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The final meltdown

Posted on April 08, 2016 by

Poor old Daily Record.

rechag

What a distance to fall.

It can’t be easy to be the declining tabloid’s Westminster political correspondent these days. Accustomed to decades of spoon-fed stories from tame Scottish Labour MPs, the SNP landslide of 2015 has left Crichton’s contacts book barer than Kezia Dugdale’s talent cupboard.

The resentment has been building up for the last 11 months, and Torcuil just hasn’t been able to hold it back a moment longer, exploding all over page 25 today in what isn’t so much a column as a last desperate cry for help.

It bears a close examination, so buckle in, readers.

torcuil1

It has? Since April 2014? Five months before the independence referendum and seven months before Sturgeon was even the leader of the party? That’s some impressive forward thinking.

torcuil2

The post-referendum bloom that nobody saw coming? Or is Torcuil suddenly telling us that he foresaw the SNP more than quadrupling its membership and going from six MPs to 56 in one leap? We don’t remember him mentioning it at the time, but maybe we’ve just forgotten.

torcuil3

Absolutely no “deal” has been signed, of course. There’s not a shred of evidence that SinoFortone, the Chinese company involved, is “shady” – UK civil servant Sir Richard Heygate, who advised on the talks, says they’re “squeaky clean”. And we’re not sure why Brian Souter’s opinion is relevant to anything, but shouldn’t EVERYONE be “delighted” if it turns out that £10bn investment does come to Scotland?

torcuil4

A deal so “secret” there are photographs of the signing ceremony all over the internet, because the company put out a press release about it on its website the same day and it was reported in the Scotsman a few days later:

sinopress

scotsmansino

We can only assume that to Torcuil, anything not whispered to him by a Labour MP over gin and tonics on the terrace of the Strangers’ Bar counts as a secret.

torcuil5

Oh well, if permanently, comically bitter anti-devolution ex-Labour MP and nuclear power fanboy Brian Wilson said something, it MUST be legit. We do hope Torcuil tries to make the phrase “infamous Sino-Souter memo” stick.

(We’re also impressed by his esoteric use of punctuation. Full stops at the end of sentences are for squares, daddio. And HAS Sturgeon been under pressure to explain? We keenly await the answer to that apparent question.)

torcuil6

We’re not sure in what sense the explanations are “flaky”. There’s nothing to report, just talks about talks. Had the Scottish Government made a song and dance about it, the opposition parties would have screamed about an announcement of no substance being used as an election tool. But the details of the memorandum were promptly released in full for maximum transparency.

torcuil7

This is spectacular. The “cash for honours” enquiry wasn’t undertaken because the SNP complained. It happened because the Metropolitan Police decided there was a case to answer. When the matter came to light the Labour Party had to pay back “loans” it had been given by people who were subsequently awarded titles. And the conclusion was hardly a resounding proclamation of innocence:

“After a long review of the police file, it was reported on 20 July 2007 that the Crown Prosecution Service would not bring any charges against any of the individuals involved.

Their decision stated that while peerages may have been given in exchange for loans, it could not find direct evidence that that had been agreed in advance; this direct evidence of an agreement in advance is what would be required for a successful prosecution. 

Notwithstanding the lack of any charges, some considered that the investigation had severely undermined Tony Blair’s position, and possibly hastened his resignation as Prime Minister.”

It was a case not entirely unlike most of the expenses scandal or the more recent one involving Alistair Carmichael, in that pretty much everyone agreed there had been some enormously dodgy goings-on, but in the strictest technical sense there was no absolutely definitive proof that the letter of the law had been breached.

It’s an odd wound for a hyper-partisan Labour hack to reopen, let’s put it that way.

torcuil8

We’re almost at maximum froth now. Apparently “the machinery of government is prostrated” means “there wasn’t a press release”. There’s not the slightest suggestion that Brian Souter stands to gain in any way from any deal that may eventually happen – talks have apparently focused on clean energy projects and building affordable housing, fields in which Souter has no business interests whatsoever.

(His companies deal in public transport and insurance. But the prospect of major investment in renewables does at least suggest why Brian Wilson is so angry.)

torcuil9

Next we get a festival of weasel words which amount to “there is no actual evidence that the company has done anything wrong”. And frankly, we’re not even sure why Scottish people should care if the company had paid a few bribes in its lifetime anyway. Bribery is how things generally get done in China.

“Among the white paper’s key findings is that a startling 35 percent of companies in China pay bribes or give gifts in order to operate. One CFO went to so far as to describe the practice as ‘an unspoken rule.'”

Torcuil also didn’t mind when SinoFortone was investing in the UK, not Scotland:

sinouk

The company’s name has never featured in the Record until the last few days. At this point Torcuil loses his last few marbles.

torcuil10

We don’t know what to do with that, frankly.

torcuil11

“The propaganda output of Communist China”? It’s not the first description we’d come up with for The Scotsman, but each to their own, we suppose.

torcuil12

The SIC is an independent role not controlled by the Scottish Government. It answers for its own decisions. But sod it, let’s pin it on the First Minister anyway. SNP BAD!

torcuil13

Torcuil’s got at least five tinfoil hats on now as he works himself into a frenzy, pointing at the sky and shrieking about chemtrails and spiders and probably lizards. We’re not exactly sure how much power he thinks the Scottish Government wields over Qatar’s human-rights records, but we’re moved by his sudden concern for poetry.

We don’t recall the Record lambasting Qatar overly much about the fate of its poets until there was a chance to attack the SNP over it, mind you. Again, as far as we can make out this is the first time it’s ever mentioned them.

qatarpoet

Nor did Torcuil or the Record voice any qualms about Qatar’s human rights record when one of their political heroes was doing its ruling royal family some favours:

blairqatar

And then we’re off onto Torcuil’s inexplicable obsession with Brian Souter again. His bloodied stumps of fingers are now hammering so frenetically at the keyboard that letters are just going anywhere, with Souter’s name swapping an A and an E with the word “altar” as the details of Souter’s business schedule seemingly become the concern and responsibility of every SNP MP:

torcuil14

And then we get a spectacular final flourish in which at the last minute the whole thing suddenly and bewilderingly becomes about the steel industry:

torcuil15

So to recap: there’s been no deal of any kind with anyone, none of it involves steel, as far as we can tell Brian Souter had absolutely nothing to do with it anywhere along the line but there are unanswered questions about the colour of his shoes, somehow the poets of Qatar are implicated along with diplomatic spiders, but it all proves that you can’t trust Nicola Sturgeon.

We’re going to have a bit of a lie down now, readers. If any of this starts making any sense at any point, we’ll get back to you. The one thing that DOES add up, though, is the rate at which the Daily Record’s sales figures are vanishing down the toilet.

dailyrecordsales2

Tick, as we’ve been heard to say, tock.

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    1. 08 04 16 14:34

      The final meltdown | Stuff from the Internet | ...

    337 to “The final meltdown”

    1. Marcia says:

      Well done young man. You should take over his space on that newspaper and let readers see what proper journalism should be.

    2. Grouse Beater says:

      Read that article this morning in my favourite eatery over a BLT and an Americano coffee. For the life of me, outside his glaring animus, I could not see why he drags in Souter.

      Torcuil Crichton, another back-slapped shill of British imperialism tells Scotland that if it thinks for itself, if it dare make a decision that benefits its citizens, he will ensure it is stopped in its tracks, personally. And by any sleazy means in his sweaty grasp.

      Some much for the much trumpeted ‘free markets, and ‘healthy competition’ the very lie of neo-liberal economics that protects its monopoly market.

      That tragedy for Crichton and his lickspittle like is how swiftly and without warning the British Establishment will dump him unceremoniously when it suits them.

    3. Neil Cook says:

      Lets hope Brian Souter sues him for deformation of character, wonder what his Boss would say if there was a law suit going its way?

      Mans a tool and preaching to the stupid who believe his pish !

    4. Peter Mirtitsch says:

      Err…Wasn’t Qatar one of the countries involved in bailing out the UK banks?

    5. I am genuinely wondering if Torcuil Crichton was sober when he wrote this stuff.

    6. heedtracker says:

      OMGod. How the mighty go mad. He’s also double up with hard core UKOK toryboy Kevrage. Why would Start Voting SLab You Morons Daily Record pay a toryboy unionist to waffle away UKOK style, shock?

      https://twitter.com/kevverage

      Bit disappointed Keverage left out all his amazing excel graphs of Scotland’s a shithole.

    7. Stravaiger says:

      I feel like I wandered into an alternative universe for a wee minute there.

    8. Auld Rock says:

      Hopefully his self-inflated idignation will now blow-up into millions of unrecognisable pieces.

      Auld Rock

    9. Andy Murie says:

      More to be laughed at than pitied

    10. Fat boab says:

      Psst, Torcuil, a wee bird told me that Nicola owns an expensive coffee-machine. Why not write a story – – – oh, you have.

    11. Betty Boop says:

      This tripe passes for “journalism”? Ye gods. What a bitter and mangled waste of words.

      His spelling, like his punctuation,isn’t too hot either, hence “…kneeling at the same alter.” Hope his parents didn’t pay too much for his education.

      Anyway, the DR piece was pathetic, but, Stu’s comments provided a lot of entertainment. 🙂

      They’re feeling the fear…

    12. John Walsh says:

      SNP ministers STUMBLE into diplomatic spiders webs .FFS! Is he setting the scene for his new novel . ” Prostrate on the Altar of truth”
      Should have just typed I must find the SNPBAD 100 times.

    13. One_Scot says:

      That’s the thing, the more bizarre the Yoon media becomes in their attempt to put people off of the SNP, the easier it is for the voting public to see how full of shit they are.

      Scotland is only heading for one destination. Roll on May and let’s make sure we put a few more nails in the Yoons coffin.

    14. Not Convinced says:

      I think I can see why an ex-Labour MP (and isn’t it interesting that’s described as “former minister” rather than “former MP”?) would bring up the Cash-for-Honours scandal …

      You see that was old-new-Labour who did that, whereas under the wondrous Corbyn they are now new-old-Labour. New-old-Labour are completely different to old-new-Labour who did that scandalous thing, and thus New-old-Labour would never do such a thing! Plus if we bring it up and mention the SNP at the same time, maybe some of the mud from that will stick to the SNP?

    15. G says:

      “Ordinary punters won’t have heard much about gas-rich Middle Eastern dynasty accused of corruptly buying the 2022 World Cup while building football stadiums in the desert on the sun-bleached bones of immigrant labour.”

      “Ordinary punters” clearly means ignorant Record-reading oafs.

    16. heedtracker says:

      Ajami was initially jailed for life in 2012, but the sentence was reduced to 15 years on appeal in 2013.

      http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-middle-east-35830372

      Its nice that Torcuil and the Record care so much about a poet in Qatar but he’s released now. The Daily Record ran an incredible campaign for its poetry loving readers for the release of this poet too, didn’t they.

    17. Dan Huil says:

      Poor wee Torcuil. Desperation sweats out of every pore in his britnat body. With declining sales of britnat “newspapers” maybe Torcuil is fishing for a job at the bbc?

    18. Mikewr says:

      Torcuil please don’t give up the day job. I don’t think you’ll cut it as a journalist.

    19. Luigi says:

      Wow, what a rant. It looks like old TC had years and years of bitter pain and frustration to get off his chest before he finally exploded. TC and his fellow yoon reporters have completely lost the plot. They have always made things up, but they used to dress up their alcohol-fuelled SNP BAD narrative with a bit of reality spin for respectability. Now they are getting careless, and they don’t seem to care any more. It’s as if they know nobody believes them anymore anyway so they may as well have a big ugly rant and fire off as many SNP BAD volleys as they can. The yoon reporters are caught in a corporate death spiral and they cannot seem to get out of it. My heart bleeds. 🙂

    20. Wot about the millions donated to Labour by aspiring Peers, etc.? Does the Torque ever give them a menshie?

      Torque verb (used without object), torqued, torquing.

      to rotate or twist.

    21. Macart says:

      Oh good grief! That Crichton fella’s gone tonto surely?

      He does know that just throwing out words in no particular order, without any quantifiable evidence of any kind mind, makes him look completely mad?

      Having said that, we are talking about a representative of Scotland’s Chumpion.

    22. Dcanmore says:

      ‘Daily Record’ sounds and feels like something I remembered in the distant past, all seems vague now. Had a wee splutter of my drink when I saw K***n H***e’s blank-outs on the opposite page, f**king hilarious! 🙂

      As for Torcuil? The phrase ‘ever decreasing circles’ comes to mind. I heard vinyl is making a comeback so maybe Torcuil could start a new career in recycling the Yoons broken records.

    23. ScottishPsyche says:

      What frothing nonsense that man Torcuil writes.

      Brian Souter and his trademark red kickers? Eh?

      On a more serious note, if the DR is your only source of ‘information’ you are being completely misled on all aspects of this MOU with the Chinese. I would not be surprised if they pull out of any further talks due to the attacks by the Scottish Press.

      On any level this is poor journalism.

      Also, doesn’t Kevin do business with the Chinese?

    24. Big Jock says:

      Oh dear poor sod. He can’t hide his bitterness in the red mist of bile.

      All I will say is this:” Never trust a man in Brown shoes and Navy trousers”…..and he salgs Souters red shoes.

    25. GrahamB says:

      Dan Huil at 11:46
      I suspect he is already writing for the BBC website http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/election-2016-scotland-35996027 For the hard of reading they even emphasise their inuendo with quotation marks.

    26. Disco Dave says:

      Surely Torcuil has now earned his place in the “Zany Comic Relief” section with such luminaries as Cochers and Michael Kelly he will fit in well.

    27. Helpmaboab says:

      Call me a soft-hearted old duffer but I’m starting to feel sorry for die-hard unionists like Torcuil.

      Such people are innately deferential and hide-bound. Yet they can feel their cause slipping away. No matter how hard they rage and bluster the SNP continues to prosper and their cherished established order unravels further. The result is ever more unhinged and self-defeating outbursts like these.

      We owe them a duty of care. If you ever encounter poor old Torcuil or Kevin buy them a pint and don’t be TOO harsh…

    28. Luigi says:

      Betty Boop says:

      8 April, 2016 at 11:37 am

      His spelling, like his punctuation,isn’t too hot either, hence “…kneeling at the same alter.” Hope his parents didn’t pay too much for his education.

      How sober was he when he wrote it? 🙂

    29. Dr Jim says:

      In China as in Japan the giving and receiving of token gifts is indeed how business is done, these gifts are not bribes, they are ritual hand shakes which mean exactly the same as a handshake here (depending who it is) nothing

      Torcuil should acquaint himself with other customs from these countries, a popular one used to be when someone disrespected you, you killed them, nowadays in business they don’t do that they do things like buy your company and liquidate it

    30. Doug Daniel says:

      What an odd man he is. I love that he’s still gurning over the SNP highlighting the Cash For Honours scandal though. Mustn’t blacken the name of his beloved Tony Blair, eh?

    31. Almannysbunnet says:

      The SNP governing Scotland properly is bad enough but having the audacity to explore the world outside these shores and start talking and dealing with overseas governments? They’ve really gone too far this time. The Scottish Nicola Party have clearly driven him over the edge. It’s almost like the woman is behaving like she runs an independent country. Can’t be having that.
      The Daily Record will sort her out you just wait and see.

      Meanwhile the people of Scotland go about their business, proud that Nicola and her team have got their back.

      The Daily Record? The King Canute of newspapers. Trying to hold back the Scottish sea of change. Delusional to the end.

    32. Dougal McAllister says:

      What a ramble from the man, a different perspective from me on something else that Scotland benefited from China.

      Didn’t they give Scotland two panda bears on a ten years long deal for an annual fee in return?

      Apparently Edinburgh and Scotland is benefiting by tourists flocking to Edinburgh Zoo – https://www.scottish-enterprise.com/~/media/se/resources/documents/stuv/tourism%20economic%20impact%20assessment%20of%20the%20uk%20giant%20panda%20project

      I wonder if that nutcase will be demanding that Edinburgh Zoo returns the panda bears to China anytime soon!

    33. dramfineday says:

      And so the drip, drip of poison goes on. May the DR have a short and unpleasant future.

    34. Jim Mitchell says:

      He’s got to feel better now after getting all that off his chest! let’s here it for Torchy boy.

    35. Giving Goose says:

      And this is supposed to be journalism?

      The Daily Record would be better off without this idiot.
      If the Daily Record is ever after a reason as to why..

      a) The Scottish electorate abandoned Labour?

      and…

      b) The Daily Record’s sales volumes have decreased?

      Then I suggest that Torcuil’s sad attempts at writing definitely have something to do with it.

      He definitely comes over as all bitter and twisted.

      Torcuil, you are not important in Scotland any more (if indeed you ever were), so do yourself a favour and give it up.

      Go away and reinvent yourself as a…I don’t know…a floating turd or a smelly used fish n’ chips paper.

      FFS what a tube!

    36. Valerie says:

      As I read, I just thought, this is why we crowd fund WoS.

      No one in possession of a moderate IQ wants to trawl around in sewage of this volume. Or be a voyeur in the mental breakdown of fellow man.

      I like the Mars bar over Mr H+++e’s peepers.

    37. He must have caught and infection off his brother-in-law. Or was it the other way about?

    38. carjamtic says:

      Brilliant Rev. LOL

      But seriously this lad needs help…..funny as fcuk,but strangely moving :-j

      #twyner
      #snasher

    39. TD says:

      Is there something infecting Labour and its gang of sycophantic press hacks these days? If they were putting over legitimate arguments, but we as independence supporters disagreed with them, that would be fair enough – we could debate it with them. But what is quite astonishing from Dugdale, Baillie, Crichton et al is the sheer incompetence of what they say. There is not a rational point that is capable of being engaged with coming out of them. It really is a quite remarkable collapse of a one time proud political force.

    40. Seriously the guy sounds like he is on the verge of going total tonto,

      his boss or some friend should keep an eye on him before he flips and hurts himself or someone else,

      there is definitely a hate filled obsession with Nicola,like he blames her for all that is wrong in him,

      Souter and his red shoes, Quatari poetry,Norway , Communist China,sun bleached bones,East Germany,Turkish steel,mayonnaise and chicken sandwiches,barge polls,

      he`s goin Tonto a tells yi.

    41. Inverclyder says:

      Very few of their “readers” will get to that page or even read it due to the true blue, hand on heart, we are the peepul, god save the queen, bloody foreigners coming over here stealing our jobs, benefit expert, bigoted, where’s my sash, orange ordered, knuckle dragging inbred, paid up season ticket holding nature of their life.

      That and they don’t know anything about China except the phone number of the local carry out shop and Qatar is something they only get when they have a cold.

      Torcuil Crichton? Aye, Yer Maw.

    42. gerry parker says:

      Perhaps we should all contact the Chinese Embassy and let them know we have read Mr Chrichton’s article and are disappointed to learn that shady Chinese conglomerates are colluding with the Scottish Government here.

      http://www.chinese-embassy.org.uk/eng/contact_us/

    43. Almannysbunnet says:

      Maybe Torquil would be happier if Nicola signed a MOU with Tata Steel?
      Oops maybe not. It transpires that they have made a profit of over £700 million selling carbon emission permits which were issued to them for FREE by Westminster. Now they are upping sticks and heading for pastures new. Nice little scam that should make a green see red.

      What about it Crichton, surely Nicola is to blame for this too.

      https://archive.is/VxzCS

    44. Quentin Quale says:

      Mmm, you know that story about the swan that sings only once, as it nears death? Think we’re hearing the death song of journalism in the MSM political pages.

    45. hector says:

      Sad to read the above as a young Torcuil wrote some reasonable stuff many moons ago at the west Highland Free Press. At least he got Brian Wilson a mention so he will get a pat on the head.

    46. Marie Clark says:

      Oh dear. NURSE!! NURSE!!, bring the screens and some calm doon meds.

      For heavens sake, it’s another world isn’t it. I find myself wondering ” is it me”?, but somehow I don’t think it is. I better just go and check the back o’ the heid and see the zip is still okay.

      Ah well, just another four weeks o’ this bilge to go. Roll on 5th May. Sheesh.

    47. Given the standard of the article penned by Torcuil Crichton, the Scottish education system must have been in a really bad state when he was at School.

      Because I don’t believe any decent journalist, such as the late Ian Bell would even consider putting their name to it.

    48. James Westland says:

      I love that bit at the bottom of the graphic – Monday: Dont Miss Kezia Dugdale.

      Why? Going to be an absolute belter is it? I’m trembling with the excitement…..:)

    49. Marcia says:

      The DR editor let that through?

    50. Jack Murphy says:

      Crichton and the Daily Record spreading themselves aboot.
      ………………….English News……………………..
      …………………United Kingdom…………………….

      “It might be an election of trust,but can we trust Nicola Sturgeon”

      http://archive.is/mLufr

    51. Daisy Walker says:

      In the style of mCGonigle

      So pity the lowly poet in the jails of hot quatar
      Who knew a humble sonnet
      Could make you fall so far
      But fear ye not you ancient rhymer
      As you jail the test of time
      Here’s a feather in your bonnet and quill abin yer hand
      There’s a poem in every nook of your hot and dusty cell
      And with Torquill in yer corner ye know your not in hell.

      he’ll shout it from the roof tops, from Perth unto Baghdad
      Scotland’s really shit ye know and the SNP are baaaaaad.

    52. Takeourblueback says:

      Oh the vision of this…. “His bloodied stumps of fingers are now hammering so frenetically at the keyboard that letters are just going anywhere”

      … I’m sure a little bit of pee escaped when reading this 🙂

    53. Almannysbunnet says:

      Maybe Torquil was having a Basil Fawlty moment.

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78b67l_yxUc

    54. NeoconNat says:

      I stopped reading the Record when they got rid of page 3.

      We should probably reserve judgement on Torcuil until Sutherland gets here here though.

    55. Brian Powell says:

      DR sales at 160,000 now.

    56. Fred says:

      Time was when a non-entity like Crichton would be reporting sheep prices on the Stornoway Gazette, such is the parlous state of the so-called Scottish media.

      As for Brian Wilson I’m only surprised he’s still alive. How can they tell? 🙂

    57. charles says:

      I used to know Torcuil quite well, and it makes me laugh to see him dominating the piece with a giant picture of himself…typical Cravat wearing, wee free, pretentious eejit.

      Still sad to see anyone have a complete and utter mental breakdown in public.

    58. Lollysmum says:

      What a formidable dissection Rev-well done

      It’s ‘apologies for absence of journalistic integrity’ like this that explains why many of us still have the Record blocked on Twitter after months of taking a stand against the rag. Makes for a calmer read when you’re spared rubbish like this.

      Highly recommended-blocking that is-definitely not the DR 🙂

    59. gordoz says:

      WTF ? There is no deal FFS.

      Transcript from how to be a journalist class

      “Now listen up at the back! Tomkinson .. that includes you”

      “A memorandum of understanding (MOU or MoU) is a formal agreement between two or more parties. Companies and organizations can use MOUs to establish official partnerships. MOUs are not legally binding but they carry a degree of seriousness and mutual respect, stronger than a gentlemen’s agreement”

      Crumpled class notes found discarded later by one T Kryton

      “Memo of understanding = deal”

      Aaaarrggghh ????

    60. Marcia says:

      This should make one of those blooper programmes;

      https://twitter.com/BBCPhilipSim/status/718400480548941825

      Begging hand out – can you spare a pound or more for our Health Minister’s election fund.

      http://tinyurl.com/hfwasz5

    61. HandandShrimp says:

      There are recurring Yoon themes in poor Torquil’s rantathon.

      Populist leader tick
      Cult followers tick
      Evil attacks on opposition tick
      Brian Souter tick
      Smear by association tick
      Deranged hyperbole tick

      The only things missing are Trump and they are all blood and soil Nazis anyway…but Torquil may have fapped himself into a quivering pool of journalistic grease by that point and had nothing left to give.

      The above themes seem much loved by the Yoons and form the basis of most the more strident criticism on the interwebs…or are they all sock puppets of Torquil?

    62. Proud Cybernat says:

      “It’s a question of trust.”

      Two words – ‘The VOW’.

      How’d you like them apples, Crichton you fecking hypocritical moronic fud-face.

      GYTF.

    63. Hugh Barclay says:

      “bloodied stumps of fingers ” Lolz, Great piece Rev, Aye the Twisted Testicle has finally lost the plot….. Superb 🙂

    64. SteveW says:

      My respect for yoon journalists always goes down another notch with every article like this, but this one calls for bonus notches.

    65. Doug`s dad says:

      Has anyone got a copy of `Red` Ken McIntosh`s latest election leaflet to upload? I did get one but unfortunately it ended up in the bin in 100 pieces 5 minutes later.

      One section is astonishing in pledging to protect the BBC from `strident attacks` and `agendas`. Think it could do with a wee bit of deconstruction by the Rev.

    66. Derick fae Yell says:

      I think I’ve hurt my side laughing at that review

      Yoonatics!

    67. Proud Cybernat says:

      I guess Crichton’s writing talent has found the perfect platform at the ‘Daily Ridicule’.

    68. Robert Louis says:

      The strange thing is, I suppose, Torcuil is actually GETTING PAID to write such rubbish. It isn’t journalism, it contains no facts, just near hysterical piffle. He really should be embarrassed with such nonsense. It is all very well, being anti SNP or whatever, but to actually put your name to a piece of silly, childish writing like this beggars belief.

      To help Torcuil, and the unionist anti-Scotland nutters who may read this;

      1. The China agreement wasn’t secret – pictures in the press, documented by Scottish Government, full details made public etc.

      2. Brian Souter wasn’t there, and has nothing to do with it.

      Unionists really are starting to sound quite, quite mad. Seriously.

    69. Fiona says:

      If people do not know about Qatar it is not because the information is not available.

      http://thosebigwords.forumcommunity.net/?t=45774951&p=376677564

      But that, of course, is different.

    70. The only company currently listed on Norway’s investment blacklist as excluded for corruption is ZTE – who make phones for O2 (Telefonica)

      http://www.nbim.no/en/responsibility/exclusion-of-companies/

    71. Ian says:

      The MSM is pretty much driving older folk nuts. New documentary about this in the US is just as applicable here –

      http://www.alternet.org/media/brainwashing-effect-right-wing-media-my-dad-and-nation

    72. Fiona says:

      http://www.ft.com/cms/s/0/0f6c15ca-8c07-11e2-8fcf-00144feabdc0.html#axzz45EfEjaEt

      Last post link did not work. But Qatari investment in UK well known and very widely reported, and the example is accessible above

    73. dakk says:

      What a rubbish journalist is that wee weed Crichton.

      And I don’t like his stupit wee beard neither.

      Nice demolition job and great journalism Stuart.

      And your beard is much nicer too 🙂

    74. Craig MachAonghais says:

      I know I keep saying this but just when I think the Unionist Labour rag that is the Daily Rancid can’t sink any lower they produce this – I feel even Goebels would have been ashamed to produce such bilge, but apparently Torcuil Crichton is happy to put his name to this. Is he aiming for Cochrane levels of insanity?

    75. Dave M says:

      I’d love to know what grades Torcuil got for his English exams at high school. His prose is so bad, it would barely scrape a 4 at Standard Grade.

    76. Robert Louis says:

      Oh, and following on from my post above, here, for comparison, is an example of REAL journalistic opinion output;

      http://derekbateman.scot/2016/04/07/a-poor-do/

      In this excellent piece of writing by Derek Bateman, when talking of ‘Scottish’ journalists’ obsession with saying the SNP Scottish Government isn’t radical enough, he writes;

      “If one of the 99 per cent of hacks says they’re not radical enough, discount it immediately as they’re programmed to find complaint and would like nothing better than a chance to paint the Nats as socialist extremists ‘after your money’. Kenny would commission Alex who would commend David who’d be flattered by Stephen and they’d all tweet JK.

      You see, Torcuil, that’s how a REAL writer does it, full stops and all.

    77. Chitterinlicht says:

      Full
      Metal
      Jacket

    78. Tam Jardine says:

      The better together UK hacks and their political brethren are meaning to go into battle waving a memo and the named person scheme. It’s like an episode of the A-team except instead of them finding a combine harvester or a forklift truck to turn into a tank they have a toaster, a bunch of grapes and an occasional table.

      Never mind- onward! They can turn anything into a weapon it seems. Investment and children’s welfare are all they have so the election strategy to defeat the SNP is to highlight their commitment to investment and children’s welfare.

      It is poor hand to play. I wonder how they think the ordinary voter is reacting? Do they really think most folk are talking in hushed tones in the workplace or the pub about their concerns over an investment deal from China?

      We’ve been bombarded for years with the capitalist mantra- investment: good! Foreign investment: double plus good! How do they turn that round? We are supposed to think Hinkley Point is good Chinese investment but SNP Chinese investment is bad because….

      The wilderness beckons for Torquil and his colleagues. They are now simply ridiculous.

    79. scotspine says:

      Chinless prick

    80. Dorothy Devine says:

      Well done Rev for giving us all a laugh.

      Could this bloke have made himself look even more stupid?

      I never have read the Daily Record and looking at the level of intellectual analysis supplied by Mr Crichton ,I don’t think I am ever going to be tempted.

      Craig , I think he has surpassed the drivellings of Mr.Cochrane and for that he deserves some sort of accolade – suggestions please!

    81. G. Campbell says:

      China, Qatar corruption = SNP BAD.

      BAE Systems corruption = BRITISH JOBS SECURED.

      “Ordinary punters won’t have heard much about gas-rich Middle Eastern dynasty accused of corruptly buying the 2022 World Cup while building football stadiums in the desert on the sun-bleached bones of immigrant labour.”

      Presumably this means the Daily Record will be boycotting the event (unless The Rangers declare themselves an independent state and qualify, of course).

      “Right now we need a guarantee that the Scottish government will only use British steel, to protect British jobs, in all future procurement contracts.”

      Briitsh steel for British construction projects. How very nationalist.

      “But what would Sturgeon’s £10 billon infrastructure investment Chinese partners have to say about that?”

      “Why is that weird man with the beard so xenophobic?” most likely.

    82. David Wardrope says:

      The whole “policies wouldn’t matter, steady as she goes with a dash of populism…” part is a bit strange to me. If the voting public decide that the SNP record in government was working (and generally is doing so), then steady as she goes is exactly what we would be looking for. And by the same logic, if SNP are seen to be serving the people of Scotland competently then popular is a fair description and in no way a bad thing. Can’t see how Torcuil thinks he’s putting the boot in with that sneer.

      Can we expect a similar obliteration of the bold K***n H***e’s vomitting of words Rev.?

    83. Dr Jim says:

      I really really hope there’s a complete and total landslide SNP wipe out of every Yoon in the country at the election if only to demonstrate to these terrible people Scotland isn’t listening and Scotland doesn’t want them or their media

      BTW Just finished listening to Radio Scotland Gordon Brewer drivel where David Coburn shouted that all the other panelists were “Creatures”

      He should have his own telly show he’s a scream, he’s like a cartoon man off the Simpsons

      Also heard a speech by David Cameron where he said if we leave the EU we’re all going to die
      Vlad the impaler Putin will invade and all the terrorists in the world will come to the UK and kill us in our beds

      Positive campaigning there

    84. The Man in the Jar says:

      I’m reminded of this short extract from Pink Floyd’s song “Brain Damage” from the album Dark Side of the Moon.

      “The lunatic is in the hall.
      The lunatics are in my hall.
      The paper holds their folded faces to the floor
      and everyday the paper boy brings more.

    85. K1 says:

      I wonder what the likes of Torqued Too Tight are going to write about after the elections?

      These last minute’s gasping desperate attempts to conflate China/steel/Souter/cult/red kickers/nicola/corruption/SNP/Baaaad…before, whit they gonnae write about after?

      Oh that’s right: they’re fucked.

      Tally ho.

    86. Cuilean says:

      I note in the pictures, the two Yoons are wearing the same brogues! Wee shame.

      Personally, I prefer Nicola’s tartan stilettos, which will impress Chinese triads.

    87. katherine hamilton says:

      A couple of things.
      Where was the DR and its invective when the Chinese president was given the run of Buck House, when a deal was done for them to finance Hinckley Point? Ah that’s UK business, so OK then.
      Does the silly man think we can’t make links for ourselves?

      Secondly it’s not even very original insulting, just a rehash of old themes he’s bleated about before, on many different occasions.On the matter of trusting Nicola Sturgeon. Do some journalism. Check her approval ratings UK wide, never mind in Scotland.

      Thanks Rev for reading this for us. It is truly awful. If Mr. Crichton, and by extension his employers, the Labour Party and especially their Leaderene think clunking, insulting verbiage will bring the lost sheep back to the fold,well good luck with that.

      As Yoda Orbison says “I’ts oooooveeer”

    88. Grouse Beater says:

      If his editor had scruples he would dispense with Crichton’s services before spiking the article.

      But then, we know his editor encourages his crapology.

    89. Socrates MacSporran says:

      People, people, get a grip. The purpose of the Daily Record, as the official newsletter to the Scottish branch of the Labour Party has always been, to keep the plebs onside.

      Sadly, the plebs have by and large stopped listening, so, the DR is becoming ever more strident in trying to call them to heel.

      Torquil’s piece isn’t news, it is opinion dressed-up as news. It’s largely his opinion, so, we are free to ignore it.

      In any case, I have long considered the front two-thirds of the Record to be any old shite designed to even-up the number of pages supporting the two bits of the paper which are its (not-so) Unique Selling Point.

      These are Scotia in the racing pages and the latest hot gossip for the followers of the Bigot Brothers.

      As long as the three Ps – Punters, Proddies and Papes continue to buy the rag, all is well.

    90. G H Graham says:

      Torcuil, H***e, Nelson and the rest of their type (there’s a sad, long roll call of these B-list cringers) are only fearful of one thing; getting dumped by the British Establishment once Scotland votes for independence.

      Apart from the odd foreign correspondent’s sortie into Dumfries & Galloway, there won’t be any need in London for grovelling, proBritNat Scots willing to earn a living off their own self loathing.

      There will be plenty of Middle England neocons to lob the occasional jingoistic racist jibe just like today, except they won’t have anything like the competition they have now.

      FFS, let’s have our independence & be done with these brainwashed clowns.

      Footnote

      Since this is only my opinion of course, you can assume it to be journalistic fact, right Torcuil?

    91. Socrates MacSporran says:

      Cuilean wrote:
      “I note in the pictures, the two Yoons are wearing the same brogues!

      Brown brogues – the footwear of choice of the UKOK, true-blue, sash-wearing, marching, succulent lamb-eating Unionist.

    92. Returnofthemac says:

      As I leave my local newsagents with a copy of the National under my arm, I watch in dismay the number of people who almost automatically pick up a copy of the Daily Rag without thinking. I have to stop myself screaming ‘are you feckin mental’
      Thankfully, I have not purchased this shit for a number of years.
      I don’t think Torcuil Crichton likes the SNP.

    93. Albantawe says:

      “UK civil servant Sir Richard Heygate”
      Is Richard Heygate a civil servant? He appears from the link to be an adviser to the two Chinese companies.

    94. Bugger (the Panda) says:

      Having done business in China and several other Asiatic countries, Japan and South Korea excepted, you don’t get anywhere without some Lucre being pushed around. In Japan a gift from the home country to the head honcho, in my case always Malt, was deemed respectful but, bought no favours.

      China is the Wild East and the engagement of a family member of the Party or Company owner, as a consultant, before doing business is often useful.

      I seem to think that the Company with whom the ScotGov did the MOU also signed one with the ConLib UKGov some years ago.

      As for T C, I remember seeing a video of doing an interview with the last Labour Leader in a minibus whilst Miliband was going between venues in Scotland. The man had a ponsy scarf wrapped around his shoulders and was theatrically replacing it as it fell off the shoulder.

      He really loves himself.

      Maybe that is all he has got going for him apart from being smitten by Brian Wilson’s visceral hatred of the SNP. Or, maybe he knows the game is up at the Daily Record.

    95. Bugger (the Panda) says:

      The Dishonourable Crichton

    96. schrodingers cat says:

      unionists in melt down

      they can see the polls same as us
      their trumpets are being retired, bit by bit, some make a come back, like sarwar, but most are gone for good. this process will continue through the electoral cycle. nothing can stop that now.

      slab activists are a thing of the past and slab voters have dropped 10% since the referendum.

      how much further can slab support fall? even the tories are eyeing up the cadaver of that mighty political jugernaut.

      if TC is foaming at the mouth at the moment, he will need a straight jacket by the night of the results….lol hope he is on the bbc election night programme.

    97. HandandShrimp says:

      For al that Torquil and Wilson hate the SNP just remember that the hate is directly proportional to the depth of crap the Labour Party is in.

      This level of frenzy suggests that things are bleak indeed for their favoured rosette.

    98. yesindyref2 says:

      As I posted the other day, I found this about the China Railways Group, the GPFG and the Norweigan Council of Ethics.

      http://etikkradet.no/files/2015/01/Recommendation-CRG-10-October-2014.pdf

      Note this from the report: “At the end of 2013, the GPFG owned shares in CRG worth NOK 306,000,000, equivalent to a 0.47 per cent stake in the company.”

      So the GPFG had already invested in CRG, a relatively small amount of less than £30 million (45 million USD), a drop in the ocean compared to the total fund.

      So much for “other countries won’t touch it with a bargepole – Norway had ALREADY INVESTED.

      What they were doing in 2014 was checking out all GPFG investments after the event to see if there was corruption involved in the companies they were investing in.

      They asked questions, including about internal workings of the CRG. If they had had an MOU – a Memorandum Of Understanding – in place with CRG, which included, as in the Scottish Government one, setting up a “Framework of Confidentiality”, then perhaps CRG would have been more willing to answer their questions about matters which would probably be, in any normal company, classsified as “For Internal Use Only” – a fairly low level of congidentiality, but a neccessary one to avoid competitive oversight (basic industrial espionage!!!).

      The SG “Deal” with CRG was no more than setting up an MOU.

    99. Alba 46 says:

      Chrichton needs to go and lie down in a darkened room and when he has calmed down get an appointment with a shrink. This guy genuinely needs help. What a rant and even by the Retards non existing standards its totally over the top.

      He has difficulty in understanding what an MOU is. The poor deluded naval gazing buffoon is happy in his own SNP hating world. He is so bitter and twisted he has lost all sense of reality and objectiveness. He wouldn’t know balanced journalism if it landed on his SNP hating head.

      Just listened to the “Big Debate” on radio shortbread. Listening to Jenny Marra she is like a clone of Chrichton. If the SNP hadn’t been invented she would be speechless. It didn’t matter what the question was it was always the SNP’s fault. She is being touted as the next leader of SLAB. God help them.

      They think they are winning votes by this non stop slagging of the SNP. They seem to forget that the SNP are the democratically elected majority government in Edinburgh and currently have most of the Scottish MP’s in London. H’m wonder why that is? could it be that they are popular and SLAB are not. If they would spend more time telling the people of Scotland what SLAB stand for and less slagging the SNP they actually might get somebody to vote for them.

      Pathetic

    100. Norrie McCormick says:

      It is a shame that Brian Souter has thicker skin than others who have contributed to political parties and causes. I can think of others near to Perth who frequently bully others through the threat of courts. Learned of course from labour’s whiter than white sword of truth, Robert Maxwell.

      I would be interesting to see Chriton facing Mr Souter in court and defending his comments. I dare say Mr Souter has the wealth and clout to put the record out of business.

      As for use of Brian Wilson as a weapon, this is not a yesterday’s man, Wilson is a last century’s non entity parroting John McTernan.

    101. David Wardrope says:

      On a lighter note, I take it this is the same Torcuil Crichton that appears every so often on ‘An La’ on BBC Alba as Westminster correspondent then?

    102. Training Day says:

      Heh, that was a great laugh, Rev. You can picture the Record’s core demographic of the benighted grappling, albeit fleetingly, with the notion of Qatari poets. Then thinking that Sino Soutar is Soapy Soutar’s brother on flu medication.

      Utterly unable to ‘unnerstaun this pish’, they will turn quickly to the sports pages where yet more Warbs will salve any intellectual difficulties!

    103. Dr Jim says:

      STV news

      The hand over of Tata steel took place today and all the negotiations were down to the hard work of the Unions apparently

      Here was me thinking the Scottish government had something to do with that, I was clearly completely wrong eh

    104. Tam Jardine says:

      The online Record is just a dream to navigate, isn’t it?

      You find yourself trying to read an article by Kevin Hague. As if that is not strange enough you are prevented from doing so.

      Before you are able to read an article you have to answer some seemingly innocuous question like ‘how often do you plan meals- every day, every second day, once a week, once a year, never (yes never!) or prefer not to answer.’

      Once you have clicked on the answer, and no matter which answer you click on you are transported to an Arnold Clark site advertising motors where your only option is to either buy a car or close the site and try another option in vain. Bizarre AND crap.

    105. Macart says:

      @Dr Jim

      On Sky News however, the FM had a fair amount of air time dedicated to both Mr Cameron, regarding the the Panama leak and latterly what part the Scottish Government played in saving those jobs. The FM, quite generously I thought, offered to pass on any lessons learnt from our own experience on the matter to both the Labour administration in Wales and Mr Cameron’s government.

      Which was awfy nice. 🙂

    106. Hugh Kirk says:

      In whom do we trust? Nicla Sturgeon, One of the most capable, trusted and popular politician ever or Torcuil Crichton a jorno what writes pish for the Daily Retard?

    107. steveasaneilean says:

      Let’s not forget that Torcuil cut his journalistic teeth in the West Highland Free Press, Brian Wilson’s baby and long-standing mouth piece until he was unceremoniously chucked by the them.

      Brian initially joined the SNP before switching to (Not)Labour, at time when they were still Labour. He stood for and lost in 3 Highlands and Islands constituencies – in 1971, 1979 and 1983 – before discovering that actually his true heart lay in Ayrshire.

      He led the campaigning in Scotland in 1979 against a Scottish Assembly and has never accepted the current political and constitutional reality in Scotland.

      He voted in favour of the Iraq War and foundation hospitals and tuition fees at university and for introducing ID cards and for stricter asylum laws. But he din’t vote in favour of a wholly elected House of Lords. Way to go Brian!

      He simply comes across as a bitter and angry man is everything he writes and says. It’s quite sad really and even sadder that Torcuil thinks Brian is someone whose views matter in Scotland in 2016 and that they should somehow be respected.

    108. Robert Graham says:

      A shorter version of torn arses rant was posted by ALF on a piece by Derek Bateman on newsnet , innuendo filled ,fact free Junk, are they related ? just asking .

    109. Giving Goose says:

      That’s not a beard.

      It’s a fanny pulled up to tight.

      Bit like Torcuil, really.

    110. Brian Powell says:

      If the TATA works being saved was down to the unions, why haven’t they saved them in Wales? I wonder.

    111. Ian Brotherhood says:

      We were wondering, earlier, what Willie Rennie’s up to today…

      Well, guess what, he’s down on the farm.

      Now go on – imagine what might possibly go wrong when WWR turns up at a farm…go on…aye, you’re on the right lines…aye, it does involve pigs…yep, they do…aye, right behind him…

      Please check WOS Twiter, scroll down a bit. It’s just too good to be true.

      Anyone able to get that clip over here so non-Twitterers can see it?

      Seriously, it’ll make your day.

    112. Truth says:

      Mr T had it right: “I pity the fool…”

      Whenever I see our Torcuil or have the misfortune to read his “journalism” I feel nothing but pity for him.

      Where did his life go so wrong?

    113. Fiona says:

      It is laughable that someone who supported labour should get aereated about reliance on the leader. That is a regrettable trend in modern politics, but it is the MSM who led the charge to a presidential style. This is because they have more power if we vote on personalities not policies. They determine how the personality is presented and so have much more control. It really took off with Thatcher and Blair was positively messianic, as was noted at the time. Now we like someone they decided we should hate and they have gone off the idea. Well, that is not true. They just don’t understand their control has diminished and so they cry crocodile tears about their preferred model when it isn’t working for them

      I think he is truly muddled and resentful about loss of power for MSM. But not bright enough to really analyse what happened

    114. galamcennalath says:

      Torcuil really should consider a career in writing, fiction of course. He shows promise.

      Perhaps romantic fiction? All that passion needs an outlet. Any openings with Mills and Boon?

    115. People Carrier says:

      Daisy Walker says:
      8 April, 2016 at 12:28 pm
      In the style of mCGonigle

      Genius.

      What about one describing the collapse of a structure; a sociopolitical structure per chance?

    116. BrianW says:

      Good luck with trying to make any sense of it..

      The only place in seems to make any sense at all is in Torcuil’s frantic rabid brain.

      Roll on polling day, hopefully then Torcuil will suffer a breakdown..lol. Think Chief Inspector Dreyfus in ‘The Return of the Pink Panther’.

    117. call me dave says:

      The voters will have the opportunity to cross out Torquil and his labour cronies on their to do list on May 5th and beyond!

      Meanwhile elsewhere:

      Sturgeon annoys Dave.

      https://archive.is/EXmes

      Ardent supporters take over at Rennies photo op!

      https://archive.is/axVDC

    118. Patrick Roden says:

      Not Convinced says:

      I think I can see why an ex-Labour MP (and isn’t it interesting that’s described as “former minister” rather than “former MP”?) would bring up the Cash-for-Honours scandal …

      You see that was old-new-Labour who did that, whereas under the wondrous Corbyn they are now new-old-Labour. New-old-Labour are completely different to old-new-Labour who did that scandalous thing, and thus New-old-Labour would never do such a thing! Plus if we bring it up and mention the SNP at the same time, maybe some of the mud from that will stick to the SNP?

      oh Nooooooo!

      Just when I thought Labour couldn’t get any more confusing, along comes Not Convinced with this insight!

      Old New Labour or New Old Labour, and what about Kez, surely she’s New New Labour?

      I’m away for a lie down.

    119. Taranaich says:

      Can anyone come up with a reason why Brian Souter’s being named in all this? So far as I can see the only sources are from the Other Party, who make great hay from pointing out Mr Souter’s personal politics and business dealings while ignoring the giant Vitol-shaped planks in their own eyes.

      Also:

      “The Scottish Government, which press releases if the First Minister had mayonnaise on her chicken sandwich, said nout about it.”

      “Nout?” “NOUT?” The hell is “nout?” Is he so obsessed with “No” and SNP “Out” that he’s just portmanteaued the two words?

      (He means nowt, right?)

    120. findlay farquaharson says:

      uckin brilliant, this is precisely why i donate to this site

    121. Brian Powell says:

      Daily Record sales now below 160,000

    122. David Graham says:

      Those whom the gods would destroy they first make mad …

    123. yesindyref2 says:

      Half OT
      I see OBE is back on the Herald. Or at least someone calling hinself J McI OBE.

      That’ll increase the thread sizes by a factor of about 20.

    124. Jock Scot says:

      Fortunately for Torky the Twat(copyright YEW CHOOB!!), the untrustworthy Nicola has made mental health issues a priority so despite his protestations, he may be saved from himself. !

    125. cearc says:

      Ian B, here it is on Jamie Ross’s twitter –

      https://twitter.com/JamieRoss7/status/718408210999341056

      Willie Rennie,’ We like to organise our visits to send a message in pictorial terms…’

      It has to be one of the best ever political video clips!

    126. Karmanaut says:

      Isn’t that the guy who draws miseleading graphs for the Tories? I suppose it was only a matter of time until the Record went after the combined Labour and Tory unionist vote.

    127. Mikewr says:

      They have mad Kev as a columnist! A man carving out a niche in showing how poor scotland is in the union. FFS, I despair.

    128. Capella says:

      Brian Souter made money after Thatcher privatised public transport thus creating private monopolies which are licences to print money as Adam Smith pointed out.

      Labour were in power for 13 years and refused to renationalise transport.

      https://archive.is/W52O8

      If Scotland had been independent decades ago, Brian Souter would not be a transport millionaire. But he might still buy red trainers.

      If TC dislikes people making fortunes from privatised public services he should vote SNP and advise his readers likewise..

    129. cearc says:

      Warning! You would be well advised to empty your bladder and put coffee cups out of reach before watching the Willie Rennie clip!

    130. Phil Robertson says:

      HandandShrimp says:
      8 April, 2016 at 12:44 pm
      The only things missing are Trump

      Don’t worry, Richard Lochhead seems to have supplied that!

    131. Phil Robertson says:

      Taranaich says:
      8 April, 2016 at 2:42 pm
      Can anyone come up with a reason why Brian Souter’s being named in all this?

      Yes and you don’t have to look far.
      The possible developments from the deal include “transportation infrastructure”. Now go and look up which business Brian Soutar is in!

    132. shiregirl says:

      Torcuil has apparently gone ’round the pipe – a well known political hazard common in Yoons. His command of grammar and general punctuation was also pretty dire. But then, this is the Record.

      And what’s this? Dog chow man H***e writing for the Record?…scary fact that Record readers will probably believe his nonsense…

    133. muttley79 says:

      @Grouse Beater

      That tragedy for Crichton and his lickspittle like is how swiftly and without warning the British Establishment will dump him unceremoniously when it suits them.

      It probably is going to happen at some point. Shame 😀 😀

    134. Socrates MacSporran @ 1.38 pm.
      I cannot imagine your average Daily Record habituee stopping in their tracks as they flick through the pages en route to the Racing Section and fitba’news of the Mighty Two in World Football, just to read two full pages of ,frankly, pish. All those feckin’ words.

      If it were a piece in the Sun, there would be a tantalising photie of a former child star posing provocatively in a bikini on a satin cushion to celebrate her 16th Birthday.

      That would get ‘the lads’ attention.

      They still wouldn’t read this pish, though, but, mind.

      I am delighted that this scribe has produced this big bag of Doodoo so close to the polls..

      It tells us that Ruth, Kezia, and Oor Wullie have nothing to offer.

      From now on in, it will be Better Together carping on the sidelines, name calling, lies, and ultimately threats.

      I am unfamiliar with this man’s work since Elvis Presley was landing at Prestwick Airport on his way to Germany to do his military bit, the last time I even glanced at this ‘Working Class’ Thunderer.

      IT is clear that the author has lost it completely, and is to be pitied..strike that..laughed at.
      I’m sure it will be the talk of the steamie in my watering hole tonight.
      ‘See they Chinese. See that Brian Soutar. See That Nicola Sturgeon. Bastards.’

      That’s as terse a synopsis that I can manage.

      Keep up the good work, Torcuil. No really, churn out more of this nonsense, please. But remember a bums and tits photie the next time.

      (No not a group snap of the Scottish Labour Executive on their Spring Away Day.) Real bums and tits.

    135. Proud Cybernat says:

      “Mr Rennie explained: “We like to organise our visits [to the farm], to send a message in pictorial terms, exactly what we’re asking for.”

      A humping!?

      Genius pigs.

    136. ronnie anderson says:

      I would have liked to have seen the 1st draft of that story TeeHeeHee. The Daily Redcoat will soon have Elbow patches same as Torcuil.

    137. Marcia says:

      Is it a coincidence that ray of sunshine, Phil, always appears just before an election.

    138. Clarinda says:

      cearc – 3.12 pm

      Should that not be pigtorial terms?

    139. Sassenach says:

      The Wee Wullie clip is one of the funniest, already forwarded it around friends!!

    140. Lollysmum says:

      Just in 🙂

      The art of the possible

      Dear ???,
      Today I attended the handover ceremony for the Clydebridge and Dalzell steelworks.

      The sale is good news for Lanarkshire, and for Scottish manufacturing.

      Of course, this isn’t the first time that we have stepped in to protect a key national asset.
      With our help a new buyer was found for the Ferguson shipyard in Port Glasgow. Under that new ownership, the yard is winning public contracts and expanding its workforce.
      We also took Prestwick Airport into public hands – protecting over 1,300 local jobs and an asset which contributes more than £60 million to the Scottish economy.
      And let’s not forget that when the Tories tried to cut Scotland’s budget by £7 billion, we saw them off.
      That’s the benefit of having a government that stands up for Scotland.
      Share these achievements to persuade your family and friends to re-elect a Scottish Government that works for Scotland.
      Remind them to vote SNP on both ballot papers.
      Only the SNP has the strength, the unity and the vision to keep Scotland moving forward.

      Nicola Sturgeon
      SNP Leader

    141. Kenny says:

      “How far can we trust Sturgeon to get cosy with Qatar and China?”

      This headline sentence does not even make sense.

      It suggests that the writer WANTS the FM to “get cosy” with Qatar and China…. but can we trust her to do it?

      Once again, the unionist press scores an own goal and Scots with working brains are driven into the YES movement — if they were not there already!

    142. cearc says:

      Proud Cybernat,

      It may be the pigs using ‘sign’ language to express their feelings about being visited by Willie?

    143. ronnie anderson says:

      @ cearc Wullie Rennie,s Libdems, it could,nt be more graphic.ly demonstrated

      LibDems Getting Hump’d

    144. ronnie anderson says:

      @ cearc forgot to add PMSL

    145. yesindyref2 says:

      Good campaigning idea for the LibDems though.

      “The Liberal Democrats make you randy”.

      That would be a vote winner.

    146. Proud Cybernat says:

      Willie Rennie: “We’re in the middle of an election camppaign. These things happen.”

      #shaggate

    147. Marcia says:

      yesindyref2

      Oh dear. Shan’t show that to the other half.

    148. Ian Brotherhood says:

      Where ‘willie’ go next?

      Has he been to a baker’s shop yet? Or a candlestick-maker’s?

      Doesn’t matter where he goes, it’s aye ‘Carry On Down The LibDem Lavvy’ with WWR.

      Pure gold…

    149. Fireproofjim says:

      Willkie Rennie and his porcine pals!! Great clip.
      He was on the news last night with some Eagles. I think he said that if the Lib Dems form the next Holyrood parliament everybody gets a free eagle, or something like that. He was making more sense than usual.

    150. Breeks says:

      Ach, that’s a tough one. Who can we trust?

      Don’t trust Nicola Sturgeon because she made a deal with China, or don’t trust the Westminster Government responsible for the McCrone Report, all that the McCrone Report entails, and keeping it secret for decades and costing Scotland billions upon billions and having the solid brass neck to deny it?

      Maybe the BBC will have a reliable, objective perspective on the issue… I’ll never know. I don’t visit the Westminster propagandists anymore given the risk of radioactive contamination. Just can’t be too careful with toxic pollution.

      Jeez, I just can’t decide… Should we toss a coin? The pound coin maybe? Let’s see how far we can toss the UK pound.

      Mind you, if my first name was Torcuil, I think there’s a chance that I might have been simmering at gas mark 3 for my whole life too. I think you’re done Torcuil, I think you’re done…

    151. David Smith says:

      What a lovely graph that is.
      Going by the dynamic displayed there, the Record should flatline just about the time the first SLAB ex-councillors are making their court appearances. 🙂

    152. Proud Cybernat says:

      Erratum:

      Willie Rennie: “We’re in the middle of an election camppaign. These things humpin.”

      #humpgate

    153. yesindyref2 says:

      @Marcia
      Maybe the one I came up with for the herald?

      “Who needs viagra when you have Willie Rennie?”

    154. Dr Jim says:

      @Lollysmum: The art of the possible

      The disgrace is, we have to share it because the media in Scotland won’t report Scottish Government achievement as a good thing

      This alone displays the commitment and patience the SNP have to the end game
      They could waste their time and energy fighting against the status quo but they just keep getting on with the job

      For tenacity 10/10…. SNPx2

    155. Albaman says:

      It just shows you what the Record was able to print, pre Internet,without anyone able to publicly questioning the article, and I don’t think that even now, the “Record” has realised just how much the Internet has been the form which holds such published misinformation to account.
      And they certainly did not recognise just how influential Stew, and his “Wings o Scotland” would become, and remain the dominant blog which would, and can hold the printed press to account .
      You’ve got them by “the short hairs” Stew, now—-squeeze!!!.

    156. Marcia says:

      yesindyfer2

      WR/LD’s give you instant headaches. 🙂

    157. michael diamond says:

      That beard hides a weak chin, like the man.

    158. Capella says:

      @ ronnie anderson
      That video was so funny I had to stop watching after the first sentence. The Daleks are coming. Exterminate!

    159. ronnie anderson says:

      @ Capella James Scott questioned me at Dundee Demo as to why the Rev had a go at Scottish Resistance

      Sharpen up yer keyboard Rev an kick erse.

    160. Valerie says:

      2 hilarious vids in one thread.

      I’m sure the Scottish Resistance frontman was wishing he had the foresight to laminate his speech, thereby resisting the Scottish weather.

      I was impressed that the 4/5 behind him were well prepared with laminated pics of some helmeted type of old.

      And then there’s Mr Sheridan, a long way from those packed halls in the run up to the referendum.

      I tried not to laugh, and failed. I have a sneaky regard for their adventures, cos they believe in what they are doing. Bless.

    161. yesindyref2 says:

      @Marcia
      LibDems stuck in a rut?

    162. ronnie anderson says:

      Declaration of Glasgow.

      Caw me ah Pedant, should that statement not read as We the People of Glasgow.

      Thank fek they didnae go tae Ecclefechan

    163. Luigi says:

      cearc says:

      8 April, 2016 at 3:12 pm

      Ian B, here it is on Jamie Ross’s twitter –

      https://twitter.com/JamieRoss7/status/718408210999341056

      Willie Rennie,’ We like to organise our visits to send a message in pictorial terms…’

      It has to be one of the best ever political video clips!

      LOL this could go viral! Well it would if Rennie was actually well known. :):):)

    164. Valerie says:

      Wee Rennie going viral.

      Huffpo circulating it now.

    165. ian says:

      This guys a walking ,talkin livin clown.

    166. I remember there was a BBC hack that went tonto when shrieking at Nicola during the start of Frenchgate,

      I think it was the lickspittle James Cook,

      it was not long after, that the BBC prudently shipped him out of the country,

      it is time the editor of the rag DR sent poor mad Torcuil away from Scotland for a couple of years until he hopefully regains what little sanity he had.

    167. call me dave says:

      Radio shortbread visits the Steel mill in Scotland for the handover to new owners as it waves goodbye to TATA.

      Interview with the new owner from Liberty and a ‘commutiny based’ employee with some hazy background with a (reference to a task force set up) etc etc.

      That’s all folks…the SG were never involved… funny old world!

      Init! 🙁 Good old auntie.

    168. Luigi says:

      Just watched humpgate again – oh ma poor sides! LOL

      You have to give Mr Rennie credit, what a star – talk about perfect timing. 🙂

    169. Clapper57 says:

      FFS scraping bottom of barrel, shows BT mob just cannae let go they are soooooo Yoonited .

      DR will definitely not ‘Winalot’ of favour using one of Ruth’s wee helpers why I never knew KH was a wee ‘Pal’ of DR personally I think with his ‘Pedigree’ I certainly wouldn’t want to be his ‘Chum’ fir sure . The tail wagging the dog ??

      Kevin Hague’s diary :

      Monday : Graph for the Tories
      Tuesday : Graph for the Lib Dems
      Wednesday : Graph for the Labour party
      Thursday : Graph for Graph’s sake
      Friday : Column with graph for Daily Record
      Saturday : Graph for next appearance on BBC Scotland 2016
      Sunday : Graph for next week’s graphs

      Think they’re both graphing at straws …again.

    170. Socrates MacSporran says:

      Jack Colatin @ 3.28pm

      Good post, just one wee thing, Elvis popped into Prestwick Airport on his way back to the USA after completing his military service.

      My late wife took the afternoon off school to see him – we still have the photograph. She got all Hell from the school after her picture was in the Daily Retard.

    171. Lollysmum says:

      Clapper57

      Very good especially the last line 🙂

    172. MJS Dundee says:

      It isn’t ‘nout’, it’s ‘nowt’ – the loon’s an eejit an’ cannae spell.

      That aside, please oh please someone revive Spitting Image and have them do a spoof music video “The Final Meltdown” starring SLab and their hangers’ on.

      Kezia, Jabba, The Torquill, The Burd etc. all in stripey 80s spandex wi’ perms and pointy guitars … . [They do the heid-bangin’ bit anyway].

      … Ach wait a tick, that one’s already taken – The [Tories in] Final Meltdown by Europe. Or over Europe. Or something like that.

      Do porkers like/wear spandex? Cameron in spandex …, no, that’s too much, aaaaaargh. Ok, I’ll just go shoot myself, it’ll be less painful. [Except I can’t, because the SNP-bad govt has banned all the guns].

    173. Macart says:

      @Ian Brotherhood

      Oh, that’s brilliant. 😀 ROFLMAO

      Timing is everything.

    174. Stoker says:

      Marcia wrote:
      “You should take over his space on that newspaper and let readers see what proper journalism should be.”

      NAW! NEVER! We don’t want that rag to survive.
      _________________________

      BTW, there’s a massive difference between this article and the one by Tory Quill, this article will get read. I wouldn’t let my polecat waste its urine on BUM rags never mind me reading them.

    175. Taranaich says:

      Yes and you don’t have to look far.
      The possible developments from the deal include “transportation infrastructure”. Now go and look up which business Brian Soutar is in!

      The answer: not transportation infrastructure. Stagecoach are bus and rail operators. Transportation infrastructure means building & maintaining roads, railways, terminals and parking spaces, not the vehicles that use them. Or are you going to suggest Harley Davidson builds bus shelters and pipelines?

    176. Jimbo says:

      No wonder the Daily Record’s sales are going down the tubes – they have a political correspondent who types with his forehead.

    177. Doug`s dad says:

      Ruthie Tank commander is on Clarkston High Street now with a trusty band of followers, maybe 9 or 10 , no members of the public just followers so when the inevitable crowd shot appears thats who is in the picture. Strangely enough loitering about at the bus stop are a pair of police officers, don,t remember seeing that for other parties, maybeshe and they`re not quite as popular as they think

    178. Returnofthemac says:

      O/T just heard the 4.30 blah blah c news in the car should have turned off but I was waiting to hear the praise being heaped upon the Scottish government for helping with the steel jobs in Scotland. Well, it did get a mention. Then it was toodle oooo the noo. Talking about the 4 parties and what they were up to today. 1st Ruthie 2nd oor Wullie, 3rd kez. And then last and least the first minister of Scotland. FFS.

      SNPx2

    179. Returnofthemac says:

      Re my last post, forgot to mention the greens were number 3 kez in at number 4 and Nicola last. Just where the British Biased Corporation want her.

      SNP x2

    180. Nana says:

      Meant to add to the above post, Jimmy should be asked if he has altered his tax affairs in order to pay up,

      More on Cameron’s dodge

      http://politicalscrapbook.net/2016/04/david-cameron-did-not-declare-his-earnings-from-the-offshore-fund-either/

    181. Brian says:

      Brilliant, just brilliant. A Pulitzer, surely?

    182. Robert J. Sutherland says:

      Oh nicely dissected, Rev Stu. I also couldn’t help laughing (though one shouldn’t mock the obviously afflicted).

      I’m almost sorry that the Daily (Broken) Record has such a declining readership, since the more normal people who read this sort of yoony ranting, the more I reckon they are likely to vote the other way!

    183. Ian Brotherhood says:

      Up to today this was my favourite-ever Rennie clip. Seems he has a stimulating effect on everyone he encounters…(45secs)

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kBEsx1Mul8M

    184. Flower of Scotland says:

      My LibDem/Tory friends are getting more bitter by the day! They can’t understand where I get all my information from and why I’m so upbeat.

      I’ve told them to read Wings but they read the Scotsman, Herald and Courier. “You’re not doing well they tell me” (my windows are a beacon of SNP posters) with a growl.

      I’m not sure why they are so miserable. They, the silent majority, won the Referendum! Ha,ha!

    185. Bob Mack says:

      Smacks of desperation frankly. When you think irrationally,you write irrationally.

    186. Alan McHarg says:

      If you can’t play the ball, play the man. The MSM did this, with some success, to Alex Salmond during the referendum campaign.

    187. Ian Brotherhood says:

      …and here’s Willie going down the zipwire t’other day.

      Strangely, he doesn’t say a single word so there’s not a shred of solid evidence that it’s actually him…

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t2vxxKe_-sk

    188. Gary45% says:

      Typical Yoon journo, no facts, make up the story, then cry foul when the truth comes out.

      This will be the same shady Chinese company that have been proven not to be shady.
      Message to Torky,” If its in the Record it can’t be true”
      TICK TOCK.
      SNPx2

    189. HandandShrimp says:

      Loved Willie’s clip…to be fair to him I think he realises that the pigs have upstaged him and he rolls with it.

      Nice distraction for Dave though…take his mind off all those bothersome overseas investments.

    190. Robert J. Sutherland says:

      Re Cameron’s financial dodging, I heard a curious little snippet on the radio news yesterday lunchtime – the German Green MSP Sven Giegold revealed that Cameron manoevered successfully in the European Parliament to block offshore trusts from being made open (unlike companies), leaving a nice little loophole. And his bagman for the job was [Sir] Graham Watson MSP. The LibDem. Now ex-MSP.

      Should someone tell Willie…?

    191. Legerwood says:

      The Chinese [no] deal is going to rumble on therefore the more information we have to counteract what has been some very most unbalanced reporting (understatement of the week) the better. The possible outcome if this Chinese investment going ahead is more jobs and housing just for starters both of which are badly needed. Has anyone asked any of the other party leaders how they are going to attract jobsand investment to Scotland? Has Ms Dugdale said how she is going to finance her 60,000 houses?

      At least one of the companies, Sinofortune, has quite a few billions worth of projects on the go with a wide range of partners in the UK. Below is a post, not by me, from an earlier thread that has lots of good info in it to counteract what has been said elsewhere.

      “”” stewartb says:
      5 April, 2016 at 5:30 pm
      This fuss in the media over the MOU with Chinese investors is just downright silly. Although there are always important strategic issues to consider over the nature of inward investment facilitated by the public sector, the Chinese parties to this MOU seem serious and interesting players. What follows is just for background – apologies for length. (By the way, it was assembled in less than 30 minutes research online – so no excuse for even resource strapped journalists!)

      According to its web site: ’SinoFortone (UK) Group is a multi-cultural Joint Venture (JV) between Sinolinks Group and Fortone Group’, two Chinese corporations. Based in London, the SinoFortune UK web site lists amongst its current UK “partners”:

      University of Cambridge
      Kirklees Council
      Birmingham City Council
      Nottingham City Council
      City of Stoke on Trent City Council
      Kent County Council.

      Existing SinoFortone investments in the UK include:

      Crossrail 2 – new rail line linking London, Surrey and Hertfordshire

      Waterside Luxury Village, Cornwall – part of SinoFortone’s stated intention of investing more than £250 million in the tourism infrastructure of the UK, focusing on historic refurbishments and new buildings based within close proximity to London, Edinburgh, The Lake District and Cornwall

      London Paramount – major new theme park in north Kent: Sinofortone intends to invest £3.2bn

      Cambridge South – science park plus 1,200 new homes and a country park, with Jesus College, University of Cambridge

      The HD One – Huddersfield – mixed use urban development combining leisure, entertainment, hospitality and sport with additional specialist retail, office, and residential elements

      Smithfield – Stoke-on-Trent – new commercial business quarter comprising 1.2m sq ft of office, retail and hotel space.

      SinoFortone Group is also investing £2bn in two innovative biomass plants and associated food production facilities in Wales, at Holyhead and Port Talbot “that will create 1,000 jobs and thousands more during the construction phase”. The investment commitment from SinoFortone was confirmed at the start of the recent official visit of Chinese President Xi Jinping to the UK.

      SinoFortone’s delivery partner in these biomass plants is the Orthios Group. The latter’s web site describes the Holyhead development as follows:

      “We are creating a 299 MWe Orthios Energy Centre and Eco Park in Penhros, Holyhead, which will comprise:

      -a 299 MWe biomass power station within the existing consented scheme

      – the world’s largest on-land prawn growing facility (aquaculture)

      – a large soil-less indoor vegetable growing facility (hydroponics)

      – the world’s first home compostable food packaging facility

      – the Combined Food and Power Centre of Excellence, with Bangor University

      – research and development

      – a deep water port jetty for bulk import.

      The energy centre forms the core around which each of the Orthios Eco Park businesses will operate. There will be 5 independent 60 MWe power modules and we will gasify approximately 1.5 million metric tonnes of biomass per year. It is expected that we will be able to provide 650 thousand homes with electricity by 2020. The excess heat and CO2 will be recycled into the Eco Park to be reused for enhancing the cultivation of fish and vegetables.”

      With SinoFortone as a key investor, the longer term aim is to roll out the technology developed in the two power plants in Wales to China and developing countries.

      And notably, the BBC reported in 2015 a spokesman for the Labour-controlled Welsh government stating: “We welcome any further progress on these two projects, which have the potential to create hundreds of jobs and provide a major boost for the local economy.” (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-wales-34571043 )

      SinoFortone is also involved in developing new metro systems for both Kuwait and Abu Dhabi.”””

    192. Robert J. Sutherland says:

      Oh, correction to my last posting, I should have (twice) written MEP, not MSP. I’m too focussed on the upcoming election, it seems…

    193. Socrates Mac Sporran @5.11
      My Everlovin’ is an Elvis nut, also. Word perfect on all the tunes…Don’t tell her that I got it wrong !

      I’m more an American Songbook kinda guy.

      I repeat; things must be desperate in the Better Togteher Communications Room if they are reduced to churning out this drivel dressed up as fact.
      I doubt anybody’s interested in Crichton’s pathological hatred of Nicola Sturgeon & Co.
      Independence : I just can’t help believin’.

      Torcuil has left the building.

    194. Nana says:

      @Robert J Sutherland

      Here’s a link to the letter Cameron wrote re trusts.

      http://uk.businessinsider.com/david-camerons-offshore-trust-letter-2016-4

    195. Tinto Chiel says:

      “Brown brogues – the footwear of choice of the UKOK, true-blue, sash-wearing, marching, succulent lamb-eating Unionist.”

      Hey, Socrates, they can be a valuable addition to a gentleman’s wardrobe, particularly when combined with blue jeans with turn-ups. Don’t diss my vibe, man (don’t know what that means either).

      “But we’re moved by his sudden concern for poetry.” Classic: oh, the banter!

      Silly Cringer Crichton should be made to write a hundred times: Nicola Sturgeon saved the Clydebridge and Dalzell works.

      I love that graph of the DR sales. The same graph is now being used to track Willie Rennie’s credibility after Gammongate. Hope Cams didn’t see it, we don’t want him overstimulated just now.

    196. Robert J. Sutherland says:

      Nicely linked, Nana!

      Judging by what I heard, a lot of MEPs were very pi**ed off!

    197. ronnie anderson says:

      @ Ian Brotherhood Ah,ll send wullie ah wee song Slip Sliding AWAY

    198. HandandShrimp says:

      Ledgerwood

      Of course the fact that SinoFortone are a sound company will be ignored by the press.

      The parent company of CR3EG did get embroiled in Chinese politics and bribery and a number of high ranking individuals, mainly civil servants, were given death and jail sentences and I think the company chairman committed suicide. However, the parent company itself is huge and has 20 or more subsidiaries including the one party to this agreement. I am not convinced that the CR3EG have been involved in any wrong doing but perhaps Crichton would like to stick his neck out and accuse them of something.

    199. Morgatron says:

      Squeal little Willie ,squeal. Not quite Ned Beattie , but loved seeing that wee dick shoveling up his his verbal shit. Just wish that rampant pig managed to get his trotters wrapped round him.

    200. Ruby says:

      Why are these two goons dressed up in identical outfits?

    201. Ian Brotherhood says:

      Here’s Willie Rennie on top of a mountain…

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vp_GMHMxMPI

    202. JLT says:

      It must be some place to work at when it comes to the good old Daily Record. Conspiracies theories must be literally writing themselves on the Record‘s Laptops and PC’s these days, while it must be one almighty punch up in the Editorial Room whenever it comes to what should dominate the front page; SNP Baaad v the Rangers!

      But we must be wondering how long the Daily Record will last. When, why and how? And when it does …I think many of us will celebrate with a wee dram.

    203. I wonder no I’ll be willing to bet that Torquil Crichton will be on some politics programme before long (within a few days) seeking revenge for being shown to be the fool that he is.

    204. galamcennalath says:

      Re Record circulation. From the graph at the top it will reach zero around 2021. However, it will cease to be viable before then. Dead in 3years? No tears!

    205. Robert Louis says:

      Tonight out of curiosity, I decided to watch the blatantly biased and propagandist BBC ‘reporting Scotland’, for their coverage of the saving of the Scottish steel works, achieved by the SNP Scottish Government.

      They covered it, yet somehow failed to mention these words AT ALL ‘Nicola Sturgeon’, or First Minister’. For those who are unaware, it was the Scottish Government who worked tirelessly since January to secure this new deal for Scottish steel.

      In the report, no mention was made of the role of the Scottish Government, other than once, in passing, saying a support package had been backed by the Scottish Government. Nicola Sturgeon was present at the ceremony today, yet was not seen or heard at all on the BBC report.

      This was then followed by a journo to journo chat in the studio, with Douglas Fraser, who came across as a man whose glass is really half empty. Not one good word to say about the takeover, nor anything positive to say about the work the Scottish Government had done to secure the deal. Indeed he even questioned the role of the Scottish Government, saying ‘it is not yet clear why the Scottish Government had to be involved’.

      That, if we ever needed proof, is clear as day evidence, that the BBC in pacific Quay Glasgow, is totally biased against the SNP, the Scottish Government and is merely a London run propagandist outfit. The BBC is a wholly disreputable organisation, that is an affront to democracy.

      You really should watch it on iplayer, just to see how awful the BBC has become.

    206. ahundredthidiot says:

      Just wait until the DR get their hands on the Panama papers leak where miss sturgeon made 623 billion quid from dodgy off shore company dealings.

      Even the yoons in my work now regard the DR as an embarrassment.

    207. Croompenstein says:

      @Legerwood –

      Listen to manifesto ripping crazed yoon loon Glenn Campbell rewriting history and trying to keep the China story going. Listen to Sir Richard Heygate’s incredulous responses to the ‘crazy speak’ of the mad ukok yoons..

      Starts at 01:36:00 to 01:42:06

      http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b074zz1k#play

      Folk must see me in the car shouting and banging the wheel I really need to stop listening to this horse piss..

    208. gordon ford says:

      Sorry to be O/T .But did you see Rennie in the pigstye on RS.
      He was wittering on about how the Fib Dems to things differently when just over his left shoulder two pigs started to become romantically inclined…………….
      At the end of the clip Sally Magnusson said “Im not saying anything”
      Have a look at it guys…………….

    209. ScottishPsyche says:

      An amusing and wry Brian Taylor commentary taking the P out of Willie Rennie on Distorting Scotland tonight.

      However, yet again the unchallenged assertion is made by Ruth Davidson that 150 000 vocational College Places have been cut.

      The SNP really have to get the truth out on this one soon.

    210. Andy-B says:

      Does anyone pay attention to Crichton or the Daily Record anymore?

      Clegg and Crichton lost any little credibility they had left during the independence referendum.

      The unionist gutter rag that they work for, the Daily Record sold Scotland out, the sooner it folds the better.

    211. starlaw says:

      Good old Wullie Rennie “we like to send our members a pictorial message off what we are about”
      Two pigs humping in the background.
      Could not have made this story up {-8

    212. neil bruce says:

      Ruby @ 6.48

      I suspect they are dressed the same way because they are about to change into their alter egos, pet shop boy and the chinless wonder.

    213. Tinto Chiel says:

      On reflection, I apologise for suggesting at 6:38 that Willie Rennie had ANY credibility.

      That was just silly.

    214. ArtyHetty says:

      All O/T

      LOL! I did a search for, ‘willie rennie and the two pigs’ thinking nothing would come up, but no, it’s gone viral!

      Well so far, had two tory leaflets through the post, must be costing them a bit.
      The Electoral Commission ‘Scottish Parliamment voting guide’, however was well hidden inside junk mail..hmmm.

    215. Macart says:

      @Robert Louis

      Beeb being predictable as ever then.

      As for why the Scottish Government got involved? They do know google is their friend surely?

      I seem to recall both the media and political opponents DEMANDING the Scottish Government do something, anything to prevent the loss of steel jobs in Scotland.

      Well? They did. Just as they did for Prestwick airport, Grangemouth and Ferguson shipyard. They are the party of government and acted accordingly. Now perhaps if the SG had the full powers over taxation, energy, coal and oil devolved, the north east may not find itself in such a dire employment situation currently. How and ever we were assured some nineteen months ago that only with the broad shoulders of the union would something, something, something… etc.

    216. Croompenstein says:

      Oor Alex interviewed on Canadian TV.. he has a wee dig at Trump but further down the page is the full interview…

      http://www.cbc.ca/news/politics/alex-salmond-donald-trump-1.3522337

    217. Ruby says:

      Ian Brotherhood says:
      8 April, 2016 at 2:20 pm

      We were wondering, earlier, what Willie Rennie’s up to today…

      Well, guess what, he’s down on the farm.

      Now go on – imagine what might possibly go wrong when WWR turns up at a farm…go on…aye, you’re on the right lines…aye, it does involve pigs…yep, they do…aye, right behind him…

      Please check WOS Twiter, scroll down a bit. It’s just too good to be true.

      Anyone able to get that clip over here so non-Twitterers can see it?

      Seriously, it’ll make your day.

      Ruby replies

      I’ll give it a try. Finger crossed it will work!

      http://tinyurl.com/zcrr3kz

    218. robert esquierdo says:

      When I read these two this morning I immediately thought of the Rev. I knew he would be onto it like a ferret on to a rabbits neck./ These two must think that the Scottish people are all as thick as sh-te on a weans nappy. What a pair of idiots

    219. Almannysbunnet says:

      @ Scot Finlayson says:
      I remember there was a BBC hack that went tonto when shrieking at Nicola during the start of Frenchgate

      Yes and James Cook was duly punished by being sent off as the BBC overseas correspondent in California. Harsh punishment that, bound to discourage others from doing the same. NOT!

    220. ArtyHetty says:

      The link works Ruby, it fills the while screen, be warned!

      The worrying thing is, what on earth was he actually talking about? ‘Someone somewhere’ will work it out ‘somehow’. Oh my god, how much is he paid to spout such utter pish? He is living in the land of oz, or somewhere, somehow, someone, anyone?

      Was J.lamonty partly right? Not programmed and all that? :-)(

    221. call me dave says:

      O/T

      http://myp2p.ec/

      Lots of choice: Hearts V Aberdeen is mine KO now.

    222. stewartb says:

      To emphasise the point made by someone in an earlier post, the China Railway Group (CRG) does NOT appear on the current list of excluded companies from Norway’s ‘Government Pension Fund Global’ (see: http://www.nbim.no/en/responsibility/exclusion-of-companies/ ). So the exclusion recommendation in 2014 seems to have been rejected.

      The Council of Ethics that made that recommendation has in the recent past made similar recommendations about companies such as Alstom and Siemens, neither appear on the current list of excluded companies.

      Notably, CRG subsidiaries are involved with major contracts internationally. Two examples of infrastructure projects follow.

      As reported by Bloomberg in September 2015 (http://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2015-09-17/china-u-s-reach-agreement-on-high-speed-rail-before-xi-visit), a China Railway Group-led consortium and XpressWest Enterprises LLC have formed a joint venture to build a high-speed railway linking Las Vegas and Los Angeles, the first Chinese-made bullet-train project in the US  “The project comes after four years of negotiations and will be supported by $100 million in initial capital.”

      As reported in China Daily in November 2015 (http://europe.chinadaily.com.cn/business/2015-11/26/content_22519520.htm ), the China Railway Group Limited has announced one of its subsidiaries has won the Hungary-Serbia rail contract with another Chinese company and a Hungarian peer. The consortium will jointly construct the Hungarian section of the railway, which links the Serbian and Hungarian capitals. The contract is estimated to be worth about $1.57 billion. As part of this, a formal cooperation agreement has been signed between the Chinese and Hungarian governments.

    223. Brian Doonthetoon says:

      Well done Ruby!

      I tried umpteen ways to download it with no success but your link let ‘Video Downloadhelper’ capture it.

      Thank you!

    224. Undeadshaun says:

      Sorry to post this again, but must be the most hilarious clip in ages.

      https://mobile.twitter.com/BBCPhilipSim/status/718400480548941825

      Willie Rennie “we like to send a message in pictorial terms exactly what we’re asking for, and I think this does it very well today, somebody , somewhere, somebody will work it out at some point.”

      Yes Willie it does send pictorial message and its not hard to work it out, the Lib dems are f***ed!

    225. Grouse Beater says:

      When I worked at BBC Scotland you gathered in the office of any member of staff who got allocated to BBC London and congratulated them.

      He or she got applause, slapped on the back, congratulated, given a bunch of flowers, or taken to the pub for a celebratory drink.

      BBC London was seen as the ultimate goal, promotion.

      Ask Ken Bruce.

      You applauded your colleague because you unconsciously accepted BBC Scotland was a backwater province, and only a stint at BBC Tweed or Orkney could be worse.

      Without anybody’s help, well, perhaps STV, BBC Scotland repackaged the ‘Scottish Cringe’ as an indelible national characteristic.

      And that’s been its role in emulation and honour of Harry lauder since its inception.

    226. Colmat says:

      @ Rrobert Louis,

      STV went one better, on the 6.00 news they managed to report the Scottish Steel developments without mentioning the Scottish Governments involvement or negotiations.

    227. Ian Brotherhood says:

      @Grouse Beater –

      Can’t help wondering to what extent such cringe informed BBC Scotland material like this:

      Gregor Fisher, Naked Video (early 80’s?) –

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HqOQAl_MrcM&nohtml5=False

    228. Effijy says:

      Mr Roadkill Crisison must live under a rock somewhere dark.

      After the Rev’s Revelations, he must want the earth to swallow him whole. (Willing helper available)

      What a miserable way to earn a living.
      Distort, Lie, and Confuse the facts for the gullible.

      He originates from the Piles of Lewis too.
      Such nice people there, I can see why he had to relocate.

      Does anyone know if one of Brian Souter’s buses knocked him down when he was young?

      His constant bickering about the man, on unrelated matters, is really quite pathetic.
      Roadkill obviously doesn’t have an editor, or at least one with an interest in journalism.

      Every bit as pathetic as the Slab Accounting Unit he supports.

    229. Ruby says:

      Brian Doonthetoon

      Here’s what I did

      https://savedeo.com/en

      pasted in

      https://twitter.com/BBCPhilipSim/status/718400480548941825

      click download

      You will see red button saying download.
      First click redirects to ads
      Just click off ads and click red download button again.
      Then you can right click and save with whatever software you have for downloading videos.

      I used ‘save me video’. It’s an MP4 file.

      Handbrake will convert to whatever format you want. You might want ‘Willie & the Dirty Pigs’ on your Android/Kindle for example. 🙂

      Handbrake is great & it’s free.
      https://handbrake.fr/

    230. Bob Mack says:

      If you watch Scotland The Promised Land, it details quite graphically how BBC London control systematically set out to destroy the Scots language. Very informative and unbiased documentary.

      What we see today is only an extension of that aim,but conducted by Scots in the pay of those same people.

    231. Clootie says:

      …been away for a few days and it looks like the “Scottiish media”, especially Torid the teller of tales, have finally flipped

    232. galamcennalath says:

      Grouse Beater says:

      “BBC London was seen as the ultimate goal, promotion.”

      …. in the same way as Labour politicians in Scotland viewed Westminster.

      That ended abruptly last May 😉

    233. Almannysbunnet says:

      Willie is no great politician. His future clearly lays in comedy. His timing is immaculate.
      It is rumored that, shortly after his stellar appearance, he received a heavy breathed phone call from Cammers asking for the whereabouts of the piggery.

    234. heedtracker says:

      Ask Ken Bruce.

      Scotch cringing is bad for you. Oor Eddie looks like he’s melting now.

      http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/scottish-news/scots-radio-host-eddie-mair-4977211#IVPCBCLPjIxW2kLr.97

      BBC r4 spends hundreds of millions a year, telling tory England they or it is the greatest ever in the whole wide world but they tend to get BBC Scotland Scotch cringers to ask them to explain why, they are really are the greatest in the wide world.

      If I did that for a living, I’d probably be a piss artist too.

    235. Scott says:

      O/T
      “The schools were all built as part of the city’s private finance programme”: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-edinburgh-east-fife-36001065
      I hope the companies who built these schools are going to be held responsible for the cost of the repairs and not the council or the Government,I bet the Dug will try and put this down to the fault SNP.

    236. Grouse Beater says:

      Ian: “Gregor Fisher, Naked Video”

      Spot on!

      About as racist, patronising, and cringe worthy as we can get. (‘Local Hero’ treated Highland folk in the same way but nobody seem to notice because the music was so good.)

    237. Famous15 says:

      Most here are too kind to Crichton. The Daily Record clearly polled a group to try to establish why the SNP was so popular. The top result would have been that Nicola Sturgeon is trusted by the people. Crichton ,on behalf of SLAB,set out to demolish that trust. He is not stupid he is utterly corrupt. He makes the Chinese business people smell fragrant!

    238. Tam Jardine says:

      Sad to hear so many schools in Edinburgh are being kept closed after Easter due to suspect PFI works carried out in the bad ole slab PFI days over a decade ago.

      Lets hope the situation gets sorted out asap

      BBC reports it though no mention of of the L word.

      https://archive.is/7l5Rj

      I can’t wait to read all about it on the Guardian.

      Lets all juxtapose the treatment of this genuine bona fide scandal with the feeding frenzy of the Memo of Understanding.

      One thing is for sure- I canny imagine Torquil will be dashing off an article anytime soon.

    239. Effijy says:

      Chitterinlicht says:

      8 April, 2016 at 1:09 pm

      Full Metal Jacket

      I’d say: Fool Mental Hack At-It.

    240. heedtracker says:

      ‘Local Hero’

      The director is a ferocious NO too.

      http://www.bigissue.com/features/interviews/6282/bill-forsyth-scotland-is-a-little-nation-with-an-identity-problem

      “Scotland’s always been one of these little countries that’s had an identity problem,” Forsyth says. “It’s either had an inferiority complex or the opposite.

      It’s just a little schizophrenic nation like most little nations seeking an identity. There’s nothing awfully special about it. There’s history but every place on Earth has its history. Beyond that it’s a place where people live and get on with things, like any other.”

      Artists often have a handle on things long before the rest of us but the sheer malice dripping from this delightful chap is hard to read. He lives in Italy, Tuscany.

    241. Brian Doonthetoon says:

      Thanks Ruby!

      I’ve bookmarked that ‘savedeo.com’ site.
      I’ll give it a try the next time I have a problem downloading a video.

    242. Ian Brotherhood says:

      @Tam Jardine –

      Good point.

      Another legacy of the Blair/Brown project, eh? Ordinary punters paying – for decades to come – to see brick walls collapsing onto their own weans’ heids.

      God willing, we will live long enough to see both of those charlatans behind bars.

    243. Glamaig says:

      Bob Mack 8:21
      If you watch Scotland The Promised Land

      Am watching it now while its still available.

      The Zinoviev letter jumped out at me – establishment still using the same tactics today, with the Frenchgate memo!

    244. Proud Cybernat says:

      Okay – this does my head in (No offense, Rev. I appreciate it’s YOUR blog).

      I wrote out post with a number of points but it seems that because I placed some yutube links in the post, it gets filtered out and blocked.

      Normally I use tinyurls to link to yutube vids but I noticed that some people here ARE able to make native yutube links in their posts but others (including me) can’t. I don’t get it? And it’s frustrating as hell. Not seeking special privs or anything. Just wondering how some folks can post native yutube links and others can’t. Can anyone explain why this is? Am I doing something wrong with the yutube link?

      Ta.

    245. galamcennalath says:

      Proud Cybernat says:

      Stu’s instructions …

      “If you post YouTube links with the http:// part at the start, they’ll embed on the page rather than being posted as links. That can lead to this sort of thing. So don’t include the http:// bit or you’ll find your video in the spam bin.”

    246. Lollysmum says:

      Proud cybernat
      Put up your link then delete everything before www.

      Only applies to You tube links

    247. Brian Doonthetoon says:

      Also, I think if you include more than three links, sailing close to the wind you are.

    248. DerekCameron says:

      TQ disrespects his ” constituency ” . He thinks he’s clever. He’s not. What a despicable creature.

    249. Luigi says:

      heedtracker says:

      8 April, 2016 at 9:06 pm

      ‘Local Hero’

      The director is a ferocious NO too.

      http://www.bigissue.com/features/interviews/6282/bill-forsyth-scotland-is-a-little-nation-with-an-identity-problem

      Gregory’s Girl and Local Hero were two of the most disappointing, over-rated movies I have ever watched. Weak story lines with no real plots to speak of, these films epitomise the expression “going nowhere”. Truly cringeworthy stuff. It’s just as well the director was on the other side – he may have made a YES film that drove peopke away.

    250. Stoker says:

      And on the subject of Gammongate Wee Willie Stinky says
      “We like to organise our visits to send a message in pictorial terms”
      https://mobile.twitter.com/BBCPhilipSim/status/718400480548941825

      And the ideal soundtrack to accompany this ConDem Alliance vid is:
      Twist And Snout

    251. Lollysmum says:

      Rats not Tats

    252. heedtracker says:

      Luigi says:
      8 April, 2016 at 10:07 pm
      heedtracker says:

      8 April, 2016 at 9:06 pm

      ‘Local Hero’

      English nationalism makes a huge NO of sense in Scotland. Why would you want to lose to ownership and control of nearly half your home country? Jk Rowling’s a great example of English nationalism, all one million quids worth of English nationalism.

      But Scotch cringers like Forsyth are a whole universe of psychological freak out, in Tuscany. Torcuil up there will probably have as many massive reasons for detesting just the idea of Scotland becoming a nation state as artists like Forsyth JK Rowling. Actually she’s a billionaire artist with just the one giant reason , Scotland belongs to England. It’s probably been just like this for a long time too, as England lost control of many countries around the world.

    253. Giving Goose says:

      Bill Forhimself…I mean Forsyth is an arsehole. Born an arsehole and will die an arsehole.

      He was born with a severe case of self loathing.

      Long may he self loath.

      Who cares.

    254. Grouse Beater says:

      “Scotland is just a little schizophrenic nation like most little nations seeking an identity. There’s nothing awfully special about it. There’s history but every place on Earth has its history. Beyond that it’s a place where people live and get on with things, like any other.” Bill Foryth

      And that from the man whose entire fame rests on what his nation gave him culturally that enabled him to create comedy drama on film. (His US films bombed.)

      Can you imagine one of our great Scottish painters saying, “Scotland’s nothing to me, really. Gave me nothing. I could paint anywhere and it would still look the same.”

      Anybody seen ‘Gregory’s Girl 2’?

      Thought not.

    255. Proud Cybernat says:

      Okay–got it. Thnx folks. Happier bunny now. 🙂

    256. Ian Brotherhood says:

      This is for Heedtracker, and all other resident WOS Jakey fans:

      😉

      http://fortune.com/2016/04/07/jk-rowling-chair/

    257. Luigi says:

      Ever wonder why the yoons hate us so much? It’s all a matter of perception: We see the independence movement as an opportunity to start afresh, to build a new country, a new hope. They see it as trouble in Brigadoon.

    258. heedtracker says:

      Paul Mason warns political journalists: ‘You have no real idea what is going on’

      No shit Sherlock.

      http://archive.is/xkZbv

      They’re in Greece but

      “Mason said that, having been on the inside, he could see “there were times when we would sit among other journalists, and we would realise they had no idea what’s going on. They were really good, and it’s not their fault, but they had no idea what was going on.”

      But UKOK toryboy’s, with awful dress sense and giant egos, like Torcuil and Kevrage are gong to stop it all in their Scotland region.

      Fair enough rancid The Graun’s the nice torygraph, Scotland doesn’t exist, it cant, if it does, they lose control.

    259. Inverclyder says:

      Ian Brotherhood @ 10:38pm

      Saw that sold for crazy money yesterday.

      If I had the money I’d have bought that chair.

      Purely to get cheap copies made in Scotland to sell off to the Hairy Putter fans as they seem to buy any old shite.

      Profits going to Indyref2 and sites like this!

    260. Iain says:

      The bottom line, do we want to be ruled from abroad or do we want to be making our own decisions like most normal countries. It’s up to you.
      Vote Snp,Snp and remain.
      Scotland needs your vote.

    261. winifred mccartney says:

      Not just the rancid that has lost it so has the BBC disreporting scotland- first item Edinburgh schools to remain closed – not a mention of the L word and then the steel plants reopening and not a mention of the Scottish Govt. involvement not even film footage of FM at the opening. Blatantly. Biased. Corrupt.

    262. Proud Cybernat says:

      The day before IndyRef#1, BBC-PRAVDA gave us this wall-to-wall coverage, mornin’, noon and night:

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J39bBV7CBJk

      At the Scottish Elections in May, let us give BBC-PRAVDA a bit more of this:

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y1kkjPfZDZw

      And let BBC-PRAVDA, Scotland’s ‘unofficial opposition’, know that last May’s GE result wasn’t a flash-in-the-pan; that their bullshit propaganda no longer works on us; their tea’s oot.

      SNP x 2

    263. Paula Rose says:

      Is everyone behaving?

    264. K1 says:

      Proud Cybernat, are you just removing the http:// at the front of the link…keep everything after that including the www.

    265. Ian Brotherhood says:

      Just listened to Radio North Britain ‘News’, and the final item was surreal…the Archbishop of Canterbury has disclosed that did Dad wasn’t who he thought he was, but was Winston Churchill’s secretary?

      Huh?

      That can’t be right, on so many levels…

    266. Gary45% says:

      Regarding the situation of the schools in Edinburgh, I said years ago the PFI contracts would be a disaster. Lets hope the Nay Sayers remember who signed the contracts.
      Typical Labour ideas, a bit like building a ship without a rudder.
      Thank goodness the SNP are running the country, as I am sure they will hold the PFI companies to task.
      The missus noticed Nicola at the steel works on Reporting Shortbread, big surprise she wasn’t interviewed!?! “aye right”
      Rumour is Dave is visiting Gorgie Road Farm over the weekend.
      Wullie Rennie the shit, shit shoveler .
      SNPx2

    267. Saor Alba says:

      TC is obviously an IDIOT with an agenda.
      Good point made about not minding a UK deal with the same Chinese Company.
      What absolute bullshit from a loony yoony SLAB.
      No facts – all opinions with no actual foundation.
      TYPICAL!

    268. cearc says:

      ‘The chair’. Thought she wrote them sitting in a cafe ‘cos she was too poor to heat her flat?

      Seems she has several versions of her ‘poverty years’.

    269. keaton says:

      Torcuil’s spelling and grammar didn’t used to be so awful, did they? Has the Record had to fire all its subs?

    270. K1 says:

      Ach, wis late tae the party there Proud… 🙁

    271. Rock says:

      How the mighty have been disgraced.

      But when will they fall?

    272. Silver19 says:

      What are likes of Torcuil and rest of the unionist biased rotten to core press going to do once Scotland becomes independent again? Basically their game will be up. I hope their London controllers tell their Scottish branches to pack their bags as there time is up, I for one will never miss them and I reckon a lot of population in Scotland will not miss them either.

      I would welcome a more independent Scottish press less-biased more balanced with no political agenda’s and some proper journalism with descent articles and with a twist of some fun and interesting material too, I can but hope.

    273. Ian Brotherhood says:

      @cearc –

      Someone, someday, will write a magic-realist novel about how a fundamentally sad person constructed a fantastical alter-ego with the connivance of similarly frustrated meeja-whores as a ‘jape’ which got out hand and resulted in them all becoming fabulously wealthy…

      Yeah, it’s boringly Satanic, but, hey, that shit sells!

    274. heedtracker says:

      Ian Brotherhood says:
      8 April, 2016 at 10:38 pm
      This is for Heedtracker, and all other resident WOS Jakey fans:

      Its all in the UKOK language and word choice. England doesn’t own Scotland, England is Scotland’s friend, y’see. They just think that they should decide how Scotland should be run, because Holyrood is clearly hopeless and as Torcuil points out, cant even take on the Chinese, because we’re so stoopid. If only SLabour were back in charge, and JK Rowling would be the JK Rowling Queen of Scots.

      http://www.rorystewart.co.uk/joanna-lumley-lights-union-cairn/

      They even built a cairn of friendship. On the other hand, I watched Rory the Tory panicky freak outs on BBC tv, “we’ll lose Edinburgh and the Highlands,” so its up to the viewer to decide what friends means when it comes to Scottish democracy.

    275. K1 says:

      They could call that novel Spanner Pottymouth and The Journalists of Doom.

    276. Stoker says:

      Being a technotwat i’m in need of assistance. I’m trying to put together a large(ish) poster promoting the Wee Black Book but each attempt is failing due to the resolution not being high enough.

      Can this problem be overcome and if so how? The poster will be 3ft(tall) X 2ft(wide) and the front cover of Wee Blackie would take up the vast majority of the poster, all but 4 inches of white border across the top and across the bottom.

      I’ve been experimenting on Vistaprint but so far nae luck Chuck!

    277. cearc says:

      Ian B,

      Aha, the plot of your next novel revealed?

    278. Ian Brotherhood says:

      @Heedtracker –

      🙂 🙂 🙂

      The cairn of friendship…

      FFS.

      A’body loves/fancies ‘the lumley Joanna Lovely’, but why-oh-why did she feel the need to get Ranulph Fiennes onboard?

      He claimed to be the oldest man to have climbed Everest (allegedly) but couldn’t produce any photographic proof because ‘er, well, eh, it’s very high and cameras don’t work at that altitude.’

      Eh?

      Sod off, ya toe-less fud…

    279. call me dave says:

      @Ian Brotherhood

      Aye quite a story. “A kent yer faither”

      “No ye dinnae” ! 🙂

      https://archive.is/wKWX2

    280. yesindyref2 says:

      @stewartb
      Most excellent, great research. I have the Norges Bank in front of me, and I’ve checked out their fund page and some of the rest, just to make sure that’s in context.

      http://www.nbim.no/en/responsibility/exclusion-of-companies/

      There’s going to be some very red faces around in the media, and perhaps even some lawsuits. Well-deserved lawsuits as well. And if it affected the business of the CRG we’re talking millions, maybe billions, in loss of business.

    281. carjamtic says:

      Ian Brotherhood @ 10:38

      Cutty-Stools : wooden chair in which one had to sit in full view of the congregation if one was caught sinning.

      Creepie-Chair : stool of repentance.

      #yoonstool

    282. Legerwood says:

      Ian Brotherhood says:
      8 April, 2016 at 11:06 pm
      Just listened to Radio North Britain ‘News’, and the final item was surreal…the Archbishop of Canterbury has disclosed that did Dad wasn’t who he thought he was, but was Winston Churchill’s secretary?

      Huh?

      That can’t be right, on so many levels

      ———————————–

      Mr Welby’s biological father was Montagu Brown (male) Private Secretary to Sir Winston Churchill. He, Churchill, had other, female, secretaries who did the typing one of whom was Mr Welby’s mother.

    283. Ian Brotherhood says:

      @call me dave –

      🙂 🙂 🙂

      It’s unreal, eh?

      If you were being paid £1,000,000 a day, you still couldn’t come up with this shit…

      When are people going to crack and just say, okay, enough, enough…this ‘joke’ is over?

      FFS???

      When!?

    284. NeoconNat says:

      Stoker, for large format printing you’d typically use artwork that’s 150 dpi. You’d most likely need to produce the artwork in Photoshop or something similar. The problem you will have, I guess, is that you don’t have a high res picture of the front cover. If you are still stuck on Monday let me know and get my designer to put it together for you and post a link.

    285. Grouse Beater says:

      Car politics here, political essay tomorrow: http://wp.me/p4fd9j-69I

    286. NeoconNat says:

      Indyref2, lets get this clear; you think there’s going to be red faces and law suits because of some garbage article in a newspaper that everybody quietly accepts is gutter level trash?

      I don’t even think it makes sense to call the DR a newspaper.

      Lawsuits? Lol

    287. heedtracker says:

      He claimed to be the oldest man to have climbed Everest (allegedly) but couldn’t produce any photographic proof because ‘er, well, eh, it’s very high and cameras don’t work at that altitude.’

      His red and blue toryboy class destroyed Scottish heavy industry in say, 30 years, now all that’s left is twits like rory the tory, his cairn of friendship, English nat actresses, enraged gimps like Torcuil, with all the power and UKOK glory assorted BBC henchman like Ligger Neil can provide. Ligger Neil lives in Monaco.

      But we are adults, we stood and watched the red tories, led by Brown, as they destroyed everything that generations of Scots spent their lives working to build. Its all for our own good, our UKOK good.

    288. Stoker says:

      NeoconNat wrote:
      “If you are still stuck on Monday let me know and get my designer to put it together for you and post a link.”

      Thanks, i will be, so just go-ahead and set that up.
      Very much appreciated.

    289. yesindyref2 says:

      Looking at that Record page again it seems that Crichton isn’t half the man he used to be.

    290. Andrew Mclean says:

      Ian,
      The problem is most people think, actually the authors themselves also think that they are expressing the zeitgeist, when in fact they are just pawns in another mans game.
      As the executioners face is always well hidden, and the marionette can only express the emotions of his master, then these two are just toys for the amusement of children.

    291. yesindyref2 says:

      Ah NeoconNat, am I next on your list of those you’re trying to disrupt?

      I’m flattered!

    292. Iain More says:

      Ah Torcuil, the spiritual barsteward child of Brian Wilson and equally as poisonous if not more so. The longer he is denied mad Cockers job the more rabid he gets.

    293. Ian Brotherhood says:

      @Heedtracker –

      Funny that you mention Brown.

      He’s well-overdue an intervention.

      If it happens on Scottish soil there will be a congo-line of people, like yours-truly, waiting with red-hot pokers. (I do own a ‘poker’, but will be depending on someone providing a heat-source on the day…possible crowdfund there?)

      PS ‘enraged gimp’ is a keeper.

      PPS I don’t even know where Monaco is – does he flit back and forth on expenses? Shocking!

      🙂

    294. Iain More says:

      @Legerwood

      A good bit of work there!

    295. Andrew Mclean says:

      Yes Indy 2
      You did ask for it no point complaining now 🙂

      it’s funny watching him scratch you all one by one, like a child screaming, look at me, look at me, we are all genetically programmed to feel sorry for a crying child.

      He can be funny though, I do so hope he stays!

    296. Ruby says:

      Stoker says:
      8 April, 2016 at 11:33 pm

      Being a technotwat i’m in need of assistance. I’m trying to put together a large(ish) poster promoting the Wee Black Book but each attempt is failing due to the resolution not being high enough.

      Ruby replies

      You haven’t said what type of file you have.

      The Wee Black Book would have been created in InDesign. If you had the original InDesign file and you knew how to use InDesign you would be OK.

      Or perhaps you could ask Stu if you could provide you with a pdf which you could give to the printers.

      http://tinyurl.com/huzgnsp

    297. Ruby says:

      Stoker says:
      9 April, 2016 at 12:16 am

      NeoconNat wrote:
      “If you are still stuck on Monday let me know and get my designer to put it together for you and post a link.”

      Thanks, i will be, so just go-ahead and set that up.
      Very much appreciated.

      Ruby replies

      I’ll be checking in on Monday as I am very interested in what Neoconnat’s designer will produce for you.

    298. yesindyref2 says:

      Andrew
      Yes, everyone needs a pet and our cat can’t type.

      Well, not that I know of.

      Mmm, thinks …

    299. Ruby says:

      K1 says:
      9 April, 2016 at 1:01 am

      I mean…seriously:

      https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Cfg6z7uWIAEQsyS.jpg

      Ruby replies

      Do you think the UKIP voter has keeled over and fallen into the ditch amongst all the sticky willies?

      That is funny but not as funny as this

      http://tinyurl.com/zcrr3kz

    300. Stoker says:

      Thanks, Ruby, but ‘InDesign’ could be one of those new home makeover programmes for all i know. As i said, technotwat!

      K1 (1.01am), comical coming from stinking kippers.

    301. K1 says:

      Aye Ruby after they spelled Holyrood wrang and realised their mistake 😉

      Those pigs are stars, they should be given an Oscar fur upstagin’ Rennie.

    302. Ian Mackay says:

      It seems clear from Torquil’s article that he is indeed suffering mental anguish over the rise of the SNP and Scotland’s pro-independence direction of travel.

      He has my pity. The article reads like a man at breaking point.

      He may not be a danger to himself or others (yet) – but he is certainly a danger to the Daily Record’s circulation figures.

    303. Sandy says:

      Torquil: A member of the old Joyce school? Lord Ha HA.
      Various phrases used to describe him.
      My preference – “more to be pitied than pissed upon”.

    304. Ruby says:

      K1 says:
      9 April, 2016 at 1:37 am

      Aye Ruby after they spelled Holyrood wrang and realised their mistake ?

      Those pigs are stars, they should be given an Oscar fur upstagin’ Rennie.

      Ruby replies

      I didn’t notice the spelling error! LOL

      There are always a good few laughs during these election campaigns.

      I still get a laugh when I watch this:

      http://tinyurl.com/z76yvo6

    305. Ruby says:

      Stoker says:
      9 April, 2016 at 1:27 am

      Thanks, Ruby, but ‘InDesign’ could be one of those new home makeover programmes for all i know. As i said, technotwat!

      K1 (1.01am), comical coming from stinking kippers.

      Ruby replies

      You should definitely ask Stu if he can provide you with a pdf file suitable to present to the printers.

      If I remember correctly I think it was Lindsay who did the Wee Black Book in InDesign. He might be the one to talk to and explain what you want.

      There might be a few people who want to have a poster printed.

      Now you know all about ‘InDesign’ so you’re not such a technotwat!

    306. Paul says:

      What a fruit loop Torquil is, I cringed all the way through that but your summing up made me laugh out loud.
      Rev you are a genius ?

    307. ArtyHetty says:

      Regards schools being closed in Edinburgh, we must all make sure the yoons are not allowed to blame the SNP gov for this shambles.

      I had someone who is a yoon tell me that the new hospital in Ayr is being built using PFI.
      No, it is being built using the Scottish government’s NPD, (non profit distribusting programme)
      just for the record in case anyone claims that the SNP have anything to do with Slabs PFI scheme, vanity projects galore were Slab.

    308. ArthHetty says:

      Ffs, meant non profit distributing!
      It’s way past my bedtime.

    309. ArtyHetty says:

      Meant Non profit distributing, the ‘s’ got in there somehow.

    310. Vambomarbeleye says:

      There is only ever one reason for wearing brown shoes. It’s so people don’t know your standing in keech.

    311. Jonathan Marshall says:

      I wonder which department or organization gives the the Scottish government and the other devolved adminisrations advice when it comes to dealing with foreign companies or indeed other countries. It seems as part of ‘better together’ we are paying too much for the Foreign Office and the embassies around the world if we can have simple info such as whether a company has been involved in some scandal. Maybe you could look into it Stu?

    312. annie says:

      The Tories are up to their necks in tax sleaze, Labour and LibDems are responsible for the PFI schools disaster in Edinburgh and it’s the SNP getting pelters in the papers and BBC for encouraging inward investment. Go figure.

    313. Legerwood says:

      Iain More says:
      9 April, 2016 at 12:36 am
      @Legerwood

      A good bit of work there!
      _————————–
      Not sure which of my posts you are referring to but in the long post the bulk of it was a re-posting of a post on an earlier thread by Stewart.

      The credit is all his for putting together the info on Sinofortone.

    314. Sandra Hunter says:

      Coincidentally, I was reading about another memorandum of understanding the other day, only from Westminster, in the book ‘Secret Affairs – Britain’s Collusion With Radical Islam’ by Mark Curtis – the updated 2012 edition. From page 370:
      “Great Britain ‘enjoy a special defence relationship’ underpinned by a Defence Cooperation Arrangement signed in 2006, involving British military training of the Qatari armed forces in Qatar and Britain. It also noted that Qatar has a diverse range of investments in Britain and is a major supplier of energy, providing 11 per cent of Britain’s gas demand. As regards Kuwait, David Cameron announced in February 2011 the creation of a UK-Kuwait Trade and Investment Task Force, a commitment to double trade to $4 billion a year by 2015, and the signature of a memorandum of understanding on trade and technical cooperation. The Kuwait Investment Authority has its overseas headquarters in London and has invested some £150 billion over the last fifty years, the majority of it in Britain. The Gulf states including Saudi Arabia now account for half of all British arms sales and the government estimates that they will spend around $100 billion on ‘defence and security’ technology over the next five years.”

      “Along with these contacts have come extreme British apologias for the Gulf regimes’ political orientations. Governments which Britain opposes are simply told by Ministers to adopt democracy. When it comes to allied regimes, however, notably those in the Gulf, a large amount of latitude is allowed. A standard formula, as outlined by David Cameron in a speech to the Kuwait National Assembly in February 2011, runs as follows:

      It is not for me, or for governments outside the region, to pontificate about how each country meets the aspirations of its people. It is not for us to tell you how to do it, or precisely what shape your future should take. There is no single formula for success, and there are many ways to ensure greater, popular participation in Government. We respect your right to make your own decisions, while offering our goodwill and support.”

      End of extract. Any typos are mine.

    315. gus1940 says:

      Over the years there has been much speculation as to how the allegedly thick Mark Thatcher ‘earned’ his multi-million pounds fortune but nobody has yet come into the open and definitively pointed the finger in the direction of the truth although most people have a fair idea of the source.

      It would be interesting to know how Anthony Charles Linton Blair arranges his ill-gotten multi-millions as regards tax.

      Apart from Cameron and some speculation re Osborne not a single name of any serving member of The Commons or The Other Place or for that matter the Big City Fat Cats has been forthcoming to date – how curious.

      All we have been fed so far is foreign politicians, some celebrities and 2 businessmen few have heard of who featured on Panorama. – Roll on next week’s Private Eye – assuming that Ian Hyslop is not a multi- millionaire.

    316. iain taylor says:

      He’s writing for his readership. The 200k who buy the Wrecker (less all the free ones given away, of course) and lap up his anti Scottish hysteria.

    317. yesindyref2 says:

      Found this folks, via a pretty decent poster on the Herald who does at least do some research:

      http://english.klp.no/polopoly_fs/1.31194.1434009387!/menu/standard/file/China%20Railway%20Group%20decision%20to%20exclude%20ENG.pdf

      “The Council on Ethics’ recommendation relies on press sources, since the primary documents themselves have not been made public.”

      So the Council of Ethics based its recommnedation on press sources, newspaper reports.

      Well, we all know how accurate they are at times.

    318. DerekM says:

      Great work Rev yes what on earth is that idiot thinking about ,its the demented rant of someone totally out of touch with reality.

      Mind boggling puril gibberish comes to my train of thought after reading that.

      Those demented yoon journalists you know we might have to build an asylum for them when we do get indy they will go stark raving bonkers lol

    319. Phil Robertson says:

      As another day passes this posting gets further and further from the truth.

      “There’s not a shred of evidence that SinoFortone, the Chinese company involved, is “shady””. Actually this may well be true but the other company involved has been blacklisted by the Norwegian sovereign wealth fund because of endemic corruption.

      “UK civil servant Sir Richard Heygate, who advised on the talks, says they’re “squeaky clean”.” That will be the same Richard Heygate who is paid as an advisor by one of the Chinese companies.

      “And we’re not sure why Brian Souter’s opinion is relevant to anything,” How naive: the two specific projects being considered are for affordable housing and a major railway scheme. Do you know what business Brian Soutar is in?

      “The details of the memorandum were promptly released ” The deal was signed on 21st March and the SG came clean on 4th April. At that rate of promptness we’ll get the election results sometime in June!

      And the clincher “we’re not even sure why Scottish people should care if the company had paid a few bribes in its lifetime anyway. Bribery is how things generally get done in China.” True tartan Tory values. If we’re benefitting financially, we can look the other way.

    320. Gary45% says:

      annie@9.59,
      The EBC and the Yoons cannot and never will accept that Scotland can manage its own affairs.
      We are supposed to live cap in hand to the imperial masters, that is why it will always be SNP bad.
      Their time is running out
      Tick Tock.

    321. yesindyref2 says:

      @Phil Robertson: “but the other company involved has been blacklisted by the Norwegian sovereign wealth fund because of endemic corruption.

      No it hasn’t, read the thread and follow the link given by one of the posters. It’s not on the exclusion list on the Norges Bank website, therefore it’s not “blacklisted”.

    322. Vambomarbeleye says:

      Just had the local lib dems pushing crap through my letter box. This despite the fact that I have a great fuck off SNP poster in my window. Thick bastards. That’s not a reflection on the Arch Bish.

    323. Andrew Mclean says:

      Great Britain is not involved in bribery,

      Ha, ha, Ho, Ho!

      The city of London, overseas tax havens, secret for a reason, Rolls Royce, ICI, BA, BAE, and the list goes on.

      And before anyone says, the Chinese government fined GSK $490 million for bringing government officials,

      The fact of this story is still strong, the only reason this report ever got published is because SNP bad, the Chinese government are building the next nuclear power station, new tube lines in London,
      But oh my god, cheap press, scream at the sky, our government is wanting a pice of the action, and the wee unionists piss their pants!

      http://www.theage.com.au/interactive/2016/the-bribe-factory/day-1/the-company-that-bribed-the-world.html

    324. Grouse Beater says:

      Phil Robertson: How naive: the two specific projects being considered are for affordable housing and a major railway scheme. Do you know what business Brian Soutar is in?

      Until Souter has actually gotten involved in some Chinese invested railway deal its damn near libellous to suggest you know what he’s planning.

      Almost anything associated with transportation, from planes to bloody roller skates is linked to Souter by the opponents of self-determination. It’s really boring.

    325. John Edgar says:

      Is the Record becoming insignificant? It can’t help Slab, it is running out of puff. Like Cochrane, “zany comedy relief”, he bellows and rants snp baad, yet no effect other than being the jester in house at the Telegraph.

    326. ScotsCanuck says:

      …. he truly is crazier than a shit house rat !!!

    327. winifred mccartney says:

      Can someone please tell me the point of the Sunday Herald.

    328. Fred says:

      Anent Crichton & dodgy deals, has he enquired into the financing of Brian Wilson’s Harris Tweed interests & cash from the Balkans?

    329. Stoker says:

      Ruby wrote (9 April, 2016 at 2:20 am)
      “You should definitely ask Stu if he can provide you with a pdf file suitable to present to the printers.”

      I’ve tried contacting him several times without reply. Maybe you could give it a go? As you said, more may want to create posters.
      I’ll also take a look at what ‘NcN’ produces tomorrow.



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