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No jocks please, we’re British 222

Posted on April 13, 2014 by

One of the great things about this site’s sky-high viewing figures is that on the rare occasions when we might be, for example, out having a walk in the park to get over the crushing disappointment of somehow losing yet another Scottish Cup semi-final, our ever-vigilant readers will remain alert.

Otherwise, we might have missed this.

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Misleading advertising 52

Posted on April 13, 2014 by

The pitch:

btclydebank

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No That’s What I Call Music 56

Posted on April 13, 2014 by

We’re off to watch the Scottish Cup semi-final now, so to keep you all entertained for the next couple of hours here’s a little something we put together at the request of columnist and broadcaster Lesley Riddoch, and for anyone who was listening to Radio Scotland’s “Headlines” this morning.

Hopefully we won’t need it ourselves by 3.30pm. #COYR

The not-so-iron bar 224

Posted on April 12, 2014 by

Even Sparta’s mythical iron-bar currency – specifically designed, so legend had it, to shackle the economy by being too heavy to buy or trade anything – was marginally better, in Alistair Darling’s view, than anything an independent Scotland might be able to use for money, all of which will lead to inevitable doom.

ironbars

Because Scotland, as all good unionists know, is the only country in world history for which there is no currency option that will work at all.

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The mushroom farm 162

Posted on April 12, 2014 by

Have you seen the film of the coronation? I’m not talking about the grand televised extravaganza in Westminster Abbey with the young Queen Elizabeth done up like a wedding cake – I mean the Scottish coronation, in Edinburgh, three weeks after the glamorous London ceremony of 2 June 1953.

It’s not easy to locate. You’ll struggle to find a picture of it, or even a documented reference – a brief casual mention squeezed in right at the end of this article on the monarchical website is the best we could do.

honours

Acting on the advice of her ministers, Elizabeth attended the ceremony dressed in an ordinary coat and hat. The honours of Scotland were presented to her, and she held them as if they were volatile explosive devices, standing stock-still until they were taken back again by be-gowned flunkies. 

There would be no actual official crowning. It might give the natives ideas.

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Sowing seeds 110

Posted on April 12, 2014 by

Dear Scottish women,

It seems that we’re letting the side down a bit here. If the same percentage of us were willing to vote Yes as the men, we’d be home and dry come September 18th, living in a nuclear-weapon-free democracy for the first time in our lives. But it seems like a lot of us are either not convinced or haven’t begun thinking about it yet.

sowingseeds

I don’t believe it’s the former: anyone genuinely looking at the arguments, not to mention the behaviour of those on both sides of the debate, could hardly fail to be convinced that independence is a good thing. So I’m guessing it might be the latter.

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The sunshine coach 64

Posted on April 12, 2014 by

thesunshinecoach

Keep ’em coming 189

Posted on April 11, 2014 by

We didn’t do a stats post at the start of April (still just under 4m pageviews a month, if you’re curious) but when someone tweeted these figures this morning we thought they were worth a wee toot, because they’re more than just nice news for us.

alexavs

They’re from the independent web-traffic analysis site Alexa.com, and they detail the relative rankings for the seven biggest dedicated Scottish politics sites on the web.

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A new society 86

Posted on April 11, 2014 by

The last batch of data from our Panelbase poll concerns social attitudes, away from directly party-political issues. We did a whole bunch of these last time, with a mixture of predictable and unexpected results, and Scots had a surprise or two for us again.

thechanges

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Neither national nor collective 114

Posted on April 10, 2014 by

It’s late, but we couldn’t let this one pass.

nhstogether

Heavens, where do we start?

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Voices of nationalism 171

Posted on April 10, 2014 by

We’ve had these sitting around for a few days without getting round to posting them, but as we’re currently knee-deep in the last tranche of data from our Panelbase poll, it seemed as good a time as any to clear the decks.

First up in the ambiguously-named Posterotron is the “respectable” face of British nationalism, in the form of UKIP European-election candidate David Coburn.

Easy, ladies.

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They talk a lot of wind 108

Posted on April 10, 2014 by

There’s a wonderful opening paragraph in today’s Courier that we’ll quote in full:

“The UK’S Energy Secretary has accused the SNP of employing ‘negative politics of fear and bullying’ as he warned bills could rocket by as much as £189 a year in the event of independence.”

That virtuoso display of Olympic-class irony from Mr Davey was part of the latest fearbomb from the No camp – Nick Clegg’s plea for a “Sunshine Strategy” apparently having been a casualty of Lord Robertson’s “cataclysm” – in the shape of yet another “Scotland Analysis” report from the UK government insisting that every single aspect of Scottish independence would be comprehensively and unequivocally disastrous.

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    • Captain Caveman on The Party Of The Dead: “Southwest Scotland would be awesome 🙂 Sadly though. It comes down to tax. I’m about to go for early retirement…Aug 12, 10:15
    • Captain Caveman on The Party Of The Dead: ““Bald Eagle” 😀 Love it. Hand me the Pledge and dusterAug 12, 10:13
    • TURABDIN on The Party Of The Dead: “security, war & collateral damage futures, a stock that never fails…certainly worked in Iraq. But first you must destroy &…Aug 12, 08:53
    • gm on The Party Of The Dead: “Well spotted Turabdin. The Ruling Class.Aug 11, 22:05
    • James on The Party Of The Dead: ““….Who is the pathetic twat?” Still you, Bubba.Aug 11, 21:10
    • Hatey McHateface on The Party Of The Dead: “Generally speaking, TURABDIN, in our culture, we don’t expect the offspring of anybody to be held accountable for the sins…Aug 11, 21:06
    • Hatey McHateface on The Party Of The Dead: “Isn’t that how to deal with a fatberg? Divide it into smaller lumps that can then be individually flushed.Aug 11, 20:56
    • Aidan on The Party Of The Dead: “What useful activities do you spend your day doing that you can be “diverted” and “distracted” from?Aug 11, 20:40
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    • Young Lochinvar on The Party Of The Dead: “HMcH I suspect it was the Diet Coke supplies that got hardest hit. He’s a fan apparently.Aug 11, 19:36
    • Young Lochinvar on The Party Of The Dead: “Well hold on there Bald Eagle! True. I uncharacteristically missed that one 🙂Aug 11, 19:31
    • James on The Party Of The Dead: “Well said, diabloandco. Those 4 Yoon trolls are endless. Here all day, every day to divert, distract and divide. As…Aug 11, 19:29
    • Aidan on The Party Of The Dead: “Have you thought about moving to South West Scotland? It’d be nice to get some more English voices into the…Aug 11, 19:21
    • James on The Party Of The Dead: “What a fucking clown you are, Adrian. You keep good company. Cue the SP.Aug 11, 19:20
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    • Captain Caveman on The Party Of The Dead: “*margarita even 😀 Jeez, what a typo… don’t want Fatso to think I’m holding a French white daisy for him…Aug 11, 17:21
    • Oneliner on The Party Of The Dead: “Gordon Brown had a black-windowed cavalcade of Range Rovers when he went to his ‘How To Save The Union’ meeting…Aug 11, 17:17
    • Captain Caveman on The Party Of The Dead: “I’ll be sure to do so too, just for him – marguerite in hand. 😀Aug 11, 17:16
    • Aidan on The Party Of The Dead: “He probably hasn’t twigged that you’ll still be able to post on the internet, exactly as today, from another location…Aug 11, 16:58
    • Stevie on Anatomy Of A Grift: “Mentally ill, delusional, perpetually-victimhood-angry, self-righteous = dangerousAug 11, 16:43
    • Captain Caveman on The Party Of The Dead: “No, no Aidan, I’m actually quite touched that Fatso would give me his life savings to help move out. :)…Aug 11, 16:39
    • Aidan on The Party Of The Dead: “lol as if you have £20 JamesAug 11, 15:45
    • James on The Party Of The Dead: “Means ‘not you’.Aug 11, 15:20
    • James on The Party Of The Dead: “£20 towards your moving expenses, no problem. Just say the word. Good riddance.Aug 11, 15:18
    • Aidan on The Party Of The Dead: “Some of this “analysis” borders on being absurd and is clearly written from the standpoint of another agenda. – Nobody…Aug 11, 15:04
    • Hatey McHateface on The Party Of The Dead: “Somebody would have had to count the pies and sandwiches, etc, before and after. If it’s the same employee that…Aug 11, 14:29
    • Hatey McHateface on The Party Of The Dead: “I guess the imperial nationalist Scots aren’t “True Scots”, what with being brainwashed and all. If they might be concerned…Aug 11, 14:20
    • Captain Caveman on The Party Of The Dead: “I daresay even an airport catering truck is preferable to, say, a luxury campervan paid for with embezzled funds. 🙂Aug 11, 14:14
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