Since we’re talking about sectarianism and bigotry this week, we’ve got you a 1998 Scotsman piece on the subject. The full piece is below, but our favourite lines come from Scotland In Union stalwart and noted Twitter zoomer “Professor” Tom Gallagher.
Wow. And the Ku Klux Klan’s distinctiveness stems from their white identity, we guess, although perhaps they have misgivings about some aspects of lynching black people and setting fire to crosses on their lawns.
We’re a bit annoyed about this, because we were going to give the Absolute Fanny Of The Week award to Anas Sarwar every week as a joke, but now it seems we can’t.
So that’s a professional journalist who’s studied the Offensive Behaviour (Football) Act, or OBFA, so intently and diligently that he keeps calling it “OBAF” instead. But that’s not the stupidest of it.
The very strange man who is David Leask, chief reporter at the Herald, has been hard at work with a shovel ever since we ran a couple of stories on Monday.
Leask’s argument, at least in so far as we can make any sense of it at all, is that even deliberately and knowingly made-up lies printed in mainstream newspapers are not, and can never be, “fake news”.
That’s a term which he insists only applies to spoof sites pretending to be real news outlets, which we’d presume – although it’s by no means clear – means the likes of The Onion or the Daily Mash.
This is an interesting one. Almost 40 years on from the event, Scottish politics is still plagued by micro-brained Labour types insisting that the SNP “ushered in” Margaret Thatcher after the devolution referendum of 1979 was sabotaged by a Labour MP.
SNP supporters counter that this is complete bollocks, largely because it’s complete bollocks. James Callaghan, the Labour PM at the time, blamed 34 of his own MPs for bringing his government down, by supporting an amendment from Islington South and Finsbury Labour MP George Cunningham which blocked the creation of a Scottish Assembly even though it won the referendum by a narrow margin.
(Cunningham resigned from Labour two years later and subsequently joined the SDP, but in 2012 the Daily Express dragged him out to demand that the same “40% rule” be applied to the indyref.)
History, though, has forgotten someone else who was apparently the true architect of the fix, to the extent that we’d never heard about it until now.
We thought it might be worth going through this in a bit more detail.
The phrase “out of control” is in quote marks in the Herald’s front-page headline, leading readers to believe someone has said it, but who? Let’s investigate.
We’ve got a shock result for the inaugural winner of this exciting new award, readers. Remarkably it’s NOT David Torrance – who wrote an arch review of a chapter of a book about Donald Trump that didn’t actually exist. Good effort, Davey, but no cigar.
No, the first ever Wings Absolute Fanny Of The Week is… Anas Sarwar!
In common with half of Scottish Labour, Sarwar has been raging at Paisley MP Mhairi Black for her “silence” over the closure of a 16-bed children’s ward in the town, which has been replaced by an entire new state-of-the-art 256-bed children’s hospital 10 minutes down the road, right next to the sparkly new Southern General.
But only Sarwar did it by enclosing a picture of the local paper’s front-page splash on the story. In which there was one teeny-weeny slight problem for him.
Remarkably, the notoriously unreliable and yet somehow omnipresent Scottish political commentator and reality-disputer David “Davey” Torrance was still digging last night in the wake of this story from three days ago.
Previous episodes in the series are here. If you’ve got a story like this to tell, or you know anyone who does, Phantom Power want to hear from you – drop them a line.
Late last night in the House Of Commons saw one of the most significant votes in the history of UK constitutional politics. A group of Scottish Tory MPs voted to oppose an amendment which would have protected the central building block of Scottish (and Welsh) devolution – the principle that any powers not explicitly reserved are devolved – from the UK government’s attempted huge power grab under the cover of Brexit.
Last night they could have fixed it by supporting the amendment (backed by every other Scottish MP right across party lines), which would have tipped the arithmetic and ensured its success. Instead they betrayed every voter in Scotland – including their own – by waving the bill through unamended and passing the buck to the unelected House Of Lords, which has no representatives from Scotland’s most popular party.
This morning, BBC Scotland led on the fact that it snowed a bit in Scotland in January.
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Aidan on Do You Believe In The Westwood?: “Of course there is no truth in anything you’ve said there, it is lies and nonsense in its totality which…” Apr 13, 11:19
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Geri on Do You Believe In The Westwood?: “Again with the propaganda. There is a European war crim on their list. They’ve also been warned by the ICJ.…” Apr 13, 10:58
Geri on Do You Believe In The Westwood?: “Arsey, You really should learn how to use Google. There are different kinds of oil & different kinds of refineries,…” Apr 13, 10:29
Alf Baird on Do You Believe In The Westwood?: “Yes, clear to see that Swinney is a fan of the Green leadership, with both the latter helping him up…” Apr 13, 10:06
Northcode on Do You Believe In The Westwood?: “No. I do not believe in the Westwood. The Westwood is as real as the Treaty of Union; as real…” Apr 13, 09:24
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Aidan on Do You Believe In The Westwood?: “As usual it is a 180 degree inversion from you. Those you describe as “poot and towel heads” are not…” Apr 13, 06:32
Aidan on Do You Believe In The Westwood?: “The USA is not rich in fossil fuels says Geri. This is the same USA that is the number one…” Apr 13, 06:24
Geri on Do You Believe In The Westwood?: “I love that song LOL “You said you loved losers – well look at your team” .. bloody brilliant! “Your…” Apr 13, 00:39
Geri on Do You Believe In The Westwood?: “I’ve been listening to Baud for years. He’s excellent. That happened to him a few months ago. It’s terrible what…” Apr 13, 00:20
Geri on Do You Believe In The Westwood?: “Look at you, all big & all clever celebrating war crims, Jenny & bent, unelected midget president just lifting ppl…” Apr 12, 23:57
Confused on Do You Believe In The Westwood?: ““where is the lie”? www.youtube.com/watch?v=5G9DNx7xIIc but seriously https://archive.ph/QQgz6 telling the truth in wartime can get you in trouble – jacques…” Apr 12, 23:45
Confused on Do You Believe In The Westwood?: “Orban buys it; the only decent man in the EU. the 90B to yookie was a loan, but its the…” Apr 12, 23:41
Confused on Do You Believe In The Westwood?: “not you, Scotland https://archive.ph/k6AUO “we” is doing a lot of faking going on, it means … me, josh, piers, the…” Apr 12, 23:39
Hatey McHateface on Do You Believe In The Westwood?: “Thanks, CC. It’s a fraught time for anybody trying to run a small business so I have been busy. I…” Apr 12, 23:12
Frank Gillougley on Do You Believe In The Westwood?: “I remember now, the apparatchick’s name was a Valerie. Two legs bad, four legs good kinda person. Back on topic…” Apr 12, 22:53
Mark Beggan on Do You Believe In The Westwood?: “The Uruk-Hia are having serious staffing problems. There’s rumours they’re in discussions with G4S.” Apr 12, 22:43
Hatey McHateface on Do You Believe In The Westwood?: “I’m no fan of the EU but fair play to them. poot is down one apologist tonight and that’s a…” Apr 12, 22:26
Hatey McHateface on Do You Believe In The Westwood?: “90 billion Euros for our fighting friends in the east have just been unlocked as Orban is consigned to history’s…” Apr 12, 22:11
Geri on Do You Believe In The Westwood?: “The EU was always going to get rid of him, by hook or by crook. He just wasn’t playing ball…” Apr 12, 22:00
Frank Gillougley on Do You Believe In The Westwood?: “Meanwhile, back at the ranch, here in sunny Hungary, Orbán concedes and Tisza will pass the 2/3rds majority needed to…” Apr 12, 21:42