They just can’t help it 115
Posted on
January 08, 2015 by
Rev. Stuart Campbell
“Wait, this story’s entirely true. Do something, Torcuil.”
“Sorted, boss.”
Author Archive
The goldfish principle 245
Posted on
January 08, 2015 by
Rev. Stuart Campbell
It is, we’ve remarked before, often difficult to satirise Scottish Labour, because it’s hard to think of anything more fatuous, transparently hypocritical or just plain idiotic than the things they actually say for real. The party’s recent demand that the Scottish Government should set up a “resilience fund” to cushion the blow of falls in oil prices – or as everyone else on Earth usually calls it, an “oil fund” – is only the latest example.
There are just five months between the two tweets above. Yet Labour seemingly believes that the Scottish public will already have completely forgotten that the party spent most of the last two years telling Scots an oil fund was a mad, impossible idea.
But it’s even more ludicrous than it sounds.
Drawing a blank 71
Posted on
January 07, 2015 by
Rev. Stuart Campbell
We’ve got nothing today, readers. We don’t want to turn into Wings Over Jim Murphy, but otherwise the Scottish political scene is a bit tumbleweedy. Tell us something interesting that we should be covering. Or just a fun fact, or a joke, or anything.
In the light of the absolute horror at Charlie Hebdo today, it’s either that or we’re going to start running cartoons of Mohammed on principle.
Back-to-work blues 372
Posted on
January 06, 2015 by
Rev. Stuart Campbell
It’s always tricky coming back to the office after the holidays. You get a bit ring-rusty and it can take a few days before you’re firing on all cylinders again.
So we’re going to be charitable and assume that lack of match fitness was the cause of Scottish Labour’s astonishing multi-track trainwreck yesterday.
A minor detail 192
Posted on
January 05, 2015 by
Rev. Stuart Campbell
From today’s Telegraph:
Actual number of children belonging to Nicola Sturgeon and Peter Murrell: 0.
You literally can’t make this stuff up.
One thousand louder 142
Posted on
January 05, 2015 by
Rev. Stuart Campbell
We had to extend our festive semi-break for a day to deal with some administrative matters, readers, but it’s just as well, because the thing that happened today would have defied our best attempts at either analysis or satire.
That’s a real thing we didn’t make up. Saints preserve us.
Then and now 165
Posted on
January 04, 2015 by
Rev. Stuart Campbell
The union of the snakes 418
Posted on
January 03, 2015 by
Rev. Stuart Campbell
There’s a new hot topic among the Westminster commentariat.
Because desperate times call for desperate measures.
We really do adore him 304
Posted on
January 02, 2015 by
Rev. Stuart Campbell
If twice is a coincidence and three times is a trend, then these five recent pictures of “Saint” Jim Murphy – the martyr who endured an egging for all our sins – from the print media surely tell us something interesting.
The Ne’erday Game 277
Posted on
January 01, 2015 by
Rev. Stuart Campbell
We’re technically on holiday today, folks, so for the first time in a very long time we’re going to write something about football and if you don’t like it that’s just your tough luck. Nobody’s making you click the “Read more” button.
Two fairly remarkable things happened in Scottish football today. The first was that Aberdeen went top of the Premiership for the first time in about 20 years, but the second was of a bit more relevance to this site’s political and media-monitoring brief.
That’s because, for the very first time that we’re aware of since Rangers went bust in 2012, the chief executive of the Scottish league’s governing body, Neil Doncaster, explicitly and directly stated that the club currently 15 points adrift of Hearts in the game’s second tier was the same one that died two and a half years ago.
And that matters more than you think it does.
That was a year that was 355
Posted on
December 31, 2014 by
Rev. Stuart Campbell
A simple plan 304
Posted on
December 30, 2014 by
Rev. Stuart Campbell
Scottish Labour clearly get a pretty good deal from the printers’ shop that makes the giant pound coins, because they’re waving them around again.
The North British branch office’s latest wizard jape is to upset all the people who they urged to join for £5 just last month – never mind the gullible saps forking out nine times that much – by offering cut-price memberships at £1 a year.
It’s what the retail trade calls a “loss leader” – in effect the party will be paying people to join, because £1 won’t come anywhere near to covering the cost of processing each new member, sending them a membership card and so on.
But it did give us an idea.
