An alert reader received a letter today about the forthcoming general election, from Scottish Labour’s only current MP, Ian Murray. (Although you’d have to know that in advance, as he doesn’t mention the Labour Party in it once.)
Here’s a close-up of part of it:
And below, we swear, is what’s on the other side of the page.
Today the Scottish Parliament spent several hours heatedly debating a motion to call for a second Section 30 order to enable a new independence referendum (several more will follow tomorrow before the vote). We watched all of it so you didn’t have to, and are delighted to present you with a few clips that probably won’t make the news.
On such a momentous topic, this was the intervention that Scottish Labour list MSP Monica Lennon felt was the most pressing issue to raise, for example:
We’re very touched, obviously, and will add it to our file of other mentions in the chamber and elsewhere. But there were probably more important things to discuss.
Almost a year ago we ran a short piece mocking a Scotsman headline which claimed that “THOUSANDS” of people had signed a Tory anti-referendum petition, when the actual number was a strictly-accurate-but-pathetic TWO thousand.
We didn’t think that could ever be beaten for technically-true hyperbolic exaggeration, but we’d reckoned without the bold boundary-pushing ingenuity of the Daily Express.
Hundreds of thousands? How many hundreds, exactly?
Because when you really want people with their finger on the pulse of Scottish politics to analyse the implications of the Supreme Court decision on Brexit, where else would you go but to Channel 5’s The Wright Stuff, to hear from um, former rugby league star and haircut pioneer Martin Offiah?
You very rarely get useful stats about online newspaper readership, so we were quite intrigued by this snippet on tonight’s BBC2 Scotland documentary “Paper Thistle”, about the 200th anniversary of The Scotsman.
We don’t know what the numbers are or how brief the period was, but Wings’ average traffic is higher now than it was in 2014, while we suspect The Scotsman is moving in the opposite direction. For a single-issue website to be anywhere even in the same ballpark as a two-centuries-old broadsheet news brand with scores of full-time writers and production staff and a daily newsstand presence is a remarkable thing indeed.
We might start doing classifieds and sport just to see what happens.
The former Chancellor of the Exchequer in today’s Press & Journal:
55-45 is “far more decisive” than 62-38? We think we’re finally beginning to understand why the last Labour government left the British economy in such a mess.
This is the demented, McCarthyite state of madness the Labour Party has reached:
This is a party now openly rejecting anyone as a member who has ever supported any other party. We’d take a minute to try to explain to them how the arithmetic of that one works out, but they’re a long, long way beyond the grasp of reason now.
One thing you can always guarantee on GERS Day is that the latest set of figures for Scotland’s devolved economy inside the UK will trigger another uncontrolled spurt of “SNP HONEYMOON OVER” articles from the nation’s dogged commentariat.
Today we’ve seen already examples (links below) from two ex-Scotsman editors, Iain Martin and Magnus Linklater, the latter popping up in the Times by way of a rather crass and unpleasant analogy involving Oswald Mosley and the Blackshirts.
And since we’d rather watch “Suicide Squad” again than spend any more time going over the arguments about GERS (and trust us, readers, we don’t say that lightly), we thought it’d be more fun if we finally got round to compiling a semi-definitive list of all the times the collective wisdom of Scotland’s media and opposition has confidently predicted the SNP’s imminent demise.
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “77 SUNSET STRIP – 1958 – TV Series – ABC www.youtube.com/watch?v=0QGvjXDIJ54” Sep 23, 00:07
Bilbo on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “A whole lot of comments and everybody and their dug sees that Hatey is talking mince but has too much…” Sep 22, 23:05
Hatey McHateface on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: ““forgot to iron his shirt” That’s a mystery. In the pic I saw of him boarding the plane to fly…” Sep 22, 22:31
Hatey McHateface on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “If you attach a vid of yourself singing “Imagine”, dressed in a fairtrade kaftan and recycled plastic shoes, you’re guaranteed…” Sep 22, 22:22
Hatey McHateface on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “You got it, Stu. Your site, your rules.” Sep 22, 22:08
Southernbystander on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “True but calling social security ‘welfare’ is a relatively recent US import and in the UK is often used with…” Sep 22, 21:47
Mark Beggan on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “‘piece-rate’ That may well have worked under the colonial system. For your information we both meet the Rev’s representatives in…” Sep 22, 21:23
Mark Beggan on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “The Mayor of Britain looked like a sixth former getting reprimanded by the headmaster. He looked as if he was…” Sep 22, 21:10
Spartan 117 on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “Gordoom went Scorched Earth on the UK in a fit of spiteful rage when the UK public didn’t like him,…” Sep 22, 21:05
Mark Beggan on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “Please call the SNP on 0800 633 5432 if you have any queries about your donation.” Sep 22, 21:02
Onlooker on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “An anti-Sturgeon (in a roundabout way) petition some of you might get a wry chuckle out of. Sign and pass…” Sep 22, 20:57
Spartan 117 on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “United Federation of Planets? I’d sign up for that, happily. A utopia where conflict and want among mankind is eliminated…” Sep 22, 20:56
Spartan 117 on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “I think we all know who’s havering. It’s the one who keeps spam-posting all day, every day BTL. Gie it…” Sep 22, 20:47
Hatey McHateface on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “Wheesht! If that story gets out all the SNP-supporting Scots who think likewise will make her FM.” Sep 22, 19:40
Hatey McHateface on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “Ah, c’moan noo, Alf. Gie the boy a brek. Dave’s nae ganging tae ken fit “et al” means. An try…” Sep 22, 19:38
Mark Beggan on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “Collete Stevenson thinks Braveheart was a fly on the wall documentary.” Sep 22, 18:56
Hatey McHateface on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “Man! The power of social media. For the very first time ever, I post “super sized turdberg of excrement” and…” Sep 22, 18:50
Alf Baird on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “Hatey et al are clearly on a ‘piece-rate’, Dave.” Sep 22, 18:47
Hatey McHateface on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “As you were, folks. US-UK bromance is back on: https://www.theguardian.com/politics/live/2026/sep/22/andy-burnham-donald-trump-un-general-assembly-uk-politics-latest-news” Sep 22, 18:43
Hatey McHateface on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “You’re obviously unaware of my tech savviness, Bob. When I hit “Submit Comment” in reply to one of your posts,…” Sep 22, 18:41
robertkknight on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “20-25% is the norm. Simply can’t help themselves. A BTL whack-a-mole Ninja with nothing of value to add to the…” Sep 22, 18:26
Hatey McHateface on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “As it happens, Spartan, I’m on the DM Online site most days (well of course I am). I’m moderately, no,…” Sep 22, 18:15
Northcode on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “I think we’re talking about two different things. Submitting documents, speaking at side-events, or having NGOs raise issues at the…” Sep 22, 16:10
Aidan on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “Scotland has not been “recognised” in any meaningful way. Documents have been sent in, but the UN receives a whole…” Sep 22, 15:58
sam on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “Scotland has been recognised within the UN framework regarding her claim as NSGT. Documents have been submitted to the UN,…” Sep 22, 15:35
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “Short presentation by SARA SALYERS 6 days ago, on behalf of SALVO / LIBERATION SCOTLAND. www.youtube.com/watch?v=piEfPOlpI9k” Sep 22, 14:54
Spartan 117 on His Majesty’s Loyal Sabre: “Obviously nothing better to do. Likely retired or unemployed.” Sep 22, 14:38