When you’ve been watching Scotland playing football for 50 years of your life, you become accustomed to disappointment. You expect disappointment. Anything better than disappointment becomes a bonus.
Having solved cat hunger in Greece, the tireless Holiday Boy has now turned his hand to addressing Scotland’s crippling golfing shortage, so we’ve got a different sort of cartoon again for you this weekend.
The clip below is from a 1981 arcade videogame called Venture, by Exidy, in which you play a cheerful character called Winky on a mission to loot treasure from a series of monster-infested dungeons.
For the purposes of this article the treasure in the room above, which takes the form of a castle tower, represents Scottish politics. The room itself is the Union.
The SNP released their general election manifesto today. We’re not going to link you to it, because we don’t want to be responsible for wasting your time. This is everything it has to say on the party’s (cough) strategy for achieving independence.
It deserves much, much less respect than we’re giving it. Tomorrow, ice lolly reviews.
I’m a professional community organiser, and a tenant and housing activist for some 20 years. I saw the old Scottish Tenants Organisation get smashed by Jack McConnell’s government to make way for council housing privatisation, which in Glasgow created the Glasgow Housing Association.
I’ve long wanted to rebuild a national body to give housing schemes a political voice and to push to end the housing crisis. That’s why I got involved with Living Rent, organising my community to become their first branch. Little did I know that would lead to a brush with crazed gender ideology, and see Queer Theory used to try to destroy it.
We’re still trying not to pay attention to the election because it’s so tedious and awful and pointless, but this is worth putting on the record because it’s in The National and otherwise nobody’s going to read it.
Holiday Boy has of course chosen the general election campaign to spend the next three weeks feeding stray cats somewhere sunny, so here’s a cartoon by the brilliant webcomicname that summarises the Baillie Gifford story for anyone joining us late.
January 2018, with no general election due for four and a half years: “I very rarely talk about Scottish independence in the chamber, because I talk about things that matter”
June 2024, with an election in four weeks and a £91,346 salary, expenses and pension at stake: “ROBERT THE BRUCE! BANNOCKBURN! DECLARATION OF ARBROATH! FLOWER OF SCOTLAND! FREEEEEEEEEDOOOOOOMMMM!”
Sven on Looking up at the stars: “I believe we all know that the answer to your query as to, “why, when some MP resigns fro a…” Mar 11, 13:48
Hatey McHateface on Looking up at the stars: “Did you know that already, or did you look it up? 🙂 My money’s on the latter, and I’ve stuck…” Mar 11, 13:25
robertkknight on Looking up at the stars: “Holyrood rammed full of yoons of varying political shades and persuasions, who frankly couldn’t run a bath let alone a…” Mar 11, 12:51
Sven on Looking up at the stars: “The first verifiable recorded instance of the phrase, “The penny dropped” of which I’m aware is that cited in the…” Mar 11, 12:24
Geri on Looking up at the stars: “No. Prior to indyref we were an equal partner in that wonderful family of nations remember? In a voluntary union…” Mar 11, 11:42
Hatey McHateface on Scotland’s Most Frightened: ““no need to withdraw from something that does not exist” My exact response to every one of those crowdfunding grifters,…” Mar 11, 11:34
Hatey McHateface on Looking up at the stars: “Could be worse, Onlooker. Isn’t the Indy movement sprinkled with simpering pathetic fools who have renamed themselves ‘Hamassa’?” Mar 11, 11:30
Hatey McHateface on Looking up at the stars: “Does that mean the UK may not have only two days of gas left? OK. I’ll answer. Yes it does.…” Mar 11, 11:27
Hatey McHateface on Looking up at the stars: “Dinna be daft, x. Penny Falls machines, from which the term originates, didn’t exist before 1964.” Mar 11, 11:20
diabloandco on Looking up at the stars: “The Lib Dums proved themselves duplicitous during Jim Wallace’s time as leader. Can someone tell me why , when some…” Mar 11, 11:19
Hatey McHateface on Looking up at the stars: “Aye, Geri, you do well to warn ordinary Scots about Baphomet. Any signs of your new hereditary king? I read…” Mar 11, 11:14
Onlooker on Looking up at the stars: “I liked when the simpering pathetic fool renamed himself ‘Hamala’ during the last yank election and ran off to the…” Mar 11, 10:45
agentx on Looking up at the stars: “James Che says: 11 March, 2026 at 9:23 am One day the penny will drop ————————————– It’s only taken 319…” Mar 11, 10:27
Geri on Looking up at the stars: “They’ve been referred to as Lib Dumbs for over a decade at least. Remember the tuition fee fiasco where the…” Mar 11, 09:41
James Che on Looking up at the stars: “The so called Scottish Elections are a farce, The devolved governance sent to Scotland under the laws of the England…” Mar 11, 09:30
James Che on Looking up at the stars: “One day the penny will drop, Scotland, Ireland, Wales and England will wake up to the historical records and realise…” Mar 11, 09:23
James Che on Looking up at the stars: “Peter McAvoy, English votes for English laws, The Anglo- Irish Agreement in 1800, [ Scotland not Included ] set up…” Mar 11, 09:13
Sven on Looking up at the stars: “Did anyone ever seriously doubt that the LDs, at any level, in any constituency would sell out to anyone for…” Mar 11, 08:46
Aidan on Looking up at the stars: ““Lib Dumb” – you’re so witty and clever James, will you be at the fringe this year? Northcode has told…” Mar 11, 06:14
Young Lochinvar on Scotland’s Most Frightened: “HMcH @ 4.06 You have to be joking “old boy”! Scotchland Office seat warmers like yerself would probably be exempt…” Mar 11, 05:03
James Barr Gardner on Looking up at the stars: “Bring back Wee Willie Rennie, he was funnier…….” Mar 11, 02:46
Peter McAvoy on Looking up at the stars: “Will they cooperate to oppose the planned scrapping of jury trials in England and Wales,or remind Westminster of how these…” Mar 11, 01:38
Cynicus on Looking up at the stars: “Geri says: 10 March, 2026 at 9:45 pm “I dunno how he has the nerve to even collect a salary…” Mar 11, 01:12
Cynicus on Looking up at the stars: “Scot Finlayson says: 10 March, 2026 at 9:18 pm, `A carpetbagger is a derogatory name term for an outsider….. ..It…” Mar 11, 00:54
James on Looking up at the stars: “There’s a dark underbelly in the Lib Dumb movement. “Movement” being the operative word. Speaking of which – where’s Adrian…” Mar 10, 23:12
Geri on Looking up at the stars: “I dunno how he has the nerve to even collect a salary after he said Scotland shouldn’t be allowed to…” Mar 10, 21:45
Iain More on Looking up at the stars: “I have nothing to add to what has been said already although to refer to him as a wank stain…” Mar 10, 21:25
Scot Finlayson on Looking up at the stars: “Hamilton is an English carpetbagger, `A carpetbagger is a derogatory term for an outsider—historically a Northerner in the post-Civil War…” Mar 10, 21:18
