“Scottish Labour” apparently launched its election “manifesto” somewhere in Scotland today. The “leader” of the fringe “party”, Jon Murnaghan or something, seemingly got a bit confused and made a number of pledges regarding devolved issues over which the Westminster government to be elected next month will have no control whatsoever, and would properly belong in a manifesto for the 2016 Scottish Parliament election.
Mr Morley or whatever his name is, who – assuming he wins his own seat – will be an insignificant backbench MP in the event of Ed Miliband’s Labour party winning the election, also said a bunch of other stuff about the SNP being “bad” because they refused to tell him what would be in their 2016 manifesto, further supporting the idea that the agitated branch official had lost track of what year it was.
Those are the words of David Cameron as he launched the Scottish Tories’ manifesto in front of a heavily-vetted invited audience in Glasgow yesterday. They make the pages of a couple of other papers, including the Guardian (which hides them even further down the page than the Sun does), but it’s only the Herald that picks up on their significance, leading its article with the unequivocal lines:
So, let’s just get this one straight, this morning’s English edition of The Sun – two parties with 316 seats are “stealing” an election from two parties with 309 seats?
Want us to walk you through that whole “counting” thing again?
Last night’s juxtaposition of somewhat contradictory front covers on the Herald and Scottish Daily Mail was modestly amusing, but nothing new. We pointed out weeks ago that papers on both the left and the right were – often on the same days – painting the SNP as hand-in-glove allies of either Labour or the Tories according to whatever suited their own agendas, and nothing’s changed in that respect.
But it’s interesting to take a look behind the headlines of the respective stories and see the degree to which the truth can be bent, exaggerated or in some cases simply made up from thin air.
The bald-eagle-looking chap toting the cerise tie in this clip of this morning’s Victoria Derbyshire show on the BBC News channel is Lord (Andrew) Adonis, a former Labour government minister under Tony Blair and Gordon Brown.
He also wrote the book “Five Days In May” about the latter’s unsuccessful attempt to form a coalition with the Liberal Democrats in 2010, despite having won almost 50 fewer seats than the Conservatives in that election. So he understands the process.
Lord Adonis does, in fairness, make a brief and half-hearted attempt at punting Jim Murphy’s “1924” line, but in the end he’s forced to concede (nudged along by Peter Riddell of the Institute for Government) that in fact the second-placed party forming the government is perfectly possible.
But the most remarkable thing happened at the end.
That, readers, is quite the admission. That’s a party which has utterly dominated UK politics in Scotland for six decades openly acknowledging that its entire campaign in the last three weeks will be based on railing against a complete fantasy.
The Daily Record gets up high on its outrage horse this morning with a front-page story titled “Double-crossed on devo”, echoing Jim Murphy’s claim of yesterday that the Tories’ manifesto pledge on “English votes for English laws” is a “betrayal” of the “Vow” signed by the three UK party leaders before the independence referendum.
Unsurprisingly, the Record gives rather less prominence to the news that the Vow isn’t worth the fake parchment it wasn’t written on than it did to repeatedly hyping it up and then proclaiming that it had already been delivered.
Last week we listened to a Radio Scotland phone-in debate on Trident, hosted very deftly by John Beattie, who managed to steer callers away from political points and keep the discussion on the merits or otherwise of the weapons system itself.
Sadly that didn’t dissuade the usual coterie of nutters/local councillors phoning in insisting that (a) North Korea would invade/blast Scotland off the face of the Earth the moment we let our guard down, and (b) Helensburgh would immediately revert to the Stone Age at the loss of jobs were the few hundred Trident sailors who spend about a week every year in the town to be reassigned to other posts in the navy.
We didn’t have time to ring in ourselves, but we did manage to think of a much better idea that solved both of those problems without lumbering Scotland with a gigantic nuclear white elephant, and one that would also free up an awful lot of valuable police time and resources that are currently spent arresting a bunch of hippies.
DaveL on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “Oh and by the way Hatey, you didn’t answer my earlier question with anything substantial; I’ll ask again. Are the…” Sep 19, 23:55
DaveL on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “With an apology like that I would expect a weeks worth of self flagellation to be in order as well.…” Sep 19, 23:06
sarah on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “@ Willie: thanks for raising this matter. It is yet another example of the failure by so many people who…” Sep 19, 21:29
Oneliner on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “Described as ‘House Jocks’ on Through A Scottish Prism There are many other examples of the subculture” Sep 19, 21:25
Hatey McHateface on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “Apology accepted. It was a forced error in the heat of the moment, no more than that. And Alf’s hypocrisy…” Sep 19, 20:40
Hatey McHateface on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “@Spartan My view is that anybody who is willing to sacrifice Ukr, or Isr for that matter, in exchange for…” Sep 19, 20:34
factchecker on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “Time for an apology. At at 4.22pm I posted in reply to our learned professor’s delight at Scottish independence being…” Sep 19, 20:06
Spartan 117 on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “@Hatey – The West collectively is doing its best to actively fan the flames of conflict. The nations involved are…” Sep 19, 19:59
Factchecker on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “Ah, now I understand. Being born and bred in Scotland, going to a Scottish comprehensive school and a Scottish university…” Sep 19, 19:58
Spartan 117 on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “@Factchecker – To be fair to Alf he was merely quoting 2nd hand, however his selection of sources/quotes does raise…” Sep 19, 19:54
Spartan 117 on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “What a lot of keech being spraffed here. Two PMs since 1997 were Scottish, serving a total of 13 years;…” Sep 19, 19:48
Aidan on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “Fuck me Alf – so we’ve got Vl@d, perhaps we can look to get; – Bhaal – Bughuul – the…” Sep 19, 19:48
Hatey McHateface on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: ““WM decisions are made by its MPs, not the PM” Jeezo Xaracen. How many suns do you see in the…” Sep 19, 19:13
Willie on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “To change the dial a touch this Saturday evening I was just catching up on the questions being asked in…” Sep 19, 19:12
Hatey McHateface on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “Aw, Dave, it breks ma hert ye’ve nae ither cant tae play wi.” Sep 19, 19:06
Hatey McHateface on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “No shit, Sherlock, erm, Alf. Who’s this Ambassador Murray boy? I don’t waste my time on X.” Sep 19, 18:57
DaveL on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “The self proclaimed factchecker speaks! Who takes any notice of you? You claim at 4.22pm that ‘thousands’ of innocent civilians…” Sep 19, 18:54
TURABDIN on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “@FACTCHECKER, depends on how one might define «Scottish». Pedestrian anglo-unionist clones or a Scot with a functioning individuality. Blair &…” Sep 19, 18:54
Xaracen on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: ““In that time we have been hugely over-represented as leaders of the UK. Hardly a ‘subaltern people’.” WM decisions are…” Sep 19, 18:45
DaveL on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “…but we keep being told by the MSM and you (wee Adolf AKA Hatey) that the Rus are losing the…” Sep 19, 18:37
Dan on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “Massively wealthy UK “businessman” and tax resident in Monaco who lays off loads of folk from companies he is involved…” Sep 19, 18:03
factchecker on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “In the last 30 years, on a population basis Scotland should have had a Prime Minister for 3 of them.…” Sep 19, 18:00
TURABDIN on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “assuming your post is not ironic, which i believe it might be, the current UK cabinet has one Scot in…” Sep 19, 17:29
TURABDIN on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “One cannot be too choosey about ones friends or you might end up with none. One may sup….with a long…” Sep 19, 17:10
agentx on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: ““Subaltern peoples” refers to social groups, classes, or populations who are structurally excluded, marginalised, and denied a voice or agency…” Sep 19, 16:53
robertkknight on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “Herman Munster couldn’t find Scotland on a map if his next hit of amyl nitrite depended upon it. The Celtic…” Sep 19, 16:45
factchecker on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “Our resident professor comments approvingly “In response to the Celtic nations meeting, Lavrov stated explicitly that Ru**ia supports Scotland’s right…” Sep 19, 16:22
TURABDIN on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “@Alf Baird Trying to avoid moderation traps…so here goes sans triggers…. Edward Said was a singular man. I should have…” Sep 19, 16:16
TURABDIN on A Thousand Islands In The Sea: “I do not associate Trump or his MAGA foreign policy, or deals as he calls his «ploys», with nuance. The…” Sep 19, 16:02