We received two emails today, just a few minutes apart. There are a couple of notable things about them. The first came from Claire Somebody at the Crown Office.
The second one, even more thrillingly, came from Service Advisor 1989847 at Police Scotland, which we assume is some sort of advanced crime-fighting robot.
In one of those emails, readers, is a three-word phrase that raised our eyebrows just about right off our heads. Before we chat any more, see if it jumps out at you too.
Crown Office and Procurator Fiscal Service
25 Chambers Street
Edinburgh
EH1 1LA
4 June 2026
.
Dear Chief Constable and Crown Office,
RE: REQUEST FOR CRIMINAL INVESTIGATION — ALLEGED
MISAPPROPRIATION OF RING-FENCED POLITICAL DONATIONS
I write to request that Police Scotland/COPFS open a criminal investigation into the alleged misappropriation of funds donated to the Scottish National Party (SNP) on the basis that those funds would be held and applied for a specific, designated purpose.
If you subscribe to the theory that it’s better to fight 100 duck-sized horses than a single horse-sized duck, the SNP is knocking it out of the park today.
Because the papers just can’t make their minds up about the biggest story with which to attack John Swinney’s beleaguered party.
You’ve had a few pretty gruelling pieces to get through in the last week or so, readers, so here’s something a little more light-hearted.
It’s from an episode of Broadcasting Scotland on 27 November 2020, a month after we confirmed our big story about the SNP accounts and the missing fundraiser money. In it, snug-toed SNP MP Pete Wishart opines that there really is nothing to worry about, and we should all just put our trust in the party.
We’ll leave you to judge whose opinion stood the test of time.
On Sunday, Nicola Sturgeon told Laura Kuenssberg that the SNP’s accounts “went up and down” as her excuse for not noticing that hundreds of thousands of pounds had suddenly vanished from them overnight.
Several things leap out immediately from that clip.
One, there absolutely very much WAS “something glaringly suspicious in the accounts that I should have seen” – the party she led had raised almost £700,000 in two “ring-fenced” fundraisers that wasn’t there any more, which ought to have made its leader at least mildly curious.
And two, attempting to fob responsibility off onto the independent auditors simply won’t wash. It’s not their job to determine whether the SNP has kept its political promises or not, their job is simply to match up money coming in against money going out and produce a set of numbers to show what it all adds up to. It makes no odds to them if it was spent on a party conference, a fancy motorhome or a 50-foot golden statue of Danny La Rue. All they can see is numbers.
But even leaving those things aside, if we’re going to learn anything about how The Great Indyref Swindle got to this calamitous point unchecked we need to examine just how hard Nicola Sturgeon had to look the other way to fail to see what was going on literally under her nose and literally in her own back yard.
To tell you the truth, readers, we’re suffering from a little bit of option paralysis at the moment, although happily not in the same way Peter Murrell is.
The endless torrent of revelations following on from Murrell’s conviction a week ago isn’t just fascinating in its own right – it also forces numerous historical issues to be seen in a new light. At any given second there are half-a-dozen different articles we could be writing, but also so many to read that it’s hard to find the time.
We suspect this matter is going to run and run all through the summer silly season because there are simply so many angles and so many unanswered questions.
Sadly, this turned out to be prescient this morning.
Laura Kuenssberg did give Nicola Sturgeon an uncomfortable time in their interview on her Sunday programme on BBC News, but when confronted with the one gaping open goal that Sturgeon has no answer for – and even when Sturgeon TWICE set it up on a plate for her – Kuenssberg failed to knock the ball into the empty net.
That doesn’t – by some distance – mean there was nothing of interest to note, though, so let’s take a walk through (the first instalment of) what was said.
Now that Nicola Sturgeon is finally free of her gruelling MSP workload, which could give her anything up to two extra hours of spare time a week, she might like to start making a proper dent in the contents of her fully-loaded bookshelves.
The multi-statement meltdown that has been the unravelling of Nicola Sturgeon this week has been quite something to behold. Last night, for example, we swear our Twitter feed presented these two tweets one after the other.
GM on The Interesting Words Round: “Plenty on here leapt to shutdown suggestions of external actors. Some of them like to slide in Alec Salmond’s name…” Jun 5, 22:52
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on The Interesting Words Round: “A recurrent assertion on recent Wings threads is that Scotland’s constitutional crisis is “home-grown”. However, the structurally flawed devolution settlement…” Jun 5, 22:51
Alistair on The Interesting Words Round: “It’s the Crown Office that have advised the police that it has already been investigated. The response was coordinated.” Jun 5, 22:45
Graham Fordyce on The Interesting Words Round: “Your response: Following your investigation, please confirm whether Police Scotland considered there was sufficient evidence and, if so, whether a…” Jun 5, 22:44
Northcode on The Interesting Words Round: “This has the dodgy fingerprints of the The Bureau, SIS, MI5, MI6, CI5, Bodie and Doyle, Jim Prideaux, Toby Esterhase,…” Jun 5, 22:38
Daisy Walker on The Interesting Words Round: “SSPCA, Scottish Water and Gas Companies are some of the organisations that can conduct their own criminal enquiries and submit…” Jun 5, 22:10
Alf Baird on The Interesting Words Round: “I recall the Rev previously may have implied that ultimate responsibility for Police Scotland (and perhaps also COPFS?) sits not…” Jun 5, 22:05
Andy Wiltshire on The Interesting Words Round: “Send both again, explaining that you only received anonymous replies from both agencies the first time.” Jun 5, 21:51
Steve Ashton on The Interesting Words Round: “Which comes first? Scottish Public Services Ombudsman … or Judicial Review?” Jun 5, 21:37
Fiona on The Interesting Words Round: “I can only presume Police Scotland has Alzheimer’s. “My wife has advised me I’ve had my tea, but I don’t…” Jun 5, 21:22
Gordon Hay on The Interesting Words Round: ““have been advised” – if by COPFS, as seems perfectly plausible, then the wagons are well and truly circled.” Jun 5, 21:05
Oneliner on The Interesting Words Round: “Of course they are. ‘We have been advised’ that Willie McRae ‘committed suicide’.” Jun 5, 21:05
Calum on The Interesting Words Round: “This absolutely fucking stinks to high heaven. They really are going to brazen it out, aren’t they?!” Jun 5, 20:54
Stephen on The Interesting Words Round: “Yes 😉 I bet no further investigation is required because the party already declared the funds spend on general party…” Jun 5, 20:53
Southernbystander on The Lord Of The Rings: “Yes I daresay these are aspects one would have more of a handle on from growing up and living in…” Jun 5, 20:47
Jeannie McCrimmon on The Interesting Words Round: “Scotland’s morphed intae 1970s East Germany.” Jun 5, 20:42
David G on The Interesting Words Round: ““had already been” – superfluous use of the pluperfect” Jun 5, 20:41
Sylvia on The Interesting Words Round: “Submit a SAR for a copy of the advice received from? regarding your complaint submitted yesterday.” Jun 5, 20:35
Dick Wall on The Interesting Words Round: “So can I suggest asking for a judicial review of the advice giving agency.Those who donated money to the funds…” Jun 5, 20:33
Al Harron on The Interesting Words Round: “How on the hell can they say they’ve completed an investigation into statements that were made within the last week?…” Jun 5, 20:32
john h williams on The Interesting Words Round: “Very strange that only the second e-mail has an official stamp on it and that no one has a full…” Jun 5, 20:26
