Billions of years from now, when the Sun finally dies and expands to swallow and burn up the Earth in a final cataclysmic explosion, the very last thing to turn to dust and atoms will be Scottish Labour’s brass neck.
Coming from The Eternal Abstainers themselves that’s already quite a breathtakingly hypocritical claim, but if you look at last night’s results closely it gets a lot worse.
Wings Over Scotland isn’t the only website dedicated to scrutinising the truthfulness of things claimed by politicians and media pundits. There’s the widely-respected and diligent FullFact.org, there’s Scotland’s own The Ferret, and there’s the BBC’s Reality Check (which frequently takes the more unconventional approach of, er, not making a finding either way about what the reality of things is).
And then there’s Channel 4’s FactCheck, which we’re going to generously assume had a liquid lunch yesterday and was a little under the weather.
Because not only is the conclusion that it reached on the subject of an independent Scotland having to use the Euro utter nonsense that’s been debunked roughly 1000 times in the last six years, it doesn’t even agree with itself.
Michael Glackin of the Sunday Times is the only serious contender to the Scotsman’s demented Brian Wilson as the most poisonously, blindly instinctive hater of anything even passingly connected to the SNP or independence in the Scottish media. His weekly bilious rants in the paper make even Scottish Daily Express hacks wince and say “Blimey, that’s a bit strong”.
But even by those standards, this week’s column is quite something. So let’s take a little look at just how much of an idiot you can make of yourself if you never allow facts to get in the way of your rage.
Watching the Six Nations rugby tournament every year is usually quite a dispiriting experience – not just because of Scotland’s invariably underwhelming performances (broken up by the occasional false dawn), but because talking about it on social media always results in an extremely tedious flood of comments about how rugby is a sport played and watched exclusively by middle-class Tory No voters.
(That’s Scotland skipper Greig Laidlaw there, with Wings mascot Hamish.)
Speaking as someone whose interest in the tournament (in the pre-inflation days when it was the Five Nations) was first sparked when my extremely working-class Bathgate comprehensive school started taking pupils to Murrayfield in the 1980s – 50p for the bus and 50p for the match ticket, which got you a seat on wooden benches actually on the grass – this attitude has always instinctively felt like complete nonsense.
So when we did our latest Panelbase poll during this year’s competition, we figured we may as well actually find out.
Self-propelling brain vacancy Alex Cole-Hamilton might have just recorded the shortest ever reign at the top of our Thickest Politician In Scotland rankings, but you can’t keep a proper idiot down for long.
It probably goes without saying that none of the above is even a little bit true.
Unionists have been in a purple frenzy of rage in the last couple of weeks that the First Minister has dared to leave the country not once but twice in order to try to improve relations and trade links with Scotland’s business partners. Lib Dem MSP Alex Cole-Hamilton – a man who still thinks the Queensferry Crossing isn’t finished a year and a half after traffic started using it – tried a different tack.
And that’s a zinger of a point unless oh dear what’s this?
We had an interesting exchange with Scottish Labour MP Paul Sweeney this week on the deathless lie that is the “fiscal transfer” – the £10bn or so that Unionists rather startlingly insist the rest of the UK generously donates to Scotland every year out of the goodness of its heart, just for the pleasure of our company.
As you can see, the debate was of a high intellectual standard.
Alert readers will recall that earlier today we conducted one of our regular context checks for statistics misleadingly-incompletely reported in the Scottish press. But while those are like shooting fish in a barrel, there’s one thing that’s an even more reliable open goal for the website editor looking for content in a slow news week.
Ladies and gentlemen, once again we give you… Scottish Labour.
There’s absolutely nothing that happens in Scotland that Scottish Labour are happy with. Day in and day out they can be found putting the bleakest possible spin on any statistic for a dwindling audience of diehard supporters and Scottish journalists.
Something bad happened? SCOTLAND IS TERRIBLE AND IT’S ALL THE SNP’S FAULT. Something good happened? IT WASN’T GOOD ENOUGH AND IT’S ALL THE SNP’S FAULT. And the solution is always the same: let Labour run things.
Earlier on today we reported on a case of a Scottish Labour MP being inadvertently unacquainted with some quite pertinent facts regarding a public pronouncement they’d made. While we’d assumed this to be an isolated incident, it’s in fact our sad duty to report another example within the Northern Branch Office.
That’s the pro-Brexit former Labour minister Tom Harris, there, making just the sort of statement that this site like to fact-check. So let’s see the most recent data.
Young Lochinvar on The quality of mercy: “%er I don’t actually think the National comic and BIS have really that much influence on the majority ie Joe…” Apr 8, 19:13
Young Lochinvar on The quality of mercy: “C Meant to respond, aye, the auld alliance had its ups and downs but it was big French aid to…” Apr 8, 18:48
100%Yes on The quality of mercy: “We have recent polls suggesting that the SNP is going to get a outright majority or the SNP is going…” Apr 8, 18:44
Bilbo on The quality of mercy: “Cynicus says: 8 April, 2026 at 10:43 am TACO Trump is employing Madman theory: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Madman_theory The problem is how does…” Apr 8, 18:29
agentx on The quality of mercy: “Alf Baird says:”Hence the Alliance to Liberate Scotland Party standing at this election means the people are finally beginning to…” Apr 8, 17:43
Mark Beggan on The quality of mercy: “The very same system that allows the worst in our society to sneak in and spread their poison. Progressives are…” Apr 8, 17:21
Young Lochinvar on The quality of mercy: “C Amen to that! However even though they found Dick da Turds corpse in a Leicester municipal car park, they…” Apr 8, 17:17
Aidan on The quality of mercy: “When did this recession occur which knocked 30% off the value of the Scottish economy to give a $200bn dollar…” Apr 8, 17:00
Alf Baird on The quality of mercy: “Three hunner year o colonial oppression does result in a certain pathology, Sven, whereby theday almost half o Scots still…” Apr 8, 16:25
Alf Baird on The quality of mercy: ““Ireland (no oil), Norway (oil), Switzerland (banking) have GDPs in the range of 600-800B USD. Ours is 200B USD. Liechtenstein…” Apr 8, 16:16
James on The quality of mercy: “The water shortage headline reads “Britain” then the article reads “England”. Funny that, eh? Oh, and aren’t house Yoons Wilma…” Apr 8, 15:58
Cynicus on The quality of mercy: “TURABDIN says: 6 April, 2026 at 4:56 pm From WIKI:?«The earliest use of the term appears in 1507, when King…” Apr 8, 15:18
Northcode on The quality of mercy: “Due to the proliferation of mindless, illiterate and ill-informed pish scribbled doun in this place by colonialists (unionists if preferred……” Apr 8, 14:52
Sven on The quality of mercy: “Mark Beggan @ 14.11. Mot a country of deranged morons … more a devolved administration of deranged morons elected under…” Apr 8, 14:29
Northcode on The quality of mercy: “Nae ither folk bar the Scots thersels hae the nous, the knawledge or the experiens o mony generaciouns, tae unnerstaun…” Apr 8, 14:14
Confused on The quality of mercy: “Reality check time. The only relevant benchmark for Scotland’s ECONOMIC POTENTIAL is with our small nation peers, most of whom…” Apr 8, 14:12
Mark Beggan on The quality of mercy: “Never mind the oil. The world sees Scotland as a Lady Boy. A country of very confused, weak and deranged…” Apr 8, 14:11
Confused on The quality of mercy: “they just won’t give it a fucking rest, will they – frog face weighing in https://archive.ph/cHiZ4 – but, but -…” Apr 8, 14:09
Aidan on The quality of mercy: “Well if it’s all been done before, why are you so utterly clueless about it and posting (in that last…” Apr 8, 13:38
Dan on The quality of mercy: “Ooh, an lse report… oh aye, this had been done to death long before Johnny come lately Aidan turned up.…” Apr 8, 13:11
Aidan on The quality of mercy: “Do you have a link to those figures “James”, since I can’t find them anywhere. What I can find is…” Apr 8, 12:52
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on The quality of mercy: “BANNED DOCUMENTARY ON SCOTTISH OIL (The McCrone Report) « Tha paipeirean oifigeil a bha dìomhair ach a-nis air am fosgladh,…” Apr 8, 12:49
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on The quality of mercy: “McCRONE REPORT – Scotland’s Hidden Oil Wealth « In 1974 the Tory government under Edward Heath commissioned a report by…” Apr 8, 12:42
Captain Caveman on The quality of mercy: “Well, I guess you had better start rummaging that amongst that great big steaming pile of unwashed kecks, empty beer…” Apr 8, 12:32
Alf Baird on The quality of mercy: “Names are names, colonial plunder is colonial plunder. Whaur’s oor oil money, an for aw else tae, ower the past…” Apr 8, 12:06
James on The quality of mercy: ““According to 2013 figures from Fraser Of Allander Institute economist Brian Ashcroft – husband of former Scottish Labour leader Wendy…” Apr 8, 11:58
Captain Caveman on The quality of mercy: “““As of April 7, 2026, oil prices are high and volatile due to supply concerns, with global benchmark Brent Crude…” Apr 8, 11:54
James on The quality of mercy: “Apt coincidence though, eh? Doncha think, “Agent”?” Apr 8, 11:53
Captain Caveman on The quality of mercy: ““Is it down to lack of means, or is it a tactic acknowledgement that deep down they know the money…” Apr 8, 11:46
agentx on The quality of mercy: “@ james “Shell initially named all of its UK oil fields after seabirds in alphabetical order by discovery – Auk,…” Apr 8, 11:27