I was going to write this article yesterday, but 2024’s miserable damp squib of a summer unexpectedly delivered a beautiful day – a perfect 20C of unbroken sunshine with a refreshing slight breeze – so I went for a nice walk instead.
Rather than my usual bird-feeding and bear-patrolling beat along the river and canal, I headed off on what used to be my standard summer stroll: up the long steep hill to Beckford’s Tower and its associated cemetery with stunning views over the city.
I’ll scatter a few pics from the walk throughout this feature, as otherwise I’m afraid it’s going to be a bit depressing and angering.
There are now just 10 days until the general election. Wings has never told its readers how to vote and we’re not going to start now. Which is lucky, because if we were, we wouldn’t have a clue how to.
Just, y’know, not for any of these wretched, worthless shiters.
When you’ve been watching Scotland playing football for 50 years of your life, you become accustomed to disappointment. You expect disappointment. Anything better than disappointment becomes a bonus.
Having solved cat hunger in Greece, the tireless Holiday Boy has now turned his hand to addressing Scotland’s crippling golfing shortage, so we’ve got a different sort of cartoon again for you this weekend.
The clip below is from a 1981 arcade videogame called Venture, by Exidy, in which you play a cheerful character called Winky on a mission to loot treasure from a series of monster-infested dungeons.
For the purposes of this article the treasure in the room above, which takes the form of a castle tower, represents Scottish politics. The room itself is the Union.
The SNP released their general election manifesto today. We’re not going to link you to it, because we don’t want to be responsible for wasting your time. This is everything it has to say on the party’s (cough) strategy for achieving independence.
It deserves much, much less respect than we’re giving it. Tomorrow, ice lolly reviews.
We’re still trying not to pay attention to the election because it’s so tedious and awful and pointless, but this is worth putting on the record because it’s in The National and otherwise nobody’s going to read it.
Holiday Boy has of course chosen the general election campaign to spend the next three weeks feeding stray cats somewhere sunny, so here’s a cartoon by the brilliant webcomicname that summarises the Baillie Gifford story for anyone joining us late.
January 2018, with no general election due for four and a half years: “I very rarely talk about Scottish independence in the chamber, because I talk about things that matter”
June 2024, with an election in four weeks and a £91,346 salary, expenses and pension at stake: “ROBERT THE BRUCE! BANNOCKBURN! DECLARATION OF ARBROATH! FLOWER OF SCOTLAND! FREEEEEEEEEDOOOOOOMMMM!”
Alf Baird on Faces In Sand: ““..dismantle a political and economic union that he claims doesn’t exist” The problem surely lies with those such as yersel…” Oct 25, 22:36
sarah on Faces In Sand: “Dan, thanks for the info on trees. I brought the chestnut tree up from Kent as a sprout 25 years…” Oct 25, 21:56
Lorncal on Faces In Sand: “I absolutely agree, Northcode, that we need to make a powerful case for independence across the board, but, after an…” Oct 25, 20:52
Dan on Faces In Sand: “@ Sarah They are not my Hazel or Sweet Chestnut trees. They are just planted locally along a roadside. I’m…” Oct 25, 20:31
sam on Faces In Sand: “That there was colonialism of Northern Ireland was an idea widely considered by many groups and individuals during what is…” Oct 25, 20:12
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: “Wheesht, Xaracen! Dinna tell the Picts we Scots stole most of the country from. Got to say, it does seem…” Oct 25, 19:44
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: “My benchmark 30 seconds of internet research reveals the budget of BBC Scotland TV to be £42 million PA. The…” Oct 25, 19:36
Insider on Faces In Sand: “sarah @7:13 This is solely due to the vicious, heartless colonialism that we Scots suffer under. But never fear…in Alf’s…” Oct 25, 19:33
Xaracen on Faces In Sand: ““Ex Injuria Jus Non Oritur” -Illegitimacy cannot create legitimacy. A wrongful act cannot become a lawful one through time alone.…” Oct 25, 19:21
sarah on Faces In Sand: “Dan, how come your hazel nuts actually contain nuts? I gathered some off the ground a few days ago and…” Oct 25, 19:13
Dan on Faces In Sand: “Link to Barrheadboy article (and comments) posted today which shines some light on influencing aspects that are factors in shaping…” Oct 25, 18:32
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: “Maybe 1606 and 1707 are times, not dates? Then it makes sense.” Oct 25, 18:27
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: “Mental impairment is a badge of honour these days. It brings loads of societal advantages too, not to mention free…” Oct 25, 18:23
Captain Caveman on Faces In Sand: “Well, this “sassenach yoon” cage is indeed freely rattling, I will readily concede. Rattling with wry, incredulous laughter. 😀” Oct 25, 18:22
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: “Quite difficult to see how any sane, rational person can be opposed to rewilding per se. So I guess Confused’s…” Oct 25, 18:00
Spartan 117 on Faces In Sand: “You do know all the estates up here are owned either by Arabs (their 737s arrive at Inverness regularly, one…” Oct 25, 17:49
Dan on Faces In Sand: “Not stuck indoors for me today. Yesterday was mostly indoors though sitting out the gales and rain after spending the…” Oct 25, 17:45
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: “““authoritarian logic” as you call it by implication emanates from oppressive state entities and its mouthpieces (i.e. you Northcode), not…” Oct 25, 17:44
Spartan 117 on Faces In Sand: “I see I’m not the only one who raised an eyebrow at The Nutty Professor’s bizarre posts above. Well said…” Oct 25, 17:44
sam on Faces In Sand: “Northcode says of Alf Baird: He then implies that Scots who disagree with his “Scotland is colonised” argument are mentally…” Oct 25, 17:26
Dan on Faces In Sand: “So Northcode, were does the likes of Plato and his Allegory of the Cave fit in with your junk and…” Oct 25, 17:24
Confused on Faces In Sand: “this weather, eh? – thank god for the aga, warms the whole house, cooks your dinner and dries out your…” Oct 25, 16:38
Alf Baird on Faces In Sand: “On the contrary, “authoritarian logic” as you call it by implication emanates from oppressive state entities and its mouthpieces (i.e.…” Oct 25, 16:11
sarah on Faces In Sand: “Since we’re all stuck indoors, there’s some crowdfunders to donate to, and youtube from SSRG conference to listen to. 1.…” Oct 25, 14:46
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: ““This isn’t metaphor – it’s literal pathologisation” Good post, Northy. Alf’s attitude is straight out of the Bolshevik handbook as…” Oct 25, 14:43
Northcode on Faces In Sand: “Alf Baird is claiming exclusive access to “reality”. He writes: “The unveiled reality enabling the colonized mind to recover…” This…” Oct 25, 14:17
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: ““Scotland requires authentic statesmen more than parish pump politicians” You say that, TURABDIN, yet the decades come and the decades…” Oct 25, 14:14
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: ““It’s the sheer indefatigability and lack of self-awareness that shocks you” It’s of fascinating academic interest, certainly. I’m of the…” Oct 25, 14:01
TURABDIN on Faces In Sand: “MODERN COLONIALISM IN ACTION https://venezuelanalysis.com/opinion/venezuela-from-revolution-to-recolonization/ USA, the country that supported Saddam Hussein in a proxy war against its neighbour then…” Oct 25, 13:51
Hatey McHateface on Faces In Sand: ““reminds me of the evil Nanny from the Omen with that glaikit satanic glare she has” Ah, the wondrous wittering…” Oct 25, 13:39
