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Wings Over Scotland


A throw of the dice

Posted on May 25, 2017 by

The spanking new issue of Viz, which is totally still a thing, is out today at all good newsagents. The cover promises a “FANTASTIC FREE VOTING AID” inside, and we thought you’d be at least mildly and fleetingly amused by the Scottish aspect. Of it.

Pop out to the shops and buy a Viz*, readers. (Or subscribe to try three issues for a mere £1.) It’s just as funny as it used to be but much less popular, so it’s cool again.

.

*Wings Over Scotland has no connection to Viz or Dennis Publishing Ltd and has received no inducement for this endorsement. Although we’re open to offers.

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    127 to “A throw of the dice”

    1. Proud Cybernat says:

      Are they trying to imply that Scotland is a one party state? Or that there’s really no other point in voting for anyone else in Scotland because the rest are all arses?

      Hmmm…

    2. Capella says:

      Brilliant. So glad Mr Putin is on our side. I can safely carry on watching cat videos on youtube.

    3. starlaw says:

      YUP that sums it up.

    4. Conan the Librarian says:

      Why don’t we have a screaming Lord Sutch? Darling and Foulkes try, but…

    5. Skip_NC says:

      I think of Viz in the same way as Derek Hatton once described Neil Kinnock as a potential prime minister.

    6. naina tal says:

      Is the screaming lord no potted heid ?
      Probably as much use as some o the other lords mentioned oanywey
      Deed or Alive!

    7. David Caledonia says:

      I think we are all being hoodwinked anyway, i have noticed Theresa May has a very strange way of walking, its a kind of sideways kind of walk, and then one day i noticed it was not really Theresa May, it was Mr Putin wearing a face mask of her, and walking about in a rather fetching red dress and a set of matching earrings, but he did not fool me, i can tell that walk anywhere even with his stiletto heels on heh heh heh

    8. Ian Brotherhood says:

      I don’t buy Viz but my neighbour does. I always follow him to the newsagent, watch him buying it from behind the bread shelves, then follow him back again and he’s never clicked yet!

    9. Free Scotland says:

      So, Treeza May has a one in six chance of capturing the vote of the people of England, Wales and NornIron, but nae chance in Scotland. Sounds about right.

    10. ScotsRenewables says:

      The first issue of Viz had what is still my favourite Top Tip of all time:

      Drill a hole in your fridge door so you can check to see if the light goes out when you close it

    11. heedtracker says:

      Mayhem’s tories lose June 8, I personally won’t be able to stop laughing for the rest of my vile sep life, just at the BBC, Express, SUN, Heil perverts alone…Rule Englandtannia, all Heil Farage, strong, stable, Brexit British Empire 2.0, Her Majesty the Queen of loyal BritScots Jaiky Bird, Sir Wullie Young for President.

    12. Proud Cybernat says:

      The real world, however, is even stranger than Viz (or maybe not):

      Party ——————————– # Councillors (England)
      UKIP ———————————— 1
      Monster Raving Loony Party—— 7

    13. Bob Mack says:

      Just after the Americans won their Independence from GB, they temporarily named their country Freedonia before reverting back to United States.

      The famous Marx Brothers made a film called Duck Soup and used the title of Freedonia as a fictional country involved.

      Duck Soup is a complete satire on the ruling classes and their minnion politicians, much as we see today in the United Kingdom.
      You should watch it if you can. Everybody we know is there in some forms or other. Entitlement, plots, aggression,war,dirty tricks specialists.sycophants. All there.

      Nicola has earned her six sides of that dice . I have never known any ,and I do mean any, Scottish politician who has put so much effort in to improving Scotland and the conditions of its occupants.

      If there is a “Strong and Stable” leader on these islands it is that young woman.

      The rest——Duck Soup.

    14. David says:

      Does anyone remember the Beverly Hillbillies, I think the fathers name was jed, they had discovered oil on their land and moved to Beverly Hills, so one day they arrived to look at a big house they where thinking of buying
      They came out the big car and jeds financial guy says, give the guy a tip, so jed walks over and says to the guy, there is going to be an early frost, so don’t plant your potatoes to early this year lol

    15. Welsh Sion says:

      Objection to Proud Cybernat @ 11.13 a.m.

      Here are three Monster Raving Loony Party policies which have become law.

      – votes at 18
      – passports for pets
      – all-day pub openings

      And in another twist. I can not vote for EITHER National Party in Wales or Scotland which I belong to – coz I don’t live there. Yet, an ex-pat Brit in say, South Africa, who has lived in Jo’burg for less than 15 years and has retained him/herself on the register for Auchermuchty North, CAN vote in this General Election.

      How crazy is that?

    16. Capella says:

      Alan Clark, MP and Tory Grandee psychopath (deceased), read VIZ. I remember him reading out a Top Tip:
      Taxi drivers! Why don’t you fix the indicators on your cabs. Then other drivers would know where the f*** you are going.

      Glad VIZ is carrying on its sterling work.

    17. Brad Millar says:

      best Viz stories were Biffa Bacon and the fat slags … used to buy the viz in the late 1980s and the early 1990s

    18. Brad Millar says:

      The best Viz stories were Biffa Bacon and the fat slags … used to buy the viz in the late 1980s and the early 1990s

    19. Like Scotland`s chances,

      England at least have Caroline Lucas,

      Wales have the vivacious (wasted on Wales, could we no swap her for Kezzie or the Mooth) Leanne Wood,

      but NrnIrn, to quote mad Irishman from Braveheart,

      “The Lord tells me he can get me out of this mess,

      but he`s pretty sure you`re f#cked”.

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yFCvg8uokZc

    20. Bradford Millar says:

      The best Viz stories were Biffa Bacon and the fat slags … used to buy the viz in the late 1980s and the early 1990s

    21. Liam says:

      May I just point out, before this discussion goes much further, that ‘dice’ is a plural. One of those six-sided, random selection devices on its own is a ‘die!.

      “Alea iacta est” – ‘The die is cast’, not ‘the dice is cast’.

      Don’t make me grind my teeth again, people. Please.

    22. call me dave says:

      Ah a wee breathing space for a while thank goodness.
      I’m cutting the Scottish one out to play ‘bingo’ with some SLABs I know.

      PS:
      Bought a ‘fidget spinner’ yesterday to cheer me up.
      Rymans. £2.99 excellent fun.

      Grand-daughter nicked it this morning… 🙁

    23. Welsh Sion says:

      You’re not getting your mitts on “our Leanne”, Scot Finlayson!

      Not even if you apologise for that out-of-character win @ Murrayfield earlier this year! (You’re welcome to join the Party, tho …)

    24. Ian Brotherhood says:

      @Bradford Millar –

      In late-80s I worked in an office where Viz was a must-read. We had a very well-spoken colleague, Ruth, who used to read ‘Fat Slags’ aloud for us and she was brilliant at it.

      Soo-perb!

      My favourite was ‘Black Bag’:

      https://nothingbutafan.files.wordpress.com/2016/01/viz-37-black-bag.jpg

    25. Seeing as we are being Viz silly, my prediction:
      Conservative
      312
      Labour
      238
      Liberal Democrat
      14
      Democratic Unionist
      7
      Scottish National
      54
      Independent
      6
      Sinn Féin
      6
      Plaid Cymru
      4
      Social Democratic & Labour Party
      3
      Ulster Unionist Party
      1
      UK Independence Party
      0
      Green
      3
      Vacant

      Speaker
      There will be a ‘coalition of chaos’, with the SNP propping up Corbyn if he agrees to a second Indyref in October 2018.
      Conservatives 312, Dup 7, Ulster Unionist 1, will scream about the Blue Tories having more seats, therefore..
      I doubt that the Lib Dems would prop them up this time.
      I wonder what odds the bookies would offer me?

    26. crazycat says:

      @ Liam at 11.41

      That’s one of my pet hates too! Up there with data as singular.

    27. Tam Fae Somewhere says:

      My favourite Viz:

      Why spend a fortune on a personal number plate when you can change your name by deed poll?

      Mr ST66GYP,
      Edinburgh

    28. @Welsh Sion

      Didn`t know Leanne had been arrested in Scotland (2007) at Faslane while protesting against Trident,

      spookily enough Nicola was at the same demo as was Caroline Lucas,

      wish all politicians had the heart and soul of these three,

      remember Rugby and football is just `bread and circuses`

      deliberately keeping the people from focusing on the real issues.

    29. Rev. Stuart Campbell says:

      “May I just point out, before this discussion goes much further, that ‘dice’ is a plural.”

      Um, there are four dice depicted…

    30. call me dave says:

      Ah well no eggshells broken at FMQs today.

    31. Bootsy81 says:

      I’ve had them liked of Facebook for years. Does that make me cool again?

    32. Bob Mack says:

      Better no talk about mice then. Oh my. Never mind. Live and let die Oops did it again.

    33. fletch49er says:

      Is it just all Nicola Sturgeon because she’s the only one they know and can’t be arsed finding out who the rest are 😀

    34. fletch49er says:

      Loved Berty Blunt, but his parrot was a cu…..

    35. fletch49er says:

      Loved Berty Blunt, but his parrot was a cu….

    36. galamcennalath says:

      Ian Brotherhood says:

      My favourite was ‘Black Bag’

      Very good. I was completely unaware of this parody version of Black Bob.

      As a child on a farm with sheep and collies, I thought Black Bob was great. I had totally forgot about it’s existence, the real version that is 🙂

      https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_Bob_(comics)

      http://tinyurl.com/n736xj5

    37. Liam says:

      Rev. Stuart Campbell says:
      25 May, 2017 at 12:25 pm

      “May I just point out, before this discussion goes much further, that ‘dice’ is a plural.”

      Um, there are four dice depicted…

      I know. I was just getting my word in before people started saying things like: “Nicola has earned her six sides of that dice.” 🙂

    38. Croompenstein says:

      As much use as tits on a fish 🙂

      Harrison, Kez and wee Willie are as much use as tits on a fish…

    39. Welsh Sion says:

      Panem et circenses, indeed, Scot Finlayson.

      Am on your side, too!

    40. Gordon Chalmers says:

      Viz is still great as you say Rev. I’ve been a subscriber ever since I moved to Mull 20 years ago and the only newsagent in town at that time refused to stock it because it offended him. Unlike the jazz mags on his top shelf! ?

    41. Capella says:

      Or referenda

    42. JLT says:

      LOL …I just picture Ruth flying into a rage and cursing and swearing very loudly while Kezia just sits there shaking her head in violent denial.

      Hopefully …the SNP will be returned with 50(+) MPs. Then it’s game on from a Scottish perspective. If Theresa has a mandate …so does our Nicola.

      And if we’ve learned anything about Theresa over this last year, she is no Maggie, and nor does she dig her heels when it comes to maintaining a stance. The minute serious resistance is offered, Theresa just crumbles. She’s not Prime Minister material …that’s for sure.

      I would love to be a fly on the wall when Nicola and Theresa next meet after the GE should the SNP have another roaring success. One of Nicola’s infamous steely glares will break Theresa’s spirit right there and then.

    43. Desimond says:

      Wee Wullie Rennie reminds me of Terry Fuckwit

      Ruth is surely Millie Tant with all that pent up anger.

      George Foulkes is 8-Ace

      Kezia shares the same glaikit look that Finbar Saunders used to have in final caption scene when his mum and neighbour were behind the door

      Meanwhile, Murdo Fraser tries to become Billy Pope from the classic Glasgow comic “Electric Soup” which also covers Scottish Labour becoming the suicidal characters “The Wildebeest”

    44. Desimond says:

      Is there a plural for peddants?

    45. galamcennalath says:

      Capella says:

      Or referenda

      You made wonder. The plural of referendum in English is referendums, it seems.

      ” The use of “referenda” as a plural form in English (treating it as a Latin word and attempting to apply to it the rules of Latin grammar) is thus insupportable according to the rules of both Latin and English grammar alike. “

      https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Referendum#Etymology_and_plural_form

    46. galamcennalath says:

      JLT says:

      Then it’s game on from a Scottish perspective. If Theresa has a mandate …so does our Nicola.

      Indeed. As I understand it, the now delayed SNP Manifesto will say that a ‘win’ for the SNP means Nicola wants a seat at the centre of Brexit negotiations.

      The chances of a single market pushing SG representative at the centre of hard Brexiteers is something the Tories will never countenance.

      Great move because it will force TMay to refuse the democratic will of the Scots, again. However this time it will be at an election called by TMay to reinforce her position so refusing to accept Scotland’s decision is another great big six inch nail into the Union’s coffin.

    47. Robert Graham says:

      Real searching questions are starting to be asked about mayhems record as home secretary , a video of her telling the police they are scaremongering about the consequences of her cuts is now doing the rounds , what started as a bonus to the tories I know really a bit sick using the deaths of children for political gain ,well thats normal for most tories ,Sick ,I wonder what the murdoch press were promised after their hatchet job on corbyn and linking him with the IRA , SKY news and the SUN both involved .
      Maybe just Maybe the carefully engineered snap election could by events beyond their control get away from them . OOPS .

    48. Breastplate says:

      It’s a sad state of affairs when real life here is a parody of Viz.

      My personal favourite from Viz was the Top Tips section.

    49. Arbroath1320 says:

      Just cause I’m curious you understand. 😉

      If you have one copy of Viz you obviously have a Viz but what if you have more than one copy do you have Vizes or do you have Vie? 😉

      I.m asking for a friend you understand. (my alter persona Stupidous Idiotious! 😀 )

    50. Proud Cybernat says:

      “…another great big six inch nail into the Union’s coffin.”

      Is there any room to actually get any more nails into the Union’s coffin? Many more nails does it need?

      Just askin’ like.

    51. Capella says:

      @ galamcennalath – I know. It’s like agenda which is really plural but in English we treat it as singular.

      Although agenda is the plural of agendum in Latin, in standard modern English it is normally used as a singular noun with a standard plural form (agendas). See also data and media

      Let’s not get too upset about all these errata.

    52. Robert J. Sutherland says:

      Desimond @ 13:14,

      You just used it. Except you mis-spelt it. It’s “pedants”, just to get it precisely correct. =grin=

    53. jimnarlene says:

      Spoilt bastard, now which Scots politician could that be…

    54. Capella says:

      Another excellent post from Craig Murray on the Manchester bombing and some of the implications. We are lucky to have someone with experience of how the FCO operates.

      https://www.craigmurray.org.uk/archives/2017/05/that-critical-threat/

    55. Desimond says:

      @Robert J. Sutherland

      🙂

    56. Proud Cybernat says:

      That Craig Murray post is a real eye-opener:

      https://www.craigmurray.org.uk/archives/2017/05/that-critical-threat/

      (Thanks Capella)

    57. galamcennalath says:

      Capella says:

      Craig Murray

      I tend to agree with everything CM says here. The timing was not coincidental. Terrorism and politics are completely intertwined when it comes to radical Islam.

      The biggest kick in the teeth the people of England could give the Jihadists now would be to make Corbyn the next UK PM!

    58. Capella says:

      @ Proud Cynernat – welks! and some of the btl comments are interesting. Such as:

      https://www.craigmurray.org.uk/archives/2017/05/that-critical-threat/comment-page-1/#comment-680628

    59. Jack Murphy says:

      TODAY. ARCHIVED.
      Scottish Parliament TV is now uploaded onto YouTube.
      FIRST MINISTER’S QUESTIONS. 25/05/2017

      http://tinyurl.com/m5jkhln

    60. Cuilean says:

      If the SNP get a bigger mandate (bigger % of votes) than May’s Tories; then the SNP mandate trumps the Tory mandate and the SNP have a bigger mandate for a second indyref2 than they Tories have to deny us one.

      Ruth Davidson’s faux gravitas voice & overall phoney demeanour is really starting to annoy me.

      We need to burst her over inflated balloon of pomposity, on 8th June 2017.

    61. heedtracker says:

      jimnarlene says:
      25 May, 2017 at 1:48 pm
      Spoilt bastard, now which Scots politician could that be…

      Sir Wullie Young OBE, FRS, KMG, VC, KISS ING wi Barnie Crockett, frae Aberdeen, ran up a £1.2bn debt, never telt nae c_cnt, christ only knows on what, made himself a fortune, got booted out last cooncil election. He’ll be back.

    62. Artyhetty says:

      What no STRuth, or Keezia to ‘stop’ the SNP! No one tell STRuth it’s a one horse race she might feel right left out. 🙂

      I know it’s a GE, but some might be forgiven for thinking otherwise of late, much of the attention having been on Scotland and the FM. What with ‘debates’ on tv about Scotland’s public services last week.

    63. maxxmacc says:

      Viz speaks more truth and sense than BBC Scotland, though admittedly that’s not hard!

      With this election though, it isn’t the Russkies affecting the result but ISIS (whoever they really are) as the bombing has saved the Tories bacon, by diverting attention away from the nasty policies of May. Now the news isn’t filled with how voting Tory will result in you losing your home should you get sick, but instead the news is filled with how May would stand up to ‘terror’ better than Jeremy.

    64. Craig P says:

      Viz peaked for me with ‘Motorists. When approaching a green light slow down and come to a complete halt in case Billy Idol is coming the other way on a motorbike.’

    65. maxxmacc says:

      The craigmurray site won’t display on my laptop for ‘security’ reasons. Quelle surprise. It won’t be long before sites like this are blocked too.

      I still maintain that 1984 wasn’t so much a work of fiction, as an instruction manual for governments on how to control the people.

    66. carjamtic says:

      ….aaah yes,the art of fingering politicians fell out of favour after the John Major row,now they just do what ever they want,apparently dead elephants don’t count as immigrants any more.

      Yes they need the tusks you see,they make superb knitting needles,ideal for hand knitting spaghetti and exporting it to the states,it seems they don’t know how to twirl it on a spoon.

      Changed days since Brexit,Murdo was down as a stunt double for Nigel in the Tarzan remake,when he disrobed for the screen test,the young lefty in charge says wtf is that ?

      Seems in his youth,on a drunken night out with some sailors,Murdo had a life sized tattoo of his precious Willie done in a Real Madrid strip,a laddish prank,anyway the transfer never went ahead,but the director was having none of it,fired on the spot.

      Well he then had to sit the test to become a blue meanie in Edinburgh,easy to pass,got 75% just for getting his name right and the rest as they say is history…destined for great things in the house,great things,Alistair will look after him…for another ?.

    67. stu mac says:

      @galamcennalath
      ===================

      I was always a great fan of Black Bob myself, used to buy the annuals too when I was older (you can still find some on Amazon 2nd hand but a bit expensive. A more recent publication reproduces some of the old stories: https://tinyurl.com/knwm47j

    68. Robert Peffers says:

      @Conan the Librarian says: 25 May, 2017 at 10:53 am:

      “Why don’t we have a screaming Lord Sutch? Darling and Foulkes try, but…”

      Well we do have an, “Oh! For Crying out Loud”, leader of the opposition – will that do?

    69. Bob p says:

      Welsh sion 11.30am. That p**ses me off as well.I can vote tory fib dems,liebor,(greens which it will have to be). Down here in England , but I cannot vote for the national party of my country,yet someone in s africa or expats on the costas can vote .democracy my a**e. Ram their lying divided union where the sun don’t shine.

    70. Bob p says:

      Jimnarlene 1.48pm. Wonder who sid the sexist could be lol

    71. Nostalgia days. I recall the same DCThomson format for at least two others. Kidnapped? And Treasure Island? Maybe Oliver Twist too? Anyone else remember?
      I used to read Dandy and Beano comics on holiday, in a shed, hidden on top of a stack of peats, with a den suitably scooped out. Did get a roasting from my uncle, for having broken the peats climbing up there!

    72. Robert Peffers says:

      @David Caledonia says: 25 May, 2017 at 11:00 am:

      “I think we are all being hoodwinked anyway, i have noticed Theresa May has a very strange way of walking, its a kind of sideways kind of walk … “

      Ach! Ye micht hae seen her oan wan o yon days whan she pit her nickers oan in a twist. (According to press reports she seems frequently prone to do so).

    73. Proud Cybernat says:

      maxxmacc says:

      The craigmurray site won’t display on my laptop for ‘security’ reasons.

      I get that problem too when I use Google Chrome but can access no problem when using Firefox.

    74. Oops, still O/T a bit. Rupert the bear was good as an annual, but far too slow in the two frames a day Express. Trouble was, if you read it to the kids, you were inclined to speak in rhyme for the rest of the day. Then there was Just William. Forgot I was so well read!

    75. Robert Peffers says:

      @Bob Mack says: 25 May, 2017 at 11:14 am:

      “The famous Marx Brothers made a film called Duck Soup and used the title of Freedonia as a fictional country involved.”

      Like this:-
      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dsw9jYU_rJI

    76. Walter Scott says:

      Not even one side of the dice has got Fat Boab’s face on it. According to the media , she could win the election even though she isn’t standing. Are they still styling her as FM elect? Fat Boab for PM

    77. Robert Peffers says:

      @Capella says: 25 May, 2017 at 1:08 pm:

      “Or referenda”

      Mind you, Capella, if Mayhem tries to stop another indy referendum we could have an indy plebiscite instead.

    78. geeo says:

      Had 2 junk mail…sorry..manifesto leaflets posted today. (Linlithgow and Falkirk East.

      Labour and Tory.
      ………
      Labour one.

      From Joan Coombes, former deputy leader of Falkirk Council for last 5 years (coalition with Tories).

      Sent her this…

      “Are you the same Joan Coombes who has spent the last 5 YEARS in COALITION with THE TORIES on Falkirk council, and as a leading figure on that Lab/Tory council ?

      Yet here you are now, bold as brass, trying to become an MP on a “get rid of the tories” ticket…!!

      You are an utter hypocrite.

      Falkirk is a shambles because of YOU and YOUR TORY CHUMS.

      You have no interest in the welfare of the people of falkirk, you are only in it for what YOU can get for yourself.

      You are the type of politician the people of falkirk can well do without.

      I just read your election leaflet, and note it was printed by A McLay and Company Ltd, in CARDIFF.

      Why did you not use a local Printing business?

      Or even on in Scotland ?

      As i said, fake to the bone”.
      ………..

      Tory one.

      “Question for Charles Kennedy.

      I just received your election blurb for Linlithgow and Falkirk East.

      Could you exain why the Bar Graphs are NOT in PROPORTION for labour and the lib dems ?

      It would appear that YOU as the candidate named on this election paraphenalia, are trying to deliberately MISLEAD people into thinking only YOUR PARTY can defeat the SNP.

      This is borne out by the fact that the graph is accurate for the SNP/Tory comparisons.

      Also, Ruth Davidson is clearly stating that your party will oppose the SNP just for the sake of opposing, rather than opposing when appropriate and being supportives on matters of consensus.

      Is that also YOUR personal position ?

      If it is, that would indicate that, if you were the MP representing this area, you would be diametrically opposed to helping people of a different political bent to you.

      This means you are incapable of fulfilling your legal requirement to represent ALL your prospective constituents.

      Do you agree with Ruth Davidson’s message on YOUR election leaflet” ?
      ……..
      Awaiting response (but not holding breath)

    79. John H says:

      James O’Brien show this morning.
      Theresa May condemned out of her own mouth at the Police Federation Conference 2015.

      http://www.lbc.co.uk/radio/presenters/james-obrien/police-officer-theresa-may-cuts-james-obrien/

    80. Dan Huil says:

      Primrose deflowered Oor Wullie.

    81. Thepnr says:

      @geeo

      Hahaha very good, I’m not sure that Labour or Tory politicians are actually capable of feeling shame. No harm in trying though.

    82. AlbertaScot says:

      A little soft for my liking, but this guy does get his point across.

      It wuz Mayhem and the Tories wot dun it.

      Military deployment is a step change in UK policing

      24 May 2017

      The deployment of military personnel (Operation Temperer) to assist police in the aftermath of Monday’s terrorist attack in Manchester is a significant step change in keeping the public safe.

      Steve White, Chair of the Police Federation of England and Wales said: “As always, the response of emergency workers in the face of adversity has been second to none. The welcome support of the military to free up armed officers and offer public reassurance will no doubt be managed in the same professional, resolute way.

      But, as welcome as this is, we cannot avoid the reasons it is needed at all. There is no ignoring the fact that we, the police, simply do not have the resources to manage an event like this on our own.”

      As the service continues to try and keep up with emerging crime types and additional demand, both immediate resilience and resilience going forward will be an area requiring robust debate and tough decisions, he said.

      Addressing the Home Secretary at the Police Federation’s annual conference last week, Mr White made the point that it used to be a case of ‘not if, but when’ but the reality is now ‘not when, but where next’.

      Mr White is clear that visible neighbourhood policing is the basis for helping identify and tackle crime, including terrorism. He said: “Prevention is better than cure. We know the information to stop these mindless attacks exists within communities and great work is being done to forge strong, valuable relationships to capture this. But it cannot be jeopardised by reducing the contact the police has with the public. Neighbourhood policing – bobbies on the beat, if you like – has never been more important.”

      He praised the efforts of all those involved in the response to the attack, including the public, adding: “While the emergency services, as always, ran towards danger and did what they do best, so too did the people of Manchester, who offered help in countless selfless acts of kindness. This dogged resolve to unite in the face of adversity is what makes this nation great.”

      “We cannot lose focus on the challenge ahead – and that is ensuring we have a resilient fully-resourced police service, capable of not just reacting to contain a terrorist outrage but also acting to prevent atrocities in the first place.”

      This could be the election game changer and stop Theresa’s Terror Surge in its tracks.

      But Corbyn is the No-where Man. Is there a logical explanation.
      I can’t come up with one.

    83. ronnie anderson says:

      Rev is that Ikea moving intae the Dice’s market ( dont aw yous Wings pedants jump oan me ) lol.

    84. Brian Doonthetoon says:

      Hi Dan Huil.

      RE: Oor Wullie. This is from:-

      http://www.grouchos.co.uk/Dinna-ask.html

      “A member of Groucho’s staff found the following note attached to the toilet door at a Sepultura gig at Q.M.U. in Glasgow –
      ‘If I were Paw Broon I’d be suspicious of the fact that none of my children look like me or each other (except the twins of course, whose resemblance to Oor Wullie demands an explanation from Maw Broon)’.”

    85. MJT says:

      I never got over the tragic break up of the Rock and Roll Dog Turds. They really had it man. But when they lost their singer it was all over. Such a shame.

    86. Proud Cybernat says:

      I say Biffa Bacon was the best ever Viz character. Can someone please disagree with me and propose someone else. Then we can all sit back and watch as Risible suddenly appears and steps in to milk the dispute, encouraging disagreement.

      Walloper!

    87. Morgatron says:

      Stu, they should have had a Reg on Independence article.

    88. Johnny says:

      The Drunken Bakers are excellent. Bleak as hell, but excellent.

      Biffa Bacon and Roger Mellie class as well (the Viz seemed to tell a few tales about the celebrity world without naming names in the latter cartoon).

    89. Paul Wilson says:

      Postman Plod was my favourite since I was a Postie at the time Oh the fun we had when things were mark “Fragile”

    90. Just heard on rScotland, ‘Lord Plunket’ speaking about information leak.
      Did he not have secrets of his own that leaked?
      Where and why do they dig them up from? Why is his comment relevant?

    91. Thepnr says:

      Never once read Viz, by the comments I guess I might have missed something.

      Maybe not though as the characters I’ve read of so far all actually appear to be real in today’s climate, so maybe I’m just watching the live version.

    92. Dan Huil says:

      Brian Doonthetoon

      Maw Broon’s hot! [She has a website: Maws I’d like to ….]

    93. Robert Graham says:

      albertascot – good points from the police , i think you answered your own question of where is Corbyn , who controls the media ? , this government and the tory party , who controls them Murdoch .

    94. stu mac says:

      @Joe of the Coutts
      ==========

      These were by the great Dudly D. Watkins and originally published I think as a serial in Peoples’ Friend. Later were republished in the Topper – I remember King Solomon’s Mines in colour. I also came across around the same time the original B&W picture stories of Robinson Crusoe bound into a single volume in the local library. I would have been 9 or 19 then.

    95. heedtracker says:

      Roger Mellie the man on the tellie was classic Viz, so hope he’s still on the go. He was based on a real man on the telly, say the writers, who had the pleasure of observing the tv star off air. He had loads of great tv prog ideas, like the Bristol Maze, don’t ask, and Shit in a Bucket, where celebs climbed a step ladder and had to shit in a bucket, or no worse than watching BBC Scotland’s endless and horrendous SNP bad fare.

    96. chris kilby says:

      Nicola Sturgeon and her Unfeasibly Large Mandate!

    97. geeo says:

      Hot and a bit bored, so decided to converse with ‘scottish’ labour candidate for Linlithgow and Falkirk East, Joan Coombes, ex deputy of Falkirk Council this last 5 years.
      …….

      @Joan Coombes (again).

      You say you are a member of The SCOTTISH Labour Party.

      Could you possible post on here where and how someone can JOIN The Scottish Labour Party please ?

      I have checked the Electoral Commission and cannot find such a Party registered with them

      Why are you trying to deliberately trying to mislead voters in Linlithgow and Falkirk East ?

      You are not fit for public office when you feel it is ok to lie to the electorate.
      …………..

      I tried finding The Scottish Labour Party in HERE…to no avail.

      Party Constitution » Our Party » The Labour Party
      https://www.labour.ie/party/constitution/
      ………..
      Undaunted, i dug deeper, and found THIS….

      Labour Party Rules | rulebook | constitution
      http://www.labourcounts.com/constitution.htm#3

      Clause 3 was a revelation….(CAPS are MY emphasis)
      ……….

      Clause 3 – The Party’s Financial Scheme

      1 The party has adopted and registered with the Electoral Commission a financial scheme, whereby the party consists of a central organisation and separate accounting units.

      2 THE FOLLOWING SHALL BE ACCOUNTING UNITS UNDER THE FINANCIAL SCHEME:

      (a) CLPs

      (b) THE SCOTTISH LABOUR PARTY

      (c) Wales Labour

      (d) the National Organisation of Labour Students (‘NOLS’)

      (e) the Association of Labour Councillors (‘ALC’)

      (f) the Trade Union and Labour Party Liaison Committee and the Regional Liaison Committees

      (g) the Parliamentary Labour Party (‘PLP’).
      …………..

      So, there it is, unequivical PROOF that ‘Scottish’ labour is in fact, AN ACCOUNTING UNIT.

      With this in mind, how can you, Joan Coombes (or indeed anyone else) become a member of a party which even the labour party states is actually an accounting unit, not an ACTUAL political PARTY, an assertion SUPPORTED by the Electoral Commission ?

      Over to you, Joan.
      ………
      This one is filed under, ‘dont hold your breath’.

    98. HandandShrimp says:

      The psychotic Parkie was a favourite of mine and I take it Jeremy is a Modern Parent.

    99. Dave McEwan Hill says:

      Walter Scott at 3.13

      If we insist in calling Ruthie Fat Boab we have no complaint if the they shout Wee Jimmy Crankie at Nicola

    100. heedtracker says:

      Sid the Sexist really made me larf too. And then Black Bag, he lives on, the pathos, everytime its my turn to take out the rubbish. Sid The Sexist was almost certainly based on your average Murdoch or Dacre hack.

      In other words, Viz could only work in a country like England plagued by such a bunch of creepy sleazy shits that own and run UK msm.

    101. HandandShrimp says:

      Dave

      That is a fair point (although I didn’t know we were calling her that. What happened to Kim Il?)

      Nats call May and Co names and Yoons call Nicola and others names. In so far as that goes that is standard rough and ready politics. There is a fair bit of name calling in England between May and Corbyn supporters too.

      However, we should be honest in our dealings. Be clear in who you favour and what you stand for. The nurse thing is a case in point. Don’t pretend to be an honest broker if you favour one side and your social media makes it clear that you favour that side. Don’t go on the radio or TV and try to fool the public by playing the concern troll. It will come back to bite and it will hurt the wider movement (be it Nat or Yoon).

      People will be emotional at times and names will be called but always be true to what you believe and treat the readers or listeners with respect.

    102. chris kilby says:

      Kezzy Fuckwit.

      (Sorry.)

    103. Robert Peffers says:

      @Dave McEwan Hill says: 25 May, 2017 at 6:27 pm

      “If we insist in calling Ruthie Fat Boab we have no complaint if the they shout Wee Jimmy Crankie at Nicola”

      What do you mean, “IF,”Dave?

    104. gerry parker says:

      Paul Wilson at 4:41.

      Yes – and “Photographs do not bend”

      Oh yes they do.

      🙂

    105. Big Phil says:

      Was it not Daphne Broon that took Oor Wullies’ innocence ?,Im sure
      I saw a cartoon strip in the 70’s, it was up the Stoorie brae and Fat Boab wis last oan if memory serves me right. lol

    106. Capella says:

      Finbar Saunders and his double entendres.

    107. Derek says:

      @HandandShrimp

      Jurassic Parkie? Aye, totally ace! No plot, just a guy getting angry and swearing at stuff. Think he still makes an occasional appearance.

      I like an occasional Viz.

    108. stu mac says:

      @stu mac
      ===============

      Diddy! You mean 9 or 10. Watch the keyboard!

      Mind you I did read a lot of comics well into adult life. (and even to this day)

    109. Croompenstein says:

      The worlds greatest superhero.. Brown Bottle

      http://viz.co.uk/brown-bottle/

    110. Nana says:

      O/T

      Tax Specialist Richard Murphy describes the looming crash ahead for the UK after GE2017, and the myth of a ‘strong and stable’ conservative government

      There’s going to be a lot of people who vote for Theresa May who will deeply regret it’

      http://therealnews.com/t2/index.php

    111. mr thms says:

      I’ve just watched a party political broadcast on Channel 4 on behalf of the Labour Party.

      This is the first party political broadcast I have seen, that is clearly about the General Election.

      The party political broadcasts on BBC Scotland and STV don’t mention Westminster or UK issues..

      Why is this????

    112. Rock says:

      Putin is less of a danger to the wellbeing of the people of the UK, incorporating North Britain, than Saint Theresa of England and Wales.

    113. Rock says:

      I meant the “plebs” of the UK.

      Saint Theresa is indeed a saint for the elite.

    114. Chang Sha says:

      @geeo
      In your search for the Scottish Labour party you inadvertantly looked through the Irish Labour party website
      https://www.labour.ie/party/constitution/
      Even if an actual SLAB existed, you’d never find anything about it there

    115. Ian Mackay says:

      I loved the letters page in Viz.

      It had classics like:

      Why waste money on expensive personalised registration plates?

      Simply change your name by deed poll to your existing registration plate.

      Sincerely,
      YT12 RLV

    116. AlbertaScot says:

      Not that I’m being trying to be sexist or anything but there’s something I’ve been noticing about the TV images of Task Force Theresa.

      There seems to be a peculiar number of smaller stature squaddies keeping Britain (Scotland and NI excluded, of course) strong, stable and terrorist-free.

      Many with tightly-furled hair buns poking out the back of their berets.

      So are these genuine lethal force sodgers? Or service battalion folks packing around the SARs?

      No doubt there a lot of women who can handle themselves in a tight situation and I have nothing but admiration for them.

      But still, is something going on here?

    117. Dave McEwan Hill says:

      I bet they didn’t come up with the idea for waterproof dentures

    118. Scott says:

      O/T.
      A Labour minority administration is to run West Lothian Council – even though the SNP has more local councillors.

      Where is Jim Murphy these days he always told us the largest party was the winner.

      Not a lab fan but in some ways the Tories can’t say that under Corbyn the country’s security would be in danger not after what has happened in Manchester.
      I am not trying to make politics out of Manchester my thoughts are with all the families and I hope nothing like this ever happens again

    119. justin F.N. minty says:

      O/T who goes on bbc politics scotland hys, a lot of yooners post links to the times ect and post pish about snp with very little reply from us guys.

      so if some of you top bloggers could post a few links that might just influence a few votes for us

      you have to take on the enemy head on sometimes

      thanks JFNM

    120. geeo says:

      @chang sha

      Lol…so i have…anyhoo..the same applies to the uk labour party constitution, i have actually previously checked..

      Good spot though.

    121. Brian Powell says:

      Extraordinary hearing of the Labour/Tory deals, they gathered no lessons from the last 5 years. I remember seeing the Slab Conference where they said they would see the SNP off at the GE then on to the Council elections, where the SNP would be whacked.

      Neither happened.

    122. geeo says:

      My delightful new bestie,labour candidate Joan Coombes, has finally responded to me !!

      To inform me that the SG has FULL powers over banning fracking and that there is ZERO mechanism to refer an appeal to WM should the SNP ban fracking outright.

    123. geeo says:

      She is less forthcoming about what legislative vehicle was used to deliver this absolute power and what exact date it became into being at holyrood.

      Perhaps she is away to ask someone…

    124. carjamtic says:

      Re: Earlier Post

      Murdo’s precious Willie is of course Willie Henderson a fine player,by all accounts who,may or may not have been the subject of a bid from Real Madrid ?.

      Famously a Mr R Nesbitt from Newcastle got an Andy Cole tattoo in the famous black and white strip,just before the player got sold.

      A final little piece of football trivia,Rangers played Benfica in the 1972 Eu. Cup. Winners Cup,the match was tied after the 2 legs,Benfica won the resultant penalty shoot out

      After checking the rules the ref had mucked up,Rangers had won on the away goals rule,went through and won the competition.

      (Football historians can correct me if I am wrong,as it is indeed a funny old game).

      #Stein,Busby,Shankly,Ferguson

    125. Jamie says:

      I know the viz are not expected to be reliable for politics but northern Ireland can’t vote Labour, TORY or libs. I was expecting something like the queen instead.

      Welsh tourist board, that’s a good one.

      At least they have enough sense to realise that in Scotland there’s no point voting anyone else as they are gash.



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