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The news less fit to print 257

Posted on May 28, 2014 by

It’s not often that you see the same story on the front page of the i and the Financial Times. It’s even rarer – in fact, perhaps unprecedented – if that story’s about Scotland, because the otherwise-admirable mini-tabloid is barely even aware that there’s a part of the UK north of Newcastle.

(Its parent paper, the Independent, is we think unique among national UK newspapers in not even having a Scotland section, let alone a Scottish edition.)

ift

So when it happens, you know it must be a pretty darned significant story – one which the Scottish press will be all over like a swarm of wasps at a jam-factory picnic. Right?

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Welcome to Gobbler’s Knob 84

Posted on March 25, 2014 by

We think we might have just worked out why Scottish newspaper sales are in irreversible decline, readers. It’s because if you buy the papers for about two weeks you can just keep them in a drawer, bring them out a few weeks later and read all the same stories again without having to pay for them twice.

gobknob

Because in the Scottish media, every day is Groundhog Day.

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Quoted for truth #40 50

Posted on December 15, 2013 by

The Huffington Post, 15 December 2013:

“The number of Britons who think Ed Miliband is likely to be the prime minister after the next election has fallen dramatically, according to a poll.

Research by ComRes for the Independent on Sunday and Sunday Mirror found 21% believed the Labour leader would be in No 10 after the next election, down 10 points since May.”

This, remember, is after a summer in which the nation’s political commentators almost universally agreed that Miliband’s conference promise of an energy price freeze and subsequent talk of a cost-of-living crisis was winning the hearts of the country.

Last week three separate opinion polls showed Labour’s lead over the Tories down to a pitiful five points, despite 70% of the population saying they’d felt no benefit from Britain’s feeble economic “recovery”.

We don’t think Labour has ever sacked a leader who hadn’t contested at least one general election. Ed Miliband will lead them to the polls in 2015, and only one in five Britons thinks he’ll end up in Number 10. Don’t take our word for it. Don’t heed the experts. Don’t even examine the statistics. Listen to the people who’ll be voting.

Gutter press aspired to 87

Posted on October 18, 2013 by

We forget who, but someone we read this week – in the Herald, we think – referenced a line spoken by Jennifer Aniston’s character in an old episode of Friends (which we’ve managed to identify as S02E01, “The One With Ross’s New Girlfriend”):

“When I saw him get off that plane with her, I really thought I just hit rock bottom. But today, it’s like there’s rock bottom, then 50 feet of crap, then me.”

We were put in mind of it by something in this afternoon’s Guardian.

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A sense of priorities 139

Posted on September 12, 2013 by

The papers, as you’d expect, take some differing views today of John Swinney’s draft Scottish Government budget, delivered in the Holyrood chamber yesterday. But two articles in particular caught our eye.

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    • Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “Don’t be a Dumbo. Everyone going into a polling station doesn’t go there to vote for a candidate they dislike…May 4, 14:37
    • Mark Beggan on Seven Days Too Long: “As the BBC always like to say; ‘This is what we know so far’ People on Wings with fake names…May 4, 14:29
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    • Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “Agent, Good for you. We’re all out of lollipops today tho. Try again in another five years.May 4, 13:42
    • Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “Aye Dan. It’s all they’ve got. The same outdated, debunked, regurgitated bs on repeat. Thanks for the link. AI Dan…May 4, 13:40
    • Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “Labour evolved into a lot more than that. They’re more sly & devious than the Tories. At least the Tories…May 4, 13:34
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    • Cynicus on Seven Days Too Long: ““Hope some folk read this so that they can see ‘both votes SNP’ are utterly wasteful. “ ========== Like the…May 4, 11:42
    • Dan on Seven Days Too Long: “@ Geri Johnny-come-lately Aidan’s is just the latest of a long series of agitators to rock up btl. He’s no…May 4, 10:30
    • Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “Well Scots withdrew them from Westminster. This will be SNPs first real test at Holyrood. The last Holyrood election was…May 4, 10:12
    • Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “See AI Dan, this is why yer thick as shit. GERS figures are based on CURRENT spending habits of being…May 4, 09:44
    • James Che on Seven Days Too Long: “It would not take many Scottish elections to reduce and eventual delete Colonialism , faster than the mandates given to…May 4, 09:18
    • James Che on Seven Days Too Long: “Scotland simply removes the Colonial political parties from Scotland wether they are english registered and at the same time remove…May 4, 09:02
    • diabloandco on Seven Days Too Long: “1. ote Counting: Each party’s total votes are counted. 2. Initial Quotient: For the first seat, each party’s quotient is…May 4, 08:57
    • James Che on Seven Days Too Long: “The Farage Fear Factors, What about the batshit crazy green goblins,May 4, 08:51
    • James Che on Seven Days Too Long: “Curious to see how how the vote count for SNP could hold a majority successful outcome if people in Scotland…May 4, 08:46
    • Xaracen on Seven Days Too Long: “Well said, James.May 4, 08:28
    • Aidan on Seven Days Too Long: “Feel free Geri, to post a link to the high quality and detailed analysis which shows that an independent Scotland…May 4, 08:01
    • Aidan on Seven Days Too Long: “What a pleasure it is to wake up to yet another rabies-induced psychotic rant from Geri. Quite frankly how her/it…May 4, 07:53
    • Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “Who is saying we’ll be billions in debt after independence? What do we owe? Zero. Who do we owe it…May 4, 02:39
    • Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “Just a suggestion but I wonder if AtLS has ever reached out to Phantom Power to work together? They used…May 4, 00:50
    • Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “To lock out other independent parties. Sturgeon boasted herself, live on telly, she’d rather work with yoons than with Alex…May 3, 22:35
    • Mark Beggan on Seven Days Too Long: “The Farage Fear Factor, Trump Derangement Syndrome. The Tit Whisperer, Dirty Filthy Labour and Queers for Terrorists. Yes indeed. The…May 3, 22:12
    • sarah on Seven Days Too Long: “2016 SNP list vote gained NIL seats. 2021 SNP list vote [over 1 million of them] gained 2 seats. If…May 3, 21:58
    • Young Lochinvar on Seven Days Too Long: “Hahahaha:-)May 3, 21:33
    • Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “They’re as thick as shit. No wonder the Eppy class shafts them. Dumb doff capping serfs only have the attention…May 3, 20:53
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