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The news less fit to print 257

Posted on May 28, 2014 by

It’s not often that you see the same story on the front page of the i and the Financial Times. It’s even rarer – in fact, perhaps unprecedented – if that story’s about Scotland, because the otherwise-admirable mini-tabloid is barely even aware that there’s a part of the UK north of Newcastle.

(Its parent paper, the Independent, is we think unique among national UK newspapers in not even having a Scotland section, let alone a Scottish edition.)

ift

So when it happens, you know it must be a pretty darned significant story – one which the Scottish press will be all over like a swarm of wasps at a jam-factory picnic. Right?

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Welcome to Gobbler’s Knob 84

Posted on March 25, 2014 by

We think we might have just worked out why Scottish newspaper sales are in irreversible decline, readers. It’s because if you buy the papers for about two weeks you can just keep them in a drawer, bring them out a few weeks later and read all the same stories again without having to pay for them twice.

gobknob

Because in the Scottish media, every day is Groundhog Day.

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Quoted for truth #40 50

Posted on December 15, 2013 by

The Huffington Post, 15 December 2013:

“The number of Britons who think Ed Miliband is likely to be the prime minister after the next election has fallen dramatically, according to a poll.

Research by ComRes for the Independent on Sunday and Sunday Mirror found 21% believed the Labour leader would be in No 10 after the next election, down 10 points since May.”

This, remember, is after a summer in which the nation’s political commentators almost universally agreed that Miliband’s conference promise of an energy price freeze and subsequent talk of a cost-of-living crisis was winning the hearts of the country.

Last week three separate opinion polls showed Labour’s lead over the Tories down to a pitiful five points, despite 70% of the population saying they’d felt no benefit from Britain’s feeble economic “recovery”.

We don’t think Labour has ever sacked a leader who hadn’t contested at least one general election. Ed Miliband will lead them to the polls in 2015, and only one in five Britons thinks he’ll end up in Number 10. Don’t take our word for it. Don’t heed the experts. Don’t even examine the statistics. Listen to the people who’ll be voting.

Gutter press aspired to 87

Posted on October 18, 2013 by

We forget who, but someone we read this week – in the Herald, we think – referenced a line spoken by Jennifer Aniston’s character in an old episode of Friends (which we’ve managed to identify as S02E01, “The One With Ross’s New Girlfriend”):

“When I saw him get off that plane with her, I really thought I just hit rock bottom. But today, it’s like there’s rock bottom, then 50 feet of crap, then me.”

We were put in mind of it by something in this afternoon’s Guardian.

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A sense of priorities 139

Posted on September 12, 2013 by

The papers, as you’d expect, take some differing views today of John Swinney’s draft Scottish Government budget, delivered in the Holyrood chamber yesterday. But two articles in particular caught our eye.

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    • Hatey McHateface on Haven’t had a dream in a long time: ““After years of simply stalling on the pursuit of independence, the SNP now appears to be in full headlong retreat,…Aug 31, 23:07
    • Young Lochinvar on The Shortest Day: “LC Very good! However you forgot to mention the bribery, offers of position and rank and overall subterfuge with a…Aug 31, 22:58
    • Hatey McHateface on Haven’t had a dream in a long time: “A disappointing but perhaps not unexpected reversion to type, Northy. The Record View makes a valid point, not that any…Aug 31, 22:49
    • duncanio on Haven’t had a dream in a long time: “The Daily Record’s ‘suggestion’ is merely an effort to make British Labour relevant again in Scotland so that they can…Aug 31, 22:46
    • Spartan 117 on Haven’t had a dream in a long time: “Well, quite. Lard Foolkes and his ilk would happily do away with elections permanently, makes things much easier for them…Aug 31, 22:41
    • Hatey McHateface on The Shortest Day: “Naw, Spartan. Exhibit W.Aug 31, 22:35
    • Hatey McHateface on The Shortest Day: “That’s the Spandau gonna be well and truly cocked now!Aug 31, 22:33
    • Spartan 117 on The Shortest Day: “QED, Exhibit A.Aug 31, 22:18
    • Northcode on Haven’t had a dream in a long time: “By George Foulkes, Baron Foulkes of Cumnock’s – Born in Shropshire and educated privately at The Haberdashers’ Aske’s Boys’ School…Aug 31, 22:14
    • Mark Beggan on Haven’t had a dream in a long time: “Anyone for a carrot! It’s feeding time at the zoo.Aug 31, 22:02
    • James on The Shortest Day: “So say the English Nationalists. Fuck off.Aug 31, 21:57
    • James on The Shortest Day: “Ah. “…Naw it isnae….” The usual. Dan kindly provided the relevant liknk. https://wingsoverscotland.com/true-faith/ Read it, and weep, Yoon.Aug 31, 21:54
    • Effijy on Haven’t had a dream in a long time: “With all financial levers controlled by Westminster these 300 years and debt spiralling up to £3 Trillion and the first…Aug 31, 21:44
    • 100%Yes on Haven’t had a dream in a long time: “The reality is the more and more people voice that Independence is their preferred option to the union. The more…Aug 31, 21:40
    • Alf Baird on The Shortest Day: ““Maybe you could start one of the ‘democratic legitimacy’ processes yourself!” 20,000 sovereign Scots already have: https://liberation.scot/Aug 31, 21:37
    • 100%Yes on Haven’t had a dream in a long time: “This is all because the SNP membership has grown a back bone and got upset about not being being able…Aug 31, 21:29
    • Mike Fenwick on Haven’t had a dream in a long time: “For info, my contribution in The National today. Tommy Sheppard writes in The National as to ” Why a de…Aug 31, 21:28
    • Cuphook on Haven’t had a dream in a long time: “Not that we’re going to get one due to our current political emasculation, but we’d lose another referendum unless the…Aug 31, 21:26
    • 100%Yes on Haven’t had a dream in a long time: “The simplest solution is for Westminster to transfer the Constitutional authority to Holyrood for good and allow the Scots to…Aug 31, 21:19
    • Spartan 117 on Haven’t had a dream in a long time: “Interesting indeed.Aug 31, 21:14
    • Spartan 117 on The Shortest Day: “And often with a load of abuse heaped in, along with Grrr Bloody English racism. The Siol nan Gaidheal members…Aug 31, 21:09
    • Ross on Haven’t had a dream in a long time: “Kudos for the uncle tom cobbley reference haha. Was sitting on his supposed seat the other day!Aug 31, 21:07
    • Southernbystander on The Shortest Day: “O/T I was in Edinburgh last week for a few days and walking down South St Davids Street (off Princes…Aug 31, 21:02
    • Hatey McHateface on The Shortest Day: “A billion or two deaths is WW3 once it really gets going. So far, it has just been warming up.Aug 31, 20:52
    • Chas on The Shortest Day: “The majority of the rabid kind of nationalist on Wings is prepared to accept and believe any statistic presented by…Aug 31, 20:51
    • Hatey McHateface on The Shortest Day: ““This being the constitutional reality some might wonder why the SNP hasn’t pursued any of those “democratic legitimacy” mechanisms” Only…Aug 31, 20:49
    • Chas on The Shortest Day: “Maybe you could start one of the ‘democratic legitimacy’ processes yourself! I am sure we will all be right behind…Aug 31, 20:42
    • Chas on The Shortest Day: “Finance is clearly not your strong suit Alf but……….what is? Surprised that Fanny and Mummi have nothing to say about…Aug 31, 20:38
    • Hatey McHateface on The Shortest Day: “Took you a while, sam, but you’ve belatedly discovered GNI. Well done you. The night is yet young. See if…Aug 31, 20:37
    • Northcode on The Shortest Day: “A question: Is Scotland a prisoner (rhetorically) of the United Kingdom unless Westminster allows the Scots the opportunity to reclaim…Aug 31, 20:32
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