Back in the 1980s there was a hit game for the ZX Spectrum home computer called Worse Things Happen At Sea. In it you play a robot whose job is to get a heavily-laden cargo ship safely to port, except that more and more disasters keep befalling it.
It springs leaks, it veers off course, the engine overheats and the robot’s power runs down, until eventually the catalogue of catastrophes overwhelms the harassed metallic custodian and the boat slides down into the murky depths.
We wonder if that feels familiar to anyone at the moment.
On 23rd March this year, after Alex Salmond was found not guilty of 13 criminal charges in the High Court, I called on the Scottish Government to set up a judge-led inquiry into the allegation that he had been the subject of a conspiracy involving the Scottish Government, which resulted in him being accused of criminal behaviour.
There’s an especially interesting post on the blog of Scottish solicitor-advocate Gordon Dangerfield at the moment, pointing out that there are no legal reasons whatever for the Crown Office and Procurator Fiscal Service (COPFS) to be withholding documents relating to the allegations against Alex Salmond, and indeed issuing dire threats of prosecution against him or anyone who might put them into the public domain.
(All of the blog’s coverage of the inquiry in general has been expert and revealing, and should be the first stop for readers seeking to understand proceedings.)
The items in question include the infamous WhatsApp messages exchanged by the group of people attempting to have Salmond imprisoned for crimes he didn’t commit, among them SNP chief executive Peter Murrell.
When two of Murrell’s messages were leaked recently it was front-page news in the Scottish press, and generated a huge amount of subsequent coverage. Commentators as diverse as Mandy Rhodes of Holyrood magazine and Alex Massie of the Times and Spectator have noted that while they’d initially disbelieved talk of a conspiracy, the Scottish Government’s actions have given them the opposite impression.
The message log is absolutely central to Salmond’s claim of a conspiracy against him, so the last thing that either COPFS or the leadership of the SNP wants is for it to become public knowledge. Indeed, COPFS has denied that the messages exist at all, which makes it a bit weird that the police are currently conducting a serious criminal investigation into who leaked some apparently entirely imaginary documents.
So it would be quite astonishing if they suddenly disappeared, wouldn’t it?
Readers, we can’t tell you how much we want to get back to just dissecting Scotland’s hopeless Unionist media for a living. It’s a lot more fun than what the current political circumstances are obliging us to do, so you can hardly imagine our excitement when we spotted what looked like an open goal in yesterday’s Mail On Sunday.
Our ears pricked up immediately at the sight of the words “up to”, which is invariably a sign of dodgy doings on the way, and so it proved. The article contained no solid data at all about the size of Scottish Government special advisers’ pay rises, only how many SpAds there were and which general pay bands they were in, each of which spans a wide range of between £14,000 and £23,000.
But while the Mail had spooned the sitter six feet over the crossbar – because the crude spin they’d put on it was total rubbish – there was still a loose ball just waiting to be knocked into the back of the net.
The SNP’s earth-shattering 2011 majority election victory, which paved the way for the 2014 independence referendum, dropped a bomb on Scottish politics.
What few people realised at the time was that it was also going to set up a series of massive paydays for one of Scotland’s wealthiest demographics: lawyers.
SNP Members For Independence? What a ridiculous phrase – surely every member of the SNP is in favour of independence, right?
That’s mostly true of course, but the leadership and many elected representatives of the party appear to be intent on repeating the failed Section 30 route to independence, and also on restricting serious debate about alternative strategies.
It seems that a revised “Plan B” may be discussed at the party conference, still almost two months away, and for all Plan B’s merits it is seriously flawed and its inclusion at the expense of alternative and better plans at conference would merely pay lip service to the term “serious debate”
Something clearly needed to be done, which is why SNP Members For Indy has been set up. So what’s it for and what is it trying to do?
We’re very busy today writing more FOI requests and the like, so we’ll just take a brief moment here to note that hiring super-expensive lawyers to object to the questions you’re being asked DEFINITELY sounds like the behaviour of people who are keen to co-operate fully and in the most transparent way possible with an inquiry:
Having been privileged to serve as SNP National Treasurer, I’m aware of the duties that go with the post. Of course, it’s changed in some ways since then due to the scale of the party, the resources available and even technology. The days are long gone when Joan Knott, who has sadly since passed away, required to take a taxi down to my legal office to have cheques signed between court or clients.
But some things still remain fundamental, and in particular providing annual accounts for the party. That has been done for 2019, in the administrative sense, but what’s missing is their publication and provision either to the NEC or the party more widely.
For sure there’s been no conference but there are other bodies and other ways of making them available to party members. At NEC, conference and indeed anywhere else, members were entitled to see them and question me. It was their right to see them, and it remains so now. So why haven’t they seen them?
A column on a Sturgeon-loyalist indy website that we read yesterday has been mildly annoying us ever since, and in the interests of open debate (but mainly because it’s cold and grey and rainy outside and we can’t go out and feed the swans) we thought it was worth taking half an hour to walk through it a little and explain just why it’s such a dangerous piece of fantasy nonsense.
But first here’s one of said swans. She’s about five months old and her adult feathers are just starting to come through. Isn’t she lovely?
In case things get a bit rough later we’ve got some squirrels and a really fat dachshund as emergency backup, so buckle in.
The comments from committee convener and SNP MP Linda Fabiani (we guess she must be another of those MI5 plants/secret Unionists) are really quite extraordinary. In terms of Parliamentary language they’re only a hair’s-breadth short of an invitation to step outside and settle things with an old-school dust-up in the car park.
Northcode on Seven Days Too Long: ““You’ve got to be aware that the teasing of the English is the Scottish sense of humour and there’s no…” May 1, 12:32
Alf Baird on Seven Days Too Long: “Most countries sensibly impose restrictions on foreign ownership of property/land especially where this would tend to disadvantage the indigenous population,…” May 1, 12:24
Angry Weegie on Seven Days Too Long: “Be careful what you wish for. Five years of a unionist majority could do untold damage to what remains of…” May 1, 12:22
ALANM on Seven Days Too Long: “What would really shake them up at Holyrood is if everyone pissed off with the state of Scottish politics went…” May 1, 12:12
Angry Weegie on Seven Days Too Long: “My choice in the constituency is SNP or one of 5 English based unionist party candidates. Isn’t it wonderful being…” May 1, 12:10
TURABDIN on Seven Days Too Long: “SCOTLAND does not need more WASPS on mobility scooters.” May 1, 11:58
Aidan on Seven Days Too Long: “@Alf – isn’t that basically why anyone moves anywhere?” May 1, 11:42
Alf Baird on Seven Days Too Long: “As Albert Memmi wrote, the colonizer only moves to a colony ‘for an easier life’ and ‘to make a profit’.…” May 1, 11:19
Aidan on Seven Days Too Long: “Yup – the insanity of the current SNP policy to incentivise working people to move south and retirees to move…” May 1, 10:55
100%Yes on Seven Days Too Long: “I seen this article, “I’m one of thousands leaving England to live in Scotland” am I the only one who…” May 1, 10:44
Alf Baird on Seven Days Too Long: ““the land that time forgot” A valid point, but other important aspects remain in play for a subordinated people and…” May 1, 10:43
Aidan on Seven Days Too Long: “Exactly CC, both “parties” are really just a collection of independents standing under a broad banner. The problem is, standing…” May 1, 10:13
Captain Caveman on Seven Days Too Long: ““What “nothing else” screams to me (and to many others) is “we can’t agree on even the basics” and which…” May 1, 09:48
Campbell Clansman on Seven Days Too Long: “While your description of SNP voters is accurate, they are NOT the “majority.” The polls for the last year have…” May 1, 09:41
Aidan on Seven Days Too Long: “So vote for a tiny micro-party which is vanishingly unlikely to win any seats, when you could instead vote against…” May 1, 08:52
TURABDIN on Seven Days Too Long: “AS A GESTURE TO THE K&Q of ENGLAND, Trump cuts tax on uisge beatha…..that great foreign owned export. Did you…” May 1, 08:43
diabloandco on Seven Days Too Long: “can anyone tell me how to get rid of Microsoft cretinous news , which pops up every time I open…” May 1, 07:53
Athanasius on Seven Days Too Long: “Don’t vote. The government will get in.” May 1, 06:30
Peter McAvoy on Seven Days Too Long: “Has the site of the fire in union street been examined to see if the buildings and roads are in…” May 1, 02:05
Young Lochinvar on Seven Days Too Long: “FFS What is up with you lot? Vote ATLS. Simple. “Independence, nothing else”. Isn’t that what we are crying out…” Apr 30, 23:49
Rob on Seven Days Too Long: “I did vote for Fergus, its not that I don’t like what the SNP used to stand for, its more…” Apr 30, 23:27
Alf Baird on Seven Days Too Long: “The Crown as relating to the Kingdom of England seems clear enough, an thars nae doubt thon Croun is whit…” Apr 30, 22:31
James on Seven Days Too Long: “Dan; I’m south Scotland and have an ATLS choice on the list so they will get my vote, sadly there…” Apr 30, 22:12
Mark Beggan on Seven Days Too Long: “I think Scotland is about to become the land that time forgot.” Apr 30, 21:17
Cynicus on Seven Days Too Long: “If you can, vote for Fergus Ewing. #No Votes SNP.” Apr 30, 21:13
Cynicus on Seven Days Too Long: “If you van, vote for Fergus Ewing. #No Votes SNP.” Apr 30, 21:12
diabloandco on Seven Days Too Long: “Please , please go and vote – spoil your ballot paper if no-one appeals – but please vote as even…” Apr 30, 21:11
Dan on Seven Days Too Long: “The trouble is James, that after 10 years and two Scottish parliament elections, there is now a choice of voting…” Apr 30, 21:06
Doug on Seven Days Too Long: “Our only hope for independence is Farage becoming PM in England.” Apr 30, 21:02
Doug on Seven Days Too Long: “A leader with any integrity would resign. So, aye, Swinney will remain as leader. The gutless memebership will probably beg…” Apr 30, 21:00