To be honest, readers, we gave up on taking any notice of David Torrance‘s mundane attempts at trolling in the Herald some time ago. But some alert readers pointed us towards this week’s column, suggesting that it was a bald rewriting of history some way beyond their usual bland irritancy.
This was the passage they objected to:
It’s a patronising piece of “shut up and eat your cereal” condescension for sure. But to be fair to Torrance, it does also happen to be true. Wait, not true. The other thing.
The starting pistol hasn’t actually been fired on the two-year Brexit process yet, but now we have a clear statement of when it will be: this morning on The Andrew Marr Show, the Prime Minister pledged that it would happen before the end of next March.
(We might end up broke, in other words, but at least we’ll be good old British broke, with none of those awful smelly foreign Euro-Johnnies around to see it.)
And nobody was getting a sick note.
And for supporters of independence, that’s about as good as news gets.
The Daily Telegraph just released a video called “100 Reasons Why Brexit Was A Good Thing”. It listed them to a soundtrack of “Jerusalem”, the same song that closed the Labour Party conference earlier this week with its stirring ode to just one of the four nations of the United Kingdom.
We’ve saved a few of the highlights below, just in case the Telegraph should delete the video in a fit of sanity. We’ve also added one fake one. See if you can spot it.
Low-wattage Labour list MSP Neil Findlay (rejected by the electorate of Almond Valley by a thumping 8,393 votes in May) puffed himself up to maximum socialism this week and attacked the SNP’s rather more popular Paisley MP Mhairi Black over a Scottish Daily Express story about travel expenses.
It might have been an idea if he’d read the piece all the way to the end.
You can see the full unedited Kezia Dugdale interview with Gordon Brewer on today’s Sunday Politics Scotland at this link, so you can verify that the shortened edit below isn’t misrepresenting anything. But if you don’t have time or attention span for the full 20 minutes, this’ll give you the gist without all the desperate waffling.
We think readers will agree that there can no longer be so much as a scintilla of doubt over whether Kezia believes Jeremy Corbyn can lead Labour to victory.
This is the longest piece of continuous TV exposure Kezia Dugdale will get between now and next year’s crucial council elections. Judge for yourself whether she seized the opportunity, readers.
A Sunday Times/Panelbase poll released today put Scottish Labour’s support at 16%, with the SNP on 50% and the Tories on 21%.
We’re sure that the media will pin Dugdale down over this weekend and we’ll get a detailed and convincing explanation of exactly what it is that she thinks changed about the fundamental nature of Jeremy Corbyn over that solitary month.
It’s long been a bone of contention for Scots – and not just nationalists – that the UK government, by common agreement, wasted the vast wealth windfall of the North Sea on funding Margaret Thatcher’s 1980s programme of deliberate de-industrialisation, mass unemployment, huge tax cuts for the wealthy and bribes to the working class in the form of Right To Buy.
It did so rather than investing the proceeds in a sovereign wealth fund, as demanded by the SNP (and some elements of Labour) and practiced in Norway, whose fund – only set up in 1990 – is now a literal embarrassment of riches.
But the reality is even worse than that. Because according to a 2015 report by the National Resource Governance Institute that’s just come to our attention, the truth is that if the UK had managed its North Sea treasure better, it could have done both.
With the greatest of reluctance, and only in the absence of anything even remotely more interesting, then, let’s have a few words on Scottish Labour’s latest solemn and sincere declaration of its full, total, complete and utter autonomy.
Because while the media is reporting the development that UK Labour has decided to extend a few extra inches of lead to Kezia Dugdale’s branch office as if it had the slightest importance to anything, it seems oddly reluctant to ask the obvious question.
Northcode on The Plague: “Ultimately, this unwelcome situation comes down to Scotland being colonised. And if you can’t see why that is then you…” Aug 5, 10:11
Frank Gillougley on The Plague: “I dunno. I know nothing other than truth is often stranger than fiction. Art imitating life and life imitating art…” Aug 5, 10:01
Onlokker on Or Something: “Anybody else enjoying the wee nutcase Sturgeon noising the SNP and Swinney up? Burning all bridges, and nobody likes her,…” Aug 5, 09:50
Grace Green on The Plague: “In my more than forty years’ experience of persecution for being vaccine injured, when things happen out-of-hours – letters sent…” Aug 5, 09:43
Captain Caveman on The Plague: “Thank you Rev Stu for shining a light on all of this, so that the rest of us can truly…” Aug 5, 09:35
100%Yes on The Plague: “The Sturgeon now Swinney years will go down in history as the docile years in Scottish politics and the most…” Aug 5, 09:23
Hatey McHateface on The Plague: “It fits the definition of anarcho tyranny. Just like our “new” WM government’s announcement yesterday that they have “no choice”…” Aug 5, 09:23
Jamie on The Plague: “How that madman Watson has not been locked up yet, at least in a loony bin is beyond belief.” Aug 5, 08:26
100%Yes on The Plague: “@Jay 5 August, 2026 at 5:56 am I hope this helps.” Aug 5, 08:25
Hatey McHateface on The Plague: “There was an article on Unherd recently exposing the extent of the adoption of trans woo woo in the Met.…” Aug 5, 08:19
Hatey McHateface on The Plague: “Plainly, Ian, it’s not an encitement to anything. It’s a statement of someone’s apathy towards a potential course of action.…” Aug 5, 08:10
Aidan on The Plague: “I think we’re getting into the realms of fantasy there, to quote Captain Mainwairing. Nothing that the Rev is doing…” Aug 5, 07:48
Jay on The Plague: “What is the method for responding directly to a comment when there is no reply facility show with the comment?” Aug 5, 05:56
Ian Morrison on The Plague: “You have been using the English language for decades? yuou laft out mention of how good you are at spelling.…” Aug 5, 05:32
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on The Plague: “GRAHAM LINEHAN | THE GLINNER UPDATE | SUBSTACK Aug 04, 2026 HOW THE BELFAST TELEGRAPH HANDLED HELEN JOYCE The Belfast…” Aug 5, 01:12
Dalif on The Plague: “You must have some amazing blood pressure medication after all that. Anyway, that was a great read.” Aug 5, 00:00
Young Lochinvar on The Plague: “Mrs YL asked what skin moisturisers he’s using, as they clearly aren’t helping..” Aug 4, 23:59
Hatey McHateface on The Plague: “There’s always a silver lining, though. Nobody’s claiming Fanon has the answer to this one.” Aug 4, 23:30
Angus on The Plague: “Police harassment of innocent citizens only happens in a police state. Most of the freedoms hard gained in the last…” Aug 4, 22:51
Jay on The Plague: “Aidan at 9:30pm. No reply facility at your ‘MI5?’ comment. Who knows? The Watson nightmare saga almost beggars belief. It…” Aug 4, 22:44
Jay on The Plague: “Ian, yuou laft out part of the tweet, “….for all I care”. That omission is the act of either a…” Aug 4, 22:27
dearieme on The Plague: “I suppose the days are long gone when you could ask “Under which statute, officer?”. Well done to you for…” Aug 4, 22:10
Aidan on The Plague: “That this was coordinated by MI5?” Aug 4, 21:30
Ross on The Plague: “This is absolutely disgraceful. Whatever else the call at 1,30am is so unneccessary as to be vexatious in itself. Hope…” Aug 4, 21:14
David G on The Plague: “I dread to think what the police do to people who don’t say anything in response to the request that…” Aug 4, 21:05
Frank Waring on The Plague: “I remember reading, I think in Tom Driberg’s ‘Ruling Passions’, that in the 1930’s and 40’s ambitious young police constables…” Aug 4, 21:04
Jay on The Plague: “Aidan: it is necessary to know where Watson made his ‘input’ to the law enforcement system and which officer decided…” Aug 4, 21:00
Jay on The Plague: “Ian Morrison: it would be interesting to learn the basis upon which you think that the Lucy Connolly tweet called…” Aug 4, 20:49
A2 on The Plague: “Wait…. Joined the dots, He was Living in Dunfermline?” Aug 4, 20:49
Hatey McHateface on The Plague: “Plausible. There’s plenty of evidence too about the woke subversion of the police. From taking the knee about Floyd, to…” Aug 4, 20:21
