of Manchesterism to play with. Said “Here you go, John, you can be King…Sep 4, 23:41
    • James on Anything But That: “Cheers, girls; you’ve proved my point. As expected.Sep 4, 23:10
    • willie on Anything But That: “Water was hived into East , West and North before it it was fettled up to become Scottish Water. A…Sep 4, 23:05
    • Mark Beggan on Anything But That: “2+2=5.Sep 4, 22:50
    • willie on Anything But That: “Water was hived into East , West and North before it it was fettled up to become Scottish Water. A…Sep 4, 22:47
    • Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: “@ James says: 4 September, 2026 at 9:33 pm “all they have is inults” Side splitting for two reasons, the…Sep 4, 22:25
    • Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: ““Fourteen health boards into two” Why two? Theoretical mathematicians argues there are only 3 numbers worth dealing with: zero, one…Sep 4, 22:18
    • Aidan on Anything But That: “Oh it’s “James” – this should be good Adult nappy.Sep 4, 21:59
    • Mark Beggan on Anything But That: “Baby Swinney says “We are going to make the NHS great again. Believe me. We’re going to march down there…Sep 4, 21:42
    • James on Anything But That: “oh, Yoon pile-on. As usual all they have is inults. Keep going, Alf, you’re getting to them. Truth hurts and…Sep 4, 21:33
    • Aidan on Anything But That: “So if you reject the authority of the courts, are you proposing for your ideas to lead to a violent…Sep 4, 21:24
    • Chas on Anything But That: “I fail to see the detailed analysis. I do see the usual mince. Figures plucked out of thin air yet…Sep 4, 21:19
    • Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: ““No person or institution that took part in negotiating, agreeing, signing, or ratifying the 1707 Treaty of Union ever held…Sep 4, 21:01
    • Xaracen on Anything But That: “@Aidan; The question of lawful authority in 1707 is not a matter for judicial discretion. It is a matter of…Sep 4, 20:58
    • Aidan on Anything But That: “Yes Alf – your tautological proposition is: – if Scotland was wealthier than Norway (because) then Scotland would be wealthier…Sep 4, 20:49
    • Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: ““places a liberated Scotland above Norway” Wow, fifty years of Scotland’s oil wealth being “plundered by England”. Fifty years of…Sep 4, 20:42
    • Aidan on Anything But That: “If it’s irrefutable Xaracen – then why not argue it in court where these matters are properly determined?Sep 4, 20:06
    • Chas on Anything But That: “The usual mince from the supposedly learned professor. Figures plucked from thin air and a conclusion that does not stand…Sep 4, 19:51
    • Xaracen on Anything But That: “@Aidan; “Ultimately – those proposing independence are those proposing to change the status quo.” And so they absolutely should! The…Sep 4, 19:48
    • Alf Baird on Anything But That: ““If there is anybody who genuinely believes in this £150+ billion a year figure” Well here’s another quite detailed analysis…Sep 4, 19:42
    • Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: “Seems like hardly any time since you were telling us it’s £200 billion a year. Whatever, what’s £50 billion between…Sep 4, 18:52
    • Alf Baird on Anything But That: ““The court in The Hague reckons the Orcs owe $4.22 billion” Small beer, or the cost of one dodgy aircraft…Sep 4, 16:34
    • Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: “Respect to the Norwegians. They’re rediscovering their inner Viking and taking back control of the seas around their coastline. All…Sep 4, 14:28
    • Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: “Aye, James, breaths there as many as even ten True Sovereign Scots who have not, on reading your post, redoubled…Sep 4, 13:42
    • Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: ““highly valuable natural resources” Odd that nobody, either in Scotland or outside, knew we had any highly valuable natural resources…Sep 4, 13:36
    • Mark Beggan on Anything But That: “Dear Slave, Shut up and eat your porridge or we will stop your privileges. Yours faithfully Sir Biggus ‘Fluffy’ Dickus…Sep 4, 13:22
    • James Che on Anything But That: “There is ni UK parliament concerning Scotland, as the UK parliament has a start date of origin of 1800, When…Sep 4, 12:03
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