Back in the 1980s there was a hit game for the ZX Spectrum home computer called Worse Things Happen At Sea. In it you play a robot whose job is to get a heavily-laden cargo ship safely to port, except that more and more disasters keep befalling it.
It springs leaks, it veers off course, the engine overheats and the robot’s power runs down, until eventually the catalogue of catastrophes overwhelms the harassed metallic custodian and the boat slides down into the murky depths.
We wonder if that feels familiar to anyone at the moment.
On 23rd March this year, after Alex Salmond was found not guilty of 13 criminal charges in the High Court, I called on the Scottish Government to set up a judge-led inquiry into the allegation that he had been the subject of a conspiracy involving the Scottish Government, which resulted in him being accused of criminal behaviour.
Readers, we can’t tell you how much we want to get back to just dissecting Scotland’s hopeless Unionist media for a living. It’s a lot more fun than what the current political circumstances are obliging us to do, so you can hardly imagine our excitement when we spotted what looked like an open goal in yesterday’s Mail On Sunday.
Our ears pricked up immediately at the sight of the words “up to”, which is invariably a sign of dodgy doings on the way, and so it proved. The article contained no solid data at all about the size of Scottish Government special advisers’ pay rises, only how many SpAds there were and which general pay bands they were in, each of which spans a wide range of between £14,000 and £23,000.
But while the Mail had spooned the sitter six feet over the crossbar – because the crude spin they’d put on it was total rubbish – there was still a loose ball just waiting to be knocked into the back of the net.
SNP Members For Independence? What a ridiculous phrase – surely every member of the SNP is in favour of independence, right?
That’s mostly true of course, but the leadership and many elected representatives of the party appear to be intent on repeating the failed Section 30 route to independence, and also on restricting serious debate about alternative strategies.
It seems that a revised “Plan B” may be discussed at the party conference, still almost two months away, and for all Plan B’s merits it is seriously flawed and its inclusion at the expense of alternative and better plans at conference would merely pay lip service to the term “serious debate”
Something clearly needed to be done, which is why SNP Members For Indy has been set up. So what’s it for and what is it trying to do?
We’re very busy today writing more FOI requests and the like, so we’ll just take a brief moment here to note that hiring super-expensive lawyers to object to the questions you’re being asked DEFINITELY sounds like the behaviour of people who are keen to co-operate fully and in the most transparent way possible with an inquiry:
Having been privileged to serve as SNP National Treasurer, I’m aware of the duties that go with the post. Of course, it’s changed in some ways since then due to the scale of the party, the resources available and even technology. The days are long gone when Joan Knott, who has sadly since passed away, required to take a taxi down to my legal office to have cheques signed between court or clients.
But some things still remain fundamental, and in particular providing annual accounts for the party. That has been done for 2019, in the administrative sense, but what’s missing is their publication and provision either to the NEC or the party more widely.
For sure there’s been no conference but there are other bodies and other ways of making them available to party members. At NEC, conference and indeed anywhere else, members were entitled to see them and question me. It was their right to see them, and it remains so now. So why haven’t they seen them?
A column on a Sturgeon-loyalist indy website that we read yesterday has been mildly annoying us ever since, and in the interests of open debate (but mainly because it’s cold and grey and rainy outside and we can’t go out and feed the swans) we thought it was worth taking half an hour to walk through it a little and explain just why it’s such a dangerous piece of fantasy nonsense.
But first here’s one of said swans. She’s about five months old and her adult feathers are just starting to come through. Isn’t she lovely?
In case things get a bit rough later we’ve got some squirrels and a really fat dachshund as emergency backup, so buckle in.
The comments from committee convener and SNP MP Linda Fabiani (we guess she must be another of those MI5 plants/secret Unionists) are really quite extraordinary. In terms of Parliamentary language they’re only a hair’s-breadth short of an invitation to step outside and settle things with an old-school dust-up in the car park.
The weekend just past saw a convulsion as big as any we can ever recall witnessing on Yes social media, triggered by a series of tweets by Nicola Sturgeon which caused an extraordinary negative reaction out of all proportion to their ostensible content.
The reason was that the First Minister – who had remained silent about countless episodes of hideous misogynistic abuse aimed from her own side at MPs and MSPs like Joan McAlpine and Joanna Cherry – had chosen to suddenly leap into action in defence of the toxically divisive horror that is Glasgow councillor Rhiannon Spear after Spear had been widely criticised for making blatantly false claims in a video promoting her attempt to be selected as the candidate for Argyll & Bute.
(Sturgeon had no such public condemnation for the torrents of abuse the SNP Twitler Youth then unleased on Kirsten Thornton, the female SNP activist and Generation Yes founder who’d pointed out Spear’s untruths.)
The move sent the party’s woke and sane factions into a frenzy of bloodletting which in itself will have little if any impact on the wider electorate, but nonetheless threw into sharp relief the life-and-death battle currently going on for the SNP’s soul.
And since that’s related to what we’ve been writing about on Wings for the bulk of this year, it seemed worthwhile to get some things down on the record once and for all.
Geri on Two Men Unalike: “AUOB isn’t the SNP d’oh!” Mar 2, 23:03
Insider on Two Men Unalike: “Sarah, Why doesn’t AUOB take the money from the £660,000 that the the SNP is holding on its behalf ?” Mar 2, 22:24
Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: ““enshrined in international law” Uh oh. That’s fecked then.” Mar 2, 22:23
GM on The Tactics Of Suicide: “Any details escape as to what she was up to? It must have been something.” Mar 2, 22:23
sarah on Two Men Unalike: “Alf Baird has posted a link at 8.59 p.m. to the AUOB crowdfunder to cover the 4 marches this year…” Mar 2, 21:42
Alf Baird on Two Men Unalike: “Yes Robert, Swinney is only attending because this event is specifically for Fanon’s ‘legal tendency’ within the indy movement; that…” Mar 2, 20:59
Geri on Two Men Unalike: “What is this so called Left-wing ideology you speak of?” Mar 2, 20:52
Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: ““bombing the enemies of the chosen people” If only it was possible to have a maturely moderated debate on here,…” Mar 2, 20:01
Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: “I was going to say the sludge will be collected and distributed around certain wards in early May, in an…” Mar 2, 19:46
BLMac on Two Men Unalike: “One thing concerns me about these puberty blocker trials. Are they legal? We have an Age of Consent for a…” Mar 2, 19:36
robertkknight on Two Men Unalike: “Who is he going on behalf of? King Chucky? Sir Kid Starver? MI5? Sure as hell isn’t going along to…” Mar 2, 19:26
Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: “If he wears a tea towel on his heid he’ll blend right in with the rest. You should go too,…” Mar 2, 19:22
Mark Beggan on Two Men Unalike: “As happy as a condemned man spilling his last meal down the toilet.” Mar 2, 19:06
sarah on Two Men Unalike: “Hold the front page. All is not lost for Scotland’s independence. John Swinney is going to be on the Believe…” Mar 2, 18:34
Mark Beggan on Two Men Unalike: “From that comment I think you are already there. You don’t have to die to be in hell. Leftwing ideology…” Mar 2, 18:19
Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: ““Hell does not exist” Apparently, in your reality, neither does humour. Is it possible to get to your reality from…” Mar 2, 18:17
David Holden on Two Men Unalike: “Oh well the Epstein files must be more serious than we thought as the lengths Donald Trump has gone to…” Mar 2, 18:11
Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: “Quite an unrelated response, Marie, but I’ll bite. Unless you’re a co-religionist, you’d be a fourth class citizen in the…” Mar 2, 18:11
Marie on Two Men Unalike: “Hell does not exist. Hell is a human created concept designed by the powerful to strike fear into people and…” Mar 2, 18:10
Geri on Two Men Unalike: “Fandan, I don’t understand a word of that word salad. Try again. If you really must.” Mar 2, 18:08
Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: “Anybody ken if the brain is an organ? Only, Geri’s interminable rants, and her recent claim of organ snatching, have…” Mar 2, 17:57
Mark Beggan on Two Men Unalike: “NEWS FLASH News just in. The Iranian revolutionary council is having a crisis meeting in hell.” Mar 2, 17:49
Marie on Two Men Unalike: “You would be a second class citizen in Isr Hatey. And if you owned land in West Bank it will…” Mar 2, 17:44
Aidan on Two Men Unalike: “It’s quite amazing Geri that apparently all this has been achieved by countries with no economies, no resources and weapons…” Mar 2, 17:37
Mark Beggan on Two Men Unalike: “Yes even here in Bonnie Scotland. The patchwork of Leftwing, at whatever level in society, all have the same rabid…” Mar 2, 17:36
Geri on Two Men Unalike: “One thing is crystal clear on the Scottish Independence front, Sunshine . Do not, under any circumstances, have your military…” Mar 2, 17:35
Confused on Two Men Unalike: “you admit you know fuck-all, but then have a pop anyway … how does that even make sense? – I…” Mar 2, 17:28
Geri on Two Men Unalike: ““I never post about airborne warfare.” Oh yes you do. Yer never done phappin over F-16s even though they’ve done…” Mar 2, 17:22
Geri on Two Men Unalike: “Tell the Iranians what? You wee warhawks believe any old crap the BBC propagandists tell you. There are Christians &…” Mar 2, 17:11
Hatey McHateface on Two Men Unalike: ““what expertise do you have in airborne warfare?” Compared with your obsessional butt monomania, Confused, none at all. I never…” Mar 2, 17:00