Here’s Ed Miliband, giving a speech this morning to literally at least 20 Labour MPs, Labour MSPs, journalists and possibly a stray member of the public who accidentally walked through the wrong door in Clydebank, a place where Labour leaders used to address gatherings of thousands.
Unusually, Miliband took a few questions from the hacks, all of whom promptly wasted the opportunity by lobbing completely pointless softballs about coalitions and deals, all of which (a) have been asked a hundred times already, (b) were rendered moot by Alex Salmond on the Marr show yesterday, and (c) were only ever going to be batted away non-committally.
So here’s an actually worthwhile one they can ask instead next time.
We have to give Jim Murphy credit – on this week’s Sunday Politics he started off with the subtle, misleading but technically-accurate version of Labour’s line about the “biggest party forming the government”, which involves making the true but irrelevant observation that in the past it’s usually been the case. (Mainly because UK elections almost always give the biggest party a comfortable majority.)
But it only took a couple of minutes of questioning for the Scottish branch manager to lose his cool and resort to the comprehensively debunked flat-out lie again.
We thought you’d enjoy this clip from this morning’s Andrew Marr Show, readers. It came after a very sensible interview, in which Salmond had calmly and reasonably laid out the SNP’s view on events should there be a hung parliament this May with the former First Minister’s party holding the balance of power.
Tory minister Anna Soubry seems to be experiencing a degree of regret about having begged Scots to stay in the UK. The body language says as much as the words.
The Daily Record, still smarting from the humiliation of being forced to very quietly admit it told its readers a £20 billion lie about the Smith Commission late last year, has been in a demented overdrive trying to provoke Yes/SNP supporters this week.
It started on Tuesday with an echo of the paper’s infamous “Vow” cover, clearly aimed at winding up its detractors but which passed without much comment as social media users merely raised a brief weary eyebrow and got on with their day. But then the Record started turning up the volume.
Sometimes the UK media is so soul-crushingly moronic, readers, that it’s hard to get out of bed in the morning. Nevertheless, we’re pretty sure we haven’t nodded off and woken up in 2017, so today’s papers must be even more idiotic than usual.
Northcode on Sicknote Slippers: “*Do yous want tae march? Apparently 99% of actual, real and genuine liberty seeking, independence supporting Scots didn’t want to……” Mar 30, 11:47
Stevie on Sicknote Slippers: “I thought last year that REFORM would bevcome the official opposition and I still think that. Why would anyone who…” Mar 30, 11:47
Captain Caveman on Protest But Don’t Survive: “… So who, pray, are you giving your hard fought and hard won vote for, Northie? Or – don’t tell…” Mar 30, 11:20
100%Yes on Sicknote Slippers: “If you weren’t convinced the SNP didn’t won’t Independence you will now, “FRIST Minister John Swinney will push the UK…” Mar 30, 10:53
100%Yes on Sicknote Slippers: “In a Independent Scotland we shouldn’t pay pension pots of these individuals who have made a carer out of the…” Mar 30, 10:23
Northcode on Protest But Don’t Survive: “Saturday’s “We Believe in Scotland… but only as a region of England” march was bad for the SNP, bad for…” Mar 30, 10:08
Willie on Sicknote Slippers: “A Lordship in waiting he hopes is Me Peter Wishart. And where else would one be than in London over…” Mar 30, 10:04
Northcode on Protest But Don’t Survive: “Even the acting talent that is the world famous Brian Cox (albeit he was working with a poor script) could…” Mar 30, 09:24
Jamie on Sicknote Slippers: “Read the roll of honour, Scotland’s bravest men…” Mar 30, 07:47
Cynicus on Sicknote Slippers: “Rev, your link to “a pretty openly anti-Semitic protest “ shows nothing of the kind. It is to a Twitter…” Mar 30, 02:21
Young Lochinvar on Sicknote Slippers: “Meant to conclude: Signed: Your angry and defrauded long term true independence voter base..” Mar 30, 01:12
Young Lochinvar on Protest But Don’t Survive: “Yup.. You know what grips me; these testimonial interviews? What about his rank failures in post on transport (ultimately passed…” Mar 30, 01:06
Young Lochinvar on Sicknote Slippers: “Absolutely Geri, but also Dhondt (Westminsters git) as well! The non-achieving political and Quango class parasites are everywhere, and, I…” Mar 30, 00:51
Geri on Sicknote Slippers: “Aye, “Trust in Nicola” I’m still waiting on this grand plan she was supposedly working on in the background. Whit…” Mar 29, 23:26
100%Yes on Sicknote Slippers: “Well done to Fiona for her tweet it must have taken this coward hours to reply with a correct response.…” Mar 29, 23:07
Mark Beggan on Sicknote Slippers: “Fat Pete has joined the elite. and the far right he will defeat. All his career he’s been on the…” Mar 29, 23:05
100%Yes on Sicknote Slippers: “To be honest Farage can be PM for all I care and certainly couldn’t give a flying F*cking if he…” Mar 29, 23:01
100%Yes on Sicknote Slippers: “His only regret is he was never elected to be speaker of the house of commons. Your not a rich…” Mar 29, 22:49
Dan on Protest But Don’t Survive: “It’s been fairly obvious to most informed folk that the NuSNP are the problem with regard to progressing Scotland’s return…” Mar 29, 22:41
Davie on Sicknote Slippers: “Farage will not be the nest Prime Minister. He is a charlatan, a rehashed Tory and establishment containment. Like them…” Mar 29, 21:15
TURABDIN on Sicknote Slippers: “Hey, mr Wishy Washy, the «far right» within the rotting BritState is a peculiarly English problem, let them deal with…” Mar 29, 20:01
Geri on Protest But Don’t Survive: “Why don’t you tell the group what socialism is? I’m sure we’d all love to read yer take on how…” Mar 29, 20:00
robertkknight on Sicknote Slippers: ““The creatures outside looked from pig to man, and from man to pig, and from pig to man again; but…” Mar 29, 19:53
H Scott on Sicknote Slippers: “The far right were on the Royal Mile haranguing the indy march. Peter Wishart could have killed two birds with…” Mar 29, 19:50
James on Sicknote Slippers: “Wait…Pishfart is one of the SNP UK agents who are ‘Lords-in-waiting’, but “…a pretty openly anti-Semitic protest..” Really? Seen any…” Mar 29, 19:41
Young Lochinvar on Sicknote Slippers: “Wet P1shfart is a bad parody of himself..” Mar 29, 19:19
Sven on Sicknote Slippers: ““When they call the roll in the Senate, the Senators do not know whether to call “Present” or “Not Guilty”.…” Mar 29, 19:15
sarah on Protest But Don’t Survive: “Well, all the sensible ones! And despite the obvious exceptions, most are sensible, nice people. 🙂” Mar 29, 19:03
