When I was a boy at Balbardie Primary School in Bathgate in the mid-70s, football was banned in the playground. Of course we were all fitba-daft laddies, so we sought ways around the prohibition. Occasionally someone would bring in a tennis ball, but those were difficult to control in school shoes and also apt to fly over the wall of the outdoor toilet block if somebody caught one sweetly on the volley.
So most playtimes somebody would produce a tin of Pepsi or Irn-Bru or Cresta, chug the contents, stand the empty container on its end and stomp sharply on it, producing something more akin to an ice-hockey puck that would serve for our kickabout.
But even after being skelped and scudded around a concrete playground into stone walls for 20 minutes, that can was still in better shape at the end of our game than the one the SNP have been kicking down the road since 2016.
The SNP now seem to be involved in some sort of competition where they dare each other to come up with the most blatant insult to their own members and/or the wider independence movement and see just how much they can get people to put up with.
First up was this drivel:
Humza Yousaf is leader of the SNP, a political party whose defining purpose – arguably its SOLE real purpose – is the pursuit of Scottish independence, but his “vision for Scotland” didn’t include a single mention of it.
Instead, Yousaf intends to spend the next three years on “equality”, “opportunity” and “community”, three meaningless buzzwords which every political party on Earth would claim to be in favour of. He might as well have identified his key values as kittens, lollipops and hugs.
Once again, we’re dismayed to report that we called it right. Because last night SNP MSP Mairi McAllan, officially representing the party on Question Time, told a weary audience in Fort William that that was precisely the case.
And readers, if ever a policy has been tested in battle and found wanting, it’s that one.
But we’ve subsequently noticed a number of attempts by various people to muddy the story by talking about a “draft” warrant request, implying that there was no improper delay. So we checked up, and thought you might like to know how the process works.
Gordy on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “Does oor Willie still have a boaby or has he transitioned to oor Wilhemina .” Aug 4, 22:06
Young Lochinvar on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “Happy anniversary tomorrow of the battle of Otterburn: 1388. I’d be prepared to suggest that few if any of our…” Aug 4, 21:28
Young Lochinvar on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “Good point MB. However, perhaps that’s because they were around longer and haven’t flagrantly nicked other peoples history and heroes…” Aug 4, 21:11
Mark Beggan on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “It’s interesting that all the other nations in the union have abundant mythology of their own.” Aug 4, 20:49
Young Lochinvar on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “An interesting post. I believe service in the trenches was also another traumatising influence in what he wrote.” Aug 4, 19:00
Young Lochinvar on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “For those who don’t know her, she is the one with a nose like Judge Alvin Valkenheiser in (aptly here)…” Aug 4, 18:44
George Ferguson on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “Current polling SNP 54 MSPs Scottish Greens 16 MSPS. A new Bute House Agreement coming up. Kate Forbes couldn’t survive…” Aug 4, 18:27
Andrew scott on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “Me thinks wee katie foresees Flynn taking over Snp Yeaugh” Aug 4, 18:22
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “Just bought a copy of The Hobbit in Gaelic, newly translated by Moray Watson. Also available in Irish, Welsh, Cornish,…” Aug 4, 17:48
James on The Empty Hearse: “Do you shower pick up a lieu day for working the day? Oh, of course you’ll get the English holidays…” Aug 4, 17:36
Iain More on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “So Kate Forbes is resigning from Holyrood next May. It is another sure sign that the SNP is heading for…” Aug 4, 17:30
Mark Beggan on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “If the female energy commonly known as Dickola the Dickless is holding the reins. Then she’s s holding the reins…” Aug 4, 17:08
Dan on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “Smiling like a Cheshire cat at the leadership announcement is not the coupon normally displayed by someone that’s missed out…” Aug 4, 17:03
Dan on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “She was likely only in the leadership “race” to take votes away from Ash Regan.” Aug 4, 16:56
Hatey McHateface on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “So a lemon crispy seagull then, if I correctly understood Dan’s post of yesterday. Incidentally, Lemon Duck is also a…” Aug 4, 16:54
Andy Ellis on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “I suspect “Dumb, Dumber and Dumberer” adequately covers it Sven. Proof if any were needed of the paucity of Scottish…” Aug 4, 16:49
Mark Beggan on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “That would never happen. If an ‘ilegal’ made your food and an ‘ilegal’ delivered your food on an illegal E-bike.…” Aug 4, 16:36
Mark Beggan on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “Yes you are correct. Nogbad the Bad. Another disgusting individual on the make. That’s the Left Wing and the Right…” Aug 4, 16:26
Young Lochinvar on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “I sense the path to the top is being cleared for (uber Sturgeonista) Mairi McAllan.. Wonder if the local bookies…” Aug 4, 16:22
Hatey McHateface on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “Minimum wage rises. NI rises. Then there’s the extra Scottish income tax brought in by (checks notes) Forbes’ SNP government.…” Aug 4, 16:07
Hatey McHateface on Scotland’s Saviour: “Fa’s Palestine then? I cannae find it oan ony map. Is it some kind o’ subterranean place? 🙂” Aug 4, 16:00
Sven on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “Mark Beggan @ 14.31. Bearing in mind Ms Forbes is a committed supporter of Freeports who was unable to register…” Aug 4, 15:26
KITTYBEE on Scotland’s Saviour: “Corbyn hasn’t got a discriminatory bone in his body.!!! Hate seeing genocide in Palestine? ANTISEMITISM!!!” Aug 4, 15:06
Sven on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “twathater @ 13.59. Whilst it is fine for career politicians to treat the voters who afforded them their well paid…” Aug 4, 14:35
Cynicus on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “So, did Murrell do her a favour when he rigged the election against her?” Aug 4, 14:15
twathater on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “So it now appears that ANY disagreement you have with any politician could be construed as abusive, especially if they…” Aug 4, 13:59
TURABDIN on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “KATE FORBES QUITTING….may that be the first of many in the faux nat. «nomenklatura»” Aug 4, 13:57
Mark Beggan on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “Three years after the child is born Noggin the Nog decides it’s time to be Mummy. Forbes is doing runner!…” Aug 4, 13:54
TURABDIN on The Deafening Echo Of Nothing: “OBSERVATIONS FROM THE UK CAPITAL. https://www.spiked-online.com/2025/08/02/london-a-city-of-strangers/ Things can only get …..” Aug 4, 13:42
