This is a wretchedly boring time to be writing about politics for a living, readers. Parliamentarians in Edinburgh and London haven’t technically checked out for the summer yet – Holyrood still has a month to go before taking two months off, while Westminster is currently having a couple of weeks off for “Whitsun”, whatever the hell that is, before coming back for a month and a half then sodding off until September.
But really they’re already at the “bringing board games in” stage of term, and both the elected chambers and the media already have their eyes on the beach, which probably explains why we’re being punted drivel like this.
Even if we must afford the graphics team some grudging kudos for the unicoo.
Wait, has Nicola Sturgeon died? We didn’t see anything on the news.
Because there are only a limited number of possible reasonable explanations for why police wanting to find out what Nicola Sturgeon knew about something would ask people who aren’t Nicola Sturgeon.
When I was a boy at Balbardie Primary School in Bathgate in the mid-70s, football was banned in the playground. Of course we were all fitba-daft laddies, so we sought ways around the prohibition. Occasionally someone would bring in a tennis ball, but those were difficult to control in school shoes and also apt to fly over the wall of the outdoor toilet block if somebody caught one sweetly on the volley.
So most playtimes somebody would produce a tin of Pepsi or Irn-Bru or Cresta, chug the contents, stand the empty container on its end and stomp sharply on it, producing something more akin to an ice-hockey puck that would serve for our kickabout.
But even after being skelped and scudded around a concrete playground into stone walls for 20 minutes, that can was still in better shape at the end of our game than the one the SNP have been kicking down the road since 2016.
The SNP now seem to be involved in some sort of competition where they dare each other to come up with the most blatant insult to their own members and/or the wider independence movement and see just how much they can get people to put up with.
First up was this drivel:
Humza Yousaf is leader of the SNP, a political party whose defining purpose – arguably its SOLE real purpose – is the pursuit of Scottish independence, but his “vision for Scotland” didn’t include a single mention of it.
Instead, Yousaf intends to spend the next three years on “equality”, “opportunity” and “community”, three meaningless buzzwords which every political party on Earth would claim to be in favour of. He might as well have identified his key values as kittens, lollipops and hugs.
Once again, we’re dismayed to report that we called it right. Because last night SNP MSP Mairi McAllan, officially representing the party on Question Time, told a weary audience in Fort William that that was precisely the case.
And readers, if ever a policy has been tested in battle and found wanting, it’s that one.
Just over a year ago, Shona Robison – then the Cabinet Secretary For Social Justice, now the Deputy First Minister – told the Scottish Parliament this:
There now follow some quotes from the media regarding the case of Andrew Miller, aka Amy George, who yesterday admitted the kidnap and repeated sexual abuse of an 11-year-old girl at his home in Galashiels earlier this year.
Vivian O’Blivion on List Voting For Cretins: “A front page article in The Guardian this morning reads like Swiftian satire. An exercise in projection, and inversion. “Populists…” Jan 2, 11:54
Alf Baird on The Gulf War: ““In the final analysis, the only ones to blame for that are Scottish independence supporters themselves.” That’s not even a…” Jan 2, 11:50
100%Yes on List Voting For Cretins: “Of course they know, that’s the point. The SNP DOES NOT WANT INDEPENDENCE and it certainly doesn’t want a majority…” Jan 2, 11:20
100%Yes on List Voting For Cretins: “The SNP stopped working for Scotland the day Salmond stood down. John Swinney is holding a full deck of cards…” Jan 2, 11:15
Ian on List Voting For Cretins: “Scottish elections – 1st vote first past the post, 2nd vote D’Hondt. UK elections – FPTP Scottish council elections -…” Jan 2, 11:08
100%Yes on List Voting For Cretins: “So stand up John Swinney your a moron. So we have 815,420 votes wasted on a party who just isn’t…” Jan 2, 10:54
Skip_NC on List Voting For Cretins: “Well, when you have Scotland’s foremost pishologist saying that SNP and Greens are on course for a “pro-independence” majority and…” Jan 2, 10:42
Effijy on List Voting For Cretins: “Could some crackpot at SNP try to offer what on earth is going through their minds that they cannot comprehend…” Jan 2, 09:58
Alex on List Voting For Cretins: “Ummm because the snp do not actually want independence and their rabbid supporters just want them to get more votes…” Jan 2, 09:56
Xaracen on The Gulf War: “sam said; “This occurs when AI systems generate plausible but entirely fictitious legal cases or statutes. Such errors can mislead…” Jan 2, 09:50
Mach1 on List Voting For Cretins: “Despite your sterling efforts to communicate the bleedin obvious it seems to be futile in many cases, comments online continue…” Jan 2, 09:49
David on List Voting For Cretins: “How can we get this message across? The SNP keep saying vote SNP 1 & 2. Why has this strategy…” Jan 2, 09:37
Andy Ellis on The Gulf War: “It pays to be suspicious of folk who cast doubt on polls carried out by reputable polling companies using accepted…” Jan 2, 09:16
Andy Ellis on The Gulf War: “We need to nail this ongoing bullshit argument that the reason “minor” pro indy parties are failing to make progress…” Jan 2, 08:40
Alan C on The Gulf War: “‘Sovereignty party leader Brian Nugent announced this morning he would be standing for both the Shetland constituency and the Highlands…” Jan 2, 07:19
James Cheyne on The Gulf War: “The people whom died in WW11 fought for our freedoms, our rights in a free Country a Britain that was…” Jan 2, 06:43
James Cheyne on The Gulf War: “The error Alba made and still make is trying to emulate the Snp old party that had long gone. That…” Jan 2, 06:07
Young Lochinvar on The Gulf War: “Correct. Can the talking heads here who brook no disagreement please advise; who should we actually vote for? ISP and…” Jan 2, 03:50
Phil on The Gulf War: “The fatal flaw of this excellent site is the dogged insistence on taking these independence polls seriously. Thus a ‘six…” Jan 2, 03:07
Cynicus on The Gulf War: “Lorna Campbell says: 1 January, 2026 at 2:41 pm “Somebody biased almost certainly had a hand in the decision. Don’t…” Jan 2, 01:13
Ian Brotherhood on Off-topic: “This will perceived as perverse by some but we had steak pie on Christmas Day, with the option of gravy-soaked…” Jan 1, 22:11
DaveL on The Gulf War: “@Hatey. Off topic. As I mentioned here: https://wingsoverscotland.com/a-matter-of-class/#comment-3150406 They’re doing it again and as you’re a fanboy I thought I’d…” Jan 1, 21:49
Towbar Sullivan on The Gulf War: “Now and again I read the Guardian for a laugh. There’s an article in it “Labour needs complete ‘reset’ to…” Jan 1, 21:33
DaveL on The Gulf War: “Stop yer whining.” Jan 1, 19:42
diabloandco on The Gulf War: “Seconded!” Jan 1, 19:30
twathater on The Fear Of The Briar: “Alf reform have been back pedaling on their policies e.g. their opposition to the gender woo woo , the immigration…” Jan 1, 18:18
twathater on The Gulf War: “@ James Cheyne as our infested deluded yoonionists keep telling US the ONLY one who has the authority or right…” Jan 1, 18:05
James Cheyne on The Gulf War: “Are you upset… didums. Trying to control the narrative, as far as I am aware it still relates to Scots…” Jan 1, 16:46
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on The Gulf War: “KID-ON SCOTLAND Cardboard box with two holes cut for eyes. Wee boy in there pretending he wants out. In reality…” Jan 1, 16:41
Alf Baird on The Gulf War: “The Rev has rightly again pointed out the ever widening gulf between votes for SNP and votes for independence. By…” Jan 1, 16:27
