Alex Salmond will be laid to rest in the green turf of Aberdeenshire today in a quiet and dignified private ceremony. (A public celebration of his life will take place next month.)
Most of Scotland’s press and commentariat beclowned itself shamefully after his death just as it did during his life, but below is a (regrettably short) collection of those who did otherwise and who deserve to be noted honourably beside the man himself.
Redaction is a tricky business, and comes with numerous pitfalls even if you’re being careful, which not everyone is. If you’re involved in creating a document you know will have to be redacted, there are a variety of safeguarding approaches you can adopt.
When I worked on a videogames magazine called Amiga Power in the 1990s, we ran a fun comedy feature about censorship. But because the company that published the magazine had had some unfortunate mishaps in the field, we took extra care by typing all the “offensive” words as random-length strings of Xs when we wrote the article.
And it was lucky that we did, because as you can see in the feature’s strapline, the art department misaligned the red redaction bar on some of them, and if there’d been a sweary in there it would have been easily identified.
Wherever you find giants, you also find parasites, bottom-feeders and carrion. When a mighty lion dies in the jungle, tiny creeping crawling maggots and insects and bacteria feast gleefully on its corpse for many days.
Which naturally brings us to the Scottish media.
The above paragraphs of cowardly innuendo and baseless speculative smearing were penned by Severin Carrell and Libby Brooks in the Guardian on Monday. (They’re not from the ironically-headed “Appreciation” that the same two hacks wrote for Sunday’s Observer, in which they audaciously claimed that Salmond’s success was down to Nicola Sturgeon).
They sneakily imply that Salmond was guilty not only of the sexual assaults of which he was cleared in court, but also of an unspecified number of unnamed others, and make assertions of “disturbing evidence about his personal conduct” without specifying what that evidence or conduct might have been.
Everyone even remotely connected to Scottish politics has known for months that the below is the case. It’s an open secret.
But what’s playing out right now is something much bigger than the fate of one or two or three individuals. It’s the entire future of the credibility of Scotland’s justice system.
Just a quick bit of housekeeping here with regard to the new Wings comments section, which offers far more functionality but has also attracted a few complaints because it’s no longer a straight chronology of oldest-to-newest tweets.
(We could actually change that back, but the cost would be losing the ability to reply directly to individual comments, which is a big loss, so we’re leaving it as it is for now.)
To those beefing because that means you can’t now immediately tell which comments are new, a couple of helpful pointers. The easiest way to fix the problem is a simple one: keep the tab open.
If you keep the most recent page open in a tab on your browser, the Comment Bubble (visible at the bottom left of that pic) will keep track of all new comments – it refreshes every 30 seconds – and highlight them for you in yellow until you’ve read them.
(The little orange circle should take you to the first unread one if you click it.)
Sadly the Bubble stops working if you close the tab or navigate to a new page from it, but since most people have scores of tabs open at a time that shouldn’t be a problem. So there you go.
When times are quiet in Scottish politics, as they currently are, our favourite genre of story is “mainstream press belatedly catches up with Wings Over Scotland”. And so to this morning’s front page splash in the Sunday Mail.
The rumour mill has been grinding about Operation Branchform developments again in the last few days, although we’ve seen too many false dawns now to get overly excited about that. But the Mail’s story sounded awfully familiar.
While we get on with some tinkering behind the scenes in the absence of any Scottish political news – we have an exciting new comment system and the Contact form finally works again! – readers may wish to enjoy the full marathon three-and-a-quarter hours of last month’s fun indyref anniversary event at the Glasgow Science Centre.
Young Lochinvar on The Land Of No Laws: “AI Dun @ 5.42 The hoores excuse.. You Tories really are a right bunch, just lurking, beneath the radar but…” May 20, 00:15
Young Lochinvar on The Land Of No Laws: “HMcH Hurry up now catamite! 11.20 is getting awfy close to midnight and Matron switching off the lights and turning…” May 19, 23:56
Young Lochinvar on The Land Of No Laws: “Dan @ 9.44 It’s because he’s a Scotchland office superannuated/ private healthcare scheme tax hating/ aspiring evader Harry hoofter with…” May 19, 23:45
Dan on The Land Of No Laws: “So just diversion and no effort to provide detailed costings on the health provision model you want. Yer not the…” May 19, 23:39
Geri on The Land Of No Laws: “Faithless people? Away & behave! They’re defending their territory. WTF that had to do with his comments is anyones guess.…” May 19, 23:31
Geri on The Land Of No Laws: ““if they can’t get the huns to win, will try to get the wee huns over the line.” LOL! Love…” May 19, 23:21
Hatey McHateface on The Land Of No Laws: “Credit where due, Confused, that’s a good post. Seems you missed an obvious solution to Scottish football’s sectarian problems though.…” May 19, 23:20
Young Lochinvar on The Land Of No Laws: “Well happy anniversary tomorrow, particularly for the Pict supporters on here of tomorrow’s anniversary of the Battle of Dunnichen/ Nechtansmere…” May 19, 23:18
Hatey McHateface on The Land Of No Laws: ““our ancestors were ethnically cleansed, displaced, slaughtered & starved” Are you sure, Geri? Only, I would have thought that if…” May 19, 23:08
Hatey McHateface on The Land Of No Laws: “@ Dan says: 19 May, 2026 at 9:44 pm “prick” “twat” “feck” “arse” “drink” You should get out more, Dan,…” May 19, 22:56
Red on The Land Of No Laws: “Geri, take your suicidal empathy elsewhere. We don’t need any more faithless people. We need people who are for the…” May 19, 22:52
Hatey McHateface on The Land Of No Laws: “If you intend to play the “native Scot” cards, Alf, I hope you’re holding a good hand. I can trace…” May 19, 22:44
Geri on The Land Of No Laws: “& how would you know that? I think they’d be rather proud & show empathy considering our ancestors were ethnically…” May 19, 22:29
Confused on The Land Of No Laws: “it’s funny how the podcast is taking over as the dominant form; even the BBC is doing them, since they…” May 19, 22:22
Willie on The Land Of No Laws: “Just switched on tbe BBC news. Silly me, should have known better, but the world neadlines are that Arsenal have…” May 19, 22:16
Red on The Land Of No Laws: “If we’re going to talk “pathetic”, why are you, a Scottish man, flying the “Palestinian” flag? You think they’re your…” May 19, 21:59
Dan on The Land Of No Laws: “One ponders how John Hatey Main will cover his health insurance premiums or pay for his and family’s medical treatments…” May 19, 21:44
Alf Baird on The Land Of No Laws: ““Are these colonialists with you now?” Aye, they are all over this site like a bad rash, de-basing native Scots…” May 19, 21:44
Jamie on The Land Of No Laws: “Cheating SFA now talking about deducting Celtic points, so that Celtic will be the first and only club in Scotland…” May 19, 21:36
Hatey McHateface on The Land Of No Laws: “Some good points there, Southernbystander. I believe the parasitic infestation that is woke is too entrenched within the NHS. It…” May 19, 21:28
George Ferguson on The Land Of No Laws: “An update on the Official Match Delegate Report situation. Both the SFA and SPFL have received the reports. The normal…” May 19, 21:25
Hatey McHateface on The Land Of No Laws: “Night, night, Donny. Dinna forget yer tacos.” May 19, 21:12
Aidan on The Land Of No Laws: “And you’ve now added three more, you trying to be James Cheyne?” May 19, 21:07
Hatey McHateface on The Land Of No Laws: ““Do the voices keep you awake at night?” Indeed they do, Northy has often stated as much. He always attributes…” May 19, 21:07
Southernbystander on The Land Of No Laws: “Northcode, very much like ‘downtrodden’ then?” May 19, 21:03
Southernbystander on The Land Of No Laws: “Hatey, ‘Sure. But the wokerati infesting the NHS . . .’ Yes, but that ain’t socialism. Socialism is what founded…” May 19, 20:58
Northcode on The Land Of No Laws: “Right, I’m bored with this place now… too many colonialists on here the nicht. Anyway, I’ve skelped thair erses raw…” May 19, 20:52
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on The Land Of No Laws: “AUSTRALIA URGED TO PROTECT WOMEN-ONLY SPACES AFTER ‘INSANE’ COURT JUDGEMENT Australian legislators have been urged to uphold biological reality after…” May 19, 20:44
Northcode on The Land Of No Laws: “You are hilarious… I bet no-one has ever said that to you before, eh? Well, said it and meant it,…” May 19, 20:40
Northcode on The Land Of No Laws: “Fuck off. I found that comment to be quite useful, but only if you follow my instruction and… well, fuck…” May 19, 20:31