Tonight somebody’s sent us a copy of the SNP’s official Social Media Policy, which is exactly the sort of awful corporate wonk-drivel you’d probably expect it to be.
Our favourite part was this masterpiece of unrememberable gibberish in the vein of the Scottish Government’s hopeless “FACTS” slogan (honestly, without going and looking can you remember what ANY of the letters represent?) for the coronavirus :
And here’s a tweet from earlier today from a prospective SNP candidate:
We’re not sure which of the letters that conforms to.
Alert readers will have noticed by now that while we were at the dentist getting rid of all our excess money, the Fabiani inquiry has published Alex Salmond’s written evidence submission, ahead of his in-person appearance currently scheduled for next week.
We’re feeling a bit confused this morning, readers. Maybe someone can help.
Below is the key part of the letter sent by the Clerks of the Scottish Parliament, acting on behalf of the Fabiani committee, to the Crown Office and Procurator Fiscal Service (COPFS) a week and a half ago, requesting material for their investigation into the Scottish Government’s botched handling of false allegations against Alex Salmond.
As we’d told you at the time, the request was a sham, designed to produce nothing of any value, because it carefully excluded the only person whose communications with Sue Ruddick were actually of relevance – SNP chief executive Peter Murrell.
(Murrell being an employee of the party, NOT a member of the Scottish Government, a civil servant or a special adviser.)
Readers, we swear to you we are not making this up. What you’re about to read are genuine extracts from the SNP’s official new (probably illegal) Equalities Mechanism explanatory note, detailing what does and doesn’t count as a disability when it comes to jumping the queue for a regional list nomination.
And straight away it’s a real punch in the gut for firestarters, muggers, rapists, flashers and, in most cases, hay-fever sufferers. THIS BIGOTRY WILL NOT STAND.
Having never been part of a political party, an area where Wings lacks expertise is in understanding the nuts and bolts of their operation, and how a party’s rules can be used to usurp their members’ power. We’re delighted to have someone equipped to provide a valuable insight into how that’s happened to the SNP in the last two years.
The following line is still a definitive statement in the SNP constitution:
“National Conference is the supreme governing and policy-making body of the Party.”
But in practice it is no longer the case. The 2018 redraft of the constitution centralised power in the Leader and in the NEC. The party Leader has sole and total power over policy – both in the manifesto and in government – and the NEC has sole power over who represents the party and what they are allowed to say.
So in effect, since 2018 the party elite – not the membership – has ruled the SNP.
Something most people don’t know about the infamous Spanish Inquisition is that it was never the Catholic Church that actually executed heretics. Particularly if a prisoner had refused to confess their vile heresy even under torture, the Church instead handed them over to the “mercy” of the state to deliver their end.
So SNP MP Kirsty Blackman (or as we understand some are already calling her, “the Tiny Torquemada“) would have fitted right in with it.
Or more likely, they just wanted to try to bury all of their skeletons at once in a single giant avalanche of crookedness. But either way, enough is enough. Criminals accused of perjury don’t get to decide if they’ll answer for their lies or not.
The Fabiani committee has the power to compel witnesses to attend. They must now use that power without further delay, or they must call on the police to arrest the SNP’s chief executive immediately and drag him into an interview room by his ears if need be with a solicitor in attendance. (Doubtless also paid for by SNP members.)
Scotland is not GoodFellas. Nobody is above the law. Stop this damn rot now.
The reaction to it was absolutely explosive. Half of the Parliamentary SNP spent the whole night running around social media frantically firefighting their own members, who were absolutely furious about what they’d just discovered. Poisonous abuse from the party’s woke faction poured out like never before. We got called every kind of bigot under the sun by SNP officeholders.
(The article, of course, made no mention of any sort of bisexual people, Jewish people, trans people or women as a group, let alone actually being prejudiced against anyone. Ironically just about the only kind of prejudice that wasn’t alleged was ageism, possibly because it might have looked a smidge too ironic coming from a bunch of bedwetting children whose core ideological stance is that anyone over 29 is a Nazi.)
But there was one thing you DIDN’T read amid the torrents of hate.
You didn’t read anyone saying a single word of the post was untrue.
We don’t yet know what happened regarding the supposed definition of transphobia – our source thinks that it may have been postponed due to not being able to get the required 2/3 vote for an emergency agenda item.
But we know that something even madder DID happen.
Hatey McHateface on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “It’s the coming of the men in white coats you need to be worrying about. Anybody make it to the…” Mar 9, 18:20
Sven on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “President Trump is reported to have offered the Iranian Women’s Team political asylum in the US, Mark, so things may…” Mar 9, 18:16
Hatey McHateface on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “Twinned with “Scots For Dummies”, Alf. Who knew that the Scots for zombie is zombie, the Scots for tree is…” Mar 9, 18:11
Hatey McHateface on Scotland’s Most Frightened: ““Scotland will have expressed it’s will” Ah. I see the problem right there, Geri. I guess that no matter how…” Mar 9, 18:03
Confused on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “My favourite austrian painters are egon schiele and gustav klimt, but this guy has potential www.youtube.com/watch?v=NmjrfXO0mdk art can be a…” Mar 9, 17:56
Mark Beggan on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “New Iranian leader is now declared a ‘living martyr’. How’s that for word play! Or in other words a dead…” Mar 9, 17:56
Alf Baird on Scotland’s Most Frightened: ““In every general election since 2015 (bar the last one) there has been a majority of (supposedly) pro-independence MP’s returned…” Mar 9, 17:09
Aidan on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “So we are back where we started then aren’t we. Can you provide any legal authority to back up this…” Mar 9, 16:45
Geri on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “Cause Alex asked the electorate two separate questions. #SNP1 – to govern. #SNP2 – to remain as FM. New SNP…” Mar 9, 16:32
Geri on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “Areswipe Learn to read.. What I said “Only Westminster is the recognised seat of power. They need to concentrate on…” Mar 9, 16:26
agentx on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “Alf Baird says: “This also explains why our oppressor is keen to ensure the SNP never quite wins a majority…” Mar 9, 16:20
Geri on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “They’re probably trying to audition as some of those $7k a post influencers to promote BS & failing miserably.” Mar 9, 16:02
Aidan on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “Oh right, so it started off as “this proves my point” and we are now on “this has nothing to…” Mar 9, 16:01
Geri on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “Isn’t it ironic. After decades of propaganda that we need protecting from the radicalised, religious, fanatical terrorists who aren’t afraid…” Mar 9, 15:58
Geri on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “Areswipe The Supreme court ruling related to Holyrood. & ONLY Holyrood.” Mar 9, 15:26
Alf Baird on Scotland’s Most Frightened: ““Colonialism…‘for dummies’” Weel pit, Northcode. Whit minds me, A wis gaun tae caw ‘Doun-Hauden’ bi anither name – ‘Zombie Naition’…” Mar 9, 15:16
James on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “Those two Yoon stooges seem to be squeezing them out relentlessly. Divert, distract, rinse repeat.” Mar 9, 14:14
Aidan on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “You clearly haven’t read the case or understood it if you have. It is explicitly stated in the judgement that…” Mar 9, 13:58
Geri on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “No need to resort to type with yer banal childish insults. Just admit you are wrong & be on yer…” Mar 9, 13:45
Geri on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “Areswipe Are you suggesting the ballot box isn’t legal? They state otherwise. **Such a referendum would represent a democratic expression…” Mar 9, 13:37
Hatey McHateface on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “What an insult, sarah. Show Northy some respect when you speak to him. Post in Scots.” Mar 9, 13:22
Hatey McHateface on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “Sorry, Aidan, I disagree. I get a much more satisfying mind’s eye picture from the former!” Mar 9, 13:12
sarah on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “Northcode: you’re always worth reading! Enjoy your day – Nil desperandum carborundum.” Mar 9, 13:07
Hatey McHateface on Scotland’s Most Frightened: ““can we please go back to the new forum?” Seconded. Off you trot, Geri. Perhaps a funny thing will happen…” Mar 9, 13:04
Hatey McHateface on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “An absolute torrent of BTL comments today. And not a single one about the wee jenny side. Could it be…” Mar 9, 13:00
Aidan on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “Where you hear “word on the street” read “ranting from the asylum” – that’ll help to contextualise why this is…” Mar 9, 12:50
Aidan on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “Nothing in that judgement summary in any way aligns to what you wrote earlier does it though Geri. In fact…” Mar 9, 12:49
Aidan on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “As one of Wing’s most prolific posters I’m sure he doesn’t need permission from me to endlessly post boring repetitive…” Mar 9, 12:48
Hatey McHateface on Scotland’s Most Frightened: ““A start has to be made in May” You tell them. Nobody can start today. Diaries will already be full.…” Mar 9, 12:40
Sven on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “Hi James, Hope you’re settled in now and life has become a tad easier for you.” Mar 9, 12:28