She’s currently contesting Edinburgh West, which the party has some credible hopes of winning, having held the seat for almost 20 years prior to 2015. And it seems that her former employer has decided to try to give her a helping hand.
And, y’know, they’re really not allowed to do that.
Something really quite strange happened yesterday. The Prime Minister of the United Kingdom was caught red-handed in the act of telling a bare-faced, unarguable lie in the middle of a general election campaign, and nobody cared.
Reacting to the Crown Prosecution Service decision not to prosecute dozens of Tory MPs who’d broken the law in getting elected in 2015, the PM offered up a quote, which was reported in most of the newspapers:
Nice wee bit of snark on “all the major parties, and the Scottish nationalists” there. But there’s a slight problem with the statement, which is that it’s an absolute lie.
In the last few days we’ve been talking a lot about the bizarre perversion of arithmetic that now seems to dominate political campaigning in the UK, and which has the media so tied in knots that the poor Telegraph now thinks nothing of saying the SNP gained council seats, lost them and gained them again in the space of four paragraphs.
But numbers are confusing and we’re very hungry at the moment after some major dental surgery made eating difficult, so we weren’t really paying attention until Ruth Davidson started talking about pies.
Most of the papers today are full of stories screaming hysterically about a (real, but somewhat exaggerated) decline in Scottish educational standards. But if the contents of those papers are anything to go by, Scotland’s schools have been disgorging idiots into the general population for a lot longer than the last 10 years.
He’d very kindly sent us a copy of the same article he’d sent the Beeb. We attach it below. We’ve highlighted in bold the only bits that didn’t make it into the BBC piece.
When our dear old pal the Scottish Labour super-goon Duncan Hothersall tweeted this earlier today, we just couldn’t resist a wee fact-check. We love to see people take the moral high ground, but numbers are fluid these days and you can’t be too careful.
Some manner of strange, alien vortex swallowed the very concept of arithmetic as we know it earlier this evening. The answer to the question “what is 431 minus 425?” was variously reported by the media as -7, -14, +31 and -30, with nowhere that we could find offering the seemingly obvious answer of “6”. But that was only the beginning.
Because language wasn’t immune from the sudden redefinitions either. The Tories, who finished 155 seats behind the SNP, nevertheless proclaimed themselves not only the winners of the election, but the sole winners.
100%Yes on These Words Are My Own: “The worry for Sturgeon is, what secrets does wings have hidden away in that large safe.” Jul 18, 17:08
Onlooker on These Words Are My Own: “THE GENIUS OF THE CROWD By Charles Bukowski There is enough treachery, hatred, violence, absurdity in the average human being…” Jul 18, 16:33
Hatey McHateface on These Words Are My Own: “I’m genuinely curious, Alf. Of your “numerous former colonized peoples, now UN member states”, how many of these were split…” Jul 18, 16:01
Insider on These Words Are My Own: “Ian Foulds says: 18 July, 2026 at 2:57 pm Now is the time and now is the hour Nope! Memmi…” Jul 18, 15:37
Alf Baird on These Words Are My Own: ““The non-SNP parts of movement has signally failed so far to come up with any plausible alternative… as far as…” Jul 18, 15:20
Hatey McHateface on These Words Are My Own: “Aye, Alf. We have no choice. We have to be back-stabbing thieves, crims, degenerates and embezzlers. Epic fuckups too. Some…” Jul 18, 15:15
Hatey McHateface on These Words Are My Own: “Well said, Alf. You, of course, must be withholding the additional taxes levied on Scottish residents by the non-existent Scottish…” Jul 18, 15:03
Ian Foulds on These Words Are My Own: “Now is the time and now is the hour” Jul 18, 14:57
katielass42 on These Words Are My Own: “I believe, as others, have so rightly said, the amount of evidence of duplicity, deceit and dishonesty that has pervaded…” Jul 18, 14:23
Northcode on These Words Are My Own: “Aye, Alf. Folk often propose in this place that us Scots should fix what we can’t possibly fix until we…” Jul 18, 13:16
Andy Ellis on These Words Are My Own: “There can be no meaningful progress on independence until the SNP is at least rendered helpless and preferably utterly destroyed.…” Jul 18, 13:11
Northcode on These Words Are My Own: ““…If Nicola Sturgeon wants to sue me for defamation, nothing prevents her…” Well, sure… nothing legally stops her. But practically?…” Jul 18, 13:10
Cynicus on These Words Are My Own: “Long gone are there days when Scotland’s MSM ignored or even ridiculed the Rev. Now, they cannot get enough of…” Jul 18, 12:57
Alf Baird on These Words Are My Own: “” If Scotland is ever to be independent, we need to at least have the basics in place of a…” Jul 18, 12:40
Alf Baird on These Words Are My Own: ““So what are your SNP sources motivations and to them what comes next?” Postcolonial theory tells us that the colonizer’s…” Jul 18, 12:19
Rev. Spooner on These Words Are My Own: “6. Those CalMac ferry contracts. Just incompetence, or worse?” Jul 18, 12:06
Cynicus on These Words Are My Own: ““ Get me Beltrami” was the fabled injunction to the polis on arresting a crook of VERY high standing. He…” Jul 18, 11:51
Captain Caveman on These Words Are My Own: “You have the heart of a lion, Rev Stu. Cap doffed. Again.” Jul 18, 11:51
crazycat on These Words Are My Own: “I’ve seen it suggested – can’t remember where – that these items were removed because he “bought them with his…” Jul 18, 11:44
Alf Baird on These Words Are My Own: ““exposing the utter corruption of the Scottish state” There is no such entity as a ‘Scottish state’, yet, unless I…” Jul 18, 11:38
JohnH. on These Words Are My Own: ““I’m in the clear” More gangster talk.” Jul 18, 11:28
Hatey McHateface on These Words Are My Own: “Putting to one side all of Northy’s “look at me” bloviating … Both protagonists (Salmond and Sturgeon) are out of…” Jul 18, 10:21
BH on These Words Are My Own: “The long days in prison will fly by for Nicola as she won’t recall them.” Jul 18, 10:19
Kate L on These Words Are My Own: “Thank god for obstinate men like you Stu. Decency lives.” Jul 18, 10:08
Xaracen on A Matter Of Declinature: “I repeat, Aidan, it doesn’t matter how abstruse the legal arguments get, your arguments are irrelevant because the Union wasn’t…” Jul 18, 10:06
diabloandco on These Words Are My Own: “They used to say that about Beltrami.” Jul 18, 09:56
Dan on These Words Are My Own: “Indeed, it does all seem like a bit of theatre with certain scenes being scheduled and performed for the masses.…” Jul 18, 09:51
100%Yes on These Words Are My Own: “The WoMAN is a liar and a coward, she won’t. Your money safe better invest in NS&I.” Jul 18, 09:36
Alan on These Words Are My Own: “I am still of the hope that at least one of the alphabetties will realise the error of their ways,…” Jul 18, 09:22
Patsy Millar on These Words Are My Own: “If she does take the bait and opts for a court case I’ll be happy to contribute to any crowdfunding…” Jul 18, 09:20
