Everyone’s having a lot of fun with the farcical Hate Crime Act that will finally come into operation in Scotland in just a couple of weeks’ time, fittingly on April Fools’ Day.
There’s a Calvin And Hobbes cartoon we like to post on social media when someone’s got themselves in such a pickle that they’re just flailing around desperately firing off every slogan, argument or insult they can think of to get themselves out of it.
Many things about the session are disturbing, not least the incredibly one-sided nature of both the witnesses and the committee, none of whom seem to have even a token interest in challenging the claims of the witnesses, however absurd or contentious (eg that praying for someone is basically a form of torture).
The Scottish Government have just launched yet another nanny-state “healthy eating” intervention, and to be honest, readers, the cheap-shot open goals just queued up.
Our first instinct was to do a simple picture gallery of some of the insatiable pie-hounds squeezing their expenses-fed backsides onto the groaning, creaking benches and chairs of the Holyrood and Westminster parliaments, such as Kirsten “Elbows” Oswald (pictured above, slumped back under the sheer weight of her neck) – so known to other MPs because you get between her and a buffet at grave peril to your ribcage.
(And no, we’re not telling you which ones told us that.)
More than three months have passed since Alex Salmond launched a lawsuit against the Scottish Government for its grotesquely botched handling of false allegations of sexual misconduct against him.
With Scottish politics currently in a completely moribund state, as the party of government disintegrates shambolically and the main opposition party keeps its mouth shut and its head down in an attempt to not destroy its newfound and extremely fragile status as a credible alternative, one might imagine that the political media would be desperate for the case to get under way and provide them with some juicy content.
So it’s slightly surprising that none of them has noticed the latest development.
We’re reluctant to even mention the farcical, embarrassing goings-on in the House Of Commons last night, but the very short version is that the SNP somehow contrived to save Keir Starmer from an embarrassing mass rebellion of Labour MPs.
And in so far as anyone cared about them at all, the people of Gaza were the losers.
As the long-running police probe into SNP finances continues, Wings received some slightly surprising news today in the form of an FOI response.
Based on reports from various trustworthy sources we’d expected to hear that the police side of the investigation was by this point winding down somewhat, with most matters of fact already established, detectives assigned to other duties and the ball now largely in the court of the Crown Office and Procurator Fiscal Service (COPFS).
Because we’re still more than two years out from the next Holyrood election, and it’s really hard to see how it’s going to pan out. So let’s throw some figures around.
This is so freaky I had to check they weren’t quoting each other. It’s like a game show.
Just a couple of nice well-brought-up Hutchesons’ Grammar boys in smart suits, there, thinking the same, speaking the same, saying the same, and angling for the same job. (Which one of them now has, and the other may have soon.)
Hatey McHateface on The Broken Rainbow: “@Geri Polling evidence is clear enough. If a Reform government offered us a referendum next week, a majority of Scots…” May 13, 23:08
Geri on The Hills Of Far Away: “SNP had various mandates. How do you know they vote for something else? An election isn’t a referendum. The Yes…” May 13, 23:06
Geri on The Broken Rainbow: “Reform wouldn’t offer Independence. They certainly wouldn’t deliver on it. They’d not let the UK cash cow just walk out…” May 13, 22:56
Hatey McHateface on The Hills Of Far Away: ““refused what we vote for” You’re refused what YOU vote for, Geri, because the majority of Scots vote for something…” May 13, 22:44
John on The Broken Rainbow: “well- the only way to fix it would be to “true” proportional representation, as in the German Bundestag. Problem with…” May 13, 22:14
100%Yes on The Broken Rainbow: “John Swinney will now sell Scotland for federalism make no mistake this is what’s going to happen. The SNP leadership…” May 13, 22:01
Geri on The Hills Of Far Away: “AI Dan “fluff”? Yer sounding more & more like Franchise Fanny by the day. You just can’t help yersel. As…” May 13, 21:45
Hatey McHateface on The Hills Of Far Away: “Havers, Northy, you’re confusing meaning with interpretation. The Egyptians, demonstrably the finest stone workers who have ever graced this planet…” May 13, 20:47
100%Yes on The Broken Rainbow: “Has anyone watch the mid week Scottish Prism, take a look. Already JS has backed track on what he said…” May 13, 19:47
Northcode on The Hills Of Far Away: “Rhetoric shapes meaning; a lie hollows it out. A lie is the crack in the stone not a carving… as…” May 13, 19:44
Hatey McHateface on The Broken Rainbow: “Good Lord, Northy! So even the Picts are now using the lying language of the coloniser – English.” May 13, 19:30
100%Yes on The Broken Rainbow: “This policy of kicking Indy into the long grass is now showing in the opinion polls for the SNP. There…” May 13, 19:29
Northcode on The Hills Of Far Away: ““… insults aren’t meant to arguments…” To be or not to be, but where is the ‘be’… I forgot to…” May 13, 19:28
Hatey McHateface on The Hills Of Far Away: “You omitted to say where bare-faced lying fits in, Northy.” May 13, 19:27
Northcode on The Broken Rainbow: “Colonialists in this place very often mistake disruption for cleverness and noise for wit, but “the stone knows the difference”,…” May 13, 19:18
Northcode on The Hills Of Far Away: ““Calling people “thick cants” isn’t an argument either.” Correct, but then again insults aren’t meant to arguments… not directly, anyway.…” May 13, 19:08
Hatey McHateface on The Hills Of Far Away: “Well, well. So the Falklands now has an outfit backed by a state with the determination, skill, technology and balls…” May 13, 18:48
Hatey McHateface on The Hills Of Far Away: “@Aidan There’s a war crimes tribunal in permanent session atween Geri’s lugs. In the interests of efficiency, she volunteered to…” May 13, 18:40
Hatey McHateface on The Broken Rainbow: “Lucky for Scotland that the boys petitioning the UN make all of this democratic voting malarkey a pointless sideshow. Beats…” May 13, 18:35
duncanio on The Broken Rainbow: “I didn’t say it was an alternative. I said it was imperfect but less imperfect than FPTP. Otherwise you would…” May 13, 18:31
Hatey McHateface on The Hills Of Far Away: ““Do you think have a special, unique entitlement to type insults” Does not compute. Re-type and re-submit.” May 13, 18:25
Hatey McHateface on The Hills Of Far Away: ““Calling something “horseshit” isn’t an argument” Hark at Northy! Only yesterday he was calling people “thick cants”. Ken fit sane,…” May 13, 18:19
Jay on The Hills Of Far Away: “Commander-in-Chief Caveman, I’ve no idea whether you will read this.. What is pretentious in my comment? I do not pretend,…” May 13, 18:17
Captain Caveman on The Hills Of Far Away: “@Aidan “Of course people living in a rich and prosperous country cosplaying as victims is one thing you missed from…” May 13, 17:38
Rev. Stuart Campbell on The Broken Rainbow: “Ever since 2016, the SNP’s policy has basically been to kick it down the road for two years at a…” May 13, 17:33
Rev. Stuart Campbell on The Broken Rainbow: “It made zero difference to the point anyway. But gah, too many numbers flying around at once.” May 13, 17:32
Rev. Stuart Campbell on The Broken Rainbow: “But that’s not the alternative. The alternative is a proportional system that actually works.” May 13, 17:32
Aidan on The Hills Of Far Away: “Of course people living in a rich and prosperous country cosplaying as victims is one thing you missed from your…” May 13, 17:29
Aidan on The Hills Of Far Away: “Had Blair been tried and found guilty of being a war criminal, or even indicted?” May 13, 17:14
Captain Caveman on The Hills Of Far Away: “Regardless of the whys and wherefores, Jay, one thing is certain: you’re a pretentious, obnoxious, insufferable wanker. 🙂 Yup. Deffo…” May 13, 17:10
