The SNP has of course denied them, but they also denied our recent leak from the party’s draft manifesto and we know for sure that that was real. The trouble with lying all the time is that nobody believes you even if you occasionally tell the the truth.
Of course, there would be an easy way to prove the numbers were a fake – release the real ones, which is in any case the most fundamental element of transparency in a democratic election. And whatever they are could hardly be any more embarrassing than the rumours, which have candidates topping the list (and likely to get seats) on a shocking 2.4% of the vote.
It brings us genuinely no pleasure at all to report that events in Scottish politics are panning out exactly the way we’ve been telling you they would for nearly two years.
There’s a strange new affliction affecting the SNP: fear of figures.
Now, we should say that we don’t believe for even a second that the SNP has actually had 10,000 new members in the last two days. It’s ridiculous to the point of insulting. But purely for the sake of argument, let’s imagine it was true.
Finally, after an astonishing four and a half days of “counting”, the SNP have released their candidate rankings for the regional list in this year’s Holyrood election. We’ll give you the results first, and then something much more interesting.
Like an old man getting up for the fourth time in the middle of the night, the Scottish Government has squeezed out another little dribble of its legal advice in respect of the conduct of its shambolic investigation into false allegations against Alex Salmond.
And to push that gross analogy to its outermost limit, it must have found releasing one of the documents in particular as painful as passing a rather large kidney stone.
What puzzles many about the Alex Salmond situation is motive. It’s incredibly difficult for some Yes supporters to imagine any motive that could justify the awfulness of what Alex Salmond has been put through by his successor, and so they reject the whole idea of any sinister goings-on out of hand.
However, it’s far easier to understand what went on when you look at the personality of Nicola Sturgeon and her historical pattern of behaviour.
Because the core fact is that Sturgeon simply cannot bear to lose. She’s very single-minded, and doesn’t really adapt or regroup in the face of adversity. When events and new information make problems for her ideas and plans, she just keeps going – often creating more problems as she tries to force the plan back on track.
Sturgeon’s main priority – in common with most politicians – is to stay in power and to boost her own image and profile. We can look at some hot topics and her behaviour around them, and gain clear insights into what happened to Alex Salmond and why.
We’re only two-thirds of the way through Nicola Sturgeon’s evidence to the Fabiani inquiry, and there’s probably not much point in expressing our opinion on it because you could almost certainly have guessed what it was going to be. The First Minister has been disingenuous, evasive, defensive and at times outright dishonest.
But although we were expecting all of that, this truly shocked us:
That’s the First Minister flatly stating, under oath, that even now she doesn’t know who all the complainers are. And readers can make their own minds up about how credible a claim that is. But I can tell you this:
I know who they all are.
Craig Murray knows who they all are.
Every journalist who covered the trial knows who they all are.
(And we can reasonably assume their editors also know who they all are.)
In fact pretty much everyone who’s in any way connected to Scottish politics knows the identity of every single one of these women. If you’re willing to believe that we all do but Nicola Sturgeon doesn’t, well, fair enough. But also, I’m a Nigerian prince and I’d like to pass several million pounds through your bank account. Please get in touch.
Yesterday’s evidence session at the Fabiani inquiry had several standout moments, but by a narrow margin this was our favourite.
And just in case you were wondering, yes, that IS Scotland’s top prosecutor, the Lord Advocate, chief of the Crown Office and Procurator Fiscal Service, James Wolffe QC, repeatedly refusing to tell an MSP whether or not it’s a criminal offence in Scotland to refuse to comply with a court-ordered search warrant.
So next time you’ve ramraided a load of iPads and the polis come knocking on your door asking if they can have a nosy around your attic for them, just tell them they can’t come in because it’s a matter of your motivations.
We just put up a post, readers, but we’ve pulled it again because this has happened:
Because of this:
More as we get it, but this would seem to be an extraordinary move from the Tories if they weren’t pretty confident they had the backing of the other opposition parties. At a minimum it’s quite the scene-setter for tomorrow’s appearance of the First Minister in front of the Fabiani committee. We presume we don’t need to tell you to stay tuned.
We’ll say one thing for Police Scotland – when it comes to Freedom Of Information requests, dealing with them compared to the Scottish Government or Crown Office is a breath of fresh air. Responses tend to be reasonably swift and you actually get some straight answers, like these.
And in this case they’re pretty remarkable answers.
Geri on Two Men Unalike: “AUOB isn’t the SNP d’oh!” Mar 2, 23:03
Insider on Two Men Unalike: “Sarah, Why doesn’t AUOB take the money from the £660,000 that the the SNP is holding on its behalf ?” Mar 2, 22:24
Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: ““enshrined in international law” Uh oh. That’s fecked then.” Mar 2, 22:23
GM on The Tactics Of Suicide: “Any details escape as to what she was up to? It must have been something.” Mar 2, 22:23
sarah on Two Men Unalike: “Alf Baird has posted a link at 8.59 p.m. to the AUOB crowdfunder to cover the 4 marches this year…” Mar 2, 21:42
Alf Baird on Two Men Unalike: “Yes Robert, Swinney is only attending because this event is specifically for Fanon’s ‘legal tendency’ within the indy movement; that…” Mar 2, 20:59
Geri on Two Men Unalike: “What is this so called Left-wing ideology you speak of?” Mar 2, 20:52
Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: ““bombing the enemies of the chosen people” If only it was possible to have a maturely moderated debate on here,…” Mar 2, 20:01
Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: “I was going to say the sludge will be collected and distributed around certain wards in early May, in an…” Mar 2, 19:46
BLMac on Two Men Unalike: “One thing concerns me about these puberty blocker trials. Are they legal? We have an Age of Consent for a…” Mar 2, 19:36
robertkknight on Two Men Unalike: “Who is he going on behalf of? King Chucky? Sir Kid Starver? MI5? Sure as hell isn’t going along to…” Mar 2, 19:26
Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: “If he wears a tea towel on his heid he’ll blend right in with the rest. You should go too,…” Mar 2, 19:22
Mark Beggan on Two Men Unalike: “As happy as a condemned man spilling his last meal down the toilet.” Mar 2, 19:06
sarah on Two Men Unalike: “Hold the front page. All is not lost for Scotland’s independence. John Swinney is going to be on the Believe…” Mar 2, 18:34
Mark Beggan on Two Men Unalike: “From that comment I think you are already there. You don’t have to die to be in hell. Leftwing ideology…” Mar 2, 18:19
Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: ““Hell does not exist” Apparently, in your reality, neither does humour. Is it possible to get to your reality from…” Mar 2, 18:17
David Holden on Two Men Unalike: “Oh well the Epstein files must be more serious than we thought as the lengths Donald Trump has gone to…” Mar 2, 18:11
Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: “Quite an unrelated response, Marie, but I’ll bite. Unless you’re a co-religionist, you’d be a fourth class citizen in the…” Mar 2, 18:11
Marie on Two Men Unalike: “Hell does not exist. Hell is a human created concept designed by the powerful to strike fear into people and…” Mar 2, 18:10
Geri on Two Men Unalike: “Fandan, I don’t understand a word of that word salad. Try again. If you really must.” Mar 2, 18:08
Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: “Anybody ken if the brain is an organ? Only, Geri’s interminable rants, and her recent claim of organ snatching, have…” Mar 2, 17:57
Mark Beggan on Two Men Unalike: “NEWS FLASH News just in. The Iranian revolutionary council is having a crisis meeting in hell.” Mar 2, 17:49
Marie on Two Men Unalike: “You would be a second class citizen in Isr Hatey. And if you owned land in West Bank it will…” Mar 2, 17:44
Aidan on Two Men Unalike: “It’s quite amazing Geri that apparently all this has been achieved by countries with no economies, no resources and weapons…” Mar 2, 17:37
Mark Beggan on Two Men Unalike: “Yes even here in Bonnie Scotland. The patchwork of Leftwing, at whatever level in society, all have the same rabid…” Mar 2, 17:36
Geri on Two Men Unalike: “One thing is crystal clear on the Scottish Independence front, Sunshine . Do not, under any circumstances, have your military…” Mar 2, 17:35
Confused on Two Men Unalike: “you admit you know fuck-all, but then have a pop anyway … how does that even make sense? – I…” Mar 2, 17:28
Geri on Two Men Unalike: ““I never post about airborne warfare.” Oh yes you do. Yer never done phappin over F-16s even though they’ve done…” Mar 2, 17:22
Geri on Two Men Unalike: “Tell the Iranians what? You wee warhawks believe any old crap the BBC propagandists tell you. There are Christians &…” Mar 2, 17:11
Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: ““what expertise do you have in airborne warfare?” Compared with your obsessional butt monomania, Confused, none at all. I never…” Mar 2, 17:00