Only a few diehards in the press are still clinging this morning to the Labour fiction we exposed yesterday, namely the flat-out empirical falsehood that “the biggest party gets to form a government” in the event of a hung Parliament.
As that’s where Scottish Labour is led from, of course. The Ashcroft polls leaked late last night have, it’s fair to say, caused a certain degree of furore among politics types.
Contrary to some expectations, the figures could scarcely have been worse. Of 16 seats polled – 14 held by Labour and two Lib Dem – 15 would go to the SNP on staggering swings of over 20%. Labour’s Glasgow heartlands would be all but wiped out, with only Willie Bain in Glasgow North East barely clinging on.
The SNP will undoubtedly be cock-a-hoop, but will almost certainly also be feverishly warning activists that polls don’t win seats and reminding them of the party’s own spectacular recovery in the 2011 Holyrood election from what looked like disaster just a couple of months out from the vote.
Lord Ashcroft himself points out (as we did ourselves on Twitter last night) that the seats he polled were mainly in areas that voted Yes last year, and so may be unduly flattering the SNP. But it’s worth seeing them in context.
Remarkably, 26% of people planning to vote Labour in May, and an astounding 54% of likely Tory voters, say the SNP are the best guarantors of more powers, while 21% of Labour voters and 37% of Tories also answer “SNP” to the second question.
We wouldn’t want to be in Scottish Labour’s shoes if they were made of diamonds.
We pondered long and hard over how best to analyse Scottish Labour’s bewildering, oh-my-God-they’re-really-calling-it-that “Vow Plus” fiasco from yesterday, readers.
We contemplated noting the absurdity of Gordon Brown being its frontman when he’s not standing in May and won’t be in Parliament to deliver it. We considered a forensic deconstruction showing how it’s just the same old reheated, uncosted rubbish they’ve been waffling around for the past years.
(“Give Holyrood control of housing benefit, separating it out from the rest of the UK’s Universal Credit by mumble mumble! Increase pensions using the extra cash freed up by mumble mumble! Devolve workfare, which somehow magically ‘creates jobs’ by mumble mumble! Pretend we just said ‘1000 nurses’ all along, not the demented ‘1000 more than anything the SNP say’!”)
We thought about pointing out all the comical flapping the party’s done around its devolution proposals, presenting the weary and confused Scottish people with feeble, grudging, underwhelming plan after feeble, grudging, underwhelming plan – at least five different ones since 2009 – and resentfully upping the offer by the bare minimum they think they can get away with every time.
And we wondered if it was worth drawing attention to the fact that the latest effort is actually basically the Strathclyde Commission blueprint from the Conservatives with a red sticker hastily slapped on it.
But in the end, the truth is a lot simpler than that.
We haven’t done a monthly stats post for a few months, partly because naturally traffic’s been down after the insane spike of last September, partly because we had two weeks off in October (and a semi-break over Christmas and New Year), and partly because we’ve moved to new, more accurate and more detailed figures direct from our webhost and January was the first full month of them.
So here, for those of you who like to keep track, are the headlines:
We’re pretty blown away by that, to be honest. A tiny fraction shy of 300,000 unique readers (in what’s traditionally a very slow month for politics, and one we didn’t really start until the second week) is 157% up on a year ago, and nearly 50,000 higher than last May, which was the all-time high until the mad last few weeks of the referendum campaign. (It’s the 3rd-highest ever, after September and August 2014.)
If you’d told us we’d be anywhere near those sorts of numbers four months after a No vote (or indeed if we’d even still be going four months after a No vote), we’d have said you were missing a few marbles. But as long as you’re still here, we will be too*.
Since we’ve been talking about mad letters from Scottish Labour MPs today, we’re sharing this one with you too. We’ve been trying to make sense of it all evening.
We haven’t made any progress. It’s not just a simple accidental transposition of words, because if you switch “increased” and “decreased” around it’s still gibberish – why would the threat have decreased because of proliferation? If anyone can explain it, do drop us a line.
With a knife-edge general election just 90-odd days away, we must confess ourselves surprised at the sudden rash of candour/indiscipline (depending on how generously you want to frame it) that’s broken out in Scottish Labour.
It started soon after the referendum, when Edinburgh Labour chairman Trevor Davies felt confident enough, with the vote won, to announce on an officially-backed Labour website that his primary loyalty was to his party rather than to the people of Scotland, under the startlingly blunt headline “Labour first, Scottish second”.
But any notion that the comments represented nothing more than a vainglorious and momentary slip from a loose cannon were soon dispelled.
Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “Well Scots withdrew them from Westminster. This will be SNPs first real test at Holyrood. The last Holyrood election was…” May 4, 10:12
Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “See AI Dan, this is why yer thick as shit. GERS figures are based on CURRENT spending habits of being…” May 4, 09:44
James Che on Seven Days Too Long: “It would not take many Scottish elections to reduce and eventual delete Colonialism , faster than the mandates given to…” May 4, 09:18
James Che on Seven Days Too Long: “Scotland simply removes the Colonial political parties from Scotland wether they are english registered and at the same time remove…” May 4, 09:02
diabloandco on Seven Days Too Long: “1. ote Counting: Each party’s total votes are counted. 2. Initial Quotient: For the first seat, each party’s quotient is…” May 4, 08:57
James Che on Seven Days Too Long: “The Farage Fear Factors, What about the batshit crazy green goblins,” May 4, 08:51
James Che on Seven Days Too Long: “Curious to see how how the vote count for SNP could hold a majority successful outcome if people in Scotland…” May 4, 08:46
Aidan on Seven Days Too Long: “Feel free Geri, to post a link to the high quality and detailed analysis which shows that an independent Scotland…” May 4, 08:01
Aidan on Seven Days Too Long: “What a pleasure it is to wake up to yet another rabies-induced psychotic rant from Geri. Quite frankly how her/it…” May 4, 07:53
Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “Who is saying we’ll be billions in debt after independence? What do we owe? Zero. Who do we owe it…” May 4, 02:39
Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “Just a suggestion but I wonder if AtLS has ever reached out to Phantom Power to work together? They used…” May 4, 00:50
Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “To lock out other independent parties. Sturgeon boasted herself, live on telly, she’d rather work with yoons than with Alex…” May 3, 22:35
Mark Beggan on Seven Days Too Long: “The Farage Fear Factor, Trump Derangement Syndrome. The Tit Whisperer, Dirty Filthy Labour and Queers for Terrorists. Yes indeed. The…” May 3, 22:12
sarah on Seven Days Too Long: “2016 SNP list vote gained NIL seats. 2021 SNP list vote [over 1 million of them] gained 2 seats. If…” May 3, 21:58
Geri on Seven Days Too Long: “They’re as thick as shit. No wonder the Eppy class shafts them. Dumb doff capping serfs only have the attention…” May 3, 20:53
Iain More on Seven Days Too Long: “Get a life yah toxic wee Sassanach Troll” May 3, 20:04
Aidan on Seven Days Too Long: “No Insider is right Alf, James Cheyne has lost the plot” May 3, 19:34
Mark Beggan on Seven Days Too Long: “These people that told you this are they still in your head?” May 3, 19:31
Mark Beggan on Seven Days Too Long: “When you are right and everyone else is wrong usually means a mental breakdown. How’s the sex change going?” May 3, 19:19
Iain More on Seven Days Too Long: “It is a waste of time asking for a Section 30. Scotland isn’t going to get one whatever. The Yoons…” May 3, 19:05
James Che on Seven Days Too Long: “I have always liked the unionist on here as they are so helpful in making my post entertaining when they…” May 3, 18:57
Mark Beggan on Seven Days Too Long: “Raising a glass of fine malt single whiskey to Graham Linehan. A soldier in the war against evil.” May 3, 18:54
James Che on Seven Days Too Long: “As I mentioned these records of the non- union with Scotland can be researched and checked out, The dummies are…” May 3, 18:50
twathater on Seven Days Too Long: “Unfortunately for you James Che makes more sense with her contributions than you ever did with your constant support for…” May 3, 18:06
Izzie on Seven Days Too Long: “Just back from deliveting SNP both votes leaflet. Knocked them in. People seem to have forgiven (forgotten) campervangate? and Alex…” May 3, 18:06
Insider on Seven Days Too Long: “Alf Baird 3:25 Aye, you and “James Che” certainly made a good pair ! Is that the sound of wedding…” May 3, 16:35
Alf Baird on Seven Days Too Long: ““lost the plot” No so; James has merely confirmed what we all know, and as Liberation Scotland and Professor Robert…” May 3, 15:23