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Answers without words 167

Posted on January 02, 2016 by

We tweeted this proposition last night (the quote comes from a blog post yesterday by Scottish Labour madcase and all-round comedy relief Ian Smart):

rdfm

We thought you might enjoy some of the responses as much as we did.

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Not getting over it 312

Posted on December 12, 2015 by

A strange phenomenon we’ve remarked upon a few times since the independence referendum is the inexplicable undying rage of a certain subset of Unionist voters.

Having won the vote, a casual observer might expect them to be happy, but instead they appear to exist in a constant state of fury.

(Our own best guess is that they were expecting to triumph by a crushing margin of two or three to one – some fretted that it might only be a 20-point victory – and then suffered the double blow of a much closer result that kept the Yes movement very much alive coupled with a massive surge in SNP membership and support.)

smart28

A demented anti-SNP tactical-voting campaign for this year’s general election – led by, among others, a frothing ultra-Loyalist-nutter-type by the name of Andrew Skinner – recorded one of the most spectacular failures in history as the Nats captured 56 out of 59 Scottish seats, only narrowly missing the other three, and the party’s poll ratings have continued to rise since then.

So this week, Mr Skinner decided to try for a more manageable target.

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A tale of two situations 107

Posted on November 30, 2015 by

To mark the day that we both appeared in the Herald’s “Power 100” list of “The leading Scots who shape our lives” – and she had another go at trolling us – we’d like to dedicate this wonderful tune sincerely to the popular children’s author JK Rowling:

We’ll try to understand her problems more sensitively in future.

Why we love Twitter 408

Posted on October 29, 2015 by

Kezia Dugdale in the Scottish Daily Mail this morning:

“We’re not like the SNP. This isn’t a party of robots that are given a chip and told what to think.”

Twitter’s response is below.

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That happened quietly 165

Posted on October 21, 2015 by

The Scotland Office is unexpectedly no more.

ukgfs

It’s had an unannounced rebranding as “The UK Government For Scotland”.

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Person swears on internet 425

Posted on October 19, 2015 by

Nation’s political journalists shocked.

fo1

More “news” at 1pm, 6pm, 10pm10.30pm, etc, etc, etc, etc.

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A cautionary tale 250

Posted on September 21, 2015 by

So today we read this:

pfearjp

And it was good.

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The lesser of two stupids 673

Posted on September 01, 2015 by

Let’s start off by losing some more friends. This site has no time for the Gaelic lobby. The obsolete language spoken by just 0.9% of Scotland’s population might be part of the nation’s “cultural heritage”, but so were burning witches and replacing Highlanders with sheep and we don’t do those any more either.

Being multilingual is an excellent thing, but the significant amount of time and effort taken to learn a literally-pointless second language (because everyone you can talk to in Gaelic already understood English) would be vastly better directed to picking up one that was actually of some use, and every extra fraction of a second spent scanning a road sign trying to find the bit you can read is a fraction of a second spent with your eyes off the road.

Non-primary native languages are a tool whose main utility in practice is at best the exclusion of outsiders, and at worst an expression of dodgy blood-and-soil ethnic nationalism. They’re a barrier to communication and an irritation to the vast majority of the population, who are made to feel like uncultured aliens in their own land.

But we’d still rather put up with Gaelic than complete idiots making our laws.

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The new binary 254

Posted on August 31, 2015 by

We can’t help feeling there’s a simpler way of putting that.

brightgreen

The suicide note 220

Posted on August 16, 2015 by

Earlier today Gordon Brown gave a speech in London, on a subject and for reasons which are unclear. It was widely trailed in the press, however, as an intervention in the Labour leadership campaign, with the particular goal of stopping Jeremy Corbyn from winning. It was – naturally – broadcast live and in full by the BBC News channel.

Corbyn wasn’t mentioned by name so far as we noticed, but to tell the truth we drifted in and out of the rambling, 49-minute, 30-page monologue full of celebrity namedrops and unconnected anecdotes, hypnotised as we were by Brown’s relentless pacing up and down the room like a caged animal.

Nobody who isn’t getting paid should have to endure the entire grimness of it, so using the magic of technology we’ve compressed it all down to a mere fraction of its length (just 20%) for you, but without losing any of the tone, content or intellectual nuance.

We offer it to you as an elegy. It marks the day that Labour reanimated the walking corpse of the only person left in the party that it considers to have any gravitas – not to win an election, but to try to crush the first man in living memory to enthuse tens of thousands of new members to join a political party in the hope of restoring the values it was created to uphold.

It is the day the soul of the Labour Party finally died.

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You may also enjoy 138

Posted on July 31, 2015 by

We couldn’t help but smile at the related tunes.

vnbrc

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A little bit of history, repeated 106

Posted on July 25, 2015 by

These pages from the 14 March 1998 issue of NME (just 10 months after the election of Tony Blair’s first Labour government) are a fascinating historical document.

nmedps1tn

They needed saving. So we found them and we saved them.

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    • Mark Beggan on Anything But That: “Yes you did. In fact Hatey everyone now sees you as a dirty old man sitting in his Ford Cortina…Sep 10, 12:42
    • Mark Beggan on Anything But That: “He may have been given bad advice but I think his bottle crashed. Alistair Darling! A snake in the grass…Sep 10, 12:29
    • Confused on Anything But That: “a govt which prioritised its own citizens welfare would not suffer this https://archive.ph/GImrN – we would be on long term…Sep 10, 12:10
    • Mark Beggan on Anything But That: “Thanks Spartan 117. I try my best. I agree Hatey and James are a pair of sad old bastards. I…Sep 10, 12:08
    • Confused on Anything But That: “from their own mouths, the carpetbaggers are happy, and that’s all that matters https://archive.ph/v8vz1 – unstated, but you can read…Sep 10, 12:07
    • Mark Beggan on Anything But That: “Bronze age tripod. That is interesting. What would that be for? Are you detecting on specific areas? Historical sights.Sep 10, 11:58
    • sam on Anything But That: “James, I hope this is of interest to you. Across Europe from 16th century the petition was a means of…Sep 10, 11:49
    • Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: “Ah, c’moan noo, Spartan. Ye’ve goat a wee touch o’ green aboot ye cos naeboady’s paying ye fer yer posts.…Sep 10, 11:26
    • Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: “I can envisage a few Indy scenarios that don’t entail mutual co-operation with England. Every one of them is catastrophic…Sep 10, 11:21
    • Spartan 117 on Anything But That: “James, Hatey and Mark displaying they have nothing else in their empty lives to do than sit on here all…Sep 10, 11:15
    • Captain Caveman on Anything But That: “Che spambot in full flow, I see. Give it a bloody rest, will you?Sep 10, 10:02
    • Colin Alexander on Anything But That: “My gut instinct is that the YES campaign was deliberately designed to fail. I suspect that pressure was also applied…Sep 10, 09:46
    • Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: “I made no comment about my personal life, James. 🙂Sep 10, 09:42
    • James Che on Anything But That: “Hatey, I don’t think anyone enquired about your’e personal life.Sep 10, 09:17
    • Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: “Much like dogging.Sep 10, 09:08
    • James Che on Anything But That: “Hence my interest in researching historical records, maps, buildings, old battles and history in general began,Sep 10, 09:03
    • James Che on Anything But That: “Forgot dozens of horse shoes and tools, A interesting hobby because its like a lucky dip, some days you come…Sep 10, 08:36
    • James Che on Anything But That: “Did I find any thing interest? Yes I suppose depending on what a person is interested in, every thing from…Sep 10, 08:30
    • Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: “Man, must be 35 years since I last opened some embassies. Happy days. But glad I stopped.Sep 10, 08:14
    • Mark Beggan on Anything But That: “Duncan MacTrump says; Currency: That was the question that sunk Big Eck. Great guy, treated very badly by very nasty…Sep 10, 02:36
    • Mark Beggan on Anything But That: “Does Scotland have any legal right (As the law now stands) to open embassies?Sep 10, 01:47
    • Mark Beggan on Anything But That: “Metal detector? Find anything interesting?Sep 10, 01:25
    • James Che on Anything But That: “I personally think that John Swinney and Andy Burnham have a lot in common in how they run Countries.Sep 10, 00:55
    • James Che on Anything But That: “As the Devolved governance parliament in Scotland from Westminster parliaments “Scotland Act,” The Westminster parliament has every right to launch…Sep 10, 00:47
    • James Che on Anything But That: “I see the Telegraph is suggesting that Andy Burnham is running the parliament similar as a boy Scout leval.Sep 10, 00:37
    • James Che on Anything But That: “In a attempt to give you more meat on the bone, I will have to refer you to the Westminster…Sep 10, 00:32
    • Hatey McHateface on Anything But That: “Naw, Alf. In as much as neoliberalism has an agreed definition at all, its meaning has nothing to do with…Sep 9, 23:16
    • Mark Beggan on Anything But That: “You are dribbling your Buckfast.Sep 9, 23:07
    • Mark Beggan on Anything But That: “I respect that James. But it is too high brow, technical, academia land. We plebs need meat on the bonesSep 9, 23:05
    • Alf Baird on Anything But That: ““the basic point of neoliberalism” and of course liberal imperialism and its colonial procedures. A colonized people suffer from territorial…Sep 9, 21:38
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