This was Scottish Tory uberdunce Jamie Greene a few weeks ago, bitterly attacking the SNP for spending £22,000 on consulting the public over a policy on which the party won a landslide victory in the 2016 Holyrood election.
You might think that a government pursuing the manifesto policies it was elected on was a pretty legitimate thing to do, especially when it was asking voters for their views in order to shape that policy. Perhaps Greene was confused because the Tories have been acting as if they, not the SNP, won the election. But that raises another question.
Earlier today we reported on the mysterious failure of the Herald to notice that its front page lead story about supposedly poor ScotRail punctuality figures made a number of serious errors with regard to the facts, most notably confusing the excellent figures for last month with a 12-month rolling average which was significantly worse.
But as we read the rest of the papers, we noticed the oddest thing.
Today’s Daily Record covers the story we mentioned yesterday about a report from a Scottish Labour campaign group making the pretty factually-uncontestable point that the branch office’s dismal strategy in last month’s election held the UK party back.
We’ll be honest with you here, readers – even though it’s only July, when it comes to sheer ham-fisted, tin-eared, clown-shoed, foot-shooting idiocy we didn’t think anything in Scottish politics in 2017 could possibly top the SNP’s decision that the surefire way to win back voters after a poor election result was literally mutilating puppies.
After all, that’s the sort of thing you say as a self-evidently ludicrous and hyperbolic joke: “Ha ha, the SNP are so dominant in Scotland these days that the only way they could lose an election would be if Nicola Sturgeon went on telly and started hacking the tails off week-old puppy-dogs without anaesthetic! LOL!!!!!”
It couldn’t even be defended as a grotesque but cynically cunning attempt to win votes from the rural hunting-and-fishing lobby – they did it right AFTER the election, when all those people had just gone out and voted Tory anyway.
But bless their hearts, Scottish Labour never once saw a low bar that they didn’t try to slither under, and today they pulled off the seemingly impossible.
We’re still on holiday, because five years of stuff like this ruins your soul:
Let’s look at the logic of that closely for just one minute, and then we’re going to go back to smashing our head off a brick wall to try to make the stupid go away.
Brexit is already a shambles. Everyone south of Manchester is unhappy because it’s too suffocatingly hot to move, and everyone north of Manchester is unhappy because they’ve not got the sunshine. We could all, for various reasons, do with a chuckle.
So without further ado, readers, enjoy the “clueless metropolitan hacksplaining” hit of the summer: Kezia Dugdale, Comeback Queen.
She’d insisted explicitly several times that a Jeremy Corbyn administration WOULD block a new indyref, even after being shown a video clip of Corbyn from earlier in the day saying he wouldn’t, and she repeatedly urged readers not to listen to the party’s leader and to instead go and look at the Labour manifesto.
James Che on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “Question, At what date did Englands Great Britain parliament End, ? It was dissolved in 1800.” Mar 25, 07:44
James Che on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “Question, What date did the Great Britain parliament dissolve Scotlands parliament from the Great Britain parliament? 1707.” Mar 25, 07:40
James Che on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “Question, At what date did Scotland make a 1707 treaty with the United kingdom parliament? It holds nor made no…” Mar 25, 07:36
James Che on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “Question, At what date does anyone here find Scotland attached to The Great Britain parliament in any legal or official…” Mar 25, 07:32
Geri on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: ““…demand the implementation of devolution for The Kingdom of England, and stop the KoE treating the UK Parliament in Westminster…” Mar 25, 07:25
Aidan on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “@Dan there isn’t an option to renounce the benefits (which for most working people on an average wage or above…” Mar 25, 07:19
Breastplate on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “Alan, you may think you’re a Unionist but there is no Union, just a parasitic England sacking the lifeblood from…” Mar 25, 00:02
Cynicus on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “No idea who this guy is – or what you’re talking about. Are you sure you are posting in the…” Mar 24, 23:53
Dan on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “@alan scott “When are you unionists going to” demand the implementation of devolution for The Kingdom of England, and stop…” Mar 24, 22:46
Cherrybank on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “Sarah @ 8.15pm Jim Sillars published his final book on November 2025 titled ‘The New Case for Optimism ‘ costing…” Mar 24, 22:33
sarah on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “Ask a French person when they will give up their nationhood. Or a German. Or the c. 200 other countries…” Mar 24, 22:22
agentx on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: ““When are you Nationalists going to say enough is enough and demand the abolition of Holyrood and the end to…” Mar 24, 22:18
Iain More on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “I am told that the UK owns c £700 Billion of Yankee NAZI Debt. We are ruled by Brit/Sassanach FUCKWITS…” Mar 24, 21:57
alan scott on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “I’m a Unionist who thinks Holyrood should be abolished. The cost of one election is peanuts compared to the cost…” Mar 24, 21:53
Alf Baird on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: ““the Scot heads to oblivion in his own land” This is indeed what postcolonial theory tells us, that a colonized…” Mar 24, 21:24
sarah on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “Nae Need, can we take some comfort from Jim Sillars’ speech at Oran Mor recently? Jim said it had been…” Mar 24, 20:15
Northcode on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “On the bright side – once Scotland has been coloniZed to the maximum extent and her people and their culture…” Mar 24, 19:53
Nae Need! on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “I’ve spent ages writing a post on here and then editing and then deleting it. Tongue tied, all fingers and…” Mar 24, 19:04
Young Lochinvar on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “NC 7 reported “new towns” in Merry ol’ Engerlund is where the money will go..” Mar 24, 17:55
Willie on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “The Scots Parliament has turned out to be exactly what Westminster wanted of it. Westminster never intended to be anything…” Mar 24, 17:24
Andy Storrie on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “The professionally superior spectre of wee Jim Kelly looms larger and larger over this site with every passing day, Campbell.…” Mar 24, 17:10
Cherrybank on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “I think Craig Houston the You Tuber representing the SDP will be a surprise winner of a seat on the…” Mar 24, 15:42
Rob on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “The de Hondt system is skewed to stop having a majority but essentially if enough folk wanted the SNP out…” Mar 24, 15:29
100%Yes on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “I’d say John Swinney couldn’t turn a car around never mind the Country. The man is so unappealing I wish…” Mar 24, 14:58
100%Yes on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: “New poll predicts a 18 Pro-Indy majority lead for May’s election, so what? The parliament has had a Pro-Indy majority…” Mar 24, 14:46
Northcode on Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off: ““So what will we get for this £53m?” A cheap, and not very entertaining, second-rate circus laid on by Westminster…” Mar 24, 14:42
