As a lifelong political geek and former SNP and Alba Party member, I’ve spent years supporting Scotland’s independence movement. However, over the last few years, I’ve watched the campaign (as opposed to support for independence) wither away. Being a Scottish nationalist has become increasingly disheartening, like watching someone you love succumb to a slow, debilitating illness. In frustration, I switched off from my homeland and turned my focus to the drama of US politics.
Over the last three years I immersed myself in it, watching both left and right-wing outlets. I became so hooked and invested that I jumped on a plane to Washington DC for the 2024 election. I canvassed with DC Democrats in rural Pennsylvania (that’s me third from the left in the pic below), attended Kamala Harris’s concession rally, and went to Trump’s only watch party in DC.
My journey led me to believe that Scotland’s independence campaign could learn a great deal from Trump’s victory and the Democrats’ failure.
We’ll give you three guesses as to the highly controversial and extravagantly taxpayer-funded organisation that has its rainbow fingerprints all over this story, readers.
So it looks like the USA has elected a mad orange rapist convicted of 34 felonies who could yet be in jail by the time of his inauguration. (He would remain President even if that happened, which would be really funny.) And we can’t even blame them for it, because the alternative they were offered was, remarkably and stupendously, worse.
To be honest, readers, the peculiar events of yesterday continued to nag at us all day as every news broadcaster in Scotland and beyond leapt eagerly on the ludicrous non-story from the Herald On Sunday’s front page. (It was even the #2 item on BBC Radio Wales, inexplicably).
For such an absolute nothingball of scurrilous sub-gossip to so dominate the entire news media was just too strange to ignore. We cannot remember the last time a low-grade freelancer managed to sell the same story to FOUR major Scottish newspapers – who normally, remember, only want exclusives for their big front-page splashes – let alone a crummy opinion columnist (not even an actual news reporter) who’s only been back in journalism for five minutes after a 15-year break as a failed PR guru.
(Once they’d all run the shoddy hatchet piece, TV and radio then had all the excuse they needed to blare it across the airwaves. “Oh, it’s not us inflating and amplifying this garbage, guv, we’re just reporting what the papers are saying.”)
So in our eternal quest for enlightenment and understanding we thought we’d see if we could find out a bit more about the little-known but recently-revived sleeper assassin with the ironic name: Carlos Alba.
Alex Salmond will be laid to rest in the green turf of Aberdeenshire today in a quiet and dignified private ceremony. (A public celebration of his life will take place next month.)
Most of Scotland’s press and commentariat beclowned itself shamefully after his death just as it did during his life, but below is a (regrettably short) collection of those who did otherwise and who deserve to be noted honourably beside the man himself.
Redaction is a tricky business, and comes with numerous pitfalls even if you’re being careful, which not everyone is. If you’re involved in creating a document you know will have to be redacted, there are a variety of safeguarding approaches you can adopt.
When I worked on a videogames magazine called Amiga Power in the 1990s, we ran a fun comedy feature about censorship. But because the company that published the magazine had had some unfortunate mishaps in the field, we took extra care by typing all the “offensive” words as random-length strings of Xs when we wrote the article.
And it was lucky that we did, because as you can see in the feature’s strapline, the art department misaligned the red redaction bar on some of them, and if there’d been a sweary in there it would have been easily identified.
Young Lochinvar on The quality of mercy: “Aidan You are being something of a contrarian here. As I told you recently it’s fairly easy to find out…” Apr 7, 22:40
James on The quality of mercy: “Here’s the misfit and the pub bore back on shift.*yawn* Saw your drivel and thought of this, dunno why… Quote;…” Apr 7, 22:26
Geri on The quality of mercy: “Same could be said of any political party. At least they’re registered in Scotland eh? Westminster politicians are always with…” Apr 7, 22:22
Young Lochinvar on The quality of mercy: “Geri I suspect Baby Trump was handed Uncle Sam’s “Book Of Grudges” by “them and those” knowing he was flaky…” Apr 7, 22:18
Geri on The quality of mercy: “They’ve always committed war crimes. It’s in their DNA. They just didn’t gob off about it like the fake Don…” Apr 7, 21:28
diabloandco on The quality of mercy: “I mentioned a song I’d like to share , now I find that it is on youtube music . It’s…” Apr 7, 21:02
Northcode on The quality of mercy: “A’ve aye felt ther is sum secret magic roond and aboot Scotland and the Scots. And sae it wid seem…” Apr 7, 19:37
Aidan on The quality of mercy: “Oh aye CC, although not parted fast enough apparently as they’re £3k short! Their own website doesn’t even contain a…” Apr 7, 18:39
Captain Caveman on The quality of mercy: “Just one long grift. Rinse and repeat. “A fool and his money” etc.” Apr 7, 17:28
Aidan on The quality of mercy: “These supposedly dedicated independence fighters with the grit and determination to reclaim the nation can’t somehow pull together £1600 each…” Apr 7, 16:41
Young Lochinvar on The quality of mercy: “Beggars Mobilise your air cadets unit then did they? Well I suppose we should be grateful that at least back…” Apr 7, 15:14
sarah on The quality of mercy: “CASH NEEDED. To get new candidates/parties known to the voters, there must at least be a leaflet to every address…” Apr 7, 15:11
Young Lochinvar on The quality of mercy: “DB Yup. Uncle Sam was late for the last two world wars and is just determined to be there in…” Apr 7, 14:50
TURABDIN on The quality of mercy: “THE QUALITY OF MERDE Scots have the right to decide their own future….waffle, waffle, another ref, waffle, waffle https://www.snp.org/first-minister-john-swinney-addresses-the-nation-about-scotlands-right-to-decide-full-speech/ England…” Apr 7, 13:23
James on The quality of mercy: “That right, aye? Back to barracks?” Apr 7, 12:35
lothianlad on The quality of mercy: “All because the SNP has sold out on independence and become the administrators of the british state. All, or nearly…” Apr 7, 12:19
Alf Baird on The quality of mercy: ““they were really really strapped for cash and so had the bright idea to “make the colonies pay”” Yes, colonialism…” Apr 7, 12:15
lothianlad on Sicknote Slippers: “His Majesty’s United Kingdom thanks you for your service, Pete. Never a truer word spoken about comfy slippers!” Apr 7, 12:09
Aidan on The quality of mercy: “The U.K. does not offer “unions” with any other country though does it. The point is that Scotland is much…” Apr 7, 11:43
Iain More on The quality of mercy: “I recall a treacherous lying Yoon Chemistry teacher at school in the early 1970’s telling us that it was the…” Apr 7, 11:30
Confused on The quality of mercy: “let’s get into money, though, real money and deep reasons … that england was really strapped for cash was the…” Apr 7, 11:16
Confused on The quality of mercy: “but, but … https://archive.ph/t9RAY – I thought it was an ENGINE OF WEALTH CREATION the cognitive dissonance is strong in…” Apr 7, 11:15
Geri on The quality of mercy: “I’m amazed that little Engurlund doesn’t have every country in the entire world signing up to one of these fabulous…” Apr 7, 10:14
diabloandco on The quality of mercy: “Is anyone a tad worried by the actions of our great bestie to the west? Or indeed the fact we…” Apr 7, 08:04
Aidan on The quality of mercy: “Absolutely Geri – it’s one of the most important lessons we can learn from great military generals, major construction projects…” Apr 7, 06:45
Mark Beggan on The quality of mercy: “I served in Operation Lionheart. Auf vedersein pet! Was the golden age of British television. Never missed it. Yes Deutsch…” Apr 7, 02:52
Young Lochinvar on The quality of mercy: “Beggars Spend much time on the tools in West Germany or BAOR holding back Ivan?? No? Thought not. I did.…” Apr 7, 00:29
Young Lochinvar on The quality of mercy: “Beggars Quoting Hitler (one on from the derivative Main Kampf here).. You’ve graduated from Moseley it seems.. Not a good…” Apr 7, 00:21