David Davis may be the last of his kind – a libertarian Tory from a council-scheme and grammar-school background, and also one of the few remaining big beasts occupying the political jungle of the back benches.
(He could in fact have been Tory leader, and would have been if David Cameron and George Osborne hadn’t teamed up to defeat him in 2005 after he won the first ballot.)
So on the rare occasions when he leads a Commons adjournment debate, as he did last Thursday evening, those with an educated eye for politics sit up and take notice.
In any functional nation, Friday’s revelations in Parliament by Sir David Davis would have been headline news. An extremely powerful figure, the then-First Minister’s chief of staff, was named and accused of conspiring with the Scottish Government, civil service and media to imprison an innocent man – the former leader of the country – on very serious charges of sexual assault, and of seeking to destroy his reputation by illegally leaking the false allegations to the press.
Liz Lloyd had never been publicly named as the suspect before that moment, so it was almost immeasurably bizarre that only two of Scotland’s newspapers (and two of its lowest-selling), namely The Times and – belatedly – The National, bothered to even report the accusation, far less spend any time seriously delving into it.
But it still wasn’t as odd as THIS response from a former Green MSP.
What on Earth is being suggested here? Let’s try to find out.
It’s both a comprehensive refresher of events surrounding the Scottish Government’s conspiracy to convict Alex Salmond on false charges, and a sharp reminder of why Scotland is, in truth, not yet a country in a fit administrative state for independence.
But one part in particular ought to be the headline news tonight.
Independence is dead as a political issue in Scotland for the next few years. This much should not be in any dispute. A Labour government with a crushing majority sits firmly in Westminster with absolutely no intentions of granting a second referendum, and the SNP has loudly and clearly abandoned any other strategy.
This fact is understandably painful and difficult to come to terms with for anyone who’s devoted the last 13 years (or more) to pursuing that cause and now isn’t quite sure what to do with theirself. But for those who still aren’t ready to face up to the unpleasant reality, there’s always the comforting world of fantasy.
Because there’s always money to be made from snake oil and pie in the sky.
The average rape sentence in Scotland is seven years, so to get six years plus three years’ supervision for the technically lesser crime of sexual assaults means they must have been pretty grim ones.
So we know that Cameron Downing is a very bad man. Which does rather invite the question of why he was so popular in the SNP.
The SNP have been pretty clear about the reason they think they got a battering in last week’s election: it was because people were voting to kick out the Tories.
Now, that’s obviously nonsense. There were almost no Tories in Scotland to start with – just 10% of voters had a Tory MP – and only one of the six actually lost his seat. (Which was entirely down to the ham-fisted interference of Douglas Ross rather than an SNP surge – the SNP’s vote share in the seat in question went DOWN.)
If you wanted to keep Tories out in Scotland all you had to do was keep voting for your current MP, most of whom were SNP, rather than risk splitting the anti-Tory vote by switching to Labour and risk letting the Tories squeeze through in the middle. (Which would have happened in many seats had the Tories’ own vote not collapsed.)
But if it was true that the SNP lost because the electorate thought the election was about getting rid of the Tories, whose fault was that?
To be honest, folks, we’re not quite sure what to do with ourselves at the moment.
Everyone and his wee dug is writing election-aftermath columns and offering the SNP advice of varying intelligence and solemnity about how to recover from the shattering blow they’ve just been dealt by Scottish voters.
But it’s a pointless exercise. They may as well be yelling down a manhole.
The Scottish Greens, in a feat of remarkable hubris and financial profligacy, stood 44 candidates in this week’s general election, knowing that most of them would lose their deposits, which they duly did.
But not quite all of them. And there the comedy arose.
Because while SNP boneheads on social media are raging idiotically at Alba, Wings and others for causing division and damaging the unity of the indy cause yada yada yada, a small handful of Green candidates made a real difference.
Bilbo on Steadying The Ship: “There has been article upon article about a £5 billion deficit over the course of next Holyrood parliament. There is…” May 15, 20:01
Mark Beggan on Steadying The Ship: “Joke Time! When is a resignation Not a resignation? When it’s a Wessignation!” May 15, 19:18
Aidan on The Broken Rainbow: ““ The UK is an English criminal enterprise run by the English establishment for the English establishment. That is the…” May 15, 19:18
Mark Beggan on Steadying The Ship: “You can take oor freedom but you’ll never take oor benefits!!” May 15, 19:12
Xaracen on The Broken Rainbow: “Nothing in your response to me is relevant, Hatey. As ever, you carefully ignored the point. You changed the subject…” May 15, 18:54
Blackhack on Steadying The Ship: “Probably better with the Benny Hill tune” May 15, 18:22
Mark Beggan on Steadying The Ship: “The Dance of the Cuckoos is the tune you’re looking for. What about ‘The Band Played On’ would be more…” May 15, 17:20
Effijy on Steadying The Ship: “Yes, no one in sight has the skills of Alex Salmond but do we wish Swinney to be replaced by…” May 15, 17:11
Colin Alexander on Steadying The Ship: “The Dance Of The Cuckoos is Laurel and Hardy’s theme tune.” May 15, 17:11
Dan on Steadying The Ship: “FFS, are you enjoying a holiday in the Southern Hemisphere or doing a headstand? Because that’s about the only way…” May 15, 17:00
agentx on Steadying The Ship: “But there has just been an election where the SNP lost seats and had fewer votes!” May 15, 17:00
Izzie on Steadying The Ship: “Two by-elections next month should perhaps show whether the SNP is, as I suspect, on the up.” May 15, 16:33
100%Yes on Steadying The Ship: “I don’t know about anyone else but can you imagine JS running a country what a freighting thought, thank god…” May 15, 16:21
Hatey McHateface on Steadying The Ship: “The band should start rehearsing. Does the Laurel & Hardy theme have a name, other than the “Laurel & Hardy…” May 15, 16:14
Mark Beggan on Steadying The Ship: “‘Nearer my God to me’. Was the tune the the band played as the Titanic was sinking.” May 15, 16:00
Mark Beggan on Steadying The Ship: “The Captain always goes down with the ship.” May 15, 15:56
Mark Beggan on The Broken Rainbow: “Satisfying because it’s the Last Waltz for radical lunatics. Time to pay the Tillerman.” May 15, 15:48
Knuckle_heid on Steadying The Ship: “Swinney definitely isn’t Salmond! With a collapsing vote like that, they should exit stage left at the next HR election…” May 15, 15:37
Hatey McHateface on The Broken Rainbow: “Not seeing that at all, Lorncal. Scotland is just as much a group of regions as England is. The Borders,…” May 15, 15:05
Hatey McHateface on The Broken Rainbow: “It’s not the miners being consigned to the scrapheap this time – it’s the oil and gas workers. It’s not…” May 15, 14:58
Aidan on The Broken Rainbow: ““ A study that involved two Universities, accepted by the electoral commission, Lord Ashcroft polling & the Scottish Referendum study…” May 15, 14:35
Hatey McHateface on The Broken Rainbow: “@ Northcode says: 15 May, 2026 at 11:36 am “I’m calling it, Geri” Crivens, Northy. I do hope that comma…” May 15, 14:27
Hatey McHateface on The Broken Rainbow: “Fine, Alf. I asked you to clarify a fairly straightforwards situation. You decided to evade the question, as per usual.…” May 15, 14:20
Hatey McHateface on The Broken Rainbow: “Here you go, Geri: “Instead of futilely repeating the pointless point scoring of the past 5 years, you really should…” May 15, 14:11
Geri on The Broken Rainbow: “Scots voted Yes in 2014, dip shit. A study that involved two Universities, accepted by the electoral commission, Lord Ashcroft…” May 15, 13:38
Young Lochinvar on The Broken Rainbow: “Andy Burnham; King orf ooop Norf, future former failed PM to give him his full title.” May 15, 12:35
Ross on The Broken Rainbow: “Link to the latest poll,campebll? The latest I see is from the Sunday Times and os a Yes majority?” May 15, 12:35
Mark Beggan on The Broken Rainbow: “Deja vu! It’s the 1970’s all over again. Dirty Filthy Labour meltdown and the Death Cult in the East cutting…” May 15, 12:34
Alf Baird on The Broken Rainbow: “Even Churchill warned that the west including imperial England would ultimately abandon the Z******s if they continued with their N*z*…” May 15, 12:25
Alf Baird on The Broken Rainbow: “Fowk canna ser twa maisters, like some o oor MSP’s mak-believe, Hatey. Fowk canna plicht lealtie tae twa soveranes. For…” May 15, 12:14