In a post last month we referenced a ZX Spectrum computer game from 1984 called “Worse Things Happen At Sea”. Today as we watched the First Minister on the Andrew Marr Show, we were put in mind of another nautical-disaster-themed one from a great deal nearer to the end of the Speccy’s life.
Newspaper sales figures in Scotland now come out in a patchy and unco-ordinated sort of way, with different frequencies and at different times of year, so we thought it’d be worth collecting them together for easy reference.
The numbers below are the most recent figures for each title that we know of – for papers classed as “national” that means November last year, and for those counted as “regional” (which includes the Scotsman and Herald titles) it’s this month.
Figures have all been rounded to the nearest 100, and increase/decrease stats refer in all cases to the corresponding sales for one year previously.
It’s been a fair few months since we last documented the Daily Record’s increasingly panicky attempts to save its own hide over its infamous eve-of-referendum “Vow”.
In its growing desperation, the paper bizarrely turns today to First Minister Nicola Sturgeon, demanding that SHE should be the one to fulfil a promise that the Record made specifically in order to thwart Sturgeon’s lifelong goal of independence.
There’s an extraordinary article in the Daily Record today. Here’s a bit of it:
Alert readers might feel that a few lines have gone missing somewhere between paragraphs four and five. And the fact that they have has nothing to do with dead football clubs, and everything to do with the dying Scottish media.
We don’t follow many Unionists on social media, because you end up wasting your day arguing pointlessly with a lot of people who are never going to change their minds and getting in a bad mood. But we’re told they were all very excited about an article in yesterday’s Daily Record.
Penned by the paper’s political editor Davie Clegg, it’s a long diatribe about how the fall in oil revenues has created a black hole which now means Scotland is – stand by for a surprise! – too wee and too poor to be independent.
So far so meh – it’s not like it’s the first time we’ve heard that record played, after all. But as you can see from the image above, there’s also quite an interesting challenge printed in giant capitals at the foot of the page. We’re not in the Scottish Government, but it’s a rainy Saturday so we thought we might have a go.
The newspaper is a fantastic concept. A cheap, accessible product, it’s a brilliant way of keeping yourself broadly abreast of current affairs. You turn a page and are presented with a diverse selection of interesting stories, often on subjects you’d never have thought to go and seek out in the self-refining echo chamber of the internet.
(Theoretically links on websites serve the same purpose, but dodging “sponsored” advertorial, gutter-level clickbait, pop-ups, autoplay video and pages that judder and leap around so much while loading all this rubbish that you’re about 50/50 to have an epileptic fit before you can read the story, has made clicking on one into a game of Russian Roulette fewer and fewer people are willing to take a chance on.)
This site has never believed that the ongoing steep decline in newspaper sales is a fundamental problem with the format. Rather, the truth is that people stop buying papers because they’re full of garbage.
All five of the opinion pollsters who regularly poll on Scottish politics (Panelbase, YouGov, TNS, Ipsos Mori and Survation) have now published surveys in the past two weeks asking the independence question. So it seems reasonable to expect there’ll be no more polls before the anniversary of the referendum on Friday.
Given the conventional wisdom that the economy, underpinned by that pesky volatile oil, was the main reason not enough Scots could be persuaded to take the leap into self-government, readers might expect that the dramatic collapse in the oil price since last year (when we checked today it was trading at just over $47 a barrel, less than half the $97 it was at the start of September 2014) would only have cemented voters’ feeling that they made the right decision.
You might not think it, readers, but even after all this time we’re still capable of a certain degree of innocent, naive trust in Scottish journalism.
When Nicola Sturgeon didn’t just issue a boilerplate condemnation at FMQs yesterday after ludicrously overblown allegations of Twitter “trolling” by an SNP candidate, but went on the counter-attack over Labour’s grotesquely abusive Ian Smart, we foolishly thought that might make both sides of the story newsworthy.
And then we opened the papers.
We don’t expect the media to be impartial. But let there today officially be an end to even the slightest pretence that it’s at least fair, professional and honest.
Young Lochinvar on The Marshalling Plan: “I wonder; does this article not just inadvertently illustrate what a Machiavellian/ Heath Robertson mess the DHondt voting system (that…” Feb 3, 07:48
Cynicus on The Marshalling Plan: “Rev. Stuart Campbell says: 2 February, 2026 at 9:28 pm “Never become a full-time Musical Chairs professional.” ======= Or a…” Feb 3, 02:27
Skip_NC on The Marshalling Plan: “NaeNeed@5:02pm, this election is about casting a vote for independence. Voters can choose whomever they like on the constituency ballot,…” Feb 3, 02:06
Cynicus on The Marshalling Plan: ““Bogey the game is.” -======== From the word order does either Yoda or Fearghas think in Gaelic? ‘’S e taibhse…” Feb 3, 02:02
dan macaulay on The Marshalling Plan: “I get it, and it’s a no brainer, that I will vote for ALBA on the regional list. But otherwise,…” Feb 2, 22:43
willie on The Marshalling Plan: “When Swinney was the sole candidate to stand for election as party chief another candidate came forward. That candidate it…” Feb 2, 22:11
Nae Need! on The Marshalling Plan: “As if, who would have it. Pauline and Hatey KISSING UP A TREE.” Feb 2, 22:01
Nae Need! on The Marshalling Plan: “Aidan says: 2 February, 2026 at 7:42 pm @RevStu I think you’re being unfair, all you need to do is…” Feb 2, 21:53
Rev. Stuart Campbell on The Marshalling Plan: “Never become a full-time Musical Chairs professional.” Feb 2, 21:28
Hatey McHateface on The Marshalling Plan: ““How about Venus, Jupiter or Mars?” Or that planet, light years away, the Picts came frae. Colonising cants. Nae wonder…” Feb 2, 21:19
Nae Need! on The Marshalling Plan: “AgentX Hm, You ARE a conundrum, I like you, So, you never feel differently on the day? But why on…” Feb 2, 20:54
Nae Need! on The Marshalling Plan: “Oh my gawd, Ian, listen to yourself. Mind you, thanks for the laughs 🙂 And you’ve fair made my day,…” Feb 2, 20:47
Insider on The Marshalling Plan: “That tool for predicting the number of seats is addictive! Just a few more points lost by the SNP and…” Feb 2, 20:40
100%Yes on The Marshalling Plan: “Doug, If this man would betray his own country then why would he resign? Make no mistakes about the people…” Feb 2, 20:37
Cherrybank on The Marshalling Plan: “I think Craig Houston the You- tuber has a good chance of getting elected on the Glasgow List vote.” Feb 2, 20:29
Scot Finlayson on The Marshalling Plan: “WHY WOULD ANYONE IN THEIR RIGHT MIND VOTE GREEN nobody in their right mind votes green. As Churchill said ish,…” Feb 2, 20:13
Nae Need! on The Marshalling Plan: “I DON’t KNOW, ANDREW SCOTT, WHY WOULD THEY?” Feb 2, 20:03
Nae Need! on The Marshalling Plan: “Skip, “there will be only seven pro-independence MSPs, ie, from Alba alone.” Negate this from your mind. And focus. NOMINALLY…” Feb 2, 19:45
Aidan on The Marshalling Plan: “@RevStu I think you’re being unfair, all you need to do is vote SNP a wee bit more and then…” Feb 2, 19:42
100%Yes on The Marshalling Plan: “For every vote you don’t give to the SNP and give to someone else the SNP has to find two…” Feb 2, 19:33
Rev. Stuart Campbell on The Marshalling Plan: “”I’m no fan of the SNP and didnt vote for them in 2021, but anyone who supports independence and votes…” Feb 2, 19:26
agentx on The Marshalling Plan: “No I never feel differently on the day – why on Earth should I?” Feb 2, 19:21
Andrew scott on The Marshalling Plan: “WHY WOULD ANYONE IN THEiIR RIGHT MIND VOTE GREEN” Feb 2, 19:10
Skip_NC on The Marshalling Plan: “100% Yes, I should have thought it was obvious that I do not see the SNP (or Greens, for that…” Feb 2, 19:09
Young Lochinvar on Shield Of The Phantom: “Indeed James Bauge is slated for mention, not least as heir apparent Chooky Clarence getting the chop there started the…” Feb 2, 19:08
Nae Need! on The Marshalling Plan: “One of the things I find interesting about this: Unionists (with insight) recognise the ‘placeholder value’ of the masquerading SNP…” Feb 2, 19:07
Nae Need! on The Marshalling Plan: “Sorry, but can I just say as an afterthought – Doug, whether Swinney resigns or not is almost a moot…” Feb 2, 19:01
Nae Need! on The Marshalling Plan: “So you say, you may feel differently on the day.” Feb 2, 18:50
Nae Need on The Marshalling Plan: ““Maybe an anglo-centric Reform-led government installed on a very low tournout will shock politically complacent Scots into realising the necessity…” Feb 2, 18:48