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Monkeys obscured by peanuts 6

Posted on December 21, 2012 by

There’s been much hot air unleashed in Holyrood in recent weeks over various “wastes” of money by the Scottish Government. First the opposition accused the SNP of spending £100,000 (which turned out to be a wild piece of back-of-a-fag-packet guesswork vastly overestimating the actual £4,000 cost) in fighting a Freedom Of Information request over EU legal advice. Then there were complaints about £48,000 spent sending a team to the premiere of Brave, despite the obvious benefits to be had marketing Scotland’s tourism industry on the back of the movie.

And finally, Labour in particular screamed themselves hoarse (and were still doing so as recently as yesterday’s FMQs) about the £470,000 the Scottish Government delegation to the Ryder Cup cost, even though it was a contractual obligation, encompassed numerous other business engagements which generated Scottish jobs, and in fact represented a 30% saving on comparable trips by the last Labour-led Holyrood administration. (Which weren’t contractual obligations.)

But still. If just for the sake of argument you were to accept the Unionist parties’ line, that’s a whopping £522,000 the Scottish Government has cavalierly thrown away in recent months. Meanwhile, how has the UK government in Westminster been doing?

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Scottish Labour policy adjustment 35

Posted on December 20, 2012 by

This was the “Education” page of the Scottish Labour website this morning:

After Alex Salmond referred to it at FMQs, the page has now been deftly amended to fall in line with the rest of party policy, as you can see in the image below:

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Trivial pursuits 28

Posted on December 20, 2012 by

Okay, so here’s a fun teaser you can try out around the table after your Christmas dinner. What do the following far-flung countries have in common: Canada, Togo, Uzbekistan, Sierra Leone, Guinea, Gabon, Panama, Zambia, Haiti, Libya and the Cape Verde Islands? Give up? Here’s a clue:

Yep – all of them, and 60 other nations too, are now officially better at football than Scotland. Entirely coincidentally, in the same week this dismaying fact was revealed, it was confirmed that former national coach Craig Levein was to sue the SFA for only offering to pay him £35,000 a month for the next year-and-a-half to sit around and scratch his arse in front of the Jeremy Kyle Show.

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The condensed Lamont 23

Posted on December 20, 2012 by

We don’t often get to see Johann Lamont on the telly, so when she made one of her rare appearances in a five-minute interview with STV’s excellent Bernard Ponsonby this week we couldn’t only do half a job. As we’re still stuck in the house fighting off this year’s unusually-horrible and persistent germs – and as Lamont repeated most of the speech at today’s FMQs – we steeled ourselves, sat down with a large medicinal hot toddy and transcribed the rest of the piece.

What with it being Christmas and everything, though, you’re probably busy, so if you’re in a rush we’ve condensed all of Johann’s umming and aahing and stumbling and waffling down to its essence, where there is such a thing. The parts highlighted in red below are all you really need to read.

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A letter to the Herald 56

Posted on December 19, 2012 by

21st November 2012

Dear Sir,

The Herald was the daily newspaper in our house when I was a child. My parents took both it and the Evening Times. When I started to outgrow the Bunty I eschewed the Jackie and its like and graduated straight to the newspapers. My father cancelled his Evening Times subscription when I was coming up to my Highers because he thought reading two newspapers every evening was interfering with my homework.

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Jackie Baillie is a liar 97

Posted on December 19, 2012 by

We’ve spent the last 90 minutes watching an incredible video someone linked us to in a reader comment earlier today. It’s a public meeting of the Clydebank Trades Union Council on November 29th, headed by a panel comprising Gil Paterson (SNP MSP for Clydebank and Milngavie), Jackie Baillie (Labour MSP for Dumbarton), chairman Tom Paterson (secretary of Clydebank TUC), Stephen Boyd (assistant secretary of Scottish TUC) and Cathy Leach (Scottish Pensioners’ Forum).

Throughout the meeting the sense of anger and hurt coming from the traditionally-Labour audience and directed mostly at Baillie is overwhelming. Time and again the party’s betrayal of its core audience is bitterly attacked. But an hour and 25 seconds in, there’s a particularly remarkable exchange.

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Opting in with Johann Lamont 49

Posted on December 17, 2012 by

Nick Clegg’s speech on demonising and punishing the poor and sick (in which he displayed a heroic willingness to take one for the coalition team by declaring “the Liberal Democrats are now the party of welfare reform”) brought the issue of the “something for nothing” culture back to the forefront today.

Scots, of course, are already familiar with the leader of the Holyrood opposition standing up and angrily telling the chamber how unsustainable and morally wrong it is that well-off people such as herself are entitled to universal benefits at state expense.

Yet numerous reports emphasise that universality is a solution that’s practical as well as desirable, because it’s economically efficient as well as solving the problem of people suffering because they’re unable or unwilling to claim benefits they need and ultimately costing the state far more money in remedial care.

It’s a tricky old pickle and no mistake. So entirely free of charge, we’ve had a wee think and come up with a policy that squares the circle, so that Johann Lamont can offer to solve the problem without condemning hundreds of thousands of vulnerable Scots (and Labour MSPs) to lives of unending misery.

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So long, and thanks for all the fish? 79

Posted on December 16, 2012 by

There’s been a lot of talk recently about the implications of independence for Scotland and its membership of the EU. As we’ve noted this week, the SNP has long acknowledged that the Scottish government would have to renegotiate terms of EU membership, but it’s highly unlikely that the EU would move to expel Scotland from the EU given the interaction between Scotland and the continent in goods, services, finances and people. As John Swinney recently noted:

“Scotland would not be applying for membership. Scotland is already a member of the European Union, our citizens are EU citizens today, we follow all of the EU relevant provisions that we are required to follow.

“So the key point is any negotiation would be taking place not to apply for membership, but for membership from within the European Union, which is the key distinction which has to be remembered in this debate.

“What we have always accepted is there has to be a negotiation about the detail and the terms of Scotland’s membership of the European Union, but crucially that will be taking place at a time when we are still part of the United Kingdom, still part of the European Union, of which we have been members for 40 years.

But if, just for the sake of argument Scotland was declared a new state and somehow cast out of this expansionist community, would it be the end? By being declared a brand-new nation Scotland would inherit all of the fixed assets and natural resources within our internationally-recognised borders, but none of the obligations of the old state – like a share of the national debt or being bound by international treaties.

Tempting, no? Sure, it would be awkward for a while, what with having to negotiate new treaties and being known as the only country in European history that the EU didn’t want in it, but there are alternatives to the EU.

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The devil’s advocates 76

Posted on December 11, 2012 by

The Irish Times, 26 November 2012:

“The DUP will campaign against Scotland voting for independence in 2014, party deputy leader Nigel Dodds told his party’s annual conference on Saturday. The North Belfast MP said that Unionists watched with sadness the attempt by Scottish nationalists to “undo the bonds of union which bound us through history”.

“But just as we have advocated the Union here in Northern Ireland, so we will be the advocates for the union in the midst of a Scottish referendum. Just as we have been proved right here, so, I believe, the people of Scotland will see that we are better together, better when we are united as one,” said Mr Dodds.

“This party believes strongly that, together, the United Kingdom has significant influence in the world. The break-up of the Union would be financially, culturally and politically devastating for all of the British people. As Unionists we oppose any action that would erode the shared cohesion of the constituent parts which make up this kingdom,” he said.”

Yes. We saw you “advocating the Union” last week.

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Civic nationalism vs British nationalism 27

Posted on December 11, 2012 by

The modern Scottish independence movement is 84 years old, dating back to the 1928 formation of the National Party of Scotland, forerunner to the SNP. It is a peaceful, inclusive, civic and democratic movement – to the best of our knowledge, and almost uniquely, not a single life has been lost in pursuit of Scottish independence.

Despite this, so-called “Unionists” (more properly described as British nationalists) still regularly try to portray independence campaigners as violent racists. As recently as a few days ago, one prominent Labour activist frequently employed as a commentator on BBC Scotland political shows attempted to perpetuate baseless (but oft-repeated by Unionists) 70-year-old smears that the former SNP leader Arthur Donaldson was a Nazi sympathiser engaged in attempts to collaborate with the Germans during WW2, sabotage the British war effort and set up a Vichy-style government in Scotland. These claims were cited, astonishingly, as evidence of “the SNP’s fascist past”.

Such attacks are all the more bizarre given the constant reminders on the news that the only nationalists attempting to secure their goals by violence in the United Kingdom are those who do so in the name of Britishness, waving the Union Jack.

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Scots would remain EU citizens 55

Posted on December 10, 2012 by

Jose Manuel Barroso, the president of the European Commission, has said that in the event that Scotland votes for independence in 2014 then the new state of Scotland would have to apply for EU membership all over again. Well, I hope Scottish residents vote to stay in the UK and I think the possibility that they may not is mainly media and political hype. But I’d hate to see the kind of tosh we’re being treated to today become central to what should, after all, be a serious debate.

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Some brief facts about the EU 68

Posted on December 10, 2012 by

Unionists are very excited this afternoon about the latest development in the EU membership debate. A BBC interview with European Commission president Jose Manuel Barroso repeated the assertion (or rather, the deduction from an implication) that an independent Scotland would have to apply for entry to the European Union as a new state. We’ll limit ourselves to a few factual observations.

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    • 100%Yes on The Truth Does Out: “Wings, Robin Mcalpine is in total agreement with you regarding the above. Any SNP member could make a formal complaint…Jun 3, 22:17
    • joolz on The Truth Does Out: “The accounts were handed out at NEC meetings. Even those of us who aren’t accountants could see that there was…Jun 3, 22:14
    • Mark Beggan on The Truth Does Out: “They’re stupid. How would they know any difference. We had a special classroom for those kids. They would get crayons…Jun 3, 21:45
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    • Spade on The Truth Does Out: “And let’s not forget; while they were doing everything possible to avoid being held to account for a something that…Jun 3, 21:37
    • willie on The Truth Does Out: “Another excellent piece of journalism setting out fraud perpetrated on people who were enticed into giving donations to a faux…Jun 3, 21:35
    • Mark Beggan on The Truth Does Out: “It’s because they’re Globalists not Unionists.Jun 3, 21:30
    • Northcode on Up The Hill And Down The Slope: ““What’s your excuse for savaging poor Lorncal like that.. You MUST have known I would correct my mistake and yet…Jun 3, 21:26
    • Hatey McHateface on Up The Hill And Down The Slope: “Ironic. And endemic.Jun 3, 21:26
    • Hatey McHateface on Up The Hill And Down The Slope: “I’m touched that you maintain a stock response ready to cut and paste, just for me, Northy. But it would…Jun 3, 21:24
    • Hatey McHateface on Up The Hill And Down The Slope: “What’s your excuse for savaging poor Lorncal like that, Northy? Too much weeping into your dram? Try to hit the…Jun 3, 21:14
    • Graham white on The Truth Does Out: “If we had voted SNP1 and Alba2. Hmm It’s either Sturgeons pettiness and hatred for Salmond. Or They never wanted…Jun 3, 21:13
    • Hatey Mchateface on The Truth Does Out: “Thanks, Karen. By the logic of Scotland’s very own Hate Crimes Act (still un-repealed, despite the election only 4 weeks…Jun 3, 21:10
    • 100%Yes on The Truth Does Out: “Criminal charges need to be brought to those who have made false statements regarding the Independence fund, like wings said…Jun 3, 21:09
    • James Jones on Up The Hill And Down The Slope: “People still wishing that the UK government had saved Scotland from itself while also wanting independence. Ironic. I wish the…Jun 3, 21:06
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    • Lorraine on Up The Hill And Down The Slope: “That’s the story being told anyways. The books were in the black even if there had been fraud (which is…Jun 3, 21:03
    • Mark Beggan on The Truth Does Out: “This is Organised Crime. Don’t Police Scotland have special powers in dealing with such crime gangs?Jun 3, 20:58
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    • Northcode on Up The Hill And Down The Slope: ““It’s bringing tears of laughter to my gless eye…” Judging by the poor quality of your retorts my wit must…Jun 3, 20:56
    • Hatey McHateface on The Truth Does Out: ““Its time to end the coruuption in the Scottish legal system” Naw. That ship has sailed. It won’t be returning…Jun 3, 20:53
    • Hatey McHateface on The Truth Does Out: “Naw. SNP members aren’t the general public in Scotland. Neither are Indy supporters. They amount to a bit less than…Jun 3, 20:45
    • Karen on The Truth Does Out: “Yes, dyscalculia.Jun 3, 20:40
    • Doug on The Truth Does Out: “If Swinney has the unmitigated gall to wear a Scotland top when he runs away to America to watch McTominay…Jun 3, 20:38
    • Hatey McHateface on The Truth Does Out: “It’s very easy for you to prove your suspicions, Shug. Just list all the charismatic, competent, principled, honest, driven, Scottish…Jun 3, 20:34
    • Karen on The Truth Does Out: “Can I just say: https://www.scottishlegal.com/articles/michael-russell-appointed-as-chair-of-scottish-land-commission-amid-claims-of-corruptionJun 3, 20:30
    • Hatey McHateface on The Truth Does Out: “Is there such a thing as “number blindness”? Like “word blindness” – dyslexia? It’s surely disgraceful to hound people just…Jun 3, 20:29
    • Frank Gillougley on The Truth Does Out: “So that’s it then. Just like that. Chief bullshitter employs usual word salad weasly verbage to say in a helluva…Jun 3, 20:28
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