Alert readers will of course be aware that one of this site’s most frequently-recurring themes is “phantom news”, whereby events or unpleasant opinions that newspapers or broadcasters really want to have happened are conveniently brought to life, either by some random nobody on the internet, or an unnamed “source” or “insider”.
So when Nicola Sturgeon did something today that nearly everyone in the Northern Hemisphere knew she was going to do sometime soon, but wasn’t expecting just yet, there wasn’t time to prepare actual real people with the required quotes.
In the modern media world, though, that isn’t a problem.
We saw this exchange on Twitter this morning, involving left-wing Labour activist Eoin Clarke, a reader, and Scottish Labour list MSP Elaine Smith.
Smith professed to find it “unbelievable” and “scary” that the reader thought he’d had Tory governments for most of his lifetime. (We asked him how old he was and he said 34, which means he’s had Tory governments for 62% of his life, so that checks out.)
But it’s a standard Scottish Labour line that there’s no real difference between Scottish and English voters in terms of favouring left-wing politics, so we thought we’d just quickly check the arithmetic on that. The results are unlikely to shock you.
Our attention was drawn today to hardcore shrieky Loyalist nutter collective Scotland In Union releasing “new research” on an independent Scotland’s finances, which in fact came out last year but which for unknown reasons they’re touting again now.
Commissioned by the loongroup from a London-based thinktank that we’d never heard of by the name of “Europe Economics”, it predictably produces a doom-and-gloom conclusion that independence would have cost over £10bn in the first year.
There are so many gaping chasms in the logic we could hardly stop laughing for long enough to type, but one in particular was worth wiping the tears from our eyes for.
We were very pleased to hear Gary Robertson challenge Kezia Dugdale on the curious matter of Scottish Labour’s membership and income figures on today’s Good Morning Scotland. Dugdale flapped and dodged and waffled for as long as she could before diverting the topic onto federalism, and eventually managed to wriggle away from the subject without any sort of proper answer (through no fault of Robertson’s).
It reveals that the party’s income from donations plunged from £600,000 in 2015 to £100,000 last year, which in the article is blamed on Jeremy Corbyn’s UK leadership (even though Dugdale opposed him in the leadership election).
But there were a few comments in the piece that we thought needed scrutiny.
Should we check out that link and find out whether the then-FM really DID “claim that the Scottish NHS would be privatised if Scots voted No”, readers? Let’s do!
This is Conservative MP Dominic Raab, a member of the Brexit Select Committee, speaking on the BBC News Channel’s “Hard Talk” programme at 00.45 this morning. Perhaps imagining that nobody would be watching at such an ungodly hour, it seems he felt able to be unusually candid.
We left the last bit on in order to demonstrate that he was still talking about Scotland as well as Ireland. (He went on to recite the usual boilerplate about all leaving together as the UK etc etc, you can watch the whole show for yourself on iPlayer.)
But let’s just get that key early exchange down in writing for the record.
The Sunday Herald ran an extraordinary article on page 2 yesterday, and by the time we’d finished being startled by what nonsense it was, it set us wondering about why.
Young Lochinvar on A Stitch In Timing: “Who is the producer(s)? Kenny Everett’s “Tinsel Man”?” Feb 7, 13:41
Hatey McHateface on A Stitch In Timing: “MSM reporting the six hammer wielding activists will be indicted for re-trial on February 18th. Gives them ample time to…” Feb 7, 13:37
Aidan on A Stitch In Timing: “Look everyone, another interesting and insightful comment from our finest intellect “James”” Feb 7, 13:29
Hatey McHateface on A Stitch In Timing: “Only a matter of time until Burns gets the treatment: https://unherd.com/2026/02/was-shakespeare-a-black-woman/” Feb 7, 13:25
Hatey McHateface on The Marshalling Plan: “Have you verified they’re not driving automatics?” Feb 7, 13:22
Hatey McHateface on The Marshalling Plan: ““If you’re going to do murder en masse” Never under-estimate the appeal to many ordinary people of any political policy…” Feb 7, 13:18
Northcode on The Marshalling Plan: ““Personally though the monyed people are actually scum and perverts…” I’m a multi-millionaire, James… I don’t think we can be…” Feb 7, 13:17
James Cheyne on The Marshalling Plan: “When you see it, you can not un-see it, When you live it, you can not deny it. This is…” Feb 7, 13:10
Sven on A Stitch In Timing: “Fearghas MacFionnlaigh @ 12.35. Absolutely beyond irony !” Feb 7, 13:09
Northcode on A Stitch In Timing: ““Mulvaney, a man who identifies as a woman, has been cast as Anne Boleyn… ” Holy Mary mother of Christ…” Feb 7, 13:07
James Cheyne on The Marshalling Plan: “The moneyed people think of themselves as Elite, Personally though the monyed people are actually scum and perverts, I think…” Feb 7, 13:02
James on A Stitch In Timing: “Goose-stepping clown looking for a circus.” Feb 7, 12:51
The Flying Iron of Doom on The Marshalling Plan: “I’ll never comprehend how mentally ill depraved cretins could exert control over so much as a fast car with a…” Feb 7, 12:49
James Cheyne on The Marshalling Plan: “Finances for the lobbyists for purpose to gain inroads to politicians to alter laws of the Country cannot derive from…” Feb 7, 12:42
Northcode on The Marshalling Plan: “Stay away from fascism folks… it’s an ugly and destructive creature – although its clothes designers came up with some…” Feb 7, 12:37
Fearghas MacFhionnlaigh on A Stitch In Timing: “‘ALL-FEMALE’ HIT MUSICAL ‘SIX’ BLASTED FOR CASTING A MAN AS ANNE BOLEYN The musical ‘Six’ has cast controversial transgender comedian…” Feb 7, 12:35
James Cheyne on The Marshalling Plan: “Fearghas, Remove the funding that arrives on government doorsteps and re-instate law and real judges, To much paid for funded…” Feb 7, 12:28
Hatey McHateface on The Marshalling Plan: ““mentally ill depraved cretins seeking ultimate power and control over mass populations” Hmmm. I’ll never comprehend how mentally ill depraved…” Feb 7, 12:17
Hatey McHateface on The Marshalling Plan: “Aye, Northy, the Wehrmacht used to have “Gott mit uns” inscribed on their belt buckles. I’ll leave you to translate.…” Feb 7, 12:06
James Cheyne on The Marshalling Plan: “The control, the propaganda, net working, the funding, the imposed immigrations, the taxes on land and property, reduced control of…” Feb 7, 11:57
Northcode on The Marshalling Plan: “I don’t know whit tae tell folk whin thae frunch and girn aboot aw the evil bairgin roond the world…” Feb 7, 11:34
Cynicus on A Stitch In Timing: “MR SWINNEY GOES TO WASHINGTON Absolutely correct, Willie. This is a tawdry attempt to equate his residence at the British…” Feb 7, 11:27
James Cheyne on The Marshalling Plan: “Sometimes you need to hold your nose and engage your brain.” Feb 7, 11:02
James Cheyne on The Marshalling Plan: “What the Epstein document files release overall has done is shown the depth and lowly depraved nature of those whom…” Feb 7, 10:59
PC Foster on A Stitch In Timing: “Perhaps you or Stu could do a FOI request. Some poking around is needed.” Feb 7, 10:42
Hatey McHateface on A Stitch In Timing: ““‘rudimentary understanding’ of the colonial condition” Aye, Alf, we’re just too thick to understand. When we travel abroad, we’re all…” Feb 7, 10:10
Alf Baird on A Stitch In Timing: ““that mythical country, the UK” The colonial hoax and the colonizers inevitable rejection of the colonized has yet to be…” Feb 7, 09:26
Hatey McHateface on A Stitch In Timing: “Good point, Willie. Our host could turn this place into a serious forum for discussion and debate overnight, by moderating…” Feb 7, 08:54
Hatey McHateface on A Stitch In Timing: “We all defer to your encyclopedic expertise on video clips, James, gleaned while hunched over them for day after day,…” Feb 7, 08:36
GM on A Stitch In Timing: “‘We all know that Swinney stayed with Mandelson on his whisky trip to USA in Sep 25. I have done…” Feb 7, 01:43
