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Pete’s Perfect Plan 241

Posted on November 24, 2020 by

We don’t mind admitting we were quivering with anticipation, readers.

So let’s go.

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Any minute now 129

Posted on November 22, 2020 by

From 2016 (and another classic in the “missing words” category).

We were keen to read the article, obviously.

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New military spending plans revealed 139

Posted on November 21, 2020 by

Taking the wheel 176

Posted on November 18, 2020 by

Some years ago, a friend of mine was on a car journey along the motorway, with their brother driving. The night before there had been a storm and high winds. The bad weather had continued into the morning before easing, but the wind was still strong.

They were chatting in the car and as they continued to chat, my friend noticed that further along, a motorway stanchion that holds the lights had fallen across their path. It was blocking two of the three lanes, including the one that they were on. Despite that, they continued to chat as if it wasn’t there.

The obstacle drew nearer and nearer. Finally my friend said to his brother, “Aren’t you going to drive round that light?” His brother swerved and made it into the unblocked lane with feet to spare.

I asked my friend why they hadn’t swerved sooner. “Neither of us could believe it was there”, he said.

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Almost there 38

Posted on November 18, 2020 by

We genuinely empathise, anonymous senior Scottish Tory.

If only there was some solution available.

Mushroom food 594

Posted on November 15, 2020 by

We were going to write a post about today’s Sunday National front page lead story, but it would just have been an angry rant, so instead we’ll let our readers make their own judgements on how convinced they are by this bloviating guff:

Try to keep it clean, folks.

The generations game 202

Posted on November 14, 2020 by

The surrender of power 143

Posted on November 13, 2020 by

On 18 September 2014, Scotland had control over its future. Scots could choose their own path, or continue to have decisions imposed upon them. Those of us supporting the former came close but not close enough. As a result, Scotland exited the EU against its will, is once more under the heel of a right-wing government and now finds its Parliament under attack from London.

Yet the dream has never died and demands for the right to choose our own destiny are growing. Scotland needs to be in the position it held on 18 September 2014, when power lay with its people. It’s their democratic right to decide, so why would you ever cede that power?

Yet tragically that’s what’s being done.

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Agents of fear 288

Posted on November 08, 2020 by

No explanation is given for why “writer at large” Neil Mackay has suddenly conducted a “wide-ranging, exclusive interview” with “one of Britain’s most senior spy chiefs” for today’s Herald On Sunday.

As far as we’re aware absolutely nothing has happened in respect of the UK’s nuclear “deterrent” to make the subject topical. Maybe Mackay just coincidentally bumped into Sir David Omand down the pub or something.

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The Scottish Toady 139

Posted on November 07, 2020 by

Brass rubbing 79

Posted on November 06, 2020 by

We have to admit the line below takes some chutzpah to even attempt. It’s a little bit like Harold Shipman refusing to admit to all the murders he committed on the grounds that revealing the victim/patients’ personal data would break the Hippocratic Oath.

We know, for an absolute and uncontested fact, by the Scottish Government’s own admission, that the First Minister has already committed the most serious breach of the Ministerial Code possible – lying to Parliament (section 1.3c). She lied about the date she first knew of the allegations against Salmond.

From the First Minister’s own personal written testimony, we know that the reason she lied to Parliament was that she had definitely also committed another breach of the Code, either by using Scottish Parliament premises for party matters (section 1.3i) or by failing to record government business discussed therein (sections 4.22, 4.23).

So it seems a bit late to be getting all bashful about the Code now.

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Nine Times That Same Song 126

Posted on November 05, 2020 by

Last year I was booed on the stage of the SNP’s annual conference for attempting to have a debate on how we can achieve independence in the face of Boris Johnson’s unswerving refusal to agree to a referendum.

I know that it still sticks in the craw of many that an SNP representative was booed at an SNP conference for wanting to discuss how Scotland will become independent (the very idea!), but it only made me even more determined to ensure that the democratic voice of Scotland is heard.

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    • Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: “Anybody ken if the brain is an organ? Only, Geri’s interminable rants, and her recent claim of organ snatching, have…Mar 2, 17:57
    • Mark Beggan on Two Men Unalike: “NEWS FLASH News just in. The Iranian revolutionary council is having a crisis meeting in hell.Mar 2, 17:49
    • Marie on Two Men Unalike: “You would be a second class citizen in Isr Hatey. And if you owned land in West Bank it will…Mar 2, 17:44
    • Aidan on Two Men Unalike: “It’s quite amazing Geri that apparently all this has been achieved by countries with no economies, no resources and weapons…Mar 2, 17:37
    • Mark Beggan on Two Men Unalike: “Yes even here in Bonnie Scotland. The patchwork of Leftwing, at whatever level in society, all have the same rabid…Mar 2, 17:36
    • Geri on Two Men Unalike: “One thing is crystal clear on the Scottish Independence front, Sunshine . Do not, under any circumstances, have your military…Mar 2, 17:35
    • Confused on Two Men Unalike: “you admit you know fuck-all, but then have a pop anyway … how does that even make sense? – I…Mar 2, 17:28
    • Geri on Two Men Unalike: ““I never post about airborne warfare.” Oh yes you do. Yer never done phappin over F-16s even though they’ve done…Mar 2, 17:22
    • Geri on Two Men Unalike: “Tell the Iranians what? You wee warhawks believe any old crap the BBC propagandists tell you. There are Christians &…Mar 2, 17:11
    • Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: ““what expertise do you have in airborne warfare?” Compared with your obsessional butt monomania, Confused, none at all. I never…Mar 2, 17:00
    • Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: “Nah, Mark. The War started a little over 4 years ago. It’s being fought on many fronts. Few of the…Mar 2, 16:52
    • TURABDIN on Two Men Unalike: “WELL, you couldn’t make this up, Trump fan Iranians on socials do a «victory» dance with a fist gesture that…Mar 2, 16:51
    • Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: “@Geri You inspire us all. The vision of an Independent Scotland you conjure up must be worth hundreds of thousands…Mar 2, 16:37
    • Confused on Two Men Unalike: “not much of a rebuttal there – I mean you have to offer an actual rebuttal, not generalised statements about…Mar 2, 16:32
    • Mark Beggan on Two Men Unalike: “Are we witnessing the beginning of the war against Ideology in whatever rabid form it manifests itself in.Mar 2, 16:27
    • Iain More on Two Men Unalike: “Off Topic In relation to the Sassanach Tax Exiles in Dubai who are presently filling their breeks – Fuck Them!…Mar 2, 16:25
    • TURABDIN on Two Men Unalike: “A word in Scotland’s delicate ear BREWDOG, a brewer not like the rest. American buy up, of course. Trust us,…Mar 2, 16:24
    • Mark Beggan on Two Men Unalike: “Tell that to the Iranians.Mar 2, 16:23
    • Geri on Two Men Unalike: “Nope! It wasn’t. I pointed out your fake concern & hypocrisy over a kidnapped child while hundreds of them lay…Mar 2, 16:19
    • Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: ““They don’t reject Christ. Far from it.” So true, Geri. My local church is hoaching with former followers of the…Mar 2, 16:16
    • Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: “There, there, Confused, you’ll feel better now. Ah ken it’s difficult for you when people point out you don’t have…Mar 2, 16:07
    • Geri on Two Men Unalike: “Islam has more in common with Christianity than you’d care to admit. They don’t reject Christ. Far from it. Unlike…Mar 2, 16:04
    • Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: ““sick bastards who took out a school full of weans” I told you before, Geri, stop it! You’re making me…Mar 2, 15:59
    • Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: ““just sailed signal intae town” If that’s the popular toothpaste brand you’re referring to, Geri, you should capitalise it in…Mar 2, 15:52
    • Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: “I have the power to summon Implants! Currently takes a bit over an hour. But I may work on getting…Mar 2, 15:46
    • Mark Beggan on Two Men Unalike: ““Islam is as dangerous in a man as rabies in a dog”Mar 2, 15:45
    • Geri on Two Men Unalike: “Whit? You mean the great Oz didn’t have that capability either? Dinnie fash, the other Eastern friends have jamming &…Mar 2, 15:27
    • Geri on Two Men Unalike: “Listen up, fuckwit..no one in the region either likes you or wants you there. No one. The West won’t be…Mar 2, 15:23
    • DaveL on Two Men Unalike: ““Best in the world”? Is that why they’re getting beat? Big and shiny like the yanks no doubt.Mar 2, 15:04
    • Breastplate on Two Men Unalike: “Remember to check under the bed before going to sleep tonight, John.Mar 2, 15:02
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