Because almost nobody in Westminster, whether they’re politicians or the media, ever pays any attention to anything outside SW1A, Alex Salmond’s comment in London yesterday that the SNP would vote against any Tory government in the event of a hung Parliament – which to any Scottish person was news as surprising as a weather forecast for rain – has been greeted with seemingly-genuine shock and horror.
Reporter after reporter has treated the non-revelations (which have been official SNP policy for as long as we can remember, and were stated explicitly by Nicola Sturgeon in November) as a stunning bolt from the blue, and Tory politicians and the right-wing media alike have burst into frothing, spluttering rage, based on the fact that apparently none of them grasps how either the UK electoral system or basic arithmetic work.
We’ve had to illustrate this piece with a tweet from our old chum Duncan Hothersall, because at the time of writing the Scottish Labour account on Twitter has no mention of Labour’s “five point plan”, and nor does the branch office’s website.
And the reason for the absence of any more information is probably that the “plan” is another example of a Labour policy that looks like a tasty boiled egg until you crack its shell and discover that there’s nothing inside.
Respect to John MacKay of STV, who on last night’s Scotland Tonight asked Labour MSP James Kelly the question this site has called for about whether Labour would stand aside and let the Tories rule if the latter were the largest party after May’s election, but Labour had enough seats to win a confidence vote and form the government with backing from the SNP and/or other parties.
Kelly, unsurprisingly, flapped and blustered and totally evaded it. But then we doubt he has the authority to make the tea in Scottish Labour, let alone speak for the party on key policy issues. If the question isn’t put repeatedly by all of the media to more senior Labour figures until an answer is produced, we’ll be wanting to know why.
Here’s Ed Miliband, giving a speech this morning to literally at least 20 Labour MPs, Labour MSPs, journalists and possibly a stray member of the public who accidentally walked through the wrong door in Clydebank, a place where Labour leaders used to address gatherings of thousands.
Unusually, Miliband took a few questions from the hacks, all of whom promptly wasted the opportunity by lobbing completely pointless softballs about coalitions and deals, all of which (a) have been asked a hundred times already, (b) were rendered moot by Alex Salmond on the Marr show yesterday, and (c) were only ever going to be batted away non-committally.
So here’s an actually worthwhile one they can ask instead next time.
We have to give Jim Murphy credit – on this week’s Sunday Politics he started off with the subtle, misleading but technically-accurate version of Labour’s line about the “biggest party forming the government”, which involves making the true but irrelevant observation that in the past it’s usually been the case. (Mainly because UK elections almost always give the biggest party a comfortable majority.)
But it only took a couple of minutes of questioning for the Scottish branch manager to lose his cool and resort to the comprehensively debunked flat-out lie again.
We thought you’d enjoy this clip from this morning’s Andrew Marr Show, readers. It came after a very sensible interview, in which Salmond had calmly and reasonably laid out the SNP’s view on events should there be a hung parliament this May with the former First Minister’s party holding the balance of power.
Tory minister Anna Soubry seems to be experiencing a degree of regret about having begged Scots to stay in the UK. The body language says as much as the words.
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: “Aw, dinna be like that, James. I’ve yet to run this past Northy, but I’m verra confident he’ll agree to…” Nov 7, 21:52
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: ““Does this ring a bell” Sure. Reminds me of some of the posts on here within the past 24 hours.…” Nov 7, 21:40
James on Vibecoding A Better World: “And you, ‘maestro’, are the visible proof of this. All day, every day, sadly.” Nov 7, 20:41
James on Vibecoding A Better World: “Pretty obvious now that the ‘name’ previously masquerading as a Scotsman and independence supporter [“Northcode”] was in fact the “Site…” Nov 7, 20:37
James Che on Vibecoding A Better World: “Hatey, Shutting down the questioner, shutting down the discorse, shutting down the narrative. This was planned reactions of the CIA…” Nov 7, 20:20
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: ““We explicitly refuse to accept content or articles written or generated in full or in part by AI or LLMs”…” Nov 7, 20:20
James Che on Vibecoding A Better World: “Feargas MacFhionnlaigh, Do you know the reasons that the Banks funded The Womens Liberation Movement? 1: Because the Banks realised…” Nov 7, 20:06
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on Vibecoding A Better World: “Bella Caledonia Statement on Artificial Intelligence « As a publisher and a space for creativity, we should be clear that…” Nov 7, 19:41
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: “Last words on the McAlpine – Baird debate. 1. It was a debate between two people holding to different views.…” Nov 7, 19:31
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: ““Prof. Baird came over as a gentleman,Robin as a cunt” Looks like we have another definition from the Snowflake’s Pretendy…” Nov 7, 19:17
Minceheid on Vibecoding A Better World: “There was an article of McAlpine’s a few months ago which really didn’t sit right with me. I forget the…” Nov 7, 19:05
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: “@Alf Baird says: 7 November, 2026 at 9:50 am “oppression” As it happens, Alf, you can read about some real…” Nov 7, 18:11
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on Vibecoding A Better World: “PARENTS REPORTED TO SOCIAL SERVICES FOR NOT ‘AFFIRMING’ GENDER-CONFUSED CHILDREN Parents have warned that they are being reported to the…” Nov 7, 18:07
CatalogueTrewsers on Vibecoding A Better World: “I’ve been reading Robin McAlpine on and off for over a decade. Feel as if I saw his true colours.…” Nov 7, 18:02
Aidan on Vibecoding A Better World: “Unfortunately a lot of the stations in Scotland are unbarriered. I also sense that unlike “James” who is likely to…” Nov 7, 16:57
Captain Caveman on Vibecoding A Better World: “@Alf In that case, why don’t you actually “seek the remedy” (in any meaningful, pragmatic, instructive and substantive sense) instead…” Nov 7, 11:00
Captain Caveman on Vibecoding A Better World: “Take heart, Aidan. There’s no way Confused would make it past the station barriers. I realise public transportation isn’t what…” Nov 7, 10:32
Alf Baird on Vibecoding A Better World: “Only once ‘a people’ truly understand their oppression will they urgently seek the only remedy: https://salvo.scot/scotlands-colonial-status/” Nov 7, 09:50
James Che on Vibecoding A Better World: “The Treaty of union between Scotland and England parliaments never concluded to its end date, the progression being halted by…” Nov 7, 09:43
James Che on Vibecoding A Better World: “The parliament of England did not cease to exist, it was transferred in its last session into the new brand,…” Nov 7, 09:32
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: “Again, Northy, you’re missing a key piece of the jigsaw. For £150 billion PA, Brussels will take all these petty…” Nov 7, 09:31
Northcode on Vibecoding A Better World: ““What’s your plan for governing Scotland after independence, Alf?” “£150 billion per year.” “Right… but what about trade, international relations,…” Nov 7, 09:10
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: “@Northy I don’t think that’s a complete summary. You must also channel your inner Theresa May: Decolonisation means Decolonisation. And…” Nov 7, 08:58
Northcode on Vibecoding A Better World: ““What’s your plan for achieving independence, Alf?” “Liberation.” “Right… and how do you deliver liberation?” “Decolonisation.” “Okay, and what does…” Nov 7, 08:29
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: “Before you self-identify, MH, impress upon her that nay means nay. Maybe try ketamine a few times too. I hear…” Nov 7, 08:27
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: “Thanks for the link, Fearghas. At least we can now listen to it for ourselves. Up to now, all we’ve…” Nov 7, 08:11
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: “An unfortunate side effect of pre-booked, pre-allocated seating. In the old days, regular travellers developed a “sixth sense” that helped…” Nov 7, 07:59
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: “Busy week, Confused? The evidence of this post suggests you’ve defo had something on your mind the entire time. If…” Nov 7, 07:50
Hatey McHateface on Vibecoding A Better World: “Well then, that’s something, Connie. There’s few on here ever graduated from the primary school playground. Take the comment above…” Nov 7, 07:36
Minceheid on Vibecoding A Better World: “Hatey McHateface says: 6 November, 2026 at 12:49 pm I’d be a bit more specific than “horse” if I were…” Nov 7, 07:33
