The Labour Party’s current state of euphoric hubris about losing another election is at least partly explicable. Jeremy Corbyn increased his party’s 2015 vote in England and Wales by a thumping 40%, took the highest vote share of any Labour leader since 2001 (beating Tony Blair’s 2005 victory by five points), the highest actual vote since Blair’s 1997 landslide, and deprived the Tories of their overall majority.
Those achievements are tempered by the fact that while Corbyn vastly overperformed expectations and certainly gave Theresa May a bloody nose (and might well end up depriving her of the Prime Ministership once her party gets a challenger together), the morning-after reality is that Tory rule has been extended to at least 2022 – by which time Corbyn will be 73 – with the nasty hangover of the empowerment of the DUP.
(With both Labour and Corbyn personally now leading in the polls it’s pretty much impossible to see the Tories losing a vote of confidence which would trigger another exemption to the Fixed-Term Parliaments Act. Any new election would very likely lead not only to a Labour government but to a Jeremy Corbyn Labour government, a prospect to chill even the most rebellious Tory into meek and sober compliance.)
But it would be churlish to dispute that Corbyn has put Labour in its best position for nearly 20 years. The same is emphatically NOT true of Scottish Labour, which hasn’t stopped the Scottish media from desperately trying to pretend otherwise.
Brexit is already a shambles. Everyone south of Manchester is unhappy because it’s too suffocatingly hot to move, and everyone north of Manchester is unhappy because they’ve not got the sunshine. We could all, for various reasons, do with a chuckle.
So without further ado, readers, enjoy the “clueless metropolitan hacksplaining” hit of the summer: Kezia Dugdale, Comeback Queen.
…which we felt it important to preserve for posterity lest anything happen to it. We’d charitably blame it all on the Telegraph, who made it, were it not for the fact that the Scottish Conservatives have posted it on their own Facebook page.
The spanking new issue of Viz, which is totally still a thing, is out today at all good newsagents. The cover promises a “FANTASTIC FREE VOTING AID” inside, and we thought you’d be at least mildly and fleetingly amused by the Scottish aspect. Of it.
Pop out to the shops and buy a Viz*, readers. (Or subscribe to try three issues for a mere £1.) It’s just as funny as it used to be but much less popular, so it’s cool again.
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*Wings Over Scotland has no connection to Viz or Dennis Publishing Ltd and has received no inducement for this endorsement. Although we’re open to offers.
(NB The media is understandably mostly occupied today with the horrific events in Manchester. But life goes on – music websites are still talking about music, football websites are still talking about football, videogames websites are still talking about videogames. Any rational observations about terrorism made here would be screamed down as making political capital from tragedy. So let’s get on with the day job.)
If you apply to go on a televised political debate and then submit a question to ask a national leader, it seems a reasonable deduction that you want that issue to be raised and discussed. If you also make it personal by describing your own circumstances, it seems logical that you’d want those circumstances to be widely publicised, and to be asked about them so you could say more and tell your story to the country.
So it’s a bit odd that Edinburgh nurse Claire Austin has suddenly gone off the radar.
We’re not going to join in the attacks on a nurse who criticised Nicola Sturgeon during last night’s BBC election debate. While her lifestyle seems at a glance to be wildly at odds with her claim that she relied on foodbanks to survive, there are – genuinely – possible explanations for at least most of it.
Owning a convertible car isn’t proof that someone’s wealthy – I have one myself that’s worth less than £1000, and I also have a relative who has very little money but who nevertheless owns a horse just like Claire Austin’s daughter seemingly does. (It’s also possible to be quite poor but still own things you bought when you were less poor.)
It ill befits Yes supporters – who are happy to deploy the existence and growing use of foodbanks to justifiably attack the UK government – to complain if someone who calls the First Minister “wee Jimmy Krankie” adopts the same tactic. More to the point, we entirely agree with Ms Austin’s core view that nurses should be paid more in general, as we suspect most people do.
(And in Scotland, of course, they ARE paid more than in the rest of the UK, and under the SNP have always been given the full pay rises recommended by the independent pay board, which hasn’t been the case in England.)
But that still leaves some things hanging disquietingly in the air.
She’s currently contesting Edinburgh West, which the party has some credible hopes of winning, having held the seat for almost 20 years prior to 2015. And it seems that her former employer has decided to try to give her a helping hand.
And, y’know, they’re really not allowed to do that.
Something really quite strange happened yesterday. The Prime Minister of the United Kingdom was caught red-handed in the act of telling a bare-faced, unarguable lie in the middle of a general election campaign, and nobody cared.
Reacting to the Crown Prosecution Service decision not to prosecute dozens of Tory MPs who’d broken the law in getting elected in 2015, the PM offered up a quote, which was reported in most of the newspapers:
Nice wee bit of snark on “all the major parties, and the Scottish nationalists” there. But there’s a slight problem with the statement, which is that it’s an absolute lie.
Most of the papers today are full of stories screaming hysterically about a (real, but somewhat exaggerated) decline in Scottish educational standards. But if the contents of those papers are anything to go by, Scotland’s schools have been disgorging idiots into the general population for a lot longer than the last 10 years.
He’d very kindly sent us a copy of the same article he’d sent the Beeb. We attach it below. We’ve highlighted in bold the only bits that didn’t make it into the BBC piece.
David Holden on When the law breaks the law: “Perhaps we should be running a crowd funder for the world’s greatest living half Greek former prince who has fallen…” Feb 20, 16:07
sarah on When the law breaks the law: “@ Mark Hirst: I donated when you first opened the crowdfunder and will do so again. I note that the…” Feb 20, 15:55
Hatey McHateface on When the law breaks the law: “Well, well! Grudging respect to Professor Baird. Precisely as predicted by Fanon, Memmi, et al, the linguistically colonised YL has…” Feb 20, 15:08
Hatey McHateface on When the law breaks the law: “Hasn’t the world’s greatest living half Scot, President Donald Trump, defunded that useless, toothless talking shop and safe haven for…” Feb 20, 14:38
Young Lochinvar on When the law breaks the law: “HMcH Eh? Sorry, no idea what you’re talking about. Have you been indulging in self-trepanation again..” Feb 20, 14:35
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on When the law breaks the law: ““The Act of Union at least protected the Scots legal system” ? ————- Worth listening again to the seminal speech…” Feb 20, 14:22
dearieme on When the law breaks the law: “All this is a powerful argument against devolved Scottish government. Scrap the bloody thing, it’s failed. The Act of Union…” Feb 20, 13:27
Hatey McHateface on When the law breaks the law: “Great stuff, Northy. I’d heard of galactic clusters. Now you’re teaching me about galactic clusterfucks.” Feb 20, 12:07
Northcode on When the law breaks the law: “Chris Wormald… former Cabinet Secretary for Great Britain, UK, and England recently replaced by: Dame Antonia Rebecca Caroline Angharad Catherine…” Feb 20, 11:39
McDuff on When the law breaks the law: “Donated. Best of luck Mark as you have been severely wronged and the thugs that targeted you need to be…” Feb 20, 11:20
Northcode on The Future Is Yesterday: “The past is tomorrow… not least because us humans insist on repeating history, and with not a single lesson ever…” Feb 20, 11:17
Hatey McHateface on When the law breaks the law: “Aye, Alf, I guess if the only tool in your armoury is a spoon, every situation must look like a…” Feb 20, 10:48
Alf Baird on When the law breaks the law: ““The case we’re discussing here is entirely home grown” Don’t be silly. Despite the inevitable ‘on-the-ground indigenous agents'(Elkins) operating in…” Feb 20, 10:37
Hatey McHateface on When the law breaks the law: “There’s something about Fanon makes my hair curl.” Feb 20, 10:28
willie on The Future Is Yesterday: “Rejected by the electorate in the constituency but then perchance a seat at the top of the regional list. Why…” Feb 20, 10:23
Andy Wiltshire on When the law breaks the law: “I’m cheering them on, but no doubt someone will explain that it’s all just something straight out of post-colonial theory…” Feb 20, 10:05
Hatey McHateface on When the law breaks the law: ““Movie”, YL? You’re colonised and you don’t even know it.” Feb 20, 08:46
Young Lochinvar on When the law breaks the law: “Anyone else reckon Bain’s heid has a similar(ish) profile to a movie Predator? Just without the odd breathy way of…” Feb 19, 22:36
robertkknight on When the law breaks the law: “Pay day next week…standby! The alphabets and their party connections are no secret. Nor indeed their motivations. They still enjoy…” Feb 19, 22:01
agentx on When the law breaks the law: “O/T – but the Mens’s curling team are through to the final – guaranteed at least a silver medal and…” Feb 19, 22:01
Hatey McHateface on When the law breaks the law: “You were on fire, Willie, until your second last para. Then you crashed and burned. The case we’re discussing here…” Feb 19, 18:40
Hatey McHateface on When the law breaks the law: “We’re only a few weeks out from choosing Scotland’s government for the next 5 years. Surely it’s not too much…” Feb 19, 18:31
Willie on When the law breaks the law: “As is now clear to see the rule of law is a hoodlum’s charter. When the state can maliciously try…” Feb 19, 18:18
Effijy on When the law breaks the law: “I’ve donated as we must when faced yet again by corrupt and immoral practices from government. Your courage is remarkable…” Feb 19, 18:12
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on When the law breaks the law: “Not sure whether or not a video link to Fergus Ewing’s Holyrood intervention is embedded in the above article, but…” Feb 19, 17:51
ScotsRenewables on When the law breaks the law: “I;ve donated a tiny amount, and am pleased to see that the appeal is going well – is there any…” Feb 19, 15:04
Hatey McHateface on The Future Is Yesterday: “It’s a good day to bury news, whether bad, or just awkward. Plaid Cymru has dropped its pledge to get…” Feb 19, 14:37