This week Scottish Labour quietly abandoned their “biggest party forms the government” election campaign after it was comprehensively debunked by this site and, belatedly, the mainstream media. An alert reader reminded us this evening of how the party wasn’t always so attached to the rules.
Because back in 2007, when Labour was neither the biggest party nor the incumbent administration, it had a damn good try at forming the government anyway.
All this year we’ve been noticing a curious re-writing of history in the Scottish and UK media. It’s spanned left-wing and right-wing press, and even Yes-friendly voices like Iain Macwhirter and the estimable Lallands Peat Worrier have been sucked in.
Yet it’s such a fundamentally bizarre misunderstanding of a political system that’s now been running in Scotland for 16 years that we’re bewildered at the way everyone’s suddenly decided that it happened.
The latest occurrence of this odd phenomenon was in yesterday’s Daily Record, and the subject is the newly-alleged “informal deal” between the minority SNP government of 2007-11 and the Scottish Conservatives.
The election of Jim Murphy as branch office leader has so far failed to produce a shift in the party’s catastrophic polling figures north of the border, with most projections still suggesting that Labour’s Scottish seats will be reduced to single figures in May.
Last night we catalogued a series of its howlers since Murphy took over, culminating in a humiliating climbdown over some false claims about cancelled operations in the Scottish NHS. The party’s Scottish health spokeswoman Jenny Marra turned up on today’s Good Morning Scotland to discuss the subject, and in doing so demonstrated exactly why Scottish voters are deserting it in hundreds of thousands.
There’s been considerable mirth in nationalist circles ever since Jim Murphy became leader of the Scottish Labour branch office late last year. Announcing that he wanted to “reach out” to Yes voters, his idea of an olive branch was to hire three of the most divisive and obnoxious figures to be found anywhere in his party’s entire hinterland, in a move about as conciliatory and unifying as when Rangers signed Mo Johnston.
Counter-intuitively, the link-up with Blair McDougall (who headed Murphy’s successful leadership bid) is the one that makes the most sense. After all, as “Better Together” campaign director McDougall was responsible for turning a 30-point lead for No into a 10-point one, so he clearly knows something about how to appeal to Yes people.
One of the main strengths of the No campaign in the independence referendum was that it had an efficient production line for “truthiness”. Best known as a concept from the US satirical TV show The Colbert Report, the term means things that SOUND as if they’re true, and which people will therefore be inclined to believe, even though they fall apart under any factual scrutiny.
One good example is shown above. The facts on the graphic are individually true, and convey – without ever actually saying so explicitly – the message that Scotland is subsidised by the UK to the tune of £7.6bn a year.
But that message, despite being implied through exclusively true facts, ISN’T true, because the extra “spending” on Scotland is actually borrowing, which Scotland has to pay back. The real truth is that the figures on the left are accurate, and that Scotland heavily subsidises the rest of the UK.
But to walk someone through even the basic explanation of that is quite complicated and involved, whereas the original message is punchy and SOUNDS true. The simpler something is the more people want to believe it, so the implicit lie on the graphic is difficult to dislodge from their minds once it’s in there.
(It works especially well if the media is overwhelmingly on the side of those creating the misleading impression, because they can count on the fact that the mainstream press won’t run any analysis pointing out the flaws in the argument, and the only people who’ll ever encounter the explanation are those who actively seek it out.)
Do you remember the old days, readers? We’re talking about the far-off era of ancient history when Labour insisted that the worst, most evil, most right-wing thing that any government could do was to cut Corporation Tax, and that it was vital Scotland didn’t become independent in case that catastrophe occurred:
We’re feeling a bit stupid right now, readers. Earlier on today we sarcastically dubbed Scottish Labour “geniuses” over their plans to reintroduce alcohol (and sectarian singing) back to Scottish football at exactly the point when Scotland seemed to have finally turned the corner in its dysfunctional relationship with alcohol.
Indeed, for days now Labour have been carrying out a two-pronged stunt-photocall strategy, touring the country standing outside hospital casualty departments looking concerned about an almost entirely imaginary “A&E crisis”, while also leafleting every major football ground promising to let fans get smashed at games again.
Seeking a cheap laugh, we tweeted that we hoped they didn’t get confused and start handing out their “MOAR BOOZE!” literature outside the A&E wards, but then an alert reader pointed out that we were idiots and Jim Murphy was in fact an evil mastermind.
One of the compensations of living in England (from the perspective of editing a website about Scottish politics) is that you get a much clearer picture of how English people – who make up 85% of the UK electorate, and as such in practice determine who the government is – see the country’s political leaders.
For those of you who don’t, here’s Charlie Brooker – a man who’s no fan of the Tories by any stretch of the imagination – casting a weary and exasperated eye over Ed “these strikes are wrong” Miliband on last night’s Weekly Wipe.
In our experience it’s a pretty accurate snapshot of how the hapless Labour leader is regarded by most left-leaning people down on this side of the border. You’ll need to have seen the rest of the episode to get the “Schofield!” joke.
Young Lochinvar on Anything But That: “FC Is that a fact? Just checking. FYI: all sorts were at it feathering their nests at a time of…” Sep 6, 23:49
Young Lochinvar on Anything But That: “HMcH Ford Focus. The settled down ageing badly hairdressers car! Not bad mpg, nae room necessary for the (non existent)…” Sep 6, 23:25
Young Lochinvar on Anything But That: “MB Nah! Not allowed into those sorts of establishments till you were 18 years old. Air Cadets “Verboten” (spelling apols)..…” Sep 6, 22:50
Young Lochinvar on Anything But That: “HMcH Yer projecting again “old boy”.. As for my post; Not at all! I was merely making mild oblique reference…” Sep 6, 22:40
Mark Beggan on Anything But That: “I dont remember much about operation lion-heart. I was drunk in a whore house most of the time. Deutsche girls…” Sep 6, 21:29
Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: “Can’t you read, sam? It’s Mr Beggan to you. Seriously, though. Do you honestly believe you rate being hated? Get…” Sep 6, 21:25
Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: “What is it now, Sooty? Auld Lochnagar always quick to get the shirt lifting accusations in early? Well, he did…” Sep 6, 21:18
sam on Anything But That: “No friends, no wife, no job. Just hatred and Beggan.” Sep 6, 21:01
Young Lochinvar on Anything But That: “MB Wrong (yet) again.. You probably never heard those insults on yer air cadet “Lionheart deployment” in ‘84 (to make…” Sep 6, 21:01
Young Lochinvar on Anything But That: “To the Cow (Chas) from the Confused dot com tv add: “Who’s That Whistling!!! Lighten up FFS..” Sep 6, 20:50
Young Lochinvar on Anything But That: “HMcH Corrie and Emmerdale.. Sigh! Such is life Sweep (or is it Parsley the Lion) to keep a happy marriage.…” Sep 6, 20:42
Mark Beggan on Anything But That: “No they never. You just made that up. It was a Jerry helmet and a Japs eye. That’s why all…” Sep 6, 20:41
Chas on Anything But That: “It is refreshing to see a bout of common sense and realism breaking out on Wings and…….. from an unlikely…” Sep 6, 20:25
Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: “What’s that you say, Sooty? What would Auld Lochnagar ken aboot a TV soap that only his missus watches? You’re…” Sep 6, 20:24
agentx on Anything But That: ““Jenny Gilruth is being groomed as a potential successor to John Swinney” https://www.scottishdailyexpress.co.uk/news/politics/stephen-flynn-infuriates-civil-servants-37632876 —————————————— Could there be a more inappropriate…” Sep 6, 20:15
Mark Beggan on Anything But That: “If anyone turns up declaring that they are chicken farmer then we should really begin to panic.” Sep 6, 20:05
Young Lochinvar on Anything But That: “Call Quality Polis!! Hatey has Northcode locked up in his basement and has stolen his log-in details!!! It’s like a…” Sep 6, 20:03
Mark Beggan on Anything But That: “I would like to read more of what you wrote today. You are on it. Ideological europhiles are yesterday. The…” Sep 6, 20:01
Young Lochinvar on Anything But That: “MB We used to call the Germans “box heads”, they called us “island monkeys” Whits yer hat size Beggars? 12×12…” Sep 6, 20:00
Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: “There’s a precedent. Ribbentrop was a champagne salesman.” Sep 6, 19:53
Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: “Wow, Northy! The bridges are in sheets of flame today. I hope you’ve found the courage and decency to tell…” Sep 6, 19:48
Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: “Man up, Northy! Don’t let sam intimidate and cow you into agreement and obedience. Stand tall! Besides, even if he…” Sep 6, 19:40
Northcode on Anything But That: “Interesting… TURABDIN is chasing symbols: UN intervention external validation geopolitical rescue fatalistic narratives AgentX is describing strategy: democratic legitimacy internal…” Sep 6, 19:16
Northcode on Anything But That: ““Northcode, I have always enjoyed your posts.” As do I yours.” Sep 6, 19:13
Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: “Well, well. I predicted there would be a few things you wouldn’t want to talk about, sam. And my prediction…” Sep 6, 19:12
Mark Beggan on Anything But That: “It is Mr Beggan to you. You dont decide anything about this page. Threats of violence Sam is the squeak…” Sep 6, 19:04
Mark Beggan on Anything But That: “Auf Wiedersehen, Pet Who would have thought a perfume salesman would change German history. It is the end of the…” Sep 6, 18:51
sam on Anything But That: “Usually I scroll past much of what is btl comment regarding it as shite. A good deal of that shite…” Sep 6, 18:49
Young Lochinvar on Anything But That: “Missing person appeal! Will the real Northcode come forward please, his account here has clearly been hacked and it appears…” Sep 6, 18:36
Mark Beggan on Anything But That: “Salmond new how difficult the task to unite Scotland internally would be. Everybody was on board on the anti English…” Sep 6, 18:23