Here’s Ruth Davidson at FMQs today, telling the chamber that “last week the Royal Institute of Chartered Surveyors said the real problem facing investment and jobs in Scotland was [Nicola Sturgeon’s] threat of a second referendum”.
Would you like to know how many actual people that was, readers?
There was a rather comforting predictability about the headlines the Scottish media greeted the first day of the SNP conference in Glasgow with.
Unsurprisingly, the Express’ lead story was a piece of fabricated drivel based on alleged quotes from an unnamed source claiming that the Scottish Government would resign in order to force an election and win a mandate that it already has.
(The SNP’s manifesto this May, on which it won a third landslide election victory in a row, clearly reserved the right to call a second referendum should there be a serious material change in circumstances, explicitly citing the Brexit scenario as an example.)
Both articles are essentially the sort of comedy pastiches of terrible journalism one might create as a cautionary example in a media studies degree course, so we’ll waste no more of your time on them. The Herald’s piece, though, is at least marginally more interesting.
Low-wattage Labour list MSP Neil Findlay (rejected by the electorate of Almond Valley by a thumping 8,393 votes in May) puffed himself up to maximum socialism this week and attacked the SNP’s rather more popular Paisley MP Mhairi Black over a Scottish Daily Express story about travel expenses.
It might have been an idea if he’d read the piece all the way to the end.
Fear and lies work. Over many decades (and really for centuries) the Unionist parties and the media have succeeded in persuading a large percentage of Scots that they’re beggars, scroungers, vagrants and “subsidy junkies” dependent on the ever-generous charity of England to keep them from starvation.
And in terms of the facts, that hasn’t always been an easy sell.
Today’s Sunday Times didn’t bother with any subtlety in its signalling of how people should expect the Scottish media to handle next week’s GERS figures.
There’ll be nothing but repeats of all last year’s articles in the papers, so there doesn’t seem to be much point in re-writing all the rebuttals. We’d advise readers not to expect to hear any of the facts or arguments in any of the above articles aired on TV or radio discussions of the new figures either. For the sake of your blood pressure, it’s probably best to stick to old QI repeats on Dave for the next eight days.
Alert readers may have noticed that we tend to slack off a bit at the weekend these days. There’s no point burning ourselves out with busywork at a time when there’s not very much going on in Scottish politics (certainly not in terms of independence, at any rate), and weekend traffic is always lower anyway.
So we’ve only just now got round to taking a proper look at something the online Yoon community and punditariat was getting itself very excited about on Saturday.
James on Only An Excuse: “So where does this leave the mugs who’ve been voting for the SNP over the last few years. The scotland…” May 25, 12:27
James on Only An Excuse: “YL; Cheers! As you know the Scottish people only bestowed the sobriquet “Good” to one of their kings who had…” May 25, 11:58
Socrates MacSporran on Only An Excuse: “I note from the posts by agentx there is a difference of £58,375.84 between the sum Murrell was originally charged…” May 25, 11:57
100%Yes on Only An Excuse: “I’d love to know if he can’t got into a relationship with her would he be still facing a trail?” May 25, 11:42
Oneliner on Only An Excuse: “Perhaps she will give evidence from behind a screen” May 25, 11:39
agentx on Only An Excuse: “Nicola Sturgeon married former SNP chief executive Peter Murrell on July 16, 2010, at Oran Mor in Glasgow. Murrell: The…” May 25, 11:35
Geri on Only An Excuse: “Oops! Sorry, I posted in the wrong convo… It’s psychological warfare & it’s by design to feel hopeless & absolutely…” May 25, 11:28
Bilbo on Only An Excuse: “I see that the SNP saying that Holyrood has to ‘unite behind Scotland’s right to decide’ https://archive.is/qWTfK What about independence…” May 25, 11:25
agentx on Only An Excuse: “It’s obvious now why the trial was put back from early May until after the election. I imagine what a…” May 25, 11:20
Bilbo on Only An Excuse: “From articles read, there’s no pictures of Sturgeon there offering her husband moral support. Any chance of seeing her there…” May 25, 11:18
agentx on Only An Excuse: “Assistant Chief Constable Stuart Houston led Operation Branchform, and said Murrell “abused his privileged position with access to Scottish National…” May 25, 11:08
Geri on Only An Excuse: “It’s psychological warfare & it’s by design to feel hopeless & absolutely fck up every level of government so the…” May 25, 11:06
agentx on Only An Excuse: “10:43am 25/05/26 Peter Murrell has been remanded into custody after pleading guilty to embezzling £400,310.65 from the party at the…” May 25, 10:45
Alf Baird on Only An Excuse: “An oppressed people must analyse and understand their oppression and its root, which is colonialism. So weel duin Northcode. In…” May 25, 10:44
agentx on Only An Excuse: “Murrell admits embezzling £400,000 from the SNP published at 10:40 10:40 Paul O’Hare BBC Scotland reporter at the High Court…” May 25, 10:42
agentx on Only An Excuse: “Murrell has arrived at Court. https://www.thenational.scot/news/26135666.live-updates-peter-murrell-court-accused-embezzlement/” May 25, 09:52
Captain Caveman on Only An Excuse: “@Hatey Yes, I think YL is “identifying” me (how very left wing) as some thunder-thighed chubby lass, apparently as based…” May 25, 08:56
Northcode on Only An Excuse: “Here is Point Seven in my eight point pattern of points: Seven: The dignity of … Ach, you know what?…” May 25, 07:38
Bilbo on Only An Excuse: “The same is being said about Andy Burnham https://archive.is/VadTi The fake working class/poverty stricken childhood Shtick has been going on…” May 25, 06:17
Young Lochinvar on Only An Excuse: “Happy anniversary today of the birth of Robert the Bruce. Known as Good King Robert, through personal loss and hardship…” May 25, 00:44
Geri on Only An Excuse: “The military has lost a lot of respect since WW2 because it’s just not cool to mow down defenceless civilians…” May 25, 00:06
Geri on Only An Excuse: “Countries used to be treated like a pariah state for assassinating other Sovereign countries leaders. Then the Americans took over…” May 24, 23:26
Young Lochinvar on Only An Excuse: “I’mnogay McI’mnogayface @ 7.18 Yes, I did indeed laugh about C3 wanting to be a piece of ladies intimate toiletries..…” May 24, 22:58
Aidan on Only An Excuse: “He can be replaced, but only by Trump sending in the bombers!” May 24, 22:22
Geri on Only An Excuse: “They can vote him out, ya eejit. & So can his government. I know it’s hard to imagine, cause your…” May 24, 22:06
Geri on Only An Excuse: “That was a funny autocorrect…lol I really need to turn that off.” May 24, 21:50
Geri on Only An Excuse: “& btw, that was only cause they’d came back from WW1. They’d little option but amend voting rights. They’d just…” May 24, 21:41
Hatey McHateface on Only An Excuse: “Vote out a president, Geri? You’re having yet another laugh at Scotland’s expense. You think we’ve forgotten your admiration for…” May 24, 21:37
Hatey McHateface on Only An Excuse: “@CC 11:46 The Auld Man Of Lochnagar has quite a hyperactive imagination, hasn’t he? Forever posting about shirt lifting. Forever…” May 24, 21:17
Hatey McHateface on Only An Excuse: “Why, Geri? Are you having an organism again?” May 24, 20:59